💼 Careercow Phil Elmore - Self Defense Guru

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These "self-defense" tryhards are pure gold.

I've ran into several of these guys on- and off-line, the type of guys who boldly state that they ALWAYS carry two knives so that they can take down two attackers simultaneously.:story:
 
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AnOminous said:
Fuck that. I'll buy a shark-gun-crossbow.

It's a crossbow, but it shoots guns that shoot sharks.



I love you man, but this is the SCA equivalent of the Navy SEALs copypasta. In fact, I hope someone turns it into a pasta, becasue it's awesome.
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Point being that I've enough personal experience to know what an absolutely stupid idea it is to try to use an archaic weapon in modern-day self defense, in any situation.

It's fun to run around & whomp on people with rattan or bokkens in play, or to use martial arts as exercise, but anything else will get you killed.
 
He's discovered the farms:
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he wrote 2 articles for Return of Kings
one on cracked, the other on bronies
http://www.returnofkings.com/51878/5-uncomfortable-truths-about-cracked-magazine
http://www.returnofkings.com/35343/the-rise-of-the-brony-and-the-death-of-the-american-man

because it slanders and smears the entire manosphere—that loose collection of men’s rights and men’s interests websites that includes Return of Kings—as fedora-wearing misogynist neckbeards who can’t get laid (the favorite insult of both feminists and even some members of this site when dismissing, without critical analysis, an opinion with which they disagree).
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5 Uncomfortable Truths Behind the Men’s Rights Movement.” This column is nothing more than Sargent’s hatred for non-submissive males projected onto the closest group that makes Sargent uncomfortable.
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also slightly off-topic:
http://conwebwatch.tripod.com/stories/2015/elmore.html
The following week, Elmore further attacked Wu, a transgendered person who suffers from "irrational grandiosity and self-importance."
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He probably thinks a Testudo formation is one of those African American rap groups.
 
outlook1 said:
He's discovered the farms:
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I'm hoping he makes an account here, I'd like to actually talk to him, he seems like a funny guy.

To give him a little credit, at least he seems a little laid back about his thread. Usually when cows are goofed on they chimpout or try too hard to seem non-chalant, but he seems pretty chill so far.
 
Pepsi said:
I'm hoping he makes an account here, I'd like to actually talk to him, he seems like a funny guy.

To give him a little credit, at least he seems a little laid back about his thread. Usually when cows are goofed on they chimpout or try too hard to seem non-chalant, but he seems pretty chill so far.
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Him saying "And people wonder why I have such a high opinion of myself" doesn't come across as laid back, it looks like he's trying to hide his butthurt under a layer of faux contempt
 
Phil's ideal weapon of choice? A cheap 40 dollar knife that cuts through mountain dew bottles like butter.
 
Hell if he's so obsessed with using blades as self defense weapons, why not just get a meat cleaver or something? They're way more practical and much more deadly than his little cache of overpriced flea market toys. Then again, they are the weapon of choice of those weird slanty-eyed minority criminals so that may be a conflict of interest.
 
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HoloSkull said:
Phil's ideal weapon of choice? A cheap 40 dollar knife that cuts through mountain dew bottles like butter.
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You'd be glad you had it if you were attacked in a dark alley by a gang of Mountain Dew bottles.
 
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