Yautja
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Sep 25, 2021
Orbiter Phil’s Weird Body... - Like, WTF? I’ve never seen anything like it.
- Thread starter Brandon Isn’t Who I Am
- Start date
Yautja
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Sep 25, 2021
- Joined
- Feb 6, 2021
Absolutely horrifying. It is worse than a fat person's guns. He looks hideous, just like his former time's appearance, but worse in every way.
- Joined
- Oct 3, 2018
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Jasper2K
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 15, 2021
Tbh phil looks like an aliens poor attempt to look human.
- Joined
- Oct 3, 2018
Ha! Funny you say that because I always thought he seemed like a Men in Black alien trying to hide in human society.
- Joined
- Feb 5, 2021
Now that you mention that I can believe that is a rubber mask or something and if you pull it off you'll see some weird fucker under it.
- Joined
- Dec 11, 2013
What jawline? You need an actual chin to have a jawline. Phil has no chin. That's why he wears the facial hair it gives it the illusion of one.
Fucking noodle arms and he claims he used to lift. Even if he did when he was younger and stopped 20 years ago he'd still have some kind of mass there. He's got nothing and literally no triceps.
And the worst part? He's trying to impress literal children.
- Joined
- Oct 3, 2018
- Joined
- May 5, 2020
What gets me is that he's dumb enough to not see that when you have no chin, being fat makes it exponentially worse. And he has been fat a LONG time, in fact the only photos I've seen of him where he was actually lean are from that Chinatown arcade article. This one: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/chinatown-fair-photos-the-last-arcade_n_57adcf23e4b007c36e4e351a
If he had actually been jacked back then, he would've looked better, and would certainly look better now if he hadn't let himself get fat and stay that way.
If he had actually been jacked back then, he would've looked better, and would certainly look better now if he hadn't let himself get fat and stay that way.
- Joined
- Feb 5, 2021
He admits his head is oddly shaped. How long until he admits to stroke face? Also anyone else notice his lips look bloated? Is that the gin? Also big ups to whoever shaves Phil's facial hair for leaving a massive bald spot between his half goutee and stache.
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2019
His facial hair is just, you know, unfortunate.
- Joined
- Aug 7, 2020
Nigel, I am now expecting Phil to go on a desperate goatee maintenance spree to hide the uneven, missing and greying hairs on his face, now that you've just insulted his manhood on Kiwifarts.
Do they do beard trimming at curls and twirls by any chance? Hmmm
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2019
I'm afraid he can't do much about it mate.
The fuck, they actually do. It's only a bloody tenner aswell. Come on Phil, for fuck's sake mate.
- Joined
- Oct 3, 2018
This shit had me fucking ROLLING.
- Joined
- Aug 5, 2019
There are no schedule changes.
This person could have it or, Phil is getting expensive teeth treatment.
The face touching - rubbing the temple could be some sort of root infection going on.
Now I know he always touched his face- I think that has to do with the lack of proper draining from the nasal cavity. When this starts this just tooth pain. It progresses where ENTIRE SIDE of your face is either numb or hurts like a bitch.
My theory is Phil is going in for either multiple sessions of minimal treatment. or multiple sessions. It's possible this is where the increased begging comes from.
He supposedly dislodged a piece of toritilla from his tooth. I think he get's shit stuck in there all the time which signifies a HUGE cavity problem.
Root abcess pic.
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- Joined
- May 5, 2020
I'm pretty sure the fact that he has had to save up for treatment instead of do more Champions whaling hurts him more than the treatment will.
And, because I'm not a liar, good on him for doing something about his problem, even as he lies about what he's up to. Better than letting it fester any longer, though obviously I would award more points if he had done it sooner, and been honest about fucking up with his hygiene instead of trying to act like he's perfect and never does anything wrong, if only to avoid being made fun of, despite the fact that this isn't his only problem, so it's going to happen anyway.
But other than that, I acknowledge that visiting a dentist finally is a good thing. If that's what he's doing.
And, because I'm not a liar, good on him for doing something about his problem, even as he lies about what he's up to. Better than letting it fester any longer, though obviously I would award more points if he had done it sooner, and been honest about fucking up with his hygiene instead of trying to act like he's perfect and never does anything wrong, if only to avoid being made fun of, despite the fact that this isn't his only problem, so it's going to happen anyway.
But other than that, I acknowledge that visiting a dentist finally is a good thing. If that's what he's doing.
- Joined
- Feb 5, 2021
If this is a dentist appointment fora any number of issues you just know he will bitch about it on stream and pigsplain dentistry.
- Joined
- May 5, 2020
I don't know, his actual health issues seem to be the only things he's clever enough to avoid talking about on stream. And it's probably not intelligence or awareness of the resulting jokes, so much as it is the degree to which it stings to even think about them. He doesn't talk about MidFirst either, but that's probably because he really does think he's in the clear there, and doesn't have anything to discuss.
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2019
One thing I can tell you is that even if he isn't in pain now mate, he will be after. Quite often something will be very wrong with your teeth and you might not even feel it. You have to pay attention, you know what I mean? But mate does that change right quick when a dentist starts fixing the issue. If something actually is wrong with his teeth, he will burn money bloody quick and he will be in pain.
Hopes are up lads. Well done.