Polyamory General - Polyamory drama from Facebook, Reddit, and more

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https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9flb6d/married_poly_couple_dead_bedroom_whats_next/ - A thread about a man who apparently doesn't know what a wife is supposed to be and has never heard of a roommate and/or a good friend.

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9fjvvl/would_you_break_up_with_your_polyamorous_partner/ - Another relationship saved by polyamory.

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9fjvd1/stressrant/ - A one-time cry for help on the poly boards. (JK it's been an issue for 22 days apparently https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/99eltg/depression_and_disappearing/)

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9fjlye/changing_dynamics_unsure_how_to_proceed/ - A poly redditor is unaware he's being slowly dumped and likely was cheated on. ("I found a new guy I've been thinking about since we've started dating; let's do poly and you should move out").

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9fiuy6/a_confusing_time_that_needs_assistance/ - Another marriage on the down slope as a wife spends time away from her husband to make out with the Chad level 8 Warrior from the DND club. Also, her husband apparently married her and then started doing for a full year and is the proud owner of this classy-ass tattoo (https://imgur.com/a/gdgdV#xnz74x9)
 
Why even have a relationship for that long if she's not sexually attracted to him?

:autism:

But in seriousness, I imagine they got married and then felt trapped in the marriage. It sounds like the other aspects of the marriage were fine save for some sexual comparability and it also sounds like they don't realize you can have a good non-sexual relationship with other people and those people are called good friends.
 
OP saves future STD epidemiologists some work with a handy graph
View attachment 539678

In the immortal words of Common Filth, "this is a really complicated way of saying 'all these people have herpes.'"

Though I'm on the fence on how poly this actually is; it seems like there's a couple guys with colons more compromised than Zinnia Jones' (that one in New York, JFC) and everyone else is just gay Eskimo brothers.
 
Jesus fuck, just get a godamn divorce already.

Agreed.

From the Post: "Wow! I found the article. It’s just what I needed. I’m way too involved in what she’s doing. Fuck it. Let her have her time and I’ll get mine sometime. Love it. Thank you, I feel better already."

"I’m way too involved in what she’s doing."


SHE'S. YOUR. WIFE.

"wife"

This isn't even about manhood or ego. It's about what bond you have. You aren't involved in who your wife is fucking and that's not going to either result in a rift in your relationship or the end of it? Her intimate bond with this other man shouldn't concern you? Do you really think that won't take away from yours?

"But love is not a starvation economy". Bullshit. You only have so many calories and so many hours in a day. This is division, plain and simple. You getting jewed, bro.

Is this the "redefinition" of marriage that they keep going on about? Talk about taking the low road. If this is the supposed wave of the future, I'll happily stay in the dark ages.
 
(she has one additional partner she finds sex easy with, I don’t at the moment but have in the past and likely will again)
I'm allosexual and nesting with my mostly-asexual (but not sex repulsed) partner. Sex was part of our early NRE relationship, as that's the main stage where their libido is activated. But after 1.5 years together, our sex life is barely a blip on the screen. I've experienced some sadness around their lack of interest--especially when we stopped having sex while they were having it with newer partners
My partner's libido is only present during [the honeymoon phase] (and even then only sometimes)

:story::story::story:
 
Pro-tip for fellow farmers on these and any reddit folks, always go an extra layer deeper and check their posting history for more lolworthy context. For example...

My spouse and I negotiated to take sex off the table about a year ago. I spent most of the year struggling to be ok with it and ultimately realizing I just wasn't, so we recently renegotiated to put it back on and work on finding ways to make it work for both of us.
I'm... formally diagnosed with ADHD
My experience with MediCal was that all covered prescriptions (including my T and the needles to inject it) were covered 100%, no copays, and "medically necessary" just means you have a diagnosis of gender dysphoria, which doesn't require suicidal ideation.

I'm allosexual and nesting with my mostly-asexual (but not sex repulsed) partner. Sex was part of our early NRE relationship, as that's the main stage where their libido is activated. But after 1.5 years together, our sex life is barely a blip on the screen. I've experienced some sadness around their lack of interest--especially when we stopped having sex while they were having it with newer partners.
I'm currently living my best life with regard to having multiple relationships
I'm going to get queer-ass-married to my nesting partner B. We've been together over 1.5 years ... However, I’ve been with my boyfriend S for almost 6 years .. Not only for the obvious reason that he's already married to his co-parent, but because we are honestly not compatible for a relationship more complicated and integrated than we have now.

Her housemate is tired of having sex with her and it looks like she's her boyfriend's side piece and can't stand him very much. Sounds like paradise to me.

That's what my wife and I have just recently done. It's only been a month, so I can't speak to the longer term. So far, it's made our lives so much better.
Sure, there's all the same life-related issues to deal with, but we've always been pretty good at that. We've got our own spaces in the house (she took the guest room and turned it into hers), and this feels like a very livable solution.
Sexual intimacy with the people I share that connection with is my favorite thing, bar none.
Our primary issues stem from our love languages and just how far apart they are when it comes to things like touch and initiating physical affection and all that.
I have my hair dyed bright pinkish-purple
I just recently celebrated my 15th anniversary with my wife, but was going out of town on the actual day, so we spent time the say before, and she ended up having her boyfriend over for the night of our actual anniversary.
My wife and I are great friends. We're splitting up, but are still very much friends
My kids have met my wife's partners

Sure sounds like a relationship unwinding and you unknowingly getting ready to be a every-other-weekend dad instead of making your life better.
 
9kanhp54wqp01.jpg

https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9gem6w/i_dont_think_i_be_poly_anymore/

Oh no, who could have seen this happening?
 
So the guy is caught between these two women who both want him all to themselves and both are terrifying BPD harpies, is that the point of this?

All three of them are insane and deserve each other.
 
https://old.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/9gyaw9/feeling_hurt_by_a_conversation_i_had_with_my/ - Poly girls gets HPV, poly guy uses it as an icebreaker to talk to an ex he had previously blocked. "Hey, you might be at risk for HPV but also how you doin?".

Here's a brief look at the posting history - a sad tale told through reddit comments.
My boyfriend hasn’t been so lucky using condoms. Every time he has sex with either of his casual partners, he’s experiencing a barrier failure. Most of the time the condom slips off, but there have been breaks as well.
Myself and one of my partners have oral HSV1. I take medication when I have an outbreak and abstain from oral sex until it clears. We were all tested within the last 3 months and there were no concerns.
Before having sex with anyone new, I have a discussion about safe sex practices. I ask how often they practice safe sex and when they were last tested.
I found out last night that I have high-risk HPV.
 
So, to boil it down, "forget being happy in your relationship. Now I'm going to spend several paragraphs bitching and moaning about how I'm not happy in mine, and end with describing my long string of abject failures as some kind of achievement."

"it's possible," she says, having written four paragraphs about how she's looking for a normal relationship, and only holds on to her tamagotchi bf because he's better than nothing
 
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