Polyamory General - Polyamory drama from Facebook, Reddit, and more

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knightlautrec said:
'I refuse to edit my behaviour to make her feel comfortable'

That may be the most singularly selfish thing I've ever seen someone write with the utmost self importance and righteousness. That's their friend who is understandably upset about them attempting to fuck their ex.

No wonder they treat their partners like absolute garbage. They can barely treat anyone else with respect.
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the poly idea that you don't have to care about anyone else's feelings is really appalling to me and also makes me wonder what kind of upbringing they had. like in normal people world going out with the guy your friend had a bad breakup with six months ago makes you a jerk. and there's tons of other times when normal people will change their behavior to not hurt their friends because they care about their friends' feelings because why wouldn't they?

also, i went to this chick's profile, and her friend has 'complex ptsd, developmental trauma, [and] suffers from insomnia and panic attacks'.
and this:
polyawful1.png

i feel like i'm reading a robot attempt to understand humanity.

she also lives in austin and likes sam harris because...of course.
 
Crunchy Leaf said:
the poly idea that you don't have to care about anyone else's feelings is really appalling to me and also makes me wonder what kind of upbringing they had. like in normal people world going out with the guy your friend had a bad breakup with six months ago makes you a jerk. and there's tons of other times when normal people will change their behavior to not hurt their friends because they care about their friends' feelings because why wouldn't they?

also, i went to this chick's profile, and her friend has 'complex ptsd, developmental trauma, [and] suffers from insomnia and panic attacks'.
and this:
View attachment 768495
i feel like i'm reading a robot attempt to understand humanity.

she also lives in austin and likes sam harris because...of course.
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I think it was a concept pseudo-intellectuals stole from therapy columns, and then misapplied to all relationships. When you deal with manipulative people, there's the rule that you can only be responsible for your own feelings, because they will keep suicide baiting or whatever as long as it gets results. It's not supposed to be for dealing with the people you want in your life.

I knew somebody IRL who was this way, he talked it up as emotional maturity, but conveniently his behavior towards other people was worse than average. What a coincidence. 🤔
 
I thought it meant "hollow gesture which I can pathetically pretend is a sign of caring".
 
AprilRains said:
I thought it meant "hollow gesture which I can pathetically pretend is a sign of caring".
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Hollow gestures by hollow people in hollow relationships, all under the guise of being capable of so much more caring and love than normal monogamous people. I think your take sums the whole shebang up pretty well.
 
SO do these people have little calendars to denote when exactly its their day to be the one whos getting the attention?

Also if whenever the three of you are together at a group event hes always totally focused on her it means your the side chick/dude
 
Salt_Merchant said:
SO do these people have little calendars to denote when exactly its their day to be the one whos getting the attention
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I was thinking the same thing. They claim their relationships are so healthy and natural yet they dissect it harder than a frog in science class. That doesn't sound natural, it sounds exhausting.
Also, it's yet more evidence that these people don't have friends, only potential fuckbuddies.
 
Solzhenitsyn said:
I was thinking the same thing. They claim their relationships are so healthy and natural yet they dissect it harder than a frog in science class. That doesn't sound natural, it sounds exhausting.
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I think they suffer from something similar to buyers remorse. They've put so much effort and wasted so much time on a spider web of a relationship that they don't want to admit it was a mistake. They're to scared to give it all up and start over because that's too much work. It's just like those couples that are in a loveless relationship for years only times 3 or 5 depending on how many are in it.
 
Solzhenitsyn said:
That doesn't sound natural
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I think that's what get me (almost) as much as their general deviancy: it's the esoteric language they use that attempts to straddle the line between cute and practical to try and normalize the behaviour but that ends up failing completely both ways and just comes across as cold and insular and degenerate. Like when they use the word "date". I am not kidding when I say that the poly people I know have ruined this word for me to the point that when I hear it I instinctively cringe.

I probably wouldn't care half as much about this if they weren't obsessed with talking about it in front of other people as if it was perfectly cool and fine. Nothing says dinner plans like discussing potential STDs some dude you fucked a week ago might have given to you, in the company of family and guests, as if it was like picking up milk at the store.
 
Polyamory isn't a real thing. It's always just some disgusting fat bitch or some weenie soy boy that is so desperate for a mate and limited in options, they're willing to let other people fuck their mate rathet than be alone.
 
Brain Problems said:
I think that's what get me (almost) as much as their general deviancy: it's the esoteric language they use that attempts to straddle the line between cute and practical to try and normalize the behaviour but that ends up failing completely both ways and just comes across as cold and insular and degenerate. Like when they use the word "date". I am not kidding when I say that the poly people I know have ruined this word for me to the point that when I hear it I instinctively cringe.

I probably wouldn't care half as much about this if they weren't obsessed with talking about it in front of other people as if it was perfectly cool and fine. Nothing says dinner plans like discussing potential STDs some dude you fucked a week ago might have given to you, in the company of family and guests, as if it was like picking up tard cum at the store.
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Worse than "date" is "play date." Shudder.
 
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