Post the funniest Random.txt.

[AnsemSoD1]

Null is a dull lull: LOL

 

[LifeAlert]

"I've beaten a man unconscious with my bare hands while bleeding from a gunshot wound, and on a different occasion sliced open another like a salmon while staring him in the eyes”

 

[Crypt Kicker]

I have refreshed this page a thousand times to find the perfect random.txt and nothing satisfies

 

[AnsemSoD1]

Not cool man, now everyone is going to rate my posts dumb and autistic!

 

[Crypt Kicker]

Not cool man, now everyone is going to rate my posts dumb and autistic!

Here, you can have this one, my friend.
I finally found it, gives me a hearty chuckle. Ha-Ha.

“Abortion—I say borty, a fun thing to do when you're feeling spörty”

 

[Dagoth AMOGUS]

”plant your seed in my greasy pussy”

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

Sponsored by Kraken Rum.

 

[Mark Knopfler]

I'm quite partial to "That's not a prank that's INCEST you HILLBILLY CHICKEN!"

 

[Toji Suzuhara]

#Kiwifarms is the largest conglomerate of retarded uneducated aborted children ever to sign up on social media.
(Put that on the tag, #Null)

 

[Tenshi Eating A Corn Dog!]

“My thoughts were constantly interrupted by intrusive Jewish thoughts. Is it Sabbath? what time is sundown? Does this granola bar contain dairy? ... Is the Cloisters Museum within my eruv? When was my last menstrual period?”

 

[From The Uncanny Valley]

"Bane pls not me, dun play minecraft"

 

[invisibult plus+]

 

[Brenda Holiday]

Xander, I didn’t dox him. That’s not true. That’s not true and a matter of fact, no it’s not true, no it’s not true, FUCK YOURSELF YOU PIECE OF SHIT FAGGOT MOTHERFUCKER, NO IT’S NOT TRUE! PIECE OF SHIT, AND IF I HAD TO GUESS IT WAS PROBABLY YOU THAT FUCKING DOXXED HIM, MOTHERFUCKING LYING COCKSUCKING FAGGOT MOTHERFUCKER!

YOU LOST JOSHUA MOON, YOU FAILED JOSHUA MOON, YOU'RE DUMB JOSHUA MOON, YOU'RE THE DUMBEST LITIGANT EVER JOSHUA MOON, YOU'RE A FAILURE JOSHUA MOON

ITS OK, GO TO BED MY DARLING!!! AHAHAHAHHA DANCE FAGGOT DANCE!!!!

GET YOU APRONS

 

[TheOtherSideofMakeBelieve]

I have a screenshot saved somewhere but back in the Total Retard War days I got the flashing rainbow 'lol calm down' .txt above the total retard war banner. Very kino

 

[Hamplanet Fitness]

IDK lol apparently I'm "a woman" because I have a uterus

 

[Breadbassket]

”I am off my meds and I am online!”

 

[Crex Crex]

I've been trolled and don't know what to do on Kiwifarms, please help

 

[Calvin Gabriel]

[Eating a whole pizza]
"Are you a nutritionist or something?"

 

[IamnottheNSA]

”There's a snake in his boot. And by "a snake" I mean "shit". And by "boot" I mean "post".”

 

[AnsemSoD1]

Yiff yiff! That is what the foxes say.