r/polyamory

[Doug_Hitzel]

What’s the difference between a parrot and a polyamorous person?
Polly wants a cracker and poly is crackers!

Thank you, I’ll be here all week!
Two drink minimum and don’t forget to tip your waitress with your dick!

 

[Vorhtbame]

"Male, 44, never wanted to have kids but have recently been wondering how it is to live with kids and thinking it'd be kinda cool"

Literal manchild at age 44.

Or looking to extend his poly circle.

Yes, give me your Horrifying ratings.

 

[Nekromantik]

A woman who knew first-hand the shitty consequences of being Poly denied a Poly couple to live in her place. They proceed to talk about how denying people who might have potentially dangerous social lives that could cause problems for the owner of the establishment is the same as not letting Jews live there.
View attachment 307639
http://archive.is/MWV31

Next thing you know their going to make polys wear patches for identification. Maybe a bio symbol for herpes.

 

[CabbageMan]

Or looking to extend his poly circle.

Yes, give me your Horrifying ratings.

I don't have that one, so you get Islamic content since they marry kiddies.

 

[Asa_Spades60]

Fuck everything and bathe us in nuclear hellfire

With the way things are going, that may happen sooner than later.

 

[ICametoLurk]

Not only are they terrifying their grandparents that they are mentally ill sluts, but also their fellow employees

 

[Varg Did Nothing Wrong]

WHY DO THESE PEOPLE GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THEIR COWORKERS KNOWING WHO THEY LIKE TO FUCK

JESUS CHRIST SHUT UP NOBODY CARES

 

[Crunchy Leaf]

It's hard for me to know how to feel about that, because there's certainly people who would say coming out as gay at work is inappropriate, and I would disagree. But poly just feels sleazy to me in a way being gay doesn't.

 

[Blarmed&Dangerous]

It's hard for me to know how to feel about that, because there's certainly people who would say coming out as gay at work is inappropriate, and I would disagree. But poly just feels sleazy to me in a way being gay doesn't.

Right? Especially when they could just come out as having a cluster-B personality disorder and be more concise.

 

[Zarkov]

WHY DO THESE PEOPLE GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THEIR COWORKERS KNOWING WHO THEY LIKE TO FUCK

JESUS CHRIST SHUT UP NOBODY CARES

Because they're attention whores. Their relationships keep failing horribly because they're not motivated by having a healthy sex life that suits them. They just want to feel superior to all those normie cucks and their boring, patriarchal monogamous relationships.

 

[Maggots on a Train]

A woman who knew first-hand the shitty consequences of being Poly denied a Poly couple to live in her place. They proceed to talk about how denying people who might have potentially dangerous social lives that could cause problems for the owner of the establishment is the same as not letting Jews live there.
View attachment 307639
http://archive.is/MWV31

It's great how he doesn't think even for a second about how his potential housemates would be impacted by him dragging home a constant stream of multiple random strangers every week.

Those yuppies were living a decent lifestyle, and this asshole wanted to drag them down to crackhouse expectations.

 

[LtCucumber]

After seeing all the posts on "man in relationship with woman wants to see other people. Opens up relationship. He doesn't get any but his girlfriend/wife does. He gets mad about it as it didn't work out how he wanted it to" it's reminded me of a funny story that happened before my second year of college.

The whole thing is pretty much proof of poly people being fucking weird and jealous. I'll post about it when I find my glasses.

 

[Solzhenitsyn]

It's hard for me to know how to feel about that, because there's certainly people who would say coming out as gay at work is inappropriate, and I would disagree. But poly just feels sleazy to me in a way being gay doesn't.

Gay's a bit different, though. That's testing the waters to see if you work in a safe environment, and things like if you're in a place where it's acceptable to bring your partner to a work function without being bashed or subject to comments. Poly people just want attention towards their lifestyle.

 

[Nekromantik]

Gay's a bit different, though. That's testing the waters to see if you work in a safe environment, and things like if you're in a place where it's acceptable to bring your partner to a work function without being bashed or subject to comments. Poly people just want attention towards their lifestyle.

The biggest problem with poly, and really any other weird fetish, is that they get so used to their little circle of the internet telling them what their doing is right and normal/should be normal that they can't wrap their head around the idea that normal people in the real world don't go around talking about what get them off 24/7. But instead of taking a step back and thinking hey maybe my coworkers and family don't want to hear about my 3 boyfriend and 2 girlfriends, they think

 

[PrincessHomura]

The biggest problem with poly, and really any other weird fetish, is that they get so used to their little circle of the internet telling them what their doing is right and normal/should be normal that they can't wrap their head around the idea that normal people in the real world don't go around talking about what get them off 24/7. But instead of taking a step back and thinking hey maybe my coworkers and family don't want to hear about my 3 boyfriend and 2 girlfriends, they think
View attachment 307816

Just like furries.

 

[CrimsonKnight]

Because they're attention whores. Their relationships keep failing horribly because they're not motivated by having a healthy sex life that suits them. They just want to feel superior to all those normie cucks and their boring, patriarchal monogamous relationships.

Also, by adding in more people to the relationship, they are adding more fuel to the fire. It's like they think only for themselves, oh wait, they only think for themselves.

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

I've never even really got the idea of the "fuck buddy" or "swingers" thing. If you are fucking other people just because they are a dick or a hole on legs, why aren't you just using a toy? Because that's all you see each other as. Seems like a lot more work and time just for a sex toy on legs.

Plus there's those stories I've heard of "Oh I have this fuck buddy on the side, but they've told me they've actually fallen for me, what do I do?"

Fuckbuddies are a lot more fun than doing it by yourself. If you can find one that doesn't get the feels, it's pretty awesome.

The best is if you have one that you have sex with and then they leave right after.

That being said, if you get a cray-cray fuckbuddy that gets the feels, your life is gonna suck for a bit

 

[Medicated]

With the way things are going, that may happen sooner than later.

Yeah I been hearing that since the beginning of mass media.

 

[LtCucumber]

Alright I found my glasses and I've had time to do stuff and have coffee so I guess I could put another experience with poly people on here. It's a long story but if you want to bask in the pure :autism:, go ahead.
Once again, boatload of :powerlevel: but I thought it would be a good example of something a few people in the thread have mentioned, that being "someone wants to be in a non-monogamous relationship/friends with benefits situation to keep their options open but then they get mad that the other person gets lucky"
I may remove the story purely because it's really long and i don't know how relevant it is. I thought it would be as it's about someone who wanted non-monogamy but then gets mad about it when you make use of it being non-monogamous. If that's the case tell me and I'll keep it to the TLDR at the end alone

Spoiler: long story

I will preface this with the fact that that this person never specifically said "poly" but I deem "open relationship" and poly to be one in the same.

I wasn't looking for anything serious at the time, and was pretty much just looking for a hookup or someone i could keep as a booty call and found someone on Tinder. We hit it off and met a couple times before hooking up and he made it very clear we aren't in a relationship. That's fine with me.

We acted like a couple but weren't one. I guess it's what he wanted out of the relationship? I wasn't fussed as I was still getting some. The relationship we had "open friends with benefits"/"open relationship without the romance" scenario (making his later actions even more :autism was a mutual agreement. He was telling me that I could see other people... Even though I was still technically single. Makes sense, even though I didn't really need his "permission" as we weren't exclusive/in a relationship.

Later on in the year there was something going on near him and he asked if I could join him and his friends. I stayed at his house the night before and was supposed to stay for the weekend. Shit hit the fan on the first day of this event. All day, he's telling people "we're not together in that sense" when they commented on "you guys are a cute couple" (cringe), which is true, so it wasn’t a big deal. At this event there was a lot of drinking. AKA we took a shit ton of beer and stuff to this event to share between us and his friends to get shitfaced. I get horrendously drunk and meet some interesting girls and guys. One of which I went home with and we hooked up.

Not too long after I leave this guy’s place, I get a text from this guy, calling me a cunt, the whole “we're done" spiel as if I cheated on him. At the time I was apologetic as I didn't realise he had some form of attachment to me and actually felt kinda bad about it... Not long after, I realised he was fucking stupid. He said we could see other people, and didn’t object to us going to this guy’s house. He bailed on us and from what I remember I asked if I should go with and he said no. I was still single at the end of the day.

Had to get a ride home, I was really drunk and couldn't exactly go back to this guy's house.

Even had to wait for him to cool down before I could get my shit back though half of it went missing. He admitted that his sister took a few things of mine. Didn't want anything else to do with him so I just let it go as I got my tablet back and that's all I really needed to get back from his house.

TL/DR: Got into a non-monogamous friends with benefits-type relationship with a commie. He got mad I fucked someone else, and autistically screeched at me about it over text. Bonus points for the fact that when i went to get my stuff back from his house half my stuff had been nicked by either him or his sibling.

I guess this is exactly what @Hollywood Hulk Hogan was talking about with weird fuck buddies getting their feels caught up in it. It's fucking annoying. The whole situation after he bitched me out for doing something that was actually completely okay was a bloody headache that I'm never dealing with again.

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

Every time I see a poly woman on OKCupid or Tinder, they're fat with blue hair and have facial piercings