r/polyamory

Francis Dollarhyde said:
I would not know about over there, but I know for the Benelux (and Sweden has something exactly if not very close to it) they have something called a "samenlevingscontract", which literally means "living together contract". It can contain what you want, as much as you want making it like a marriage and more (quite similar anyway), or as little as you want. You cannot just draw one up yourself, it has to be done with lawyers and through a notary, who has to have it on file, if not most judges will declare it invalid when it comes to issues with taxes or government (inheritance, paternity, estates and taxes, etc). In Sweden the term is exactly the same, they call it "sambo" for short (forgot the long word for it), forgot the details for a sambo though but it was quite similar to the Benelux.

A marriage you could import, like from Morocco or Turkey for example (99% of marriages with multiple wives were just that), could be between many wives and a man, as long as you say "religion, racism!" and they just accepted it. And then the government caught on, a dude with 4 wives in 4 homes on welfare as he had a gf in his own house, nope. So now a marriage is strictly between 2 people. So polygamists use the samenlevingscontract but just have a lot more people sign it. And because such a contract can contain exactly what a registered partnership entails (save for a few details) there you go.
Important to note that a registered partnership is a marriage where you do not have to say yes but still have to bring witnesses, and where you do not automatically were the daddy like in marriage, and they changed that to always the daddy in 2014 anyway. There are a few more things, like in case of divorce and then death in marriage all your stuff goes to your ex, the end, which does not fly in registered partnerships. All in all the differences are minor, and it takes 2 minutes and 2 signatures and saying yes to each other and you are now husband and wife instead of partners, the differences are that minor.

You can still make a legal entity to protect assets, and it probably could be made to work like a marriage somewhat, but rules are a bitch to make that work, NV is anonymous as the N "nameless" part implies which bla bla, conclusion will not work, not even mentioning the minimum cashflow, and minimum sold and paid for shares, €40K minimum, personal responsiblity with BV since they are all flex versions now, could try Ltd. but tax service will be eating out of your ass everyday and you can count on extra risk with that, have to start it up in London and then go to Commerce Chamber to transfer shit, lot of work and money and it would not serve its purpose well or at all. Forget fancy stuff and weird shenanigans, just a few contracts and done.
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Yes! That was exactly what she was talking about.

:sadface: That was exactly what she was talking about.
 
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Bit of an update on my dumbass friend:

So, apparently he's been making plans to slam a chick in the town where I live that he moved from a few years back. Barring the fact that he's broke as shit with a garbage car, a legitimately crazy wife, and that he ain't ever coming back this way ever again, this chick has... issues...

She's an old friend of one of my former roommates that went to prison for non-fatally stabbing her parents when the parents were having a three way with this chick's prior best friend. Also she's a straight up single mom (child adopted from her sister because her womb is deserted), a serious alcoholic, and has been mixed up with meth. A bunch of times. Probably why her womb is deserted.

This dude is going to get his balls set on fire. Like, the whole situation is just a setup for catastrophic failure when it bottoms out and it's going to cause so much goddamn pain. Our relationship has already begun deteriorating because he doesn't make time for anything that doesn't have a vagina. Nigga's, like, 33 so I'm near positive it's a mid-life crisis, but the way it's going to finalize it's more likely going to be an end-of-life crisis.
 
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It's almost like he's become embroiled in this disgusting sex-cult and I want to scream in his face and be like "stop this now, you're going to irrevocably damage everyone involved in this shit" but I don't think there's any way I can deprogram his dumb ass. He's not smart enough or mature enough to participate in a functional polyamorous relationship, if there even is such a thing (:optimistic:).

He's using the prospect of meaningless sex to fill an emptiness inside himself; You can't fill a stomach with junk food, it'll just make you sick.
 
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Sometimes the best and most merciful thing you can do is just let the fire burn itself out and not get involved
AprilRains said:
33 is only mid-life if you intend to die early. It sounds like he qualifies.
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That's the thing with people that fall into shit like this, they're too mentally and emotionally immature to deal with the fact that their days of being young, dumb and full of cum are going to come to an end some day, so they'd rather be the fire that burns twice as bright but only half as long so they can go out believing they were sex deities in their time. That's a mindset this guy and others like him should've grown out of more than a decade ago if it weren't for the fact they haven't gotten it into their heads that they can't have their cake and eat it too
 
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Hux said:
Sometimes the best and most merciful thing you can do is just let the fire burn itself out and not get involved

That's the thing with people that fall into shit like this, they're too mentally and emotionally immature to deal with the fact that their days of being young, dumb and full of cum are going to come to an end some day, so they'd rather be the fire that burns twice as bright but only half as long so they can go out believing they were sex deities in their time. That's a mindset this guy and others like him should've grown out of more than a decade ago if it weren't for the fact they haven't gotten it into their heads that they can't have their cake and eat it too
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*crack
*sip

Yeah, still got the moves, he thinks as he goes after fruit so low as to be below his knees
 
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TaimuRadiu said:
*crack
*sip

Yeah, still got the moves, he thinks as he goes after fruit so low as to be below his knees
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That's usually how guys like him work, going for quantity over quality, so they go after the homely stort of women who will agree to fuck within the first few dates since they've been starved of any semblance of love and affection of any kind and are willing to take whatever they can get. This of course leads to them becoming heartbroken and jaded as soon as the guy disappears from her life as he goes out to find another sorry sap of a woman to scrub, rinse and repeat with.

This shit and Polyamory in general is the ultimate consequence of hammering it into the heads of adult mental/emotional children that sex is a numbers game when it doesn't really need to be, thusly also leading to shit like incel culture being a thing
 
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A whinge about safe sex for Polys.
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Doormat gets cucked by a woman.
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And finally;
Aspiring Adulterer is conflicted.
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Personally i wouldn't care that much about so called polyrelations if polys didn't try so much to make themselves into the next opressed 'minority'.Polys today seem increasingly focused on positioning themselves as being an opressed minority and finding any sort of 'evidence' of their opression.Say what you will about someone like Errol Flynn but he never complained about how society doesn't get his desires.He may have been a drunk ,drug addict and sex offender but he didn't blame society for not getting it.
 
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iafiv said:
Personally i wouldn't care that much about so called polyrelations if polys didn't try so much to make themselves into the next opressed 'minority'.Polys today seem increasingly focused on positioning themselves as being an opressed minority and finding any sort of 'evidence' of their opression.Say what you will about someone like Errol Flynn but he never complained about how society doesn't get his desires.He may have been a drunk ,drug addict and sex offender but he didn't blame society for not getting it.
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In western society, homosexuals and transsexuals went from being ostracized and in some cases literally imprisoned to politically and societally protected in a remarkably short period of time; practically a single generation. So it's only natural that practitioners of other kinks like polyamorists would try to associate with the LGBT movement and try to attain some of the same legitimacy, as zoophiles and literal pedophiles have also tried to do.
 
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Jesus Christ, guys. Long time lurker first time poster here, but this is it. This is the post that got me. I joined just so I could share this cursed post with all of you: link

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TL;DR: Guy finds new chick, breaks up with 4-year girlfriend by springing all the issues he has with their relationship on her at once. She says she'll make changes to address those issues (which is exactly what the subreddit tells people to do) and he says "nah" and leaves to be with new chick. Same shit different day.

It's the comments that got me. Got some quality responses in here about how this is all on OP and how dare she feel hurt by this:
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"I was on the other side of this. [Proceeds to describe the commentor did the same thing to his ex and is now happily married to the new girl.] We, all of us, love fully and without restrictions; we're all happy. It's a beautiful thing."​

Don't you want your ex to be happy, OP?

"I suspect that's what has happened here. Didn't realize just how much this stuff was bothering him until he had something to compare it to. But that's not because it wasn't bothering him."​

Your relationship was actually shit. If it wasn't shit this wouldn't have happened.

"OP needs to actually reflect on the relationship."​

Might polyamory cause issues? No, it is the relationship that was wrong.

"Diving into polyamory can definitely be a danger to a long term relationship if the partner finds somebody who seems better to them overall than their nesting partner. It's only natural for people to compare partners, unfortunately."​

Remember kids, in polyamory, you need to constantly compete against your metamors! Only it's totally not a competition and also we all love each other and jealousy isn't a thing.

"Go through the grieving process here and then spend some time figuring yourself out."​

This is a you problem.

"Your person wasn’t practicing polyam. Your person was in love and wanted a relationship with another person besides you."​

Something something no true Scotsman.
 
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NoReturn said:
Jesus Christ, guys. Long time lurker first time poster here, but this is it. This is the post that got me. I joined just so I could share this cursed post with all of you: link
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It's sad anyone is surprised that when they agree to get cucked, they actually get cucked. What did they expect?
 
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