random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[BirdUp]

My foreskin is firmly intact and rather prominent.

 

[S.C.U.D.]

There is an entire planet dedicated to hating on men already. It's called Earth.

 

[keytar]

He could never believe Dick Gay Porn Jr was stalking him, only that Bob Gay Porn Jr is doing so.

 

[Onni Kalsarikännit]

The fact that any woman that's had her snatch tainted with pigcock doesn't immediately self-immolate proves there's no God.

 

[Autistic Joe]

"Hello, is this the gambler hotline? I would like to request some juice!"

 

[Path Wanderer]

Kim Jung Un allegedly stole the juice.

キウイファーム

 

[Blackhole]

Those are your delusions again, confused senior citizen child. Yes, you do need better coverage. No, you did not ask me to leave. And, yes, you have already signed the contract. Wait for the recurring payments, customer.

You have been instructed, thousands of times, to cease contacting this subconscious. Continuing to do so constitutes felony dream harassment. Do not contact this sleep state again.

“I AM NIGGER TOAST”

There is an entire planet dedicated to hating on men already. It's called Earth.

 

[Return of the Freaker]

HOT WOMEN would like to EAT your MAKEUP, gone SEXUAL, 18+ (ANAL)

 

[Gentlebastard]

a comedian & purveyor of pancakes

It seems that I'm not up to date with my racism knowledge.

Here's a toast to another 4000 buses full of niggers, and many more, until Manhattan sinks into the fucking ocean and beyond.

>purity culture

Nigger what? We living in the same America? If not can I live in your's?

This dude absolutely positively date-rapes.

If the author's non-logic applies then Kiwi Farms is the greatest work of art since Gaudi's Sagrada Família.

Uhhhh, I don't mean to be a dick or nothing, but your chart says you're fucked up... uh, you talk like a fag... and your shit's all retarded.

This thread warms the cockles of my cold, black heart.

Why is it always one form of crazy or another. Why can't you fuckers just be FUCKING normal holy shit.

I'd want a crying room too if I had to be subjected to talk show non-medy every day.

more people enjoy antisemitism than suffer from it

This piece of shit is unbefuckinglievable. The chair-straining blob of what used to be a adult man is gasping for breath with every sentence, and now his voice is unmistakably tinged with groaning notes of chronic pain, and he's using these precious moments of (barely fitting the concept) life in order to lecture us on fucking fast-food chicken nuggets. What an absolute goddamn waste of existence.

They're like two halves of the Demon Core, chain-reacting out of control by their continued interaction. Except instead of Gamma radiation that will melt your skin off, it's waves of stupidity that will launch your ribs into outer space.

You were born too late to explore the seven seas.

You were born too early to explore the vast reaches of space.

But you were born just in time to experience Patrick S. Tomlinson.

Any time he gets absolutely rekt he has to make it worse for himself. Hes a self sustaining form of cow, always willing to milk himself for more laughs by being a complete fat retard.

All "adult Pokemon fans" should be looked at with suspicion.

I don't know if I'm gonna enjoy the Psychotic break arc

I didn't think he could possibly surpass his pizza topping measurement video

Those degenerate faggots realize that pokemon are animals right? So they want to fuck animals now. At least it isn't little kids.

 

[Pedophobe]

A morbidly obese figure in a flowered tarp was seen hurpling from the scene of the crime.

"Enjoy prison, stalker."

Maybe he's getting his money's worth, or maybe not, but I'm certainly getting his money's worth. Which is the most important thing.

 

[Kheapathic]

The very literal tallest midget of Latin America, both in population and economy.

 

[Yamamura]

"DAMN I shouldn't have done that! Now I have to do it again!"

Women sense my power and they seek the life essence. I do not avoid women, Mandrake. But I do deny them my essence.

 

[Geranium]

I wouldnt be surprised if the reason he is depressed is he wants to be an smol uwu femboy or something but is instead a bald fat black man. At least he is loosing weight.

 

[make_it_so]

Yah, I'm fapping to a catboy with a huge dick.

 

[Dire Dire Cocks]

Did you really necro this thread to defend Hitler? WTF even is the world anymore....

 

[Seafarer]

I can't say I've ever heard anyone express the opinion that the real tragedy of the synoptic Gospels was that the 1st century Jews had not invented the Reddit suicide prevention bot.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

It's okay though, Rom found himself a gypsy hooker to marry, and ended up as the Grand Nagus.

I thought his gimmick was eating a lot of food but it's actually wasting money on sports games. That's much worse.

 

[BohrokSwarms]

Has “And I forgive MewTwo for insulting me.” been added yet?

 

[Azdy]

Since I have autism or some other mental illness, (also why I'm A KF user) I am an adult and like Lego.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

plenty of those guys would feel no shame at having a woman see them watch doka doka chan rape adventures or whatever.