random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[The Projects]

You think you can out condescend me stalker child? Wrong! Think again. Now everyone knows you must not bathe because you disagreed with me. Your life is already over, see you in the light-bulb-factory FEMA work camps.

 

[World Famous Quasi Payer]

Only on this site would a woman-hate thread become an impromptu meeting of the Bronte Sisters Book Club.

 

[CansOfCant]

If I was black I'd be taking advantage of my N-Word pass all day long.

 

[Pig Cups]

I would 41% if I had the face of anyone in this thread and yes I’m including the baby

 

[Meat Target]

Where do you even buy sweatshirts that advertise your rape/murder plans?

Behaving this Indian is some sort of antisemitic race-traitorism.

 

[Gentlebastard]

We are the closest thing this poor bastard has to readers and fans.

Once you're nonbinary, anyone you're fucking is also a queer by the homo-associate property; it's like that old Groucho Marx joke, anyone who would sleep with you must be gay

The Internet has become a perpetual game of John Carpenter's The Thing. Nobody knows who to trust any more, anyone could be indian... It could even be YOU.

I broke my "no eating in the car" rule ONCE and immediately spilled ranch all over the seat. I still can't get the stain out... NEVER AGAIN.

I'm not sure exactly how I'd describe why they look wrong and gross but they absolutely look wrong and gross.

It's like they got a really primitive version of ChatGPT which was trained on ~2014 Tumblr posts and was then prompted to write some really boring shit.

When someone is born without working legs, society feels bad for them and tries to help them integrate.

When someone is born without working wings, no one gives a fuck because no shit you're not supposed to have wings.

I own a decorative (I swear) copy of Fuck 2. (I couldn't find Fuck because it was out of print.)

Is it illegal to visit Portland, wear a skin suit so you look like a black man, run into a bar and scream "THIS IS FOR COLONIZATION!" then poop on the floor of the bar?

He's a reminder that life is fleeting and that when we're old and on our way out, the forces of the universe keep chugging along, with or without us.

There are more things to hate Elon for than there are stars in the sky, but one of them is charging for the use of Twitter's automated posting API, even for non-commercial users, which forced the shutdown of @JAVdottxt.

Normally I'm not pedantic about this shit but I feel like this thread is one place online you should know the difference between niggard and niggered.

That's the face of someone who googles how to roofie a person.

 

[Counterfeit Obol]

Even his food drools.

 

[Meat Target]

Choose from
our variety of exit options, including:

Sparkling Clean Oxygen Deprivation
Effortless Electrocution
Painless Poison Pill

Don't worry about the mess - we've got that covered too! Our eco-friendly recycling program ensures that your
remains are handled with care.

Call 1-800-BYE-BYE or visit our website at EuphorixExitBooth.com

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

This would lead to the most popular new name for children in 2026 being “Faggy McFagface”

Even his food drools.

Yeah, yeah, that's great and all, but you forgot about his dick.

Problem is that without a designated shitting street, the pajeets of KF will use the nearest one.

We’re all hopelessly addicted.

She looks like Zorg from 5th Element if he did TRT, good lord

 

[Meat Target]

AnimeSucksCopeAndSneed on suicide watch as his fat pizza dragons start shilling Ozempic and Gas-X.

 

[DickMain]

Kid: "I killed my parents for Luigi's sake."
Investigator: "Mangione?"
Kid: "No thanks I just ate."

 

[RomanianSchizo]

We also have the Goy Beam Weapon that will make you bleed out of your butthole while writhing on the ground in the worst pain of your life.

it'd be like some guy "Anime? I don't watch that, that's for losers" knowing his Sub Rips of "I Isekiaed into a World where you power up by gooning" are buried deep in his Homework folder.

These niggers wanna be oppressed so badly, it's gotta be a fetish.

 

[Testacles Maximus]

Why are you assholes so Puritancal? I mean i love watching men pissy pissy. Nothing wrong with the boys complimenting each others penises and their urination skills!

 

[Hitman One]

You don't fuck for an hour? Amatuer.

That would interfere with my rigorous posting schedule.

 

[Super Mario Brothers]

They were like the autistic Sonic the Hedgehog Fandom of the late antique Mediterranean religious world.

 

[REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!]

He’s a brave man, he doesn’t care if they shoot him in the face, just so long as they keep it out of his eyes and hair.

 

[I Do Not Post]

Would gay sex be considered the bitcoin of sex? Unlawful exchange of currency in the world of sexual exchanges? Self-regulated supply completely unoccupied and unregulated by the women?

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

A janny demanding respect from anyone is like a literal turd claiming it identifies as a chocolate cake.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

I bet the transitcucks would change their tune and feel right at home if Buc-ee's stops cleaning their bathrooms altogether and lets junkies take over half the lot and turn it into an open air drug market.

I didn't exist during the jurassic era and yet I miss the Dinosaurs.

Begun, the reign of the wolf fucker has.

New favorite JAV title:

Bumping into my wife secretly wearing our daughter’s discarded school uniform, her embarrassed look in the ill-fitting plump bobbed style was so erotically cute that I reverted to student mode after over a decade and fucked her nonstop, Arioka Miu​

Chubby Nerdy Girl Shaves With a Scarily Lit Giallo Razor and Paints Herself Gold So a Ghost With a Very Specific Fetish Will Fuck Her a Second Time.

"There are two kinds of school uniforms for Japanese girls - they are either designed by someone who hates girls and wants them to look at ugly as possible, or they are designed by pedophiles."

 

[Aunt Carol]

I disagree when the assessment said I would carve my name into a prostitute.

Fuck this bullshit. It's completely rigged. It just called me autistic for no reason at all. What a bunch of evil niggers.

And then it called me schizophrenic. Fuck this!

NoPENILEPENETRATIONOFMANASS

Her take was especially othering to neurodivergents whose special interest happens to be securing an existence for their people and a future for white children.