random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Dr. Butt]

I'm not a statistician, a psychiatrist, or even a scientist at all (I'm just some random asshole)

 

[Rozzy]

I don't have a diaper fetish!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hate it when I accidentally piss or shit myself, who tf would enjoy such a thing‽

 

[Black Man Underwear]

@wry wrangler

ugh
i just took a shit and now my anus is bleeding

@Gangstalker #32194

remember what they told you in prison, youve got to relax

@Gangstalker #32194

do you ever worry about being a bad influence on people

 

[Rozzy]

I went outside for the park and to fetch my mail today, I go outside. And I haven't shat myself this year, only had a piss incident at the beginning of the month.

 

[eatler]

PS: if you estimate your country based on consumerism you're a nigger

There is no magic.
Nobody will save you.
You are alone.
The tribe is all you have, and you reject it.

Tell me where the black man at Walmart touched you

 

[rubytintedchix]

This is like bitching you booked Andy Dick and he showed up late, drunk, and sexually assaulted a security guard.

 

[frozen_runner]

@Styxhexenhammer666 Tarl, Fox News aren't going to employ you.

Take your shirt off and talk about the occult. Summon demons on camera. Do trip reports again. Do pissed on red wine in the afternoon reports. Do the Garden. Film with a worse camera so it looks all grainy and authentic. Talk about the holocaust again. Do more Bowie covers. Shag more groupies. Talk extensively about your love for Charles Manson.

Troons are going to milk chestfeed this for all its worth.

Someone bogosorted the progressive stack again.

I'm drunk, old, half native-american, and gay. Fight me.

Trains cause autism. The people that told you vaccines cause autism were lying.

Perhaps they tried to [kill Trump], but Doctor Pepper stopped COVID from killing him.

If I got paid for shitposting I'd make George Soros look like a poorfag

Rothschild's grave is the only gender neutral bathroom I support.

the CIA is responsible for every death

 

[Waifu Days]

The Technodrome

That's all

 

[POWER IN MISERY]

>whitest bbc porn addict

* Your Mom
* Hillary Clinton
* Kamala Harris

 

[John Andrews Stan]

three people got really gay and tried to dox one of us for saying that furries should be systematically killed

 

[Black Man Underwear]

@SandyHooker

Because of how big everything is and time dialation

@Black Man Underwear

time dilation
does time cope and seethe too?

@Muttley

space is a tranny

 

[Pee Cola]

If you live in fear of someone reposting your own idiocy back at you, you probably didn't deserve life in the first place.

 

[NaggotFigger]

Arguably, the cow is certainly more attractive than most of the women there. I'd imagine it will catch on.

Big Doe eyes, smooth complexion, generous tongue and lips, soft mooing, quite type, well defined legs - big udder....I'm getting turned on now.

 

[Black Man Underwear]

@SandyHooker

And now any time I am out fishing I insist that whoever is with me has to kiss the fish if its their first time.

I never feel depressed when I fish.

@Scarlett Johansson

Where's barbie oh shes in the ass

@Black Man Underwear

@SiccDicc, I AM GOING TO SPLURGE MY HOT THICK CUM ALL OVER YOUR TUNA SALAD

@SiccDicc

Great, now I have to give this to the homeless.

@MarqueeIsAFunnyWord

Fuck a tuna? Oh hey it's like that one hatsune miku picture

@SandyHooker

There is a woman that actually stuffed a handful of maggots into her pussy.

@SleepingBull

Everything in that general region falls under the same general category of "why".

 

[Myrtle the Turtle]

What part of sperging about whether or not Hitler had oil constitutes a "deep thought" rather than a debate?

 

[Tablet County]

I follow this girl on YouTube but I'm a little peeved that she isn't diabetic or morbidly obese.

It's a turd.... it's a shame... no.... it's SUPERFAT!


His kryptonite is employment.

The USA has more niggers but the EU is way fucking gayer.

Which is the lesser evil?

YOU decide.

We need to force programmers into learning on 80's machines with 64k until they can account for every damn byte.
You need more? Learn assembly language. Still need more? Here's a fucking cassette drive you useless faggot.

 

[Pedophobe]

God's Sanest Tumblr user meets God's Most Professional Tech CEO

@The Backwards Man
Do NOT say the nigger word on my page.

I wish all my stalker children a million dollars!

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

I saw a rainbow yesterday, it made me happy till I remembered what it's associated with today.

Shes fine with anything if she feels it hurts Men. Even mutilating little girls.

Plus they know how to have fun. Sure it's a little gross, but it's still fun.

 

[Spud]

If by estrogen you mean a hard throbbing dick, then yes.

 

[Gog & Magog]

Got sharted on during a 69. An incident that I referred to forever after as "the showstopper".