random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Meat Target]

Wratchetness is not a necessary quality for a chimpout, but its absence does impede scoring in certain scenarios such as public transit.

If you wish to petition a review by this committee, please go fuck yourself.

 

[Skitarii]

I get more attention from gay dudes than from women

 

[Pedophobe]

Well in that case nevermind, posting a picture of a bottle between your bare ass cheeks to strangers on the internet is totally normal and dignified.

Pigga this aint a war. This is a fucking lolocaust. And the jew, is you.

...or go back to digg

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

It's Invasion of the Body Snatchers, but with niggers.

 

[Tablet County]

A twink crossed with Ultraman.

An Ultratwink, if you will.

At this rate, Melania's going to have to go back to turning tricks to help pay for all this.

Not necessarily. Trump could start an OnlyFans.

It’s like trying to watch an aborigine tell a joke, and then he hefts a half-empty bottle of denatured alcohol and gives you a toothless grin and says, “I am the joke.”

finally, i've always wanted more black gay men in my strip clubs

straight is a size? is this person trying to say that being a fatass is inherently queer?

... based...?

View attachment 5766393

Didn't this guy lose like eight straight fights to a bed?

 

[Spud]

There is no big secret. There is no grand Illuminatical conspiracy. It's just jews

 

[The Punished Mitch]

He is possibly using his limited company to purchase latex fetishwear to avoid paying tax on his Patreon income.

 

[glass_houses]

Sunk cost phallusy

 

[Pedophobe]

Autism speaks and I wish it didn't.

EDIT: FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK THEY ARE DOING THE CORPORATE THINKING HAT DISCUSSION USING IT I AM SO FUCKED

Lurk Moar, Faggot

 

[Poonocchio]

He is fond of calling people retards, and as we know retards are not only a protected class, but President of the United States.

 

[Haloperidol]

"Yo watch me rip my dick off with a pair of pliers in the name of veganism"
"That's retarded dude"
"Actually I'm just braver than you"

 

[frozen_runner]

"Fat American cat ladies are offended by your grammar, please change your entire language to stop triggering them."

I am reporting most of you for bullying

My latinx ex worked at spacex and x.

I'm usually pretty anti-abortion, but I can understand killing a child before they have the misfortune of being born French.

How do I get a mentally stunted Disney adult bbw to hug me (and possibly have sex with) without becoming a furry?

edit: they look Jewish nvm

If that bitchs skin was any more oily the Americans would invade her.

 

[Gentlebastard]

Hallucinating entire organs and structures is totally something that you see in people who are mentally stable. I'll never forgive that prick Ronald Reagan for closing the asylums.

“Some African bitch?” Damn, son. Just say “nigger,” get it out in the open.

As an acoustic lebanese wiman, I can relate.

So finished my wagie stretch, went to have a shower and microwave some leftovers, after finishing my shower and meal I came back to the screen and fat is STIL FUCKING OINKING EVERY 6 SECONDS JESUS CHRIST WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU

It's like telling me the canoe my family is on is sinking, and asking me which of my kids I would not save! I can't choose who will die!!

But the answer is the fat one.

What's a little eardrum blowing audible rape among friends?

That is one dry looking dick, yikes.

 

[OvercookedBacon]

EDIT: God damn, anybody else notice that teddy bear’s fat pussy?

 

[eatler]

This ain't Twitter or Reddit, you lunatic.
This is slapfight extravaganza extraordinaire.
Match up or off to the kitchen.

 

[Aunt Carol]

You don't just like houseplants, you ARE a houseplant and also want to fuck them.

 

[skunt]

PUT THE ESTROGEN IN THE BAG AND NO ONE GETS HURT!

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

And you "don't care" about it, because caring about a 15 year old girl's breasts would be a "weird" thing to care about. Weird in what way?

 

[Spud]

You've been sent by the shoe Jews to minimize the damage modern shoes are doing to us.

 

[Blobby's Murder Knife]

If you have tapeworms but are still morbidly obese, you might be a lolcow.