random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Tablet County]

Sorry what? When the fuck was his dick on the news?

Do me a favor an dont make text smaller next time, I got retard eyes and that shit made em hurt

whimsical forced buggery fantasies

 

[Uncle Buck]

The big problem is that kids are raised by iphones with absent parents. No father = giggly goonclowns. It will only get worse.

 

[AltisticRight]

Interesting new matter of public record attached.

 

[Tablet County]

After Star War was a hit, he made Empire Strikes Back. It was so awesome because other people made it for him. Then he was so mad he crashed his golf cart into a lake.

 

[KiwiFuzz2]

Was allegedly ‘helicoptering his penis’ at people in a cemetery​

 

[Tablet County]

This causes a feeling of fear, and the subsequent picturing of toilet germs crawling up the urethra like Hitler marching on Poland.

If they really want to hammer home how much drugs will fuck you up, they just need to record a PSA of Ozzy Osbourne trying to speak coherently for two minutes straight.

'beam me up, daddy'

So you do have a father, please show me where on the doll he told you that you were a dissapointment to him and your mother.

 

[thhrang]

I am sorry to inform you but I have never posted bizarre fetish pictures of the bottom of my feet and I do not have a WikiFeet account and that I do not post about vtuber feet. I'm not sure where this confusion arose but I'm happy to clarify.

 

[AnimeSucksCopeAndSneed]

"...the disarming appearance of the avatar and the fact that it is not a real person helps a certain subset of viewers connect more readily than they would to a streamer who presented as a real person. The "cute" mannerisms and general childlike features of the avatar provoke a sympathetic response on a subconscious level which helps to accelerate the parasocial bonding viewers often have with their preferred streamer, and the anime styling has an immediate appeal to viewers who already prefer anime over live action media. This familiarity and bonding effect lowers the barrier to spending compared to a "regular" streamer. Finally, the uwu baby voice used to respond to financial contributions entices spergs to spend extra and often."

"What's that? A lot of her viewers are pedos? Who gives a shit? Their money spends just as well as anyone else's and there isn't even a kid involved in this shit anyway!"

 

[Aunt Carol]

Ostrich Gang! Ostrich Gang! Ostrich Gang!

 

[Sawamura Simp]

An Australian senator has asked for the deportation of Tenacious D after their comments on the Trump assassination

I looked into it again and @Some Dumb Faggot brought up the statistica stats for 2023 and @George Floyd Sneed brought up FRED's Labor Force Participation rate,

My CWCville sources state that Magichan and Mewtoo were behind it

Is this schizophrenia or is there literature on this?

There are more if I need to dredge them up. Um ackshually me and I'll fucking bury you in archive links.

I only made an account to view the thread. Lurker discrimination must cease.

WE ARE SO FUCKING BACK LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. AMOUNTS OF WINNING THAT HAVE NEVER BEEN SEEN BEFORE.

Please, God, let Destiny get the knock and enjoy prison like the stalkerchild he is.

Can America stop for a day so I can catch up in this thread.

Now, remember, everything was in chaos and you couldn't depend on the news, you had to hit the Farms or Twitter.

 

[BirdUp]

The NCR, like Biden's America, is a tired oligarchy with democratic trappings, feebly clinging to its waning possessions and credibility.

 

[JustSomeDong]

These faggots make me more pro-Israel than I ever wanted to be….privileged faggot woke whites literally ruin everything now, I can’t even hate the Jews anymore! First it was Marvel now it’s the Jews…. What more can they take from us!

 

[Xarpho's Return]

I tried pronouncing this and now all the furniture is floating around my house.

 

[Fireman Sam]

I remember going undercover back in the day to find out what women go through. I discovered that women are called faggot a lot.

Idk why but this would be a funny out of context addition

 

[Rotollo 2]

Trannies calling anyone an incel is the most ironic thing in the world.
View attachment 6230493

"This is a serial Kiwi Farms incel."

 

[Gentlebastard]

COOL FACT: the category 'people with vulvas' technically includes Ed Gein!

Have to say though, it is kind of wholesome how he still loves his wife in the "put on dirty clothes and I will take you to pound town from dusk till dawn" way.

With lolcows, never ascribe to self-delusion what can be explained by pure stupidity.

I'll give this website credit: we seem to be the only ones who really have a blanket standard against everything bad.

"I know you are but what am I" levels of playground banter

I would say that he's a useful idiot but we all know that first part isn't true.

he may be English, but at least he's not French

Pedo: Hello, fine young child victim, I am going to groom you now because I am a PEDOPHILE

Child: OH NO I HAVE BEEN GROOMED

I can't believe they fired me today, its only 95 days from Christmas! How dare they!

You know its bad when even the canadian speaks up

Wow it's almost like we were right all along! No wait.... that's transphobic because we're Kiwi Farms....

I have no idea why some people still don't get this.

Of course no one wants to give the Farms credit because 1) we're right, and that shatters the illusion that we're just an ebil harassment site, and 2) let's face it, we're not the most normie-friendly source, and like it, or not, that turns a lot of people off.

It sucks, but it is what it is.

Claims he is a civilized human and refuses to use the word nigger even though the version on his site says nigger uncensored. Make it make sense

Honestly dont think any quip I make can add to the hilarity of this so imma let it stand by itself....

If you're afraid of cringe, why are you in this thread?

Funny you mention this, Liberia DOES have a recent history of Cannibalism

Thank Jesus, Joseph and Mary. Maybe someone will steal the baby, one can hope.

 

[Blackhole]

"I do declare, these foids be squawking! I shall return when you show my doomsday pedo sex cult THE PROPER DEFERENCE."

 

[Syzyg]

I lied and said there was CP on her discord, pretty fucked up lol i must admit but hes a grown woman who told everyone a 17 year old girl (gezebelle) raped someone

 

[Seafarer]

I for one cannot wait for all the pseudo-intellectual video essays about how Skibidi Toilet: the movie is secretly about late stage capitalism and realistic depictions of panic attacks.

 

[Thé au lait]

Outside of Patrick Star threatening to feed someone their testicles that movie kind of sucks ass.