random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[30+GameOvers]

Air Jordan shoes were designed by three white guys and have led to more black deaths than the slave trade, KKK, and crack combined.

 

[Almighty Space Duck]

But raise a glass to him sometime. Even go one better and make it a combo, put two things together that no-one in their right mind would wanna drink, that's what Josh would do.

 

[Gentlebastard]

I couldn't decide if it was semi-serious or a shitpost, and I abandoned it.

The true, learned racist knows that the deepest cutting slur for any asian is calling them a countryman of the country their country hates. Like calling a Cambodian a Vietnamese.

You get an achievement if you can goad a Japanese guy a Korean guy and a Chinaman into fighting eachother while they forget that you're the one that provoked the incident.

Been a while since I tuned in here, but Jesus this son of a bitch infuriates me.

If you aren't remotely accessing PCs you have set up around the world can you even call yourself a troll?

They somehow turned the "DUDE i just LOVE the hustle and bustle of the big city" copypasta into visual format.

That’s the most sci-fi thing he’s ever done - been so notable for being an abrasive asshole that a small but dedicated team of weirdos mimic his posting style to make fun of him.

It really is incredible. Never have I seen someone with such insane levels of unwarranted self-importance.

I got to give it to the fat retard, he follows his racism to a comical degree.

Just...just imagine waking up to this very scene with no explanation. I come tonight to entertain your nightmares. This fucking CREATURE that will one day birth the actual Antichrist is courtesy of your tax dollars. It funny but I also wish to die.

"Um actually, I didn't commit any of those sins... it was just an honest mistake. God even admitted that I was innocent. And when you think about it, it's really His fault for creating sin in the first place. But yet somehow I am the damned one."

Jesus himself would kill Jack with his bare hands within minutes of meeting him.

 

[Clotso Coof]

"Some of these stones are hundreds of years old"
That's certainly one of the quotes of all time.

 

[Jaded Optimist]

I saw a black woman the other day that was more attractive than Anisa and I'm a fucking racist.

 

[CaddestSlown]

I hope you can expound upon your curse once George Washington puts in a good word to Jesus to free you from it.

 

[KiwiFuzz2]

Stop the presses. These hepcats are using slang, daddy-o.

Oh well, if my sleep paralasys demon and the cyber autist than maybe i won't tell the wsj to gargle bleach.

"spider lips in the genital area"

Hopefully this is as fake and gay as 9/11 and "The Holocaust".

 

[Testiculated Giraffe]

Ian isn’t going to 41%, he’ll shit himself to death like a hamster.

 

[Aunt Carol]

Hating Jack is a byproduct of having a functioning internal monologue - Most people can be observed only barely tolerating him, and Jesus himself would kill Jack with his bare hands within minutes of meeting him.

 

[Slideshow Bill]

I've met six people from Maine in my life and they were all molested as kids. Nothing else to do up there besides lobster fishing and diddling kids.

 

[Toji Suzuhara]

You had like a 25% chance of being a Pajeet and God said "That boy's too good for that" and made you literally anything else.

Never kill yourselves.

 

[Speedrunner]

No no, keep going. What about the fart gassy memes did you find so funny?

 

[PhoBingas]

I hate to see what Ozempic penis looks like after reading this article.

 

[306h4Ge5eJUJ]

hi my name is Roman and I have something to confess here you see i unfortunately have autism and

 

[Vygode]

"gen beta are either going to reach age 20 without ever experiencing arousal or theyre going to be crashing flying cenobite fuck buses into the world goon center on the daily because feeling their flesh melting is the only thing thatll get them off anymore"

Found on X

 

[Harvey Danger]

Don't rape anybody, they don't like that.

(Advice from the superchats segment of Aug 22, 2025 MATI)

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

This nigger's just spent $1500 to ensure he can continue to whine about Kiwifarms in court and by God the man is going to continue to fucking whine.

 

[Speedrunner]

You suck nigger dick, so something more depraved than that.

Surely you guys have something more creative to say besides "You were BLACKED"

 

[supremeautismo]

They should all be drowned in the most pungent cauldron of curry.

 

[Gentlebastard]

It's like turning over a rock to find weird bugs underneath.

He shall live on forevermore as a barely animated tub of lard mocked and hated by everybody.

They should all be drowned in the most pungent cauldron of curry.

Do you guys have to glue the yalmulke thing on or does it attach like a suction cup?

It's OK to be weird as shit. We're all weird as shit about something.

That's what Outer Darkness is for. No God, no Satan, no angels, no demons, no saved souls, no damned souls...just Russhole, all alone, in complete darkness and silence...for all eternity.