random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Dr. Butt]

would rather shove rabid weasels up her uterus than admit that she's a never-was, a shit mother, a fake queer, and a fat useless whore who farts on cakes to make a living.

 

[KiwiFuzz2]

He keeps bringing up how they have to draw lots. At this point just budget in a second helicopter.

The worst part of this is the hypocrisy, well that and the child molestation

The problem is Americans are violent, mentally ill psychos. That's why we run the world.

I don't have a link, but you should be able to find The Theory of Evolution pretty easily.

 

[invisibult plus+]

Yes hello good sirs, I'm here in regards to acquiring a whole animal for meat.

I'd like to inquire as to how much it might cost, or how much freezer room one might expect it to take up. Am I to take the carcass to a butcher, or should I have one of my manor servants butcher it?

Kindest regards,
Sir Reginald Helmsley

 

[Drip Torch]

i'm the reincarnation of adolf hitler

 

[Big Nasty]

Watching any Fishtank related stream is boring unless they get flat out drunk, CK is on screen, or Cole drinking beers at 5AM in a ski mask.

8 gay homo niggers are all told they are on a show for hood niggas, and they win $20k if they make it to the end without anyone finding out they're gay.

 

[neger psykolog]

Imagine being in a thread about an unusually tall homosexual black man who recorded his own suicide and still somehow ending up as being the bigger overdramatic gay nigger between you and him. That takes alot of effort.

 

[Vinluv Handesbukia]

BECAUSE I'M THAT YEAST!
I'M THE STUFF THAT MAKES IT RISE!

 

[Uh Oh Stinky]

Your account is 12 years old. I'm sure you have plenty of diagnosable conditions.

Actually your rewrite killed him you stupid fucking Chud.

i like to imagine joe is explaining this to god when he reaches the gates and it's a 50-minute exposition on how to suck his dick

 

[Pube Dandruff]

[On the subject of pooners] Is dysphoria just reality cock-slapping them in the face?

 

[Rick The Stick]

"I thought on one the early episodes he was convicted of rape, (I believe his victim was jiggly-puff), and he was going to be banished, until he ended up saving Ash's life in the end from Team Rocket. After that, everyone forgave Pikachu, and from there on, it was like it never took place. Am I remembering this correctly?"

 

[Pedophobe]

I only drink 100% natural Cambodian breast milk personally

Alan Turing invented computers to look at gay porn. If he knew people were using them to argue with women about politics, he'd be spinning in his grave.

SSRI's are a hell of a drug.

 

[Gentlebastard]

At 1:45 you can briefly see him packing a cord into his bag, likely the legendary USB cable, the existence of which has been much disputed.

The last time I saw someone read a book on the train, it was a fat woman reading female erotica while picking her nose.

Imagine being both dyslexic and a gooner. And worst of all you're listening to Korn.

My current daily carry, soppresata, calabrese salami, toasted sliced demi-baguette.

In therapist speak I'm sure that was a polite way of saying they were the most easily offended and stubborn patient they've ever had.

Damn, the pokéfuckers are at it again. It all started with the Vaporeon copypasta of 2018.

If KiwiFarms will teach you anything, it is that the American legal system looks more like Willy Wonka's factory than anything.

 

[The Lаughing Man]

If Jersh was a tranny I would become a chaser.

 

[LargeChoonger]

Two straight men pretending to be lesbian women while having gay sex will never not be funny to me.

 

[Doxmatix]

NOBODY IS TRYING TO FUCK YOU.

There are online games where the fucking pools are accessible and everyone is getting AIDs.

Leave a legacy of impact and retardation. Nobody is going to remember this gay movie but nobody forgets GOATSE.

I wouldn't even have had time to transition, if amber was abusing me till I rubix cubed her pussy I'd kill myself. Angry room temperature tuna sandwitch pussy

 

[Aunt Carol]

Any animal can be a cat if you're blind or schizophrenic enough!

 

[often puzzled]

Is there a dandruff mod, or one for mouthbreathing + insomnia?

Yeah but next thing you know you’re trapped in a 1x1 room while she watches you piss on the floor.

 

[JustSomeDong]

My Great Uncles were literal Nazi's and they loved me.

 

[Black Man Underwear]

expect a lot of young porn watching men to jerk off in solidarity with weapons

 

[Law]

Get some punk in this cyber you motherfucker!