random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Gog & Magog]

Schools were still functional so you could just go to class and learn enough without meaningfully studying to get good marks. I was never in danger and the idea of a teacher trying to indoctrinate me into anything other than milktoast civic nationalism would have sounded absurd.

 

[JustSomeDong]

It's hard to keep track of what kitchen utensils mental retards have been raped with.

 

[Dr. Butt]

Innocent people should not be made to to know if I'm circumcised or not

 

[Party Hat Wurmple]

missionaries now aware of my autism and one of them gave me a bible verse about it 🫩

oh great im on the part of my period where I’m productive but my pussy smells like rotting meat

 

[corvuscorax]

Eat your shame, you retard.

 

[Dr. Butt]

It's always "transgender illegal alien gets sweeheart plea deal in rape of 14-year-old boy" and never "14-year-old alien boy gets plea deal in rape of illegal transgender sweetheart"

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

chrisdumb westdumb dumbler is a julaaayyyy nigger

"I've been expecting you, Mr. Fong-Jones"

If you're going to visually assault me with a man's arse, at least make it a decent one.

Extremely ugly, exceptionally hairy asshole with visible testicles.

The last thing an Optimus Prime toy sees before it gets turned into a dilator

"I am a robot alien baby who can only speak through a telepathic bird. Alien robot babies are blind and so am I so I can't leave. Let me just rain dolla-dollla bills on your dinner."

 

[Mister Eveready]

We know, we just think it's funny.

 

[Harm]

This could imply that the furfag resorts to prostitution, viewing the diapers as a business expense.

 

[Party Hat Wurmple]

I want null to feed me.

 

[30+GameOvers]

My favorite DM moment was when someone got drunk and videotaped herself shoving a toothbrush up her asshole.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

Got excited for the doxing of vulnerable populations, deflated by whatever the hell neural network generated hypothetical queer stories w/ anonymous location-based comments is supposed to mean.

Can we just make them wear armbands for identification and easy avoidance?

the internet promotes faggotry too much and for this cardinal sin it ought to be destroyed

i'm happy to report that there are zero homos in sneedville

Guess you could say im fixin' to go for a dovahatty vibe but with soyslop.

Is scratching your balls a sacred act? Because you do that with your bare, unwashed hands too.

LGTBQIAPP+ sounds like a gay wi-fi password

I mean, how many different ways can you watch genitals slap together?

You would be surprised at how novel people are with their genitals.

i prefer a faithful wife and not a wanton whore

Fuck twitter at this point every post and comment is from a jeet or a nigger.

I wouldn't even rape you *smuckles*

Even boomer shows, despite being the precursor of future edgelords, knew what Hell was and who went there.

Mainstream porn had seriously nosedived in terms of quality for lack of a better word.

Uh, when I was posting in this thread, I was going through a very difficult time in my life, but laughing at these retards made me feel better about myself.

stop watching porn and go to an escort. you will stop giving and money to the jews and will help a SEX WORKER.

Enemies Jeets have made
- Whites
- Blacks
- Asians
- Hispanics
- Women dating
- Men that have to deal with them
- Truckers
- Online Gamers
- Simpsons Fans
- Children
- Tigers (look it up)
- Monkeys (look it up)
- Sri Lankans (Different flavor of jeet that is still a jeet but hates normal jeets)
- Pakistanis (Different flavor of jeet that is still a jeet but hates normal jeets)
- Canadians
- Americans
- People against child marriage
- People that care about the environment
- Tech Industry Workers
- Fastfood & Restaurant workers
- Fastfood & Restaurant patrons
- Home renters
- Neighbors
- People that own phones
- Old people
- Trains (How could I forget?)
- Weebs

Holy hell, took your lazy nigger ass long enough. And right after it loses relevance!!

I always dread that Anime isn’t like how I remember in the 80s where it was all buff dudes blasting niggers and hot 42 year old milfs with perms.

The cartoon avatar people of the Farms are having a gang turf war or something idk

Toji dindu nuffin. Allah shall strike off the heads of all who say otherwise.

I don't get why people act surprised there a lot of strange people that post here, we're on fucking kiwifarms what the fuck do you expect? The site is focused around weird retards on the internet, of course it's going to attract weird retards who sperg out and be retarded.

One of the most defining parts of Old Internet websites like our own is the congealed autism that keeps its userbase coming back. However much like any herd of animals or grove of trees, you occasionally get a mutation of some kind - The tree grows too tall or its fruit ripen too quick, a cow's born with albinism. It's as important here to cull those autistic mutations, no matter how important they are to the grove(or in this case the website).

Every aspect of this website, from its topics of discussion to its very userbase, is a case study in leading horses to water.

You're ruining the Internet.

 

[Random Internet Person]

If being autistic and retarded is bannable then holy fuck just take a sledgehammer to the servers at that point.

 

[Premium Gonzo]

@Fart Finger Joseph

 

[Evil Whitey]

"My floor brand floor wasn't dropshitted, I did brown-label my cargo shorts though."

 

[SNEED.EXE]

Jeremy has had diarrhea nonstop for most of his adult life

I think the only reasonable explanation is they had a conversation behind the scenes where she demanded he stop telling her about his diarrhea on air.

Really Jer you almost shit on the floor this morning? You didn't almost shit in your pants though? Was there perhaps something between your asshole and the floor that caught the diarrhea and prevented you shitting on the floor? This is another case of Jeremy using weasel words.

 

[The Cheese Aisle]

YOUR NEGRATES MEAN NOTHING TO ME! I'VE SEEN WHAT MAKES YOU WINNER!

 

[Spectate]

I been in many roleplay discord servers and roleplay servers

 

[assigned Karen at birth]

Can you really say you have a tradwife if she's never attempted to stab you to death?

Moid, femoid, greekoid, islamoid, peepeepoopoo-oid,
Try switching the "oids" for some 'roids and hit the gym, faggots.

"but what if a meteor was about to strike earth and the only way to stop it was to do poopoo homosex what then chud?????"

I'm just glad to see that no lessons have been learned.

I'm autistic about certain things sometimes but I have no official diagnoses.
And I really don't think I'm autistic.

Hitler called them "honorary Aryans". That's good enough for me.

"What the fuck makes a sex doll ille...oh."

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

Rest in peace icarus, his pants flew off too close to the sun.

gooner money buys just as many goldbelly pies

QA, aka the shitspigot board where apparently acceptable discourse includes a pink cupcake user routinely asking people about who and where they have urinated themselves in front of others

Toji also liked to actually roleplay as Toji.