random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[keyboredsm4shthe2nd]

Niggerkike is my preferred pronoun. Also I am hard of hearing so make sure you say it very loudly each time you refer to me.

 

[NyQuilninja]

A bear on the tranch is better than an amhole in the house.

Confucius

 

[KiwiFuzz]

If you see padded pews or people kneeling or playing tambourines GTFO quick.

 

[Daddy's Little Kitten]

So there I was, minding my own straight business and balls deep in the sweet ass of the chap I just met at the sportsbar and I realize this faggot is gay! In my rage I strangled him to death while coming harder than I ever had before. Please acquit!

 

[KiwiFuzz]

Personally, if I had the Unabomber as a relative, I wouldn't have turned him in.

 

[keyboredsm4shthe2nd]

Being a troon is a choice. No one forced you to cut your dick off and call yourself Barbara.

I really can't imagine anything more disturbing than an old man body with big ol porn titties on it. It would be like a rotten fish carcass with a chocolate in the middle. No matter how good that chocolate is, you aint gonna want it.

 

[Pee Cola]

Pronouns are the anime avatars of the Left.

 

[like_shutup_&_drive_scoob]

Is Jack Dorsey hiding a peanut in his skinny jeans? It would explain a lot.

 

[Antipathy]

Didn't have to read past the headline to know why this garlic-munching crypto-jew nigger can't wrap his head around the idea on why the sky isn't falling:

Nope. Pronouns in bios are the best way to immediately recognize mentally unstable people you do not want to interact with.
Pronouns are the anime avatars of the Left.

I'm sure it was better than now, people accuse me of too much nostalgia but the past was simply better, that's all there is to it, people get defensive and give me shit because it's a tough pill to swallow and I get that, but it's still true.

 

[KiwiFuzz]

the only side effect of a large heart is understanding the true meaning of christmas

 

[Antipathy]

So now the pillow is covered in grease as well as his jizz.

At this point I think the UN Declaration of human rights need to be scrapped and thrown in the dustbin.

 

[NyQuilninja]

My God I swear I have houseplants that are smarter than Lou.

Courtesy of pol
>Well Mr. your blood pressure is 260/180, 90% blocked arteries and an enlarged heart.
>We also fount fent, meth and several other drugs in your system along with a gallon of semen in your digestive tract.
>No no treatment is necessary, just avoid the police and you will live a long healthy life.

 

[Mal0]

I'm starting to think this whole trans thing is some kind of coordinated attack against the blind.

 

[Useful_Mistake]

"I honestly feel really bad for her. Sure, she may be a bit entitled, but that does not compare to the amount of harassment she has received, which also brought Kiwi Farms to our world."

"Me: I don't watch the news anymore, when something big happens Kiwi Farms usually gets to the truth of it the fastest. My mom: Oh cool, I'll check it out. Me: Wait"

"isn't kiwi\\farms basically just 4chan....I've literally seen full threads of them advocating for g3noc!de and calling people slurs for just existing"

"LOL, dude I'd trust kiwifarms with my autistic 12 year old child than I would kero with my dog dude at least they'd just bully my kid"

"Honestly, one of the things I regret so much that i did when I was younger was read on a drama site called Kiwifarms it fucked up my views on gender/sexuality for like- a long time"

 

[Antipathy]

If he wasn't a cardiologist, he'd probably be working for the school board, trying to inject your son with estrogen.

He had an outstanding felony disorderly conduct

Women ruinig everything is always relevant

Seriously, why can't people like this just off themselves? I truly feel nothing but disgust and hatred for people like this. If you're so worthless and unworthy just dive into some concrete from 30 feet, tired of hearing about your aggrandizing moralizations for your cuckoldry.

 

[Meat Target]

Don't say it with a hard R, thats our word

the unoffensive versiona is 'Gama'

 

[NyQuilninja]

why do black people have the weirdest and dumbest names????

THIS ISTHEBESTTRIALIHAVEEVERSEEN!

"Child molestation prevention"... how exactly do you do that? Just don't molest children, and kill anyone who does.

maybe its a good thing all the trannies are taking women jobs

I don't want the smell of melting dilators on my s'mores.

In America, the criminals are plentiful and the cops are incompetent.

Only takes one flaming Alpaca to get loose to the neighbors.

anyone who uses twitter isn't human

 

[keyboredsm4shthe2nd]

You cut a slit at the base of the scrotes under the penile shaft, pop them out, and sew it up. If the patient REALLY wanted, it can be done with local anaesthesia. Understandably, this option is unpopular.

 

[NyQuilninja]

The point is to INJECT yourself with SCIENCE juice, because I FUCKING LOVE SCIENCE!

 

[Hollywood Hitler]

Please make this a random.txt
Best thing I've read on this site:

Good thing nobody reads the root except CatParty and the rest of A&H.

Stahp! You're making my pants tight! <3