random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Newman's Lovechild]

I own 5 copies of Psycho on bluray. Am I part of a cult also?

 

[Epic Fail Man]

@Dude Weed moment.

 

[Particle Bored]

"Security Officers Traba and Swann appeared to be attempting to speak with Werner but he continually yelled and screamed things about needing love, women, and hating being alone. Werner would repeatedly yell that he loved Gen Zer's and AOC, stating he supported the left and deserved love."

"I asked how he was doing and what he needed from our Security Team. Werner stated he was 40 and single and that he needed a relationship."

credit to @Huge Fungus

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/lucas-werner.17234/page-1544#post-9511568

 

[NyQuilninja]

did she unironically blame the venue instead of her cock addiction?

The Parker Brothers killed more natives than the Pilgrims DONT QUOTE ME ON THIS

Not in my book.

Love me some albino ladies.

Ghost pussy: it's fucking perfect.

I really appreciate how true to life it is. A fat dumpy loser in a faded black shirt and a gross twink that doesn't know how to dress himself.

 

[Childe]

>betray God and be remembered forever as a backstabbing bitch
>kill yourself like some fucking tranny
>2000 years later get drawn as a nigger by an obese manchild

 

[Aunt Carol]

Nice thanks for the info definitely got to read more on this jackass and his horrifying ass

 

[Kill a Troon for Pikamee]

Just say nigger. Don’t call it the N Word.

 

[NyQuilninja]

I was watching a free with ads video on Prime the other day and literally every single ad was niggers.

Correct. Fuck niggers. Turn them into charcoal for my grill.

NIGGERS!!!!

Yes, but can the homeless still fuck it?

I’m returning to Drow society. At least their Dominatrix preistesses actually want men around.

 

[Rod Dangerous]

And secondly, I am quite sure I am asexual.

 

[Kill a Troon for Pikamee]

He didnt know he pooped out his ass

 

[NyQuilninja]

Dear G.O - H.25 and S.A:
all ya'll niggas are straight up retarded. Quit being dumb, yo.

Just what I needed! An informative TikTok on how to prevent my asshole from tearing while getting my pudding pounded.

 

[Return of the Freaker]

Why can't I do unsavory things to this snack size waifu

 

[keyboredsm4shthe2nd]

The desperate push to indoctrinate everyone with transgenderism is a thinly veiled attempt to systematically genocide my autistic brothers and sisters. Change my mind.

I'd say rest in piss, but she's an Indian so that would likely be an upgrade from resting in poo.

And the way it gets all thin at the top when it's just danglin' there, it's like a sock filled with rice glued to a wall.

 

[Meat Target]

Interviewer: "Do you have twitter?"
Interviewee: "No, that shits gay."
Interviewer: "You're hired, how does 150k a year sound?"

 

[mr.moon1488]

Thank you for the mental health evaluation, obese edgy goth anime furry cat girl troon.

 

[Ken Barlow]

Dude it's Kiwifarms, not a popularity contest. Have a Xanax.

 

[NyQuilninja]

I'd stick my dick in that crazy tbh famalama

That nigga has had three chins in the last picture

 

[KiwiFuzz]

Him, her, and the pillow tiara all in the one bed.

 

[Witthel]

He jizzes on your fupa, you get a chalupa.

Give him head, for your daily bread.

Spread those legs for deviled eggs.

Give up that hole for some pizza rolls

Give up booty for a Rooty-Tooty Fresh and Fruity

Give him a handy for some Pecan Sandies

Just the tip for some queso dip

 

[Aunt Carol]

I've been a nurse for almost 10 years now and I cannot wait to get out of healthcare altogether. It's probably better than being a prostitute though.