I'm not going to say I know better than a native, but I was in Amsterdam recently for a class/research project all about sex work and human trafficking.
Tourism in the RLD is bad, but primarily because of people who are just there for the spectacle. Crowds coming in and taking photos or being dicks to the window workers end up pushing out clients because of the impossibility of maintaining anonymity, so these workers (entirely women inc. trans women) are losing potential income bc of tourism.
Tourists are also a huge part of the city's justification for shrinking the RLD by closing windows, and the latest mayor is working on trying to shut De Wallen down entirely and moving the RLD to Zuidoost, which is a primarily low-income immigrant suburb or A'dam. The residents don't want the RLD there bc of crime risk and the fact it's most families out there, and people in the city actually interested in services won't make the trip out there, so that'd suck both for Zuidoosters and SWs.
However, the RLD isn't as rife with victims as people think and there's a lot of misinformation out there. There's basically a triple authentication system in place to make sure trafficked persons aren't being forced to work there. You have to have citizenship/legal residency, register with the government, and then check in everyday for your shift with security who check your passport and registration. If you don't have your papers, you don't work. If anyone, including other window workers, suspect you are a trafficking victim, you are not allowed to do any legal sex work ever again, even if you can prove you aren't being trafficked or forced to work (they even go overboard with this sometimes). It incredibly difficult to work in the RLD as a trafficking victim, so most times traffickers will find some other avenue to exploit their victims.
There's also strict regulations on safety: condoms are required always and there's panic buttons for every worker, everyone in De Wallen (including shops and the church there) look out for each other, and the workers have a pretty good relationship with the police which has a special unit dedicated to handling issues with the window workers. All the workers have to pay rent for their spaces, so not anyone can just walk in. During the day it's so safe there that there's even a kindergarten on the main street.
The biggest perpetrators of violence and disorder are actually tourists. The workers and shops in the RLD prioritize safety and their jobs, so very rarely will someone be selling drugs or doing anything else illegal. And of course sometimes clients get aggressive, which is why they have panic buttons.
But by and large, tourists are the problem. Like I said, just by being there they are scaring away clientele and making the window workers lose money. A lot of the time they don't even go there to eat at the restaurants or buy anything from the sex or coffee shops (for non-Dutch: the coffee shops are just weed dispensaries which is a fun fact that I love even though I don't smoke). They litter and gawk and disrespect the workers. They'll go up to the windows and steal time by making the workers think they're potential clients. Sometimes people throw drinks at the windows or otherwise be outright dicks. The biggest problem is people taking pictures, since even though this is their job, there's still a desire for privacy and security, which tourists disrespect because they want photos to show their friends back home. People in the RLD have been trying for years to get tours banned, but as of yet the city gov't hasn't made any movement to help that. The people who come just for the spectacle are killing the RLD-- and rarely will you get the spectacle you expect because at the end of the day these women are just doing their jobs. It's not that exciting. Even from the perspective of just vacationing in Amsterdam, De Wallen is really not worth a visit, regardless of the fact that tourism there is bad for the workers.
So OP, it's weird you would want to do that with your mom in the first place, but wouldn't make you an a-hole. But, if you DID go to the RLD as a tourist after reading the absolute novel of a comment I just wrote, THEN y.w.b.t.a.
Regarding your situation specifically, NTA for the convo with your mom and you're free to go by yourself if you want to and she can go do something else, but just know that if you go you are actively hurting sex workers and should either pay for services (you can even pay just to talk in their room if you want, as long as you're upfront about it) or respect the fact that those women are people, and not zoo animals to feel bad for or be ashamed of.
ETA to add: the Prostitution Information Center (PIC) is a great resource both online and irl. It was founded by a sex worker, and everyone there is super knowledgeable and often happy to talk. One of our class sessions was a round table with a PIC employee and former sex worker, and he was just incredible and not willing to put up with any bullshit. I fully recommend everyone do some learning!

ETA2 electric boogaloo: Thanks for the awards!!! My first ones ever!!!!
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