AITA for telling a lady and her daughter that my trans sister isn't the problem, that her daughter just sucks and is lazy?
Advice Needed
Apologies for formatting on mobile.
I (21F) know I'm not in the wrong for defending my sister (13f) but some of my friends tells me that I could have been more tactful about it.
For context, my sister was assigned male at birth but it was very clear early on that she was trans. Fortunately, most of our close family is very supportive of her. My mom jokingly says that it was God correcting his mistake, since I and my other younger sister were both girls. Anyways, Vikki (Name I will be using for my sister for privacy sakes) socially transitioned for the first couple years of her life before my mother got her officially diagnosed with gender dysphoria around age six. And once she was around 10, Vikki started to noticed her body was changing "in a nasty way", so my mom made sure that she got on hormone blockers as soon as possible. But she didn't actually start taking them until she was 11 unfortunately.
The reason why I'm telling you about my sister's medical history is because she joined her school's basketball team. Vikki has always made the fact that she's trans like a open secret. She'll tell people who she trusts and doesn't really care who hears. So this is where Emily (12f) probably comes in. Supposedly, she's one of the popular kids at school and barely knows Vikki. But they joined at the same time, and honestly I didn't realize until Vikki told me that. She only attended basketball practice only TWICE before the actual game (For Two weeks, they had practice on Monday, Wednesday and Friday from 3:30 to 7pm)
So the actual game comes around. Me, my younger sister and my best friend attended. Our school is playing against a nearby rival school. To fast forward through it, we lost. But it was a fun game and it was very clear that Vikki has having a great time, I think most of the other players did, except for Emily of course. She looked very flustered by the end of it and im going to be honest, she played like complete dog water. She was a literal detriment to the team and maybe even the reason why they lost but that's just my anger talking. But I guess as everyone was getting ready to leave, Emily went back to her mom and told her about Vikki being trans. So Susan, Emily's mom, goes up to coach and loudly starts complaining about Vikki. I was by the snack stand getting something to drink and they were by one of the doors that led outside, so it wasn't that far of a walk and very much in earshot with how loudly she was "talking"
I don't even want to repeat any of the stuff that she was saying about my sister but when Susan said "You allow boys on the girls team, you should win your games!", I knew I had to step in. I confronted her and ask what the hell was her problem. She asked me if I was the "boy's mother" and I told her that "I'm HER sister."
To boil it down, Susan tried to go on a tired ass tirade on me about how unfair it was that Vikki was playing basketball with girls but I had to cut her off. I told her that
- My sister barely looks different than any of the other girls on the team, and the only reason that you probably know about it is because Emily heard it from somewhere.
- My sister has been on hormones blockers since she was 11! She actually probably has a disadvantage compared to the other girls on the team.
- Your daughter is just mad that she played like ass and wants to deflex the blame. It's on Emily why she played so horribly, not my sister being transgender.
The last one really shut up Susan for a second because she was just trying to yell over me. It also shocked Emily too because she probably wasn't expecting to get called out. Of course, Emily started crying and holding her mom as Susan again yelling at me, this time accusing me of bullying her daughter and that I'm a horrible person. She even tried to lunge at me but the the coach got in between us. I just left and met up with my sisters+best friend. I gave them the rundown what had happened in the car. Anna (Middle Sister) was fuming and wanting to give Susan a piece of her mind and Dolly (Best Friend) was shocked and also mad. While Vikki was mostly quiet and only ask who's mom it was, which I said Emily's.
Mom was so mad when we told her, she sent Susan a VERY long message on Instagram. This was only a few days ago and Mom has set up a meeting with the principal about Susan and Emily.
I know I did the right thing but some of my other friends are telling me that it was unnecessary to directly yell at Emily, since her mom was doing the yelling. So AITA?
(P.S What should I do from here? My family hasn't ever been through anything like this?)
Edit 1:
I can't believe I have to make an edit this soon, but it seems like some people want to twist my words and make my mother seem like some crazy woman who forced my sister to be trans. Just to clarify, Vikki didn't socially transition UNTIL SHE WAS 6. So for the first five years of her life, there were clear signs of her being trans but she still lived as a boy before she officially diagnosed.
