Report: EA Is Remastering The ‘Mass Effect’ Trilogy At Long Last (Unconfirmed)

[Tor Lugosi]

The only good thing about ME3 is its combat relative to the previous two. The rest is complete garbage.

I think it even looks worse than ME2, which made great use of lighting and shadows and had a realistic look to it, whereas ME3 characters look like they're made out of playdough and the environments often have this fake, plastic-y look to them.

 

[I.B. Niggin]

I hate how you've spent so much time building towards the climactic showdown with the Reapers in ME3 but you spend most of the game fighting Cerberus.

Fuck that noise.

 

[The Doom Slayer]

I hate how you've spent so much time building towards the climactic showdown with the Reapers in ME3 but you spend most of the game fighting Cerberus.

Fuck that noise.

That's because Mac Walters had (and still probably has) a massive hard-on for Cerberus and had to shove them down your throat whenever possible. IIRC I think they may have even had ties to the "Andromeda Initiative", because god forbid there be anything in Mass Effect that Cerberus isn't involved in.

It also doesn't help that they went from a mysterious shadow organization in ME1 to pretty much a full-blown supervillain squad in ME3, complete with them hiring retarded weeb ninjas and plastering their team logo on their fucking coffee mugs, which is something you'd expect to see in Austin Powers or something.

 

[RA-5C Vigilante]

That's because Mac Walters had (and still probably has) a massive hard-on for Cerberus and had to shove them down your throat whenever possible. IIRC I think they may have even had ties to the "Andromeda Initiative", because god forbid there be anything in Mass Effect that Cerberus isn't involved in.

It also doesn't help that they went from a mysterious shadow organization in ME1 to pretty much a full-blown supervillain squad in ME3, complete with them hiring retarded weeb ninjas and plastering their team logo on their fucking coffee mugs, which is something you'd expect to see in Austin Powers or something.

View attachment 2229539

Its a brand thing, you know, slapping on an easily identifiable marking when you're a secret organization that denies most of its actions and wouldn't be retarded enough to slap the logo on a ship that would visit some of the most visible and important places in the galaxy.

I remember reading that the guys in charge of Bioware weren't killed by EA and were given the rope to hang themselves with. I think having a writer that fucking stupid is proof of that.

 

[Miller]

That's because Mac Walters had (and still probably has) a massive hard-on for Cerberus and had to shove them down your throat whenever possible. IIRC I think they may have even had ties to the "Andromeda Initiative", because god forbid there be anything in Mass Effect that Cerberus isn't involved in.

It also doesn't help that they went from a mysterious shadow organization in ME1 to pretty much a full-blown supervillain squad in ME3, complete with them hiring retarded weeb ninjas and plastering their team logo on their fucking coffee mugs, which is something you'd expect to see in Austin Powers or something.

View attachment 2229539

Cerberus in ME1 vs ME2 and 3 is like Section 31 in Star Trek vs the Kurtzman crap. It used to be a secret organization whose job was to get things done, then it got rewritten into a big bad villain.
As for ME:A, yes TIM is behind the whole thing. Then again, nothing make sense in ME:Andromeda.

 

[Duncan Hills Coffee]

I hate how you've spent so much time building towards the climactic showdown with the Reapers in ME3 but you spend most of the game fighting Cerberus.

Fuck that noise.

I especially hate that the game tries to justify it by saying, "Oh this happens every cycle! The Reapers indoctrinate a group of people to undermine those resisting the Reapers!" Except the Reapers couldn't have picked a worse group than Cerberus. Cerberus is hated by pretty much the entire galaxy and their efforts to undermine the war effort boil down to building bases in bumfuck space or violently attacking Alliance bases.

You know who would have been better candidates for indoctrination? Politicians. Military leaders. People in actual power. Nobody trusted Cerberus even before the Reapers arrived so they're an inconvenience at best. How much more intriguing would it be if someone who was important was indoctrinated and Shepard had to deal with the possibility of a leader being under Reaper control? It's kinda there with Udina, but it's never confirmed outright and it's so glossed over that it's never really clear why he helped with the coup.

Goddamn was indoctrination a mishandled concept.

 

[Milwaukee Macho Man]

I especially hate that the game tries to justify it by saying, "Oh this happens every cycle! The Reapers indoctrinate a group of people to undermine those resisting the Reapers!" Except the Reapers couldn't have picked a worse group than Cerberus. Cerberus is hated by pretty much the entire galaxy and their efforts to undermine the war effort boil down to building bases in bumfuck space or violently attacking Alliance bases.

You know who would have been better candidates for indoctrination? Politicians. Military leaders. People in actual power. Nobody trusted Cerberus even before the Reapers arrived so they're an inconvenience at best. How much more intriguing would it be if someone who was important was indoctrinated and Shepard had to deal with the possibility of a leader being under Reaper control? It's kinda there with Udina, but it's never confirmed outright and it's so glossed over that it's never really clear why he helped with the coup.

Goddamn was indoctrination a mishandled concept.

Imagine if instead of fighting Cerberus in ME3, we had to fight the Alliance who had hoarded the remains of Sovereign and inadvertantly allowed themselves to be indoctrinated.

Imagine if instead of Illusive Man being the big bad, it was the (if they hadn't used him in Arrival) the unseen Admiral Hackett?

 

[ZMOT]

The only good thing about ME3 is its combat relative to the previous two. The rest is complete garbage.

>binds 3 crucial functions to the same key
>marauder shields

the more the tried to copy gears of war, the more they sucked at it. bioware should've stuck to selling "fuck your crew" pseudo-VNs to tumblr...

 

[Emperor Julian]

Personally I think the mistake was running the reaper war at all.

 

[Mooger Meng]

Imagine if instead of fighting Cerberus in ME3, we had to fight the Alliance who had hoarded the remains of Sovereign and inadvertantly allowed themselves to be indoctrinated.

Imagine if instead of Illusive Man being the big bad, it was the (if they hadn't used him in Arrival) the unseen Admiral Hackett?

That would have taken the kind of skill that Bioware jettisoned after the first game.

 

[Snekposter]

I especially hate that the game tries to justify it by saying, "Oh this happens every cycle! The Reapers indoctrinate a group of people to undermine those resisting the Reapers!" Except the Reapers couldn't have picked a worse group than Cerberus. Cerberus is hated by pretty much the entire galaxy and their efforts to undermine the war effort boil down to building bases in bumfuck space or violently attacking Alliance bases.

You know who would have been better candidates for indoctrination? Politicians. Military leaders. People in actual power. Nobody trusted Cerberus even before the Reapers arrived so they're an inconvenience at best. How much more intriguing would it be if someone who was important was indoctrinated and Shepard had to deal with the possibility of a leader being under Reaper control? It's kinda there with Udina, but it's never confirmed outright and it's so glossed over that it's never really clear why he helped with the coup.

Goddamn was indoctrination a mishandled concept.

Well, its not too stupid from the perspective of the Reapers. Given the efforts Cerberus had been doing to acquire and reverse engineer their tech, even or especially the horrifying shit, neutralizing them seems like the best course of action. The longer the war goes on, the more likely Cerberus is able to actually capitalize on that stuff, and in a major way. And wouldn't you know, but it turns out that Cerberus was actually crazy enough to accomplish that, since the Sanctuary datalogs demonstrate that they actually had been able to control Reaper units, even if on just a limited scale, and were just working on a way to get their control signal propagated across a battlefield instead of a lab. But of course we're never told that by anyone or anything and just "lol Cerberus is indoctrinated" and they're working for the Reapers. Never mind that Oleg Petrovsky and Old Man Lawson are most certainly not that.

 

[Dr. Geronimo]

I knew it was going to shit the moment they introduced the Crucible. I knew they were out of brain power then.


All they had to do (or at least what I'd do) would have ended the game at the Illusive Man part at the end, and then have the game do a tally of your choices to see if you made enough 'right' ones, kinda like Witcher 3. They don't have to be specifically paragon or renegade but it would've actually made your decisions matter.

Of course the series loses favor with me every time I think about the fact that I never really chose my options since you were basically forced to hold up-right or down-right every conversation.

 

[Emperor Julian]

Well, its not too stupid from the perspective of the Reapers. Given the efforts Cerberus had been doing to acquire and reverse engineer their tech, even or especially the horrifying shit, neutralizing them seems like the best course of action. The longer the war goes on, the more likely Cerberus is able to actually capitalize on that stuff, and in a major way. And wouldn't you know, but it turns out that Cerberus was actually crazy enough to accomplish that, since the Sanctuary datalogs demonstrate that they actually had been able to control Reaper units, even if on just a limited scale, and were just working on a way to get their control signal propagated across a battlefield instead of a lab. But of course we're never told that by anyone or anything and just "lol Cerberus is indoctrinated" and they're working for the Reapers. Never mind that Oleg Petrovsky and Old Man Lawson are most certainly not that.

What's really weird is the idea that Cerebus was effectively a hostile nation state tier power somehow hidden within an actual nation with distinct tech and institutions was retarded.

 

[TVStactic]

That's because Mac Walters had (and still probably has) a massive hard-on for Cerberus and had to shove them down your throat whenever possible. IIRC I think they may have even had ties to the "Andromeda Initiative", because god forbid there be anything in Mass Effect that Cerberus isn't involved in.

It also doesn't help that they went from a mysterious shadow organization in ME1 to pretty much a full-blown supervillain squad in ME3, complete with them hiring retarded weeb ninjas and plastering their team logo on their fucking coffee mugs, which is something you'd expect to see in Austin Powers or something.

View attachment 2229539

just saying that EDI's cameltoe is on purpose, she is meant to be "attractive" according to the design specs she read from the body.
but yes, cerberus being a "public shadowy organization" instead of a ACTUAL SHADOWY ORGANIZATION is retarded AF because of one fucking retard and his hard on.
game dev lesson N348868374 - ensure consistency instead of letting niggas with their hard-ons fuck everything up. that's how you avoid sounding retarded.

Well, its not too stupid from the perspective of the Reapers. Given the efforts Cerberus had been doing to acquire and reverse engineer their tech, even or especially the horrifying shit, neutralizing them seems like the best course of action. The longer the war goes on, the more likely Cerberus is able to actually capitalize on that stuff, and in a major way. And wouldn't you know, but it turns out that Cerberus was actually crazy enough to accomplish that, since the Sanctuary datalogs demonstrate that they actually had been able to control Reaper units, even if on just a limited scale, and were just working on a way to get their control signal propagated across a battlefield instead of a lab. But of course we're never told that by anyone or anything and just "lol Cerberus is indoctrinated" and they're working for the Reapers. Never mind that Oleg Petrovsky and Old Man Lawson are most certainly not that.

they wanted to go that writing route so they made that, no doubt you can see anybody theorizing that the reapers thought of everything, including having units being "controllable" and whatever. to me it seems a bit lazy and making cerberus the enemy for it's own sake, Udina being a cerberus spy "working" for the best of the Alliance on ME1 was actually a cool shit, nobody knew who cerberus was and it was implied they were illumineetus level shit, but they decided to go for a more open narrative that kind of sucks most of the mystery out, when deus ex mankind divded pulled that shit i also thought it was a bit lazy, most of the "interest" comes from the unkown parts of the organization, opening that for the player already sucks ass instead of letting them uncover it as things goes, making it ambiguous is even better. if they kept the illuminati narrative of cerberus AND followed the "plans within plans" that miranda tells you it would have been fucking great, shit would be ambiguous and somewhat confusing but you'd knew these guys were to be dealt with more caution since you wouldn't know if every human dude you would be talking with was a cerberus OP and you'd be feeding them info to fuck you up later or even tip the battle on your side with them fucking up for others. all to further their unknown agenda.

 

[Snekposter]

What's really weird is the idea that Cerebus was effectively a hostile nation state tier power somehow hidden within an actual nation with distinct tech and institutions was retarded.

Oh yeah, there's no forgiving how this black ops organization of nobodies suddenly had the facilities to build a brand new, experimental, top-of-the-line stealth frigate in like two years after getting their hands on Shepard's corpse (and let's not get into the stupidity of blatantly resurrecting someone from beyond dead). There's mostly dead, there's all dead, and there's " deceased of unassisted reentry in a leaking suit of armor".

 

[Ruin]

Oh yeah, there's no forgiving how this black ops organization of nobodies suddenly had the facilities to build a brand new, experimental, top-of-the-line stealth frigate in like two years after getting their hands on Shepard's corpse (and let's not get into the stupidity of blatantly resurrecting someone from beyond dead). There's mostly dead, there's all dead, and there's " deceased of unassisted reentry in a leaking suit of armor".

They didn't resurrect Shepard. The Shepard in ME 2 and 3 is a Cerberus clone created from cloned tissue samples and reinforced by cybernetics. In the Citadel DLC the villain is one of the failed Shepard clones that didn't make the cut and tries to replace you.

 

[RA-5C Vigilante]

Question for the thread, how would you have handled getting Shepard into a 2 year timeskip that wasn't a totally forced death?

I was thinking maybe a coma and recovery, or something less ridiculous than spending billions of credits to resurrect a guy and not pour more money into your private army

 

[Ruin]

Question for the thread, how would you have handled getting Shepard into a 2 year timeskip that wasn't a totally forced death?

I was thinking maybe a coma and recovery, or something less ridiculous than spending billions of credits to resurrect a guy and not pour more money into your private army

Long mission to a distant system is one that has been used in various sci fi media to explain time skips. Another one I thought of was Shepard being dismissed after their actions in ME1 were deemed too risky/reckless and now they're a smuggler/hired gun on Omega or something until they're pulled back into action by Garrus and have to assemble a crew and investigate missing colonies.

Option two would also allow the plot to bypass Cerberus and the Illusive Man.

 

[April Ryan]

They didn't resurrect Shepard. The Shepard in ME 2 and 3 is a Cerberus clone created from cloned tissue samples and reinforced by cybernetics. In the Citadel DLC the villain is one of the failed Shepard clones that didn't make the cut and tries to replace you.

No, it is repeatedly stated in 2 that you are not a clone, the most obvious being when you first enter the citadel and the cop says that the sensors can flat out detect that shit. This make the citadel plot even more stupid when they act like the clone could go undetected and is somehow alowed to change it's own biometric data. The clone itself was made as an organ donor for the real thing if the cybernetics didn't take, and then was supposed to be destroyed but was saved by Brookes for her retarded, could never in a millon years work unless the writers forget how their own setting works, plan. God I hate the constant tongue-bath that piece of shit gets, I mean for fucks sake biotics are not a genetic trait, a clone of a biotic would not themselves be biotic.

 

[The Fair Lady]

Cerberus was straight-up stupid in 3 and them being such a pain in the ass for basically no reason other than "because, lol" still frustrates me as I go through the Legendary Edition. That's not to say the Reapers are great antagonists either (and don't get me started on the absolute bullshit that is the Catalyst) but Cerberus just makes you roll your eyes.