Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[Arthur Morgan]

Not even close. Pokemon is the second best selling series of all time. Mario STILL has that throne.

Yes but in the book, he says Mario and Nintendo were an underground thing until Pokemon came along and ruined everything by bringing it to the mainstream, making Bob less special. Not kidding. He skipped the N64 and Gamecube eras because it was so damaging to his self image

 

[John Andrews Stan]

And they wonder why they’re seen as man-children.

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

Yes but in the book, he says Mario and Nintendo were an underground thing until Pokemon came along and ruined everything by bringing it to the mainstream, making Bob less special. Not kidding. He skipped the N64 and Gamecube eras because it was so damaging to his self image

Holy fuck that's lunacy. Nintendo was never underground when the Famicom/NES came out.

 

[thx1138]

Holy fuck that's lunacy. Nintendo was never underground when the Famicom/NES came out.

Bob missed the great era of home computing; the days of soldering together your own pirated Apple-II, the whiz-kid with the Imsai or Vector Graphics machine with a terminal, 8" floppy drive and paper tape printer so you could share software, 300 baud accoustic coupler modems - my era.

So, he probably constructed this mental fantasy where the mcdonalds meal level consumer product that was the Nintendo somehow was underground and indie like Chicago industrial music in the mid 80s or something, and because it's in a book, for crying out loud (granted, one he wrote) that makes it a fact. So like the mall kid who bought a copy of Nirvana's Nevermind on release day because Spin magazine said it was going to be big, and they believed that they were at the forefront of the grunge movement, Bob thinks his Consoomerism (is that how to write it?) means he rode some edge of the wave playing Mario Brothers.

 

[PantySniffer69]

Holy fuck that's lunacy. Nintendo was never underground when the Famicom/NES came out.

Really at best you can say late '85 through early '86 when the NES was in limited release it was somewhat underground, but of course this isn't what Bob means. By Christmas 1986 everyone in America had an NES, people's grandmas were playing Mario. If you took a given elementary school classroom, every kid got an NES that Christmas, almost no exceptions.

I think anyone here who's older than Bob, or at least knows video game history, can see that his memory of that era is deranged and stupid.

[An aside, does anyone else unironically feel like playing Super Mario Bros. and eating Chicken Nuggets after spending too much time in this thread? Or is that just me?]

Spoiler: Powerlevel

Been playing Super Mario All-Stars past few nights through Higan, which ties in with another of our lolcows Byuu.

 

[Godzilla@1989]

Someone tells this to Bob whenever he gives hot takes on capeshit.

Dragon Ball Manga Editor Said ‘There’s Nothing in It to Analyze’ | News Break

Dragon Ball is a time-defying, classic manga series that ran for over ten years and continues to be a multimedia goldmine to this day. As a formative work for so many anime fans of its time, entire books have been written diving into Akira Toriyama’s work. Analyses of Dragon Ball, including its...

www.newsbreak.com

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Holy fuck that's lunacy. Nintendo was never underground when the Famicom/NES came out.

Seriously. I am a few years older than Bob, grew up in BFE, and my siblings and I weren’t gamers in a serious sense. We had a NES, got into Mario, then got a Genesis and got into Sonic a little. Total normies. Nintendo was never some cult classic hipster shit.

 

[Mola Ram]

Seriously. I am a few years older than Bob, grew up in BFE, and my siblings and I weren’t gamers in a serious sense. We had a NES, got into Mario, then got a Genesis and got into Sonic a little. Total normies. Nintendo was never some cult classic hipster shit.

This is the same guy who reads secret meanings and earthshattering cultural significance into Marvel movies, one of the most normie, pabulum entertainment products ever shat out by a soulless multinational. Of course he pretends being into Nintendo made him special somehow.

 

[Strange Wilderness]

Given Bob's legendary horniness and simultaneous suckupery to Disney and similar corporations, did he ever comment on Disney+ editing Daryl Hannah's butt in the Disney+ version of "Splash"? Maybe he can give it a pass because the edited scenes are too short to start wanking, as he likely needs to find his little Mario first.

Is Daryl Hannah an Asian lesbian who might be a tranny? If not than Bob has no interest in her. Don't know if he even has Disney+, I know he's a mindless consoomer but he might not have any need for Disney+ when he owns all the MCU on Blu-Ray.

Yes but in the book, he says Mario and Nintendo were an underground thing until Pokemon came along and ruined everything by bringing it to the mainstream, making Bob less special. Not kidding. He skipped the N64 and Gamecube eras because it was so damaging to his self image

He was still suffering PTSD from the Console Wars where he heard over and over again that Mario WASN'T from Brooklyn and that allowed Charlie Sonic to get the drop on Nintendo.

Oh and it wasn't Nintendo ruining Bobs status as geek guru; it was Scream which made nerds and ordinary people making fun of movie cliches mainstream and took away Bobs "coveted" status as "The Movie Guy".

Bob missed the great era of home computing; the days of soldering together your own pirated Apple-II, the whiz-kid with the Imsai or Vector Graphics machine with a terminal, 8" floppy drive and paper tape printer so you could share software, 300 baud accoustic coupler modems - my era.

So, he probably constructed this mental fantasy where the mcdonalds meal level consumer product that was the Nintendo somehow was underground and indie like Chicago industrial music in the mid 80s or something, and because it's in a book, for crying out loud (granted, one he wrote) that makes it a fact. So like the mall kid who bought a copy of Nirvana's Nevermind on release day because Spin magazine said it was going to be big, and they believed that they were at the forefront of the grunge movement, Bob thinks his Consoomerism (is that how to write it?) means he rode some edge of the wave playing Mario Brothers.

He's the more childish version of the College commie Bernie Bro rebel who buys a Che Guevara shirt off Amazon that was made via Bangladesh sweatshop labor to express his desire to redistribute the rich people's wealth in to his long-board fund.

Someone tells this to Bob whenever he gives hot takes on capeshit.

Dragon Ball Manga Editor Said ‘There’s Nothing in It to Analyze’ | News Break

Dragon Ball is a time-defying, classic manga series that ran for over ten years and continues to be a multimedia goldmine to this day. As a formative work for so many anime fans of its time, entire books have been written diving into Akira Toriyama’s work. Analyses of Dragon Ball, including its...

www.newsbreak.com

Unfounded lies, the fact that they would spend 10 episodes charging laser beams on a planet that is five minutes from blowing up is a metaphor for karma and the slow self struggle to overcome ones own sins to achieve enlightenment. The series is actually an improved version of traditional Chinese epics such as Journey into the West and will be remembered alongside it as one of the hallmarks of East Asian literature the way The Mighty Thor will be remembered alongside the Nordic Epics.

 

[LordofCringe7206]

This is the same guy who reads secret meanings and earthshattering cultural significance into Marvel movies, one of the most normie, pabulum entertainment products ever shat out by a soulless multinational. Of course he pretends being into Nintendo made him special somehow.

I love the dichotomy that exists in Bob's mind. Marvel and Nintendo are the absolute height of art and the greatest things to ever exist in entertainment. Any counter arguments go out the window since their popularity with people proves that it must be true

However, they are also these super secret underground works and Bob is one of the few insiders who understands them.

 

[Positron]

Bobby speaks out of turn, barging into queer discourse with incomprehensible logorrhea and fap material:


This BootlegGirl became the soulmate of Bob's. Here's xir turn of sprouting polito-religious logorrhea regarding MCU, with Bobby's replies at the end.


An evil of incomprehensible power and reach is threatening the whole universe, so what better time to suck cocks and munch carpets?

+ + + +
MCU:


Bizarro take on Alien:

The "giant erection" belongs to a female organism with a drive to lay eggs.

The Predators are Looter-coded, but that's okay because consoom!


She-ra is Wuthering Heights!


Consoom and exploit women!


Naomi Wu mistakes a fap poster as the depiction of real life. And so does Bobby, who has even less grasp on reality than Wu does:


+ + + +
Bobby drinks more white-guilt kool-aid and vomits out a blueprint of Superior Future:

It seems -- how can you ever tell for sure with Bobby? -- now he thinks that "a largely capitalist framework" where only the elites occupy position of power is something undesirable, and will, as Alex Hochuli, alluded, stymies the rest of humanity. But then why should the rest of humanity matter to Bob?

 

[Flexo]

An evil of incomprehensible power and reach is threatening the whole universe, so what better time to suck cocks and munch carpets?

The one time I want to agree with Bob and he still mangles the point.

But yeah! Maybe when aliens are invading or half the world is wiped out, who fucks who is maybe a LITTLE less important. Heck I'll even admit that the romance in Thor was the worst part of the series and dragged it down. So this isn't just me shitting on gays - I'm tired of all you meatbags flinging DNA at each other.

 

[Godzilla@1989]

She-ra is Wuthering Heights!

God, seeing forty year old men gush over She-Ra, a kids cartoon, is so embarrassing.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

Bobby drinks more white-guilt kool-aid and vomits out a blueprint of Superior Future:
View attachment 1385241
It seems -- how can you ever tell for sure with Bobby? -- now he thinks that "a largely capitalist framework" where only the elites occupy position of power is something undesirable, and will, as Alex Hochuli, alluded, stymies the rest of humanity. But then why should the rest of humanity matter to Bob?

Bobby's just hangry angry because he isn't in the Superior Future, rubbing elbows with the elite in his robot army with a Chinese trophy wife on his arm.

 

[Strange Wilderness]

Bizarro take on Alien:
View attachment 1385158
The "giant erection" belongs to a female organism with a drive to lay eggs.

Why do people keep bringing up this stupid "theory"? The movie isn't some feminist "fuck all men" rant, it's a horror movie about how one character manages to use their wits and courage to escape a mysterious perfect lifeform. Ripley was originally written to be a man, them being the most competent has nothing to do with their gender and the Alien isn't meant to be a penis/rape metaphor. Its an alien wasp, a vicious, evolutionary well adapted piece of shit, that lays its eggs in other animals and kills them from the inside-out. It stalking the ships corridors reminds me of how any nook and cranny can hide a wasps nest and the bastards will sting you for no reason whatsoever and makes you paranoid about encountering them. It's a movie that plays on our primal fears of darkness, isolation, the unknown, and stinging insects but in a sci-fi setting.

The Predators are Looter-coded, but that's okay because consoom!
View attachment 1385224

Rate me Mad on the Internet all you want but, Fuck you Bob. The design of the Predator wasn't Stan Winston performing a rush job, it was him taking James Camerons suggestion of "make it have mandibles, those would look cool" and creating one of the most iconic movie monsters in all of Hollywood. The tribal look of the Predator isn't an "unfortunate" "problematic" design, it gives subtle unspoken depth to the creatures backstory. He's not a mindless sadistic killer, he's a primitive tribal warrior with a code of honor who paradoxically uses advanced technology in his trophy hunt who, I might add, was played by an African American actor who based his performance of the creature off of traditional African tribal dances. Using the Predator as some jumping off point for cancel/rape culture posturing is so stupid I can't even understand why anyone would try to make a serious argument for it.

In case anyone reading this was wondering; yes I have a hatred and phobia of wasps and a love of The Predator

 

[Jetpack Himmler]

GUISE! Everything is OK now! Corona, racism, and the government trampling on us has all been solved because Nintendo has announced new product and I am excited to consoom new product!

Spoiler: Products heal the pain

It's everyone's favorite on rails, non-shooter involving pokeymins. It's differenet from the one 20 years ago because everything's not a box.

https://twitter.com/the_moviebob/status/1273242885694074882

MovieBob Productions on Twitter: "We're going to be ok." / Twitter

archived 17 Jun 2020 13:17:26 UTC

archive.vn

View attachment 1383411

*Sound of Silence starts playing*

Child: Mommy! Mommy! Look! It's Snorlax!

Mother: No, dear, that's Bob Chipman.

 

[Giga_Nigga_28]

Bizarro take on Alien:

So what does that make the alien queen? A troon?

 

[Meriasek]

So what does that make the alien queen? A troon?

And the Facehuggers? I don't really get this take by Blob here. It's been well established that Giger's xenomoprh design is mainly based on rape, dicks, vags, and what Malcolm Tucker would call "violent sexual imagery".
It's not about toxic masculinity per se, it's about rape in general. "Nobody listened to the woman" is kinda stupid, because the all the characters have been written with interchangeable sexes, which have been switched around before casting. Trying to fit 21st century grievance study topics into a '79 movie might be a nice pastime for these people, but ultimately it's a useless thing to do because there was no intention by the author there.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

I’m just grateful he’s spared us his ignorant-ass commentary on the Atlanta situation tonight. I know Bob’s silence on matters he knows nothing about won’t last, but right now the fact that he’s fixating on LGBTQIA+-/x shit feels like a gift.

 

[Bolo]

Bunch of bullshit. The usual bullshit from Robert I see.

To start, the alien design was a lift from giger other works, and he was already famous for his creatures that have the shape of sexual organs. So there was never any intention to make this particular creature for the movie dick shapped.

The guy who brought Giger to work on the movie was the writter, Dan O'Bannon, who was quite a famous FX guy at the time but not so much as a writer. When he pitched Alien, it was just supposed to be a crappy B-movie with a cool looking monster. Once Fox saw potential and Ridley Scott got involved, they got a bunch of script doctors and changed much of the original script, but and on these changes, they included the character of Ripley, who was a man, but at it's core, it was still just a slasher in space sort of deal.

Once casting started, the came across Sigourney Weaver and she was pretty much a shoe in for the Ripley character, and since these characters were just space truckers, there was little to adapt for the gender stuff.

And Ridley Scott couldn't give less of a shit for which gender the characters had. Scott is notorious to be hand off with actors, just giving them vague instructions if that. The man likes to stay behind the camera and more concerned with the visuals than anything else, and on Alien he is very upfront by saying he barely knew the script.

So, if the dick monster was pretty much designed YEARS before the movie, the original script was a crappy B-movie slasher and nothing else, the original gender of the Ripley character was male, and the Director didn't give two shits about the story, how the hell did Alien now became a metaphor for dismissive female opression?