Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[Oh Long Johnson]

For someone who claims to have ”studied Seminary-level [sic] scripture under Jesuits” and attended ”Mass conducted [sic] in Old Latin [sic]”, he really doesn't understand Latin.

Whenever he speaks about his Catholic upbringing, he reminds me of Alberto Rivera.

Spoiler: Sperging

For the curious, Alberto Rivera was a Spanish fraudster who discovered he could make a quick buck by telling Prods lies about the Catholic Church and the Jesuits. He claimed that:
• he was a ”lay Jesuit” - as the Society of Jesus is an order of priests, laymen cannot join it.
• he was ordained at the age of 17 - canon law says you have to be 23 to be ordained as a deacon, and 25 to be ordained as a priest.
• he brought down a Protestant seminary in Guatemala by having sex with a member of a Catholic Action group - this would not only be sinful, but ignores the fact that there is one Protestant seminary in Guatemala and it has never closed.
• he renounced Catholicism at an open-air Mass in front of 50,000 people. There is no evidence that this Mass actually took place.
• he was persecuted by the Spanish Inquisition, who locked him up in a mental hospital in Barcelona and forced him to recant his renunciation. The Spanish Inquisition was disbanded well over a century before Rivera claimed this happened.

All of this is not just completely batshit, but sounds like the sort of thing Blob would say to get clout on Woke Twitter.

By "Latin mass", it's about a 99% certainty he attended a Puerto Rican or Portuguese wedding or funeral mass.

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

By "Latin mass", it's about a 99% certainty he attended a Puerto Rican or Portuguese wedding or funeral mass.

Yeah. Knowing how hard it can be to find a church that celebrates the TLM even today, I somehow doubt that Bob was going to a Tridentine mass every week in the 1980's.

That said, Blob definitely thinks all of Latin America is a homogenous blob that exists to produce tacos, sombreros and waifus for him.

 

[Giga_Nigga_28]

Bobby cannot stop raging about The Synder Cut. Talking about rent-free.

Jesus Christ Robert, did Snyder kill your dog? Is he so afraid of non muc capeshit being well received that he has to sperg out like this? And when did reviews become goddamn twitter essays? "The movie had x, y & z that I liked/disliked" that's all your review needs you bloviating idiot.

 

[ChampFantana]

He gets more than Chris Chan's tugboat, and CWC managed to get a hooker.

You forgot to mention the rampant incest.

(is it still Islamic content if it's about a different religion?)

Well, the girl would have to lever up his gunt, (or whatever the male equivalent of FUPA is) rig a block and tackle apparatus to keep it out of the way, go spelunking through the secondary and tertiary layers of blubber, supress her dry heaves, find his nub, and stimulate it for her money. I can't even see Bobert's troon sycophants being THAT desperate.

 

[Woe-B-Gon (TM)]

I would just like to say I've been enjoying the Bible Study with Kiwi Farms we've had going on here. Even that specific part of the Bible is so much more wholesome than this thread's normal subject matter.

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

I would just like to say I've been enjoying the Bible Study with Kiwi Farms we've had going on here. Even that specific part of the Bible is so much more wholesome than this thread's normal subject matter.

You know you've fucked up when discussing how to interpret the Bible is less infuriating than discussing your content.

 

[Neko GF]

Original:

Archive (1080p):

 

[he who has thus come/gone]

You know you've fucked up when discussing how to interpret the Bible is less infuriating than discussing your content.

In all fairness, the Bible is eternally more relevant, interesting, and meaningful to our lives (whether as a piece of inspired truth, a set of stories commenting upon the human condition, or a collection of philosophical narratives) than FilmBlob ever will be. Blobert's ego is so large he may think he is making important art (or something), but there's more to gain from discussing a single chapter of the Bible than there is benefit in all of the media ever created by the Chipman clan.

Jesus Christ Robert, did Snyder kill your dog? Is he so afraid of non muc capeshit being well received that he has to sperg out like this? And when did reviews become goddamn twitter essays? "The movie had x, y & z that I liked/disliked" that's all your review needs you bloviating idiot.

"Where's muh hot wahmen in capes?? I need muh funny jokes so I can test muh blood sugar between explosion scenes! Snyder is LITERALLY hurting me!! And if you hurt the Chipmans, you're a NAZI!"

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

there's more to gain from discussing a single chapter of the Bible than there is benefit in all of the media ever created by the Chipman clan.

Two thousand years from now the Bible and Christianity will exist.

The same is not true of Moviebob.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

Two thousand years from now the Bible and Christianity will exist.

The same is not true of Moviebob.

People will speak of Abraham, Moses, the Prophets, Jesus Christ, and the Apostles in 2,000 years. Moviebob will be forgotten by all except the Farms (if we're still around by then.)

"...and to the dust you shall return."

Ironic, because Christian Bob would probably have a chance of dating, getting married and having sex. But if you take all the restrictions off sexuality and discard purity, then the rich and famous are just gonna have harems and Bob is still gonna be alone with his princess peach puppet/hand.

Prior to being Christianized, areas beyond the Roman Empire had such arrangements. Women would flock to the households of the rich and powerful, and poor men would be left with none. Rather than go gay, these poor men formed brigand bands to maraud the rich man's property- and this included raping his harem. Family lines would be traced through the mother because many did not know their father.

Christianity put a stop to that by enforcing monogamy. With more partners available, brigands became married men and settled down, and while banditry didn't disappear entirely, it was reduced substantially.

History does not repeat, but it does echo.

 

[Felis Meanis]

Two thousand years from now the Bible and Christianity will exist.

The same is not true of Moviebob.

In all honesty, I'd hope not. Robert's rampant incompetency and pathetic nature is important to humanity in its own way. Society has strayed from what is good and just purely by allowing such filth as Robert and his family to thrive, and as long as Robert's body of work is allowed to survive, he could serve as a cautionary tale for future humans, who will hopefully manage to rid the Earth of gastropods like Robert. With luck, his existence will survive as a prime example of the epitome of human obsolescence and retardation.

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

In all honesty, I'd hope not. Robert's rampant incompetency and pathetic nature is important to humanity in its own way. Society has strayed from what is good and just purely by allowing such filth as Robert and his family to thrive, and as long as Robert's body of work is allowed to survive, he could serve as a cautionary tale for future humans, who will hopefully manage to rid the Earth of gastropods like Robert. With luck, his existence will survive as a prime example of the epitome of human obsolescence and retardation.

Robert is a modern-day Commodus, and Chris Chan is a modern-day Elagabalus.

Now I'm wondering if that makes KF a modern-day De vita Caesarum.

 

[Tronathon242]

This reminds me of when Blob assumed that Andy Ngô was Japanese and made a joke about Japan fighting for the Axis.

You've gotta be shitting me, right? Well, I can't say I'm totally surprised because he looked at Count Dankula's Twitter, replete with a Scottish flag and Gaelic saying in the bio, and assumed he was English.

You would think someone as obsessed with Japanese games would have figured out what constitutes an average Japanese family name.

 

[Cantercoin]

You've gotta be shitting me, right? Well, I can't say I'm totally surprised because he looked at Count Dankula's Twitter, replete with a Scottish flag and Gaelic saying in the bio, and assumed he was English.

You would think someone as obsessed with Japanese games would have figured out what constitutes an average Japanese family name.

Bob only really likes his husband friend Mario and Godzilla I sincerely doubt he care about anything else involving japan or it's people. You could make make the argument that he has a fascination with china and the ccp since he loves defending them at every turn

 

[AirdropShitposts]

View attachment 2009555

None of the music in the Snyder Cut sounds like he's describing here, JunkieXL is blatantly all over that thing and it's very electronic/guitar, especially for the Flash*. There's no choir music either, or "Leonard Cohen sound-a-likes" that I heard. (edit: wait, does he mean choral music?)

"Hallelujah" is in the end credits but that's obviously for Snyder's daughter more than anything. I wouldn't have gotten on the guy for putting it in the film itself because of that, but he kept it to the trailers and end credits.

Not that Bob needs to even watch it to put out his review about how bad it is.

*The Flash's theme, straight from the soundtrack:

Spoiler

And the other Flash song that uses the same electronic motif:

 

[Gaear Grimsrud]

Bob and his simps always like to chuckle amongst themselves about how Bob lives in our heads rent free.

Yes, I admit that I think about Bob a lot. I have no shame in regards to this. It's perfectly natural to be fascinated by such aberrant curiosities as him.

My attitude about it is the same as Kyle from PKA, who freely admits that he's fascinated by Wingsofredemption, and thinks about him almost every day.

Besides, do the entirety of Trump's voters not live in Bob's own head rent free?

 

[Koby_Fish]

As always, Blob fails to realise that society is made up of families and if you destroy those families, you won't have a society.

It reminds me of CWC's proposal for ”Dating Education”.

A Nazi is a supporter of the National Socialist German Workers' Party. Because the NSDAP hasn't existed for 75 years, it's obvious that people who refer to Nazis are referring to someone else.

Given Moviebob's past takes, I have my suspicions that he uses that term very widely.

I'm sure Moobiebob thinks Nazi means anyone who is racist and bigoted and (secretly) wants to gas the undesirables. Because apparently ONLY the Nazis were racist and bigoted and desired to gas the undesirables.

 

[Flexo]

Holy liquor! We have one bad week at the girder factory and I come back to find 40 pages in the bob thread?? Well, time to catch up, 10 pages at a time...

I would love for just once Bob and Patrick Sean Tomlinson get into an argument.
"Who is this child?"
"Why is this thing bothering me?"
"Listen here, kid-"
"Aww it thinks it's people."

Just round and round, it would be a glorious feedback loop of kindergarten dialog.

Being a democracy didn't prevent America's politicians from inflicting the kind of damage upon the country that very few absolute monarchs in history have ever done upon their own. Heck, the first thing John Adams did when he got into power was to go full mad tyrant and persecute anyone who approved of the French Revolution. Monarchs are no more destructive than democratic politicians are. As for the kings, most monarchs are just bean-counters with a crown, being forced to balance the interests of the peasants, the lords, and the established church, while making sure all three classes either needed them or supported them one way or another. Few of them ever go mad like Nero, and those who do end up getting overthrown by their lords or shanked by their guards. Just look at Byzantium. Unpopular Emperors get deposed rather quickly.

To be completely pedantic, a lot of the "virtues" of monarchy and the "vices" of democracy are really a result of differing technologies. When it takes a day or two for new to arrive via horseback from the furthest reaches of the kingdom it's just a practical challenges of tech kept a limit on the King's tyranny.

North Korea and China are apt demonstrations today of how badly a monarchy could have gotten with modern tech at their cruelty's disposal. (Even if they want to avoid being monarchies in the most pedantic sense.)

So to sum up: do not take as a positive what was temporal happenstance.

Wandavision isn't even the best "mindtrip" superhero show.

Legion was better, and it managed to keep up being trippy for it's entire 3 season run, while Wandavision only kept it up for 3 episodes.

Whoa - is Legion already over? 3 seasons? Seemed like it just came out. Where does the time go...

Geez, Bob, now you're ripping off jokes done by writers of the babylon bee and axe cop!

https://www.amazon.com/Bears-Want-Kill-You-Authoritative-ebook/dp/B07RPBPC6S

The "new" hotness amongst the SJW-aligned media, who are playing by cancel culture rules of engagement, is that if you can find a person who thinks "government policy A" was conspiracy, any criticism of "government policy A" is automatically conspiracy, even if the claim is never made. If you didn't like that policy, you automatically align with the kookiest kook they can find, even if you lay out that you don't think the government caused COVID, just mishandled it, you are automatically in the group that thinks snow isn't real.... even if the Supreme Court later agrees and strikes down said policy, if you called it Unconstitutional at the time due to a conflict with the First Amendment, you just got lucky, you REALLY wanted it gone because you think the government is trying to put microchips in the vaccines.

The technical term for it is "nutpicking" - basically whatever side you are on is associated with the worst, most crazy member of your side. (and if you don't have one, give us a second to invent one)

The collapse of gatekeeping and rise of social media giving every nut a voice basically means this is the new normal and there's no side of it subsiding any time soon.

Bobby anticipates a "sexy" character in Powerpuff Girls.

Geez, Bobby...

bleedman already did it. (I hate how Bob is such a hack - constantly stealing from others without ever giving them credit)

P.S. That was literally the 8th comic.

I love MST3K. I prefer Mike over Joel. The new stuff on Netflix is almost insufferable. Don't get me wrong, the jokes are funny but they never SHUT THE HELL UP! I'm reminded of the gag from the Plinket review of Ghostbusters where a producer played by Rich tells Paul Feige played by Jack that if nobody's talking then nobody's laughing. Any time that no one on screen is talking the riffers are bombarding you with jokes and never give you or the jokes any time to breathe. It's super disappointing. The Rifftrax stuff has become incredibly formulaic. "Oh that's X. I'm sorry, by X I really mean Y.". The first has no restraint and the latter is just lazy. Comedy is hard, I get it, and today so many people are unable to understand it that putting in the effort seems hardly worth it.

Now that I think about it I don't know if I've ever seen Bob talk directly about it outside of a Big Picture he did years ago when Joel announced the kickstarter. I know there was a little bit of a push two or three years ago to denounce MST3k because it helped raise a generation of people, read men, who only mock art, read Ghostbusters and other trash, and tare it down. I wanna say he retweeted Sady, now troon Jude, Doyle when she complained about it.

As you'll notice on the mst3k/rifftrax thread, I fear part of what is slowly killing Rifftrax is the woke infection as more and more "jokes" get closed off as appropriate so they keep having to make the laughs from a more narrow pool.

 

[make_it_so]

I'm sure Moobiebob thinks Nazi means anyone who is racist and bigoted and (secretly) wants to gas the undesirables. Because apparently ONLY the Nazis were racist and bigoted and desired to gas the undesirables.

Well, then I guess that means that Bob thinks that Mayo-Ghouls don't count as undesirables. You know, in spite of what he types out every fucking day.

 

[Carlos Thin]

It's been probably asked a million times, but is there a link anywhere for Brick By Brick? The megalink in the OP is dead