Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

How will Bob react to seeing the Mario film?


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Bob thinks Musk cares about his "investment" in Twitter financially when the guy sold how much of his own Tesla stock last year just to make a point about taxes on Twitter.

Bob "advising" the world's rich elites on the easy and obvious ways he sees to make massive amounts of money that he would never personally partake in (to maintain his extremely high principles about life and business) will never not be funny. Why aren't you shorting Twitter stock, Bob? "You are not a person."
 
He read about them in Nintendo Power or watched a play through on YouTube and thinks that's the exact same as playing it
He and the lesser brother tried to make a show out of watching long plays. Sarah is also there for some reason.
They also did one for Altered Beast and from what I remember from watching it, I ain't rewatching that crap for a loosely related tangent, they both had no idea of what the game was about or any of the mechanics. They knew that at some point the guy becomes a beast. They did two episodes and I think because it was too much work to do the setup instead of just doing what GameGrumps or OneyPlays does and stream them playing the game while having fun.
 
I mean it's clear Bob never understood sonic remember his old game overthinker video on how he'd "fix" sonic?
Bob's entire thing is to make Sonic just SATAM and a really generic edgy story. I also like how all his story suggestions are the most cliche thing possibly imagined and believes its some decent story.
 
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Bob's entire thing is to make Sonic just SATAM and a really generic edgy story. I also like how all his story suggestions are the most cliche thing possibly imagined and believes its some decent story.
The most hilarious part, is that Bob's story reminds me of a few old Sonic fan sprite comics, that followed the same edgy plot concept.
 
The most hilarious part, is that Bob's story reminds me of a few old Sonic fan sprite comics, that followed the same edgy plot concept.
It always makes me laugh how Bob constantly wants to make the most childish of franchises into edgy bullshit while wanting more adult franchises to be kiddified.
 
He and the lesser brother tried to make a show out of watching long plays. Sarah is also there for some reason.
They also did one for Altered Beast and from what I remember from watching it, I ain't rewatching that crap for a loosely related tangent, they both had no idea of what the game was about or any of the mechanics. They knew that at some point the guy becomes a beast. They did two episodes and I think because it was too much work to do the setup instead of just doing what GameGrumps or OneyPlays does and stream them playing the game while having fun.
The key to that kind of thing is having an appealing personality (or tits). The brothers Chip certainly have titties, so I don't know what the issue is.
 
It always makes me laugh how Bob constantly wants to make the most childish of franchises into edgy bullshit while wanting more adult franchises to be kiddified.
Ya know, this always struck me as a weird paradox. Fatso always rambled about "DEM MEAN FPS-DUDE BRAH-SUPER EDGY-MILITaRY SHOOTAHS!!!!" and yet his biggest desire is for Mario to basically be done as a Tom Clancy novel.
 
Ya know, this always struck me as a weird paradox. Fatso always rambled about "DEM MEAN FPS-DUDE BRAH-SUPER EDGY-MILITaRY SHOOTAHS!!!!" and yet his biggest desire is for Mario to basically be done as a Tom Clancy novel.
He wants Mario to be that combined with a Lord of the Rings style epic.

Also his shit about whining about adult edgier franchises to be kiddified is to piss off the dudebros
 
Bob's entire thing is to make Sonic just SATAM and a really generic edgy story. I also like how all his story suggestions are the most cliche thing possibly imagined and believes its some decent story.
Meanwhile, in that same video he completely dismisses the Tomb Raider franchise's gameplay mechanics and storyline. I guess since that's a game for "dudebros" and came out on the Playstation then it doesn't have any merit.
 
I mean it's clear Bob never understood sonic remember his old game overthinker video on how he'd "fix" sonic?
Oh, that's amazing. He claims the "limited growth" way to do things is to keep doing similar things except in spinoffs... in the same breath as he mentions "pokeymon".

Then he basically says Sonic should have a stamina meter. A stamina meter that doesn't even autorecharge. Then he talks about simple as "fits on an NES controller", like an analog stick or 3 buttons is complexity. Then he goes full "Look at me grownup!" edgy suggesting the entire supporting cast be introduced and murdered rather than just (here's a thought) not used. Because writing a fanfic - which is what this is, let's be honest - where you kill all the characters you hate on page 2 is such an original and mature concept and not what every 13-year-old with a fresh fanfiction.net account did.

Aaand then he talks about just doing a rehash of SatAM and says "You'd probably have a massive massive hit but it's still unrealistic and I'm not sure it's a great idea to begin with." Think about that for a second, which is longer than he did. He starts claiming the idea is a likely hit and then, in about five words, loses the thread and declares it's not a great idea. Assuming his idea is indeed a likely hit (HAHAHA!) why would having a hit be a bad idea? In the middle of a masturbatory rant about how to make the series successful again? Does he think it's got potential as a hipster franchise? "You like the Adventures of Sonic? Mainstream Sonic is laaaaame. I like my Sonic underground." Yes I know what I just said.

And then goes full Care Bears Paradise Lost, so much so that he admits it on a text screen. A glorious text screen that shows how much of a thinker this overthinker is:
moviebob-GAME OVERTHINKER V22-3YDrVRqmrLY.mp4_snapshot_09.41.076.jpg

There's nothing in his wanky fanfic that even remotely looks like The Secret of NIMH. Except maybe talking animals and animal experimentation but those things aren't in a Sonic fic because the writer loves Don Bluth films, they're there because it's a goddamn Sonic fic!

Between seemingly missing the point of the movie and calling them "Nihm" it's almost like he doesn't know that the National Institute of Mental Health is an actual organization with a headquarters he could drive to in less than eight hours.

Could you imagine someone talking about that "FBI" show but they spell it "Fib" and don't seem to understand what level of government the investigators belong to? Would you be able to take a word they utter about any TV show seriously ever again?
 
Oh, that's amazing. He claims the "limited growth" way to do things is to keep doing similar things except in spinoffs... in the same breath as he mentions "pokeymon".

Then he basically says Sonic should have a stamina meter. A stamina meter that doesn't even autorecharge. Then he talks about simple as "fits on an NES controller", like an analog stick or 3 buttons is complexity. Then he goes full "Look at me grownup!" edgy suggesting the entire supporting cast be introduced and murdered rather than just (here's a thought) not used. Because writing a fanfic - which is what this is, let's be honest - where you kill all the characters you hate on page 2 is such an original and mature concept and not what every 13-year-old with a fresh fanfiction.net account did.

Aaand then he talks about just doing a rehash of SatAM and says "You'd probably have a massive massive hit but it's still unrealistic and I'm not sure it's a great idea to begin with." Think about that for a second, which is longer than he did. He starts claiming the idea is a likely hit and then, in about five words, loses the thread and declares it's not a great idea. Assuming his idea is indeed a likely hit (HAHAHA!) why would having a hit be a bad idea? In the middle of a masturbatory rant about how to make the series successful again? Does he think it's got potential as a hipster franchise? "You like the Adventures of Sonic? Mainstream Sonic is laaaaame. I like my Sonic underground." Yes I know what I just said.

And then goes full Care Bears Paradise Lost, so much so that he admits it on a text screen. A glorious text screen that shows how much of a thinker this overthinker is:
View attachment 3145611

There's nothing in his wanky fanfic that even remotely looks like The Secret of NIMH. Except maybe talking animals and animal experimentation but those things aren't in a Sonic fic because the writer loves Don Bluth films, they're there because it's a goddamn Sonic fic!

Between seemingly missing the point of the movie and calling them "Nihm" it's almost like he doesn't know that the National Institute of Mental Health is an actual organization with a headquarters he could drive to in less than eight hours.

Could you imagine someone talking about that "FBI" show but they spell it "Fib" and don't seem to understand what level of government the investigators belong to? Would you be able to take a word they utter about any TV show seriously ever again?
I like that his "level design masterclasses" are all games he played as a kid + the exact same 2 N64 games that every single nostalgia blinded manchild considers the best games ever

beyond that, he brings out the tired old worn-out "sonic's stupid friends™" argument every uniformed individual who pretends they're a "real sonic fan" trudges out. it really is telling of how bob seriously has no originality since his only ideas are to make sonic into a shitty 3d Mario clone with a tacked-on speed gimmick and all his story ideas are all ripoffs of other shit has bob ever had an original idea in his head or would the concept cause him to have some kind of mental breakdown?
 
Well, now I know why Bob took a shot. Tim Pool just admitted in his show tonight that he's excited for Sonic the Hedgehog 2.

Also, unless I'm misreading Positron's snipping method, it looks like moviebob deleted his response then reposted it as a quote tweet?

1649124956642.png


The coward. Probably afraid of getting noticed by the mighty milquetoast.
 
I mean Bob never understood sonic remember his old game overthinker video on how he'd "fix" sonic?

Bob's entire thing is to make Sonic just SATAM and a really generic edgy story. I also like how all his story suggestions are the most cliche thing possibly imagined and believes it's some decent story.


It's worse than that. He wishes to sabotage Sonic out of sick brand loyalty to make sure it can never recover and to be killed off so Mario can be the sole dominant mascot.

Remember, this is the same motherfucker that thought the console wars were his Vietnam. So it's not hard to assume what I said also plays a role in why he hates the Sonic films. Because they represent a area where Mario might never cover with it's sole legacy being one of the worst Video Game adaptation and possibly one of the most unremarkable ones.

While Sonic has honest to god people of all ages excited for their films. They might not be trailblazers but they are still memorable enough for audiences to want more.

And Bob hates that. He hates that fans managed to save the film series as he rooted for them to fail.
 
It's worse than that. He wishes to sabotage Sonic out of sick brand loyalty to make sure it can never recover and to be killed off so Mario can be the sole dominant mascot.

Remember, this is the same motherfucker that thought the console wars were his Vietnam. So it's not hard to assume what I said also plays a role in why he hates the Sonic films. Because they represent a area where Mario might never cover with it's sole legacy being one of the worst Video Game adaptation and possibly one of the most unremarkable ones.

While Sonic has honest to god people of all ages excited for their films. They might not be trailblazers but they are still memorable enough for audiences to want more.

And Bob hates that. He hates that fans managed to save the film series as he rooted for them to fail.
Oh yeah there is no question Bob has a personal hatred of Sonic. Like when they changed the design, it wasn't because Bob hates that studios will listen to fans, but it's that on some level he knew that this film would be more successful when he wanted it to fail.
 
Oh, that's amazing. He claims the "limited growth" way to do things is to keep doing similar things except in spinoffs... in the same breath as he mentions "pokeymon".

Then he basically says Sonic should have a stamina meter. A stamina meter that doesn't even autorecharge. Then he talks about simple as "fits on an NES controller", like an analog stick or 3 buttons is complexity. Then he goes full "Look at me grownup!" edgy suggesting the entire supporting cast be introduced and murdered rather than just (here's a thought) not used. Because writing a fanfic - which is what this is, let's be honest - where you kill all the characters you hate on page 2 is such an original and mature concept and not what every 13-year-old with a fresh fanfiction.net account did.

Aaand then he talks about just doing a rehash of SatAM and says "You'd probably have a massive massive hit but it's still unrealistic and I'm not sure it's a great idea to begin with." Think about that for a second, which is longer than he did. He starts claiming the idea is a likely hit and then, in about five words, loses the thread and declares it's not a great idea. Assuming his idea is indeed a likely hit (HAHAHA!) why would having a hit be a bad idea? In the middle of a masturbatory rant about how to make the series successful again? Does he think it's got potential as a hipster franchise? "You like the Adventures of Sonic? Mainstream Sonic is laaaaame. I like my Sonic underground." Yes I know what I just said.

And then goes full Care Bears Paradise Lost, so much so that he admits it on a text screen. A glorious text screen that shows how much of a thinker this overthinker is:
View attachment 3145611

There's nothing in his wanky fanfic that even remotely looks like The Secret of NIMH. Except maybe talking animals and animal experimentation but those things aren't in a Sonic fic because the writer loves Don Bluth films, they're there because it's a goddamn Sonic fic!

Between seemingly missing the point of the movie and calling them "Nihm" it's almost like he doesn't know that the National Institute of Mental Health is an actual organization with a headquarters he could drive to in less than eight hours.

Could you imagine someone talking about that "FBI" show but they spell it "Fib" and don't seem to understand what level of government the investigators belong to? Would you be able to take a word they utter about any TV show seriously ever again?
This is basically Bob admitting he doesn't understand Secret of NIMH (OR High Plains Drifter, for that matter) without saying that outright. Having watched a LOT of westerns, INCLUDING High Plains Drifter, it in no way has fuck-all to do with the thing Bob proposed, except in the bare bones way of "reluctant hero, he come to town" - which could be said of Shane, A Fistful of Dollars, and a bunch of other westerns - hell, of the lot of them, High Plains Drifter fits the LEAST, but this may be because 1) Bob's a crayon-eating, blue-curtain-analyzing idiot, or 2) Bob didn't watch any of those other westerns, or 3) both. Same with Secret of NIMH, which I've watched enough times to remember VERY WELL. Sonic isn't Mrs. Brisby (Frisby in the book). Robotnik's experimentations are NOTHING like in Secret of NIMH. Turning a brown hedgehog blue is NOTHING compared to oh I dunno, making RATS AND MICE SUPER INTELLIGENT/SAPIENT.

Hurr durr animal experimentation must be secret of nihm lulz. NO, Bob, animal experimentation was a TINY part of that movie. In order for it to be Secret of Nimh, there would have to be an analogue to Nicodemus, Dragon the cat, the farmer and his family that are ignorant of everything going on (except that there's rats in the rosebushes), Mr. Ages, Jeremy the crow, the traitor Jenner, etc, having to move the damn MOUSE HOUSE with a sick child inside before the farmer unwittingly destroys it with his damn plow (which was the WHOLE POINT of the entire story) and it's just not there in Sanic.

Also it's clear Bob either never knew, or doesn't remember what NIMH stands for (in addition to his inverterate misspelling/typoing syndrome). Something something his fingers are too fat and he needs a special wand for his phone.

It's worse than that. He wishes to sabotage Sonic out of sick brand loyalty to make sure it can never recover and to be killed off so Mario can be the sole dominant mascot.

Remember, this is the same motherfucker that thought the console wars were his Vietnam. So it's not hard to assume what I said also plays a role in why he hates the Sonic films. Because they represent a area where Mario might never cover with it's sole legacy being one of the worst Video Game adaptation and possibly one of the most unremarkable ones.

While Sonic has honest to god people of all ages excited for their films. They might not be trailblazers but they are still memorable enough for audiences to want more.

And Bob hates that. He hates that fans managed to save the film series as he rooted for them to fail.
"But but friendo, that was a joke, about the console wars being my own personal Vietnam! A bad joke, but a joke nonetheless! Just like my jokes about eugenics and how it was ruined by people that lost WW II!" - Bob, desperately trying to cover his ginormous ass

Bob can't help but hate Sonic (though he tries to fool us by telling us he didn't hate Sonic SatAM). It's in his bones. That's the reason he didn't want the redesign. He knew that if Sonic remained in the form originally envisioned for the film, it would flop harder than Ishtar. That's why he's seething with rage about all of this, because it takes attention from his precious waifu Mario Princess Peach. Bob hates Sonic because he ain't him.
 
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Bob thinks the world is zero-sum, and for anything to gain popularity, it must take it from something else. Two similar things cannot, ever, exist in parallel.

He honestly believes that even a "Coke vs Pepsi" consumer choice where there is literally no objective way to say which one was "right" and it all comes down to personal taste not only has an "obvious" right choice. (He made it, just ask him!) But that choice can only ever directly decrease the ability of someone else to NOT choose it. And he's just that invested in his preferred brand that he literally wants to defend it to the death, because consumer options, let alone competition, is a DIRECT THREAT to his life... he really thinks that.

When he picks his Coke, he isn't just making a personal decision with no bearing on the world at large, he's actively DESTROYING pepsi-choosers, and that's GOOD!

Meanwhile, vice-versa, people choosing Pepsi are directly TRYING TO KILL him.

That's why he feels no remorse, no shame and no pity when he calls for others to so casually be swept into the dustbin - their mere existence holds him back if not threatens his life.

His personal identity is intertwined in media brands to a degree even kids and sports fans don't exhibit towards theirs, which society is more forgiving of bein passionate about to start with.

I mean, who'd get stranger looks on average out in the street?

A man with a facial tattoo that said "Dallas Cowboys"?

Or one that said " Nintendo " or "CNN" ?

Bob idolizes things society says you should only ever have a healthy respect for at best, takes ones that society says "You can be fanatical about these, but it's all in good fun, don't actually KILL anyone over it" and plays them dead fucking straight in seriousness, and goes the extra mile to add the need to execute heretics who won't worship HIS gods, like Mario.
 
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No, see, someone pulled a gun on MovieBob, guys. I totally know how it happened.

In the middle of a cold Boston blizzard at around 3am, MovieBob looked around his mom's basement and there was no food there. So he went down an old alley to shop at Costco, but they weren't open 24 hours like he thought, so he went to Subway to grab a meatball sub. And then when he was walking back two guys in ski-masks and red hats were screaming "Hey! Game Overthinker!" and he was like "What? I don't go by Game Overthinker. I have no idea what you're talking about." But then, see, the guys shouted "Goddamn Game Overthinker Fat Faggot!" and he was like "The fuck did you just say to me?!"

And then they attacked him and yelled "This is MAGA country, bitch!" and pulled out their AR-16 Bushmaster Berettas manufactured by Colt and told him to get on his knees and worship Christ, but being a thinker, not a believer, he refused! So he fought the fuck back. Then they splashed him with bleach and tied a shoelace noose to his neck (a difficult feat, since his neck is so fat) that had a cross on it, and then they ran away into the night.
 
Why is Bob acting like an expert on a picture of what is probably a coyote? He’s a fat bastard who probably rarely sees a deer when his mother needs him to take the trash out.

I’ve been hunting enough to take a gamble and say that’s just a coyote. It just pisses me off that he’s coming across as some wildlife expert about Canadian Wolf-hybridization.
 
Why is Bob acting like an expert on a picture of what is probably a coyote? He’s a fat bastard who probably rarely sees a deer when his mother needs him to take the trash out.

I’ve been hunting enough to take a gamble and say that’s just a coyote. It just pisses me off that he’s coming across as some wildlife expert about Canadian Wolf-hybridization.
Same reason he acts like an expert on everything.

He’s a retarded cunt.
 
It's worse than that. He wishes to sabotage Sonic out of sick brand loyalty to make sure it can never recover and to be killed off so Mario can be the sole dominant mascot.

Remember, this is the same motherfucker that thought the console wars were his Vietnam. So it's not hard to assume what I said also plays a role in why he hates the Sonic films. Because they represent a area where Mario might never cover with it's sole legacy being one of the worst Video Game adaptation and possibly one of the most unremarkable ones.

While Sonic has honest to god people of all ages excited for their films. They might not be trailblazers but they are still memorable enough for audiences to want more.

And Bob hates that. He hates that fans managed to save the film series as he rooted for them to fail.
"He wishes to sabotage Sonic out of sick brand loyalty to make sure it can never recover and to be killed off so Mario can be the sole dominant mascot."

Even Nintendo wouldn't want that. They like Sonic pretty well since he sells games on their platform now and have done crossover games with him and Mario. I wonder if Bob got really, really upset about a game with Mario and Sonic in it. It's a gap in my Bob scholarship, I'm sad to say.
 
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