Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[Marshal Mannerheim]

The term for it is the hedonism treadmill.

And you'd know about that, wouldn't you?

 

[Mola Ram]

YOU DUMB ASS. EVERYTHING THERE IS WRONG.

Hey, come on, you can't expect a pop culture critic to know anything about pop culture.

 

[Flexo]

And you'd know about that, wouldn't you?
View attachment 2696911

Hey, he throws some of the best parties!

And is always good for an alibi.

 

[Woe-B-Gon (TM)]

HAHA, Bobby, no. I seriously doubt you have the grip strength to do that to anything but a prop glass, and as far as I know those can safely be broken by hand (particularly if you need to salvage the take - TW: Lederhosen).

Besides, she was a disability activist - shouldn't you be happy the cause has a martyr? (EDIT: Then again, maybe this is how he shows his joy....)

 

[AirdropShitposts]

View attachment 2695909
Translated from Stupid to English: "If more people had believed Führer Hillary's lies about Donald Trump's ties with Russia, I'd've already been in my rightfully deserved private spaceship right now."

Robert is showing his provincial ass again. Yes, 4507 US troops were killed in Iraq. 25,000+ total allied troops died, a hundred thousand were wounded. Estimates of civilian causalities reach up to a million or more. But they don't matter to Robert because they aren't Americans. (How many of those troops would matter to Robert if he knew they would have voted for Trump?)

Similarly, COVID-19 has led to over 5 million recorded global deaths so far. Also, Russiagate took off AFTER Trump had already been elected and taken office, not prior to the election. We know this because the entire basis of the conspiracy theory is that Russia STOLE THE ELECTION for Trump by putting ads on Facebook. Mike Pence, not Hillary, would have become President had people believed in Russiagate enough to impeach and convict Trump over it, and Pence already was the point man for the US COVID-19 response anyway. (Besides, how many of those 750K does he care about actually since at least half are probably Trump voters.)

Turns out one of Bobby's favorite movies is inspired by one of the worst movies that ever movied.
View attachment 2696362

Robert is missing the point here exceptionally. The comparisons ARE pretty dang thematic and well placed. Justice League and Eternals share the same thematic concept on how it treats those "nephilim", the gods we know and love (the superheroes) face the consequences of a Bigger God With Goals (Darkseid/The Celestials) existing and the former triumph this time because of their reflections of/ties to humanity/Earth.

Zhao's comparison to Man of Steel is not merely "visually/tonally" (as she explains herself) but because of what Snyder and Nolan did as their pitch for Superman. The Eternals tried to live as humans for thousands of years without using their god abilities to alter anything, which is functionally similar to Snyder's Clark. This was Jonathan Kent's argument in Man of Steel (and BvS), that Clark should not use his powers, not even to save people, because people will fear a god among them. Clark decides differently and lives as a nomad due to it, then shows himself publicly when some Bad Gods (Zod) show up. (BvS deals with the consequences of this among the humans.) Eternals uses a different reason to get them to reveal themselves but it's the same thematic idea of dealing with human-like gods resisting their godhood until they can't.

The major difference in execution (outside of quality, which I will leave up to the individual viewer) is Snyder eventually took like ten hours to tell his trilogy and gradually added the components to the pot, Eternals mashes it into a little over 2 and a half hours with every component of the backstory thrown in, the team assembled from the start pretty much and mostly ignores the humans like the MCU traditionally has. The other difference regards what is to come and that while we now know Snyder sketched out a full Darkseid Trilogy that would flesh out what was in Justice League merely a MacGuffin into the full Anti-Life Equation, victory for Darkseid and all, something we know we're never getting. We don't know what if anything Marvel will do with the Eternals and the Celestials. In a decade the Eternals might be alongside the Avengers, the Fantastic Four and the X-Men in taking down somebody like Apocalypse as the first step to something like the First Firmament with similar multiversial consequences at stake. Or they might never be mentioned again as the MCU mines literally everything else in the canon once it finally gets its hands on the FF and X-Men.

Robert is lavishly praising the "esoteric and philosophical" concept of higher powers simply existing because at this point that's all Eternals has done with them, shown they exist and they matter. Justice League got to the same exact point. He hates it to where he refuses to grasp it in one instance, but can't get enough of it and thinks it's going to change and drive a massive Disney franchise in the other.

One last thing I want to mention in this stupid post that became a stupider essay. I'm not at all saying Zhao copied Snyder outside of the part she already acknowledged being influenced by, the rest of the thematic similarity is a total coincidence that resulted from both favorably mining Kirby's lore. Zhao had to film before Snyder's Justice League was even approved by WB. If the Snyder cut never happened, nobody would be comparing Eternals to Justice League to Robert's consternation because all of this stuff was stripped from the Whedon version except for one of Steppenwolf's lines. Actually, had Marvel not delayed Eternals from February, they would have got to Kirby "first" too and Justice League probably would have been compared to Eternals instead. Probably especially by Robert.

 

[link1234]

I just want to point this out because it is very dumb and might get lost in the sea of dumb that Bob spews. I remember what Bob is going off about with the Wonder Women reference. What happened with the Wonder Women screening was one movie chain had a dumb stunt making a women only showing. If I am not mistaken this is illegal in one of the states that it happened in. I think the chain did donate some money to a women's health organization or something. There was one man who bought a ticket and went to see it anyways which I don't remember Bob saying anything but I do remember making fun of Dobson and Alison Rapp for being pissy about it.
The reason I am bring this up is because the OP is clearly talking about the actual film saying no one was mad at it. Bob can't find any evidence of people being mad at Wonder Women so he talks about some unrelated screening that did not have any baring on the film itself. It is completly irrelevent but Bob brings it up anyways as proof that audicnes hate female lead movies or directors or whatever dumb take he is on just to defend Enterals.

 

[AngeloTheWizard]

Yeah, I'm sure RLM hates that people take their obviously acted out reactions and give them free advertising.

Rich Evans cringes in fear every time he sees himself slumped over in a chair.

Its not like Mike and Jay have vocalized how fucking bored of superhero movies they are anyway.

All to have to do is look at how Jay completely overacts when delivering "FUCK YOU IT'S JANUARY!" to know that RLM *totally* doesn't want people making memes about them.

 

[Gaear Grimsrud]

Sounds like they're talking about people like Bob.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

PLEASE HELP I'M BEING OPPRESSED BY A NUMBER ON A CALENDAR

The reference is to Christian slaughter campaigns like the Crusades. Jacob Wohl is a fucking reetard anyway, but he’s extra stupid for not realizing that Jewish assimilation has historically led to unprecedented Jewish death. Jews who put up Xmas trees are Hitler’s wet dream.

I think Robert’s designation of the Catholic Church as a capitalist entity is related to things like its real estate business. Look at the financials of any archdiocese if you doubt this.

 

[AirdropShitposts]

I just want to point this out because it is very dumb and might get lost in the sea of dumb that Bob spews. I remember what Bob is going off about with the Wonder Women reference. What happened with the Wonder Women screening was one movie chain had a dumb stunt making a women only showing. If I am not mistaken this is illegal in one of the states that it happened in. I think the chain did donate some money to a women's health organization or something. There was one man who bought a ticket and went to see it anyways which I don't remember Bob saying anything but I do remember making fun of Dobson and Alison Rapp for being pissy about it.

Found the stories about this, Alamo Drafthouse did three womens only screenings which got a total of two complaints, one of which was filed by a gay man:

Now the chain has apologized for the screenings in a letter to the city. Drafthouse admitted their advocacy of a film screening for women was in violation of anti-discrimination laws in Austin, Texas. The apology follows an outpouring of dissent from men who claim they felt discriminated against, resulting in two official complaints to be filed with the city.

"Respondent did not realize that advertising a ‘women’s-only’ screening was a violation of discrimination laws,” the theater wrote to the city. “Respondent has a very strict non-discrimination policy in place, but this policy did NOT include a specific prohibition against advertising.”

The complaints were filed by Albany law professor Stephen Clark and an anonymous man. Clark, a gay lawyer specializing in sexual orientation and employment law, explained that the promotion of the screenings didn't sit well with him. "I’m a specialist in anti-discrimination law, so I was fairly certain that this was not lawful," he told MyStatesman. "If they were trying to do a gay-only ‘Brokeback Mountain,’ I would feel the same way."

As it turns out, the complaints have at least some legal merit. Austin city equality codes ban any public accommodation — such as a movie theater — from limiting their services for individuals based on factors including race, color, sex, sexual orientation and gender identification. It's a situation even Wonder Woman couldn't fix.

In an attempt to appease those who complained, the chain is offering to send these men DVDs of "Wonder Woman," and will update their discrimination policies in addition to sending a letter out to their staff. If the men do not accept these terms, the city may launch an investigation into the reports and the theater could face possible repercussions.

“There was a vibrant argument happening on Facebook,” he told The Washington Post. “But when the theater responded to complaints, they were pretty snide about it and willing to mock anyone who had a complaint and that really struck me.”

He went on to make a more serious charge: "There is also the fact that what they were doing is illegal."

After researching Austin's city code, Clark filed an administrative charge with the Equal Employment and Fair Housing Office, claiming that the women-only audience and staff rule at the screening amounts to discrimination against both customers and employees.

“It’s the principle of the thing,” he told The Post. “I’m a gay man, and I’ve studied and taught gay rights for years. Our gay bars have long said that you do not exclude people because they’re gay or straight or transgender — you just can’t do that for any reason.”

“We have to deal with the bachelorette parties that come to the gay bar,” he added. “They’re terribly disruptive, but if you forbid women from coming to a gay bar, you’re starting down a slippery slope. It’s discrimination.”

 

[The Valeyard]

Bobby goes philosophical about The Eternals's impending box-office bomb:
View attachment 2696461

Since he claims to be a film critic, you'd think that Bob would know what other film critics have said about Eternals but here he shows that he doesn't as the negative critic reviews have all praised the film for its diversity and representation.

 

[Gaear Grimsrud]

I wish people would stop saying that Eternals is "different".

It's not. It's still the same old shit, just a lot more slow and boring.

 

[AirdropShitposts]

Since he claims to be a film critic, you'd think that Bob would know what other film critics have said about Eternals but here he shows that he doesn't as the negative critic reviews have all praised the film for its diversity and representation.

I think he's saying that film critics need to be more diverse and if they were they would have liked Eternals. Robert being the rare straight white male who can appreciate it.

Which made me check, and no, Armond White has not yet reviewed the film.

 

[Malagor the dank omen]

I think Robert’s designation of the Catholic Church as a capitalist entity is related to things like its real estate business. Look at the financials of any archdiocese if you doubt this.

So... Owning land is what makes the church capitalist? Isn't it quite far fetched? We know that churches are filthy rich, but that's mostly because of hundreds of years hoarding and demanding tribute from people or excomulgating. Today that holds very little basis tbh. The church was corrupt in the past and it's still corrupt today, but it's far from a capitalist enterpirse or apparatus. After all... What do they sell? Capitalism is focusing on production and sales and as far as we know, the church might be a business, but it's sustained mostly on donations and tax exemptions.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

So... Owning land is what makes the church capitalist? Isn't it quite far fetched? We know that churches are filthy rich, but that's mostly because of hundreds of years hoarding and demanding tribute from people or excomulgating. Today that holds very little basis tbh. The church was corrupt in the past and it's still corrupt today, but it's far from a capitalist enterpirse or apparatus. After all... What do they sell? Capitalism is focusing on production and sales and as far as we know, the church might be a business, but it's sustained mostly on donations and tax exemptions.

I’m not arguing the point. I was translating Robert snark into English.

 

[Malagor the dank omen]

I’m not arguing the point. I was translating Robert snark into English.

So, Bob makes an extremely far-fetched comparison and he would still argue that the church serves a purpouse in Capitalism when they have practically nonexistent power. And it's all because of his retard boner for religion.

 

[The Valeyard]

I think he's saying that film critics need to be more diverse and if they were they would have liked Eternals. Robert being the rare straight white male who can appreciate it.

Which made me check, and no, Armond White has not yet reviewed the film.

Ah, right.

As usual the underlying point was lost because of Bob's inability to construct a concise sentence.

 

[Flexo]

So, Bob makes an extremely far-fetched comparison and he would still argue that the church serves a purpouse in Capitalism when they have practically nonexistent power. And it's all because of his exceptional individual boner for religion.

Worse. The phrase is "PROTESTANT work ethic" which is what really got capitalism kickstarted into overdrive.

Now you can really get into some historical minutiae from here, let's just simplify it that Catholics have a more complicated relationship with capitalism to the point I could drop a bunch of links to online fights over it right here, or just quote the current pope.

But where you see capitalism really take off and flourish is in protestant lands for many years.

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

The church was corrupt in the past and it's still corrupt today, but it's far from a capitalist enterpirse or apparatus.

"I am bound by dogma to believe that the Catholic Church is divine, but if I wasn't I would still believe it anyway, because no organisation that was run with the same levels of incompetence, idiocy and corruption as the Church that wasn't protected by God would last longer than a week." - Hilaire Belloc.

Seriously, the levels of corruption (and I'm not just talking about paedo priests - lots of money "goes missing" in the Church, and my current priest will hand invoices out whenever he gets any building work done purely because people will talk about him being corrupt otherwise) in the human element of the Catholic Church are and have always been immense. Michael Voris may be a grifter, but take a look at Church Militant any day of the week and one of the first things you'll see will probably be something about a scandal involving a priest.

 

[Lord of the Large Pants]

Worse. The phrase is "PROTESTANT work ethic" which is what really got capitalism kickstarted into overdrive.

Now you can really get into some historical minutiae from here, let's just simplify it that Catholics have a more complicated relationship with capitalism to the point I could drop a bunch of links to online fights over it right here, or just quote the current pope.

But where you see capitalism really take off and flourish is in protestant lands for many years.

Hell, I'm not even sure "Protestant" work ethic is accurate, even though that's the standard term. It really seems to be something unique to a very specific form of Calvinist theology.

The logic is something like "If you've been chosen by God for salvation, it will reflect in your earthly prosperity. Therefore if you're not prosperous, you're probably a filthy heretic. Work hard to prove you're not a filthy heretic!"

This is, of course, completely bonkers, like all things related to Calvinism.