Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[KEKMUHLORD]

I saw Bobs takes on the Lord of the Rings show and wanted to put my fist thru the monitor.

Movieblob might be the only lolcow on here who makes me truly MATI.

Dude literally cheers on the destruction of all source material and fandoms. Like a good corporate/political stooge.

 

[A Very Big Fish]

How do they have melanin when Middle Earth didn't have a fucking sun for years?

Also, since the stories are the hypothetical prehistory of Europe, and in the main books LotR & The Hobbit, seeing as the racial diversity has vanished, was their a fucking ethnic cleansing?

 

[Adamska]

Brainless Bobby never even read the Hobbit, much less LotR OR Silmarillion.

Him proving he's not a nerd is as obvious as this: These goblins are so stupid they don't know or care that Hobbits never even were beyond the Misty Mountains until the 3rd Age. Harfoots were brown, more like earth too, and were NOT indigenous to the Shire.

 

[TigerGoblin]

Spoiler: Star Wars old stuff

There actually WAS magnificent seven star wars story. And it wasnt on Tatooine. It was on Aduba-3. In the very old Marvel Comics of Star Wars. (how old? it was released before "The Empire Strikes Back")
The plot synopsis reads:

Han Solo and Chewbacca are hired by Ramiz, a moisture farmer on Aduba-3, to protect his village from a band of local thugs known as the Cloud-Riders, led by Serji-X Arrogantus. Han and Chewbacca hire six misfit spacers to help them with the task, including Don-Wan Kihotay, an old man who thinks he is a Jedi Knight, and Jaxxon, a rabbit-like Lepi with a mean disposition. Serji-X tries to convince Han to forget about his mission to protect the peasants and even offers him compensation...

It is an obvious 7 samurai or magnificent 7 ripoff. And I loved it very much as a kid.
I was actually exposed to those old comic books before even seeing the films and as a result I very much like them and their very pulpy feel more than anything else related to "Star Wars"

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

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He looks like a bearded version of Guillaume Labelle.

It didn't occur to me as soon as I saw those atrocious Amazon LOTR pictures earlier, but somewhere in the back of my mind, I already knew Bob and his orbiters would have the absolute worst takes about it.

I mean, there's the obvious "Tolkien was British and Middle-earth has clear British/European roots" angle to show that these characters are out of place, which that first reply pretty much states verbatim. You could also potentially argue that elves have to be light-skinned since they first came about during a period of eternal night, and thus wouldn't have become melanated individuals. Likewise with dwarves, also formed in the early ages and spending most of their time underground. (Source: I read the Silmarillion, something these illiterate fucks would never have had the patience for.)

But no, simple facts and rational thinking are too much for the woke crowd. Instead, the impeccable logic of our betters dictates that "elves aren't real" and "Tolkien is dead so fuck what he thought." One says that there are black people in England now, thus it's fine to include them, apparently thinking that black people were always commonplace there. Fuck, one of them even literally pulls a WE WUZ KANGZ argument by declaring Numenor = Egypt and thus black. I'd almost think it was parody if I wasn't sure they were 100% serious.

And while I know that Christopher Tolkien didn't much approve of the film adaptations of LOTR (especially when the studio stiffed the estate for royalties that they had to fight for), I'm sure that JRRT would have enjoyed them much more than whatever fanfiction Amazon is producing. They've already admitted they're adding their own OCs to the mix, so it's pretty much destined to suck balls.

The crime rate in Erebor and the Shire is about to skyrocket.

 

[Arthur Morgan]

Bobby kisses up another former "colleague", Film Brain.
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Buck's whining has always bugged me because he started Projector over a decade ago at this point and it never caught on. But he's still insistent that he's in the right for continuing it instead of the show that actually gets him views.

And by Bob's definition, they're still colleagues even though I don't think they've ever even met.

Brainless Bobby never even read the Hobbit, much less LotR OR Silmarillion.

Him proving he's not a nerd is as obvious as this: These goblins are so stupid they don't know or care that Hobbits never even were beyond the Misty Mountains until the 3rd Age. Harfoots were brown, more like earth too, and were NOT indigenous to the Shire.

He's seen the movies and skimmed the Wikipedia articles. That's exactly that same in his mind, which means it's the same in reality.

 

[Smithfield Ham]

Hey, you know what you do if you want more "diversity" in your fantasy setting?

You add it in organically in a way that makes sense and fits with canon. Y'know, like the heavily Ottoman-inspiried Haradrim? Maybe make a series about them rebelling against the remnants of Sauron or something?

 

[Agent Abe Caprine]

What gets me is that Robert Chipman believes he has any place in a future where intellectual ability is prized above all. His only actual useful function in such a world will be as a shitting, sobbing doorstop. Not that there will be any demand for such an object.

He has another use. Feeding an Ethiopian village for a week.

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

Brilliant idea, Bob. Let's go on another Globohomo Crusade. The last one in Afghanistan worked out so well.

 

[Woe-B-Gon (TM)]

Brilliant idea, Bob. Let's go on another Globohomo Crusade. The last one in Afghanistan worked out so well.

Can't get to a borderless utopia while America still exists, and the graveyard of empires didn't do the job right.

Your new favorite thing is trolling people on the social media platform that's most often prefixed with "I was forced to get an account on..."

Isn't that special.

Well, Trannies aren't the brightest bulbs
I bet this dumbfuck is using his real name and face on Linkedin

Real real (male) or headcanon "real" (female)?

 

[Positron]

I can't quite figure out the logical association between "I make sordid sex posts" and "I plan to succeed on my own terms".

Chris counsels another youngster who doubtless also plans to succeed on his own terms.

---

Bobby wants legal rights for non-Americans, but not "terrorists".

(The Federalist article)


Gazpacho is too healthy for this fat fuck.


???

Kayne West:


Football coach Mike McDaniel rebels against the progressive narrative: he doesn't identify as black; but rather strives to be a good person. Bobby mocks his look for his insouciance.

People in the thread comment that McDaniel is biracial, so he is damned if he does and damned if he doesn't.





James Gunn's latest brainchild, which Lesser Brother loves. Bobby too love it because it reflects the "lower middle-class American white male psyche" -- in other words, it is white trash bait. It seems to me Bobby considers Peacemaker a humanistic study of the dual decay of the suburban environ and tradition American patriotism. To Bobby surprise, James Gunn made even a violent white trash likeable.


Man collecting guns as an hobby is "toxic masculinity" and "life-station addiction".

Self-awareness: far away, so close!

Thinkers can't be racist. If you are an inventor and super-racist, then what you did had to be child's play, like putting together a chemistry kit.

So in the end, Bobby refuses to accept that White Dragon is a tech genius. In Bobby's estimation he is at best comparable to an "installer", and "engineer" like Lesser Brother.

 

[Ralph Barnhardt]

I can't quite figure out the logical association between "I make sordid sex posts" and "I plan to succeed on my own terms".

>loves talking about what he masterbates to in uncomfortable detail
>"Suck it up buttercup! I'm practicing radical self love and you're just gonna have to deal."
>Pushes away any sensible people with creepy coomer bullshit
>Left with only other creepy coomers
>Circle jerk feedback loop spools up
>Cries about no one caring about him because he's trans
>Good allies like Lesser Brother create an astroturf movement to save the endangered dick snipper
>Succeeded on his own terms

EDIT:
I didn't recognize the guy at first because he wasn't tweeting from his Salem Horror fest account. This is the guy that I'm betting on taking Lesser Brother's black cherry.

 

[Mr Processor]

Hey, you know what you do if you want more "diversity" in your fantasy setting?

You add it in organically in a way that makes sense and fits with canon. Y'know, like the heavily Ottoman-inspiried Haradrim? Maybe make a series about them rebelling against the remnants of Sauron or something?

Bob is happy they are attacking original Tolkien canon because he knows it makes the "wrong people" (or the wrong not-people) upset. That's as far as he's thought this through. He likes it when people are made upset as long as it isn't him. Besides it's not like they are messing with something important to a valuable canon like changing Mario's origin from Brooklyn to the Mushroom Kingdom.

I think if they ever make another live action Mario movie, Mario should be black. Luigi can stay Italian though. In fact, that would be the perfect way to do it.

 

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

Bobby has been stanning for Amazon's new LoTR series, and it is as much a canon-rape as you expect.

Who wants to bet Bobby has never actually read LoTR or watched it since the Fashionability of the original Trilogy passed

 

[Mola Ram]

Who wants to bet Bobby has never actually read LoTR or watched it since the Fashionability of the original Trilogy passed

I dunno, he's threatened on several occasions to do a "Really That Good" on the trilogy. I keep hoping he's too lazy to bother.

 

[Force and Character]

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???

Protip for Blob: if you run an idiomatic expression (like, say, "front and center") through Google Translate, you're going to look like a gibbering tard to both people who know the language and those who don't.

 

[King Dead]

Football coach Mike McDaniel rebels against the progressive narrative: he doesn't identify as black; but rather strives to be a good person. Bobby mocks his look for his insouciance.
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People in the thread comment that McDaniel is biracial, so he is damned if he does and damned if he doesn't.

Bob commenting negatively on anyone's appearance is the definition of pot and kettle.

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For those unaware of what Bobby's talking about, here's a clip:

I have nothing to say
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Even a peabrain can tell there's a big difference between the acrobatic saberfighting of the Prequels and...whatever the fuck this is. Bob hides behind his reply settings so he can't be called out on his stupidity. Either that, or he thinks he's made the ultimate insight and refuses to discuss it further. Whatever, Bob's retarded.

I dunno, he's threatened on several occasions to do a "Really That Good" on the trilogy. I keep hoping he's too lazy to bother.

If he did, I'm sure that there would be more Tolkien fans than just you and I on this board suffering simultaneous strokes. I'd rather not die before Bob, so I'll pray likewise.

 

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

I dunno, he's threatened on several occasions to do a "Really That Good" on the trilogy. I keep hoping he's too lazy to bother.

Sounds like a guy who never watched it and is just bleating the sheep line to me.

 

[Mr Processor]

Who wants to bet Bobby has never actually read LoTR or watched it since the Fashionability of the original Trilogy passed

Read LOTR? No matter what odds you give me that's a sucker's bet. I doubt Bob has read any long form novels. Well, he did claim to be a Judy Blume fan. I think he's lying about that, too.

 

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

Read LOTR? No matter what odds you give me that's a sucker's bet. I doubt Bob has read any long form novels. Well, he did claim to be a Judy Blume fan. I think he's lying about that, too.

He said Judy Blume got him laid so that is 100% a Lie because Bob..has not had sex with anything but his hand.