Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[Absolutego]

He'll never be able to maintain the separation of these twitter accounts (especially now that he's all but admitted he craves validation by unprivating the sperg account within a matter of hours), the Big Boy rhetoric around the announcement reeks of someone at the Escapist telling him to grow the fuck up already and get his social media under control, and he's stuck at home with nothing to consoom for the next month, at best.

Still predicting Firing Saga 2: Electric Boogaloo sometime around the summer. There's no way he doesn't throw a tantrum rivaling the one after the GamerGate SVU episode in the coming weeks.

 

[A Big Bumbling Black Man]

I can't imagine the exhaustion "progressive stack" people feel when they see Bob claiming to be a victim of "REAL *systemic* hardship" when he's a straight white vanilla virgin who gets low-effort (albeit dwindling) Youtube bux every month from the safety of his basement fartbox.
It's like that scene in The Jerk where Steve Martin says "I was born a poor black child!", but not as a joke.

Sadly my autism wouldn't let me get over how none of Peter's allies caught on to the drastic change in personality.

The Avengers notice something is up almost immediately and bring him in for testing.

Spoiler: More lore

Since this is shortly after the Secret Invasion they're primarily focused on seeing if Spider-man was replaced by a Skrull, so they kind of have horse-blinders on and aren't looking for minor deviations in brainwave patterns. Technically it's still 100% Peter's body and brain, after all.
Also, Otto was very lucky that Dr. Strange, Tony Stark, and Hank Pym were all absent from the testing, otherwise they would have probably been able to expose him. Even then, they put Spider-man on strict probation for his change in behavior.

 

[Doctor Placebo]

Robert has unlocked his personal twitter:
View attachment 1216161
Now everyone can see his wonderful tweets about the superior future and loathsome troglodytes.

Couldn't keep to himself for one day. Twitter is a helluva drug.

 

[BScCollateral]

Must be that "Boston Strong" thing I've heard so much about.

[Powerlevel: to my buddies in Boston, I'm pretty sure you think Bob is a faggot too. No offense.]

 

[Adamska]

Must be that "Boston Strong" thing I've heard so much about.

[Powerlevel: to my buddies in Boston, I'm pretty sure you think Bob is a faggot too. No offense.]

He's not even a Bostonian proper, he's from Lynn, a fucking suburb area filled with yuppies.

 

[King Dead]

SadBob wants his future back
View attachment 1216174

It's funny, Bob almost had a moment where I was actually agreeing with him for once, and then he went completely off the rails with his usual whining complaints and totally lost me. Like yeah, these uber-left "never let a crisis go to waste" types are pretty fucking stupid for demanding radical social change because of the Wu Flu, and I've also hated those "you can't have escapism because real life has problems" types too, so he's right to call them out for being morons. But then he has to go and one-up their hot takes with his standard "muh dreams, muh fyucha" bullshit, throwing in an implication that he had anything approaching hardship in his life beyond not getting sauce for his McNuggies.

Still, if I'm going to be perfectly honest, I'd rather have Bob in this situation than a tankie. At least Bob just sits around and complains, never affecting anyone else. Tankies could actually hurt people with their retarded ideas.

 

[Doctor Placebo]

It's funny, Bob almost had a moment where I was actually agreeing with him for once, and then he went completely off the rails with his usual whining complaints and totally lost me. Like yeah, these uber-left "never let a crisis go to waste" types are pretty fucking stupid for demanding radical social change because of the Wu Flu, and I've also hated those "you can't have escapism because real life has problems" types too, so he's right to call them out for being morons. But then he has to go and one-up their hot takes with his standard "muh dreams, muh fyucha" bullshit, throwing in an implication that he had anything approaching hardship in his life beyond not getting sauce for his McNuggies.

Still, if I'm going to be perfectly honest, I'd rather have Bob in this situation than a tankie. At least Bob just sits around and complains, never affecting anyone else. Tankies could actually hurt people with their exceptional ideas.

The only reason Bob can't hurt anyone with his ideas is because they're too damn autistic and he's too uncharismatic to get any support.

 

[Bolo]

Wait, so the wellfare commies are the ones precluding Robert from his jet-pack Utopia? Not the Trump red-necks?

But hey, he got the internet hugs he wanted so much:

So, Robert is playing up the same old hits huh? I wish just for once he would drop the superior future on hold facede and give us the real reason for his grief.. that he feels old, lonely and doesn't have the money, fame, prestige and women he thought he would get.

Nobody buys this "I wante the futuah to be ruled by the smart people who do arts and science!!!" bullshit, or that just because fucking Trump is president now the whole course of humanity is on stasis or some shit, that's ridiculous regardless of what you think about politics.

Also, this too busllshit.

First, can you set the phone ring or vibration to twitter notifications? And if can, why on fuck would anyone do that? Nobody, NOBODY makes important business on twitter, if you need to on top of something, you give people your number to reach you as fast as they can.

But, we know this is bullshit, he just want more follower faster. He needs to get the message out there about the superior future.

And last:

First, no it's not, it's a shit idea. No one really cares about Slinter, and they sure as fuck don't care when he was just a normal rat... what is the point of a story about mutant animals when they are not MUTANT!!!!!????? The Origins of the Ninja Turtles was a Daredevil spoof joke, to try to do more to expand the backstory into something "epic" more is just idiotic.

I'm aware that the modern TMNT comic do have a larger backstory now for the turtles, they are now reincarnations of medieval japanese kids, sons of a japanese ninja who is also reincarnated as slinter... yes..

But I'm also aware that those TMNT comic sell like wet farts... so what?

But if you think the pitch is so great Robert, then write the script fatass. The most useless thing in the industry you so oh much want to break in are these crappy "pop thing A meets pop thing B" elevator pitches. Everybody fancies themselves as a idea man, but few have the stones to do the heavy lifiting.

Heck, David Mamet goes a step further, he said everyone can write a great first act, because that is just the set up, the meat and potatoes though? few can deliver.

But nah, keep twitting your frustrations away, it's the only way you ever hope to be trully entretaining.

 

[Chan the Wizard]

Bob is legit terrified of a social revolution because he knows he’s an obsolete capitalist pig-dog and will be among the first against the wall. But, Bob, this is the first step to the glorious future! Of course there will be sacrifices, but it’s for the greater good. The greater good.

 

[Judge Dredd]

the modern TMNT comic do have a larger backstory now for the turtles

MovieBob would base this on the cartoon version he grew up with, maybe with a little of the modern shows if his niece watches it.

SadBob wants his future back

I don't even understand what he's saying. It starts with him being sad and wanting a hug, and ends with his usual "superior future" rage. I wonder if that's what he's like all the time and we just don't get to see it because the rage kicks in?

 

[Mola Ram]

I don't even understand what he's saying. It starts with him being sad and wanting a hug, and ends with his usual "superior future" rage. I wonder if that's what he's like all the time and we just don't get to see it because the rage kicks in?

That's a really good point. The mood swing is actually kind of unnerving, especially if it happened in real time and wasn't a preplanned rant. You start to wonder if this big ol' tard belongs in an institution.

 

[Adamska]

Splinter's origin story is more fitting for one episode of a show or a Gaiden series of books; it does not have enough interest and story to do much more than that. Bobby is an imbecile.

 

[Mola Ram]

Splinter's origin story is more fitting for one episode of a show or a Gaiden series of books; it does not have enough interest and story to do much more than that. Bobby is an imbecile.

Remember, this is the guy who freaked out over alterations to Super Mario's "lore," since it's so deep and important and intelligently developed, doncha know. He probably regards TMNT as on the level of the Mahabharata.

 

[TerminalTryHard]

Robert has unlocked his personal twitter:
View attachment 1216161
Now everyone can see his wonderful tweets about the superior future and loathsome troglodytes.

Jesus Christ that didn't take long.

This is why I think separating the accounts wasn't Bob's idea and is coming from some outside pressure. Bob can't help himself he's convinced that the world NEEDS to hear his opinions, you can see it with his ridiculously long tweet chains and his bloated videos that take forever to get to the point.

Anyone want to take bets on whether or not he can get his personal account verified?

 

[Mr. Manchester]

MovieBob would base this on the cartoon version he grew up with, maybe with a little of the modern shows if his niece watches it.


I don't even understand what he's saying. It starts with him being sad and wanting a hug, and ends with his usual "superior future" rage. I wonder if that's what he's like all the time and we just don't get to see it because the rage kicks in?

I can't make it out either, maybe his fat head is finally swelling to the point of malfunction.

 

[Chan the Wizard]

It’s insane rambling but I understand how Bob got there.
-I miss getting hugs from special needs niece, the only person who can stand me
-I want normal so I can consoom popcorn marvel movies
-the people I follow on twitter say there is no more normal, when this is over they want a change
-change is scary, what if I can’t consoom?
-it makes me feel better to compare them to people who get into prepping because of irrational fears
-I bet those troglodytes hate art and support Bernie!
-where’s my insulin?
-oh there’s the truck with my brunch of a “small” sampling of four of each item off of the McDonald’s menu

Basically, Bob, for all his superior future whining, is terrified of change.

 

[Lensherr]

“Dirtbag Left bad!”

“Me want gibs!”

 

[The tired cat]

First, no it's not, it's a shit idea. No one really cares about Slinter, and they sure as fuck don't care when he was just a normal rat... what is the point of a story about mutant animals when they are not MUTANT!!!!‽???? The Origins of the Ninja Turtles was a Daredevil spoof joke, to try to do more to expand the backstory into something "epic" more is just idiotic.

I'm aware that the modern TMNT comic do have a larger backstory now for the turtles, they are now reincarnations of medieval japanese kids, sons of a japanese ninja who is also reincarnated as slinter... yes..

But I'm also aware that those TMNT comic sell like wet farts... so what?

Wait, that's the so called origins for the turtles in the modern TMNT books? Okay, that's hilarious to me and for a good reason. During the 90's here in Eastern Europe they would sell these bootleg TMNT books (which was essential -take a script from a horror movie, insert turtles here somehow-) and one of their origins they were reincarnations of people who were murdered by Jason.

 

[Absolutego]

Wait, so the wellfare commies are the ones precluding Robert from his jet-pack Utopia? Not the Trump red-necks?

But hey, he got the internet hugs he wanted so much:

View attachment 1216388

So, Robert is playing up the same old hits huh? I wish just for once he would drop the superior future on hold facede and give us the real reason for his grief.. that he feels old, lonely and doesn't have the money, fame, prestige and women he thought he would get.

Nobody buys this "I wante the futuah to be ruled by the smart people who do arts and science!!!" bullshit, or that just because fucking Trump is president now the whole course of humanity is on stasis or some shit, that's ridiculous regardless of what you think about politics.

Also, this too busllshit.

View attachment 1216415

First, can you set the phone ring or vibration to twitter notifications? And if can, why on fuck would anyone do that? Nobody, NOBODY makes important business on twitter, if you need to on top of something, you give people your number to reach you as fast as they can.

But, we know this is bullshit, he just want more follower faster. He needs to get the message out there about the superior future.

And last:

View attachment 1216418

First, no it's not, it's a shit idea. No one really cares about Slinter, and they sure as fuck don't care when he was just a normal rat... what is the point of a story about mutant animals when they are not MUTANT!!!!‽???? The Origins of the Ninja Turtles was a Daredevil spoof joke, to try to do more to expand the backstory into something "epic" more is just idiotic.

I'm aware that the modern TMNT comic do have a larger backstory now for the turtles, they are now reincarnations of medieval japanese kids, sons of a japanese ninja who is also reincarnated as slinter... yes..

But I'm also aware that those TMNT comic sell like wet farts... so what?

But if you think the pitch is so great Robert, then write the script fatass. The most useless thing in the industry you so oh much want to break in are these crappy "pop thing A meets pop thing B" elevator pitches. Everybody fancies themselves as a idea man, but few have the stones to do the heavy lifiting.

Heck, David Mamet goes a step further, he said everyone can write a great first act, because that is just the set up, the meat and potatoes though? few can deliver.

But nah, keep twitting your frustrations away, it's the only way you ever hope to be trully entretaining.

1. I can totally see Bob as exactly the kind of weirdo who would turn on audio notifications for his twitter, and
2. Every single one of Bob's ideas for adapting his children's cartoons to mainstream media is stuck in the 2000's. Whether it's the Sonic movie that's basically Dances with Wolves, the Care Bear Paradise Lost idea, and this gritty Splinter movie, they all have the super-serious "what if thing in real world?" mindset trying to make everything gritty and real that reeks of insecurity and dominated the Brown Era of nerd culture before Big Bang Theory ruined everything in a different way. I thought we collectively got over that around the time the Avengers made it on screen, but Bob has remained committed to these retarded ideas throughout.

 

[The tired cat]

1. I can totally see Bob as exactly the kind of weirdo who would turn on audio notifications for his twitter, and
2. Every single one of Bob's ideas for adapting his children's cartoons to mainstream media is stuck in the 2000's. Whether it's the Sonic movie that's basically Dances with Wolves, the Care Bear Paradise Lost idea, and this gritty Splinter movie, they all have the super-serious "what if thing in real world?" mindset trying to make everything gritty and real that reeks of insecurity and dominated the Brown Era of nerd culture before Big Bang Theory ruined everything in a different way. I thought we collectively got over that around the time the Avengers made it on screen, but Bob has remained committed to these exceptional ideas throughout.

Isn't it weird that Bobcat is stuck in this 2000's gritty reboot stuff, an yet he dogpiles on DC for their stuff being dark and gritty? Hell, when it came to video games didn't get also bag on CoD games or other games for being dark and gritty, and not colorful like Mario games?