Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[Marissa Moira]

Robert, the point is you're a "professional" youtuber who doesn't understand white balance.
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He just doesn't understand how to film something and post production in general.

The Big Picture green background right next to his face with that expression looks like mario just let rip a huge gaseous fart.

 

[Sir Wesley Tailpipe]

That Mario jacket is cute. It'd look good in someone who's not a jerk.

IN someone? Disgusting.

 

[Pokemonquistador2]

Happy Easter Niggas!
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The thing that sticks out to me is Bob's trousers. Even if they were the right length for him, they're hanging way too low on his torso. I've noticed Bob has trouble with getting his pants the right length, whatever he wears, which means that he needs to get a pair of suspenders to keep his pants waist from slipping. He also needs to get dress shirts to wear with his blazers instead of polo shirts. If you Google Image search "mens blazers", you'll find plenty of pictures of men wearing dress shirts or collar-less T shirts, but no pictures of men wearing polo shirts with blazers. That's because it looks stupid. Bob probably eschews dress shirts because they aren't comfortably stretchy, but they'd give his outfit a much needed element of class. Why put all of this effort into getting a non-traditional suitjacket if you're going to cheap out on the undershirt?

Also Bob needs a tailor. Badly. The sleeves of his blazer extend all the way down to his knuckles. (And we've already noticed the disaster that is Bob's pants hem.) Every mid-level town or mall will have at least one tailor/alterations shop, and one doesn't have to be a nobleman to afford good tailoring. If you buy any kind of semiformal outfit off the rack, odds are good that you'll need to have it adjusted to your own bodily proportions. Doubly so if your proportions are as weird as Bob's is.

 

[Suburban Bastard]

Happy Easter Niggas!
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Jesus, it's like his chin is some gooey play-dough that's falling off.

 

[Sir Wesley Tailpipe]

The thing that sticks out to me is Bob's trousers. Even if they were the right length for him, they're hanging way too low on his torso. I've noticed Bob has trouble with getting his pants the right length, whatever he wears, which means that he needs to get a pair of suspenders to keep his pants waist from slipping. He also needs to get dress shirts to wear with his blazers instead of polo shirts. If you Google Image search "mens blazers", you'll find plenty of pictures of men wearing dress shirts or collar-less T shirts, but no pictures of men wearing polo shirts with blazers. That's because it looks stupid. Bob probably eschews dress shirts because they aren't comfortably stretchy, but they'd give his outfit a much needed element of class. Why put all of this effort into getting a non-traditional suitjacket if you're going to cheap out on the undershirt?

Also Bob needs a tailor. Badly. The sleeves of his blazer extend all the way down to his knuckles. (And we've already noticed the disaster that is Bob's pants hem.) Every mid-level town or mall will have at least one tailor/alterations shop, and one doesn't have to be a nobleman to afford good tailoring. If you buy any kind of semiformal outfit off the rack, odds are good that you'll need to have it adjusted to your own bodily proportions. Doubly so if your proportions are as weird as Bob's is.

As funny as the shop of Robert as the Hamburglar is, he’s really built like Grimace.

 

[Doctor Placebo]

Damn! That stream was 10.5 hours! You know it makes it hard on folks to jump around on the timeline then, MauLer.

Anyway, Bob segment begins at the 1:05:00ish mark. Hopefully the timestamp below works. Like I said before, the first 5-10 min are definitely worth watching just to see others catch up to all the inside jokes this board has been savoring for pages now.

Some angel of mercy thoroughly timestamped the whole thing on Youtube, and while MauLer is too much of a lazy fuck to do it himself, he at least had the decency to pin the comment.

Holy fuck, that rant by Robert at the beginning of his video is well worth listening to. Where he says he's been holding onto deep anger and resentment from being bullied when he was young for which he's been obsessed with revenge, says he knows it's the worst way he could deal with his feelings, then ends it with "Whatever" before saying that the world is lucky he has shitty movies to review on his shitty channel because otherwise he'd totally be leading a putsch against Trump to take over the world and make all the jawks and Republicans pay. He tries to pass the last bit off as a joke, but the thing is, we see what you're like on social media Bobby boy, and we know that you're not really joking. Robert continues to prove that any parody of him won't long outmatch the real thing.

Ladies better be careful if he ever works up the courage to take up speed dating or something. He'll turn into Titan from Megamind the moment he gets rejected or learns that a woman he likes voted for Trump.

The thing that sticks out to me is Bob's trousers. Even if they were the right length for him, they're hanging way too low on his torso. I've noticed Bob has trouble with getting his pants the right length, whatever he wears, which means that he needs to get a pair of suspenders to keep his pants waist from slipping.

They're also horribly wrinkled, which makes it obvious he doesn't bother to hang them up, fold them and put them in a dresser, or iron them before wearing them. He leaves them balled loosely, probably on the floor with several empty beer cans on top of them, until he needs to dust them off and put them on for special occasions.

 

[LordofCringe7206]

Robert, the point is you're a "professional" youtuber who doesn't understand white balance.
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I love how hyper-defensive Bob is about people tweeting photos of himself at him. It's doesn't even have to be posed as being negative, he just automatically assumes it to be so.

A sign that he ultimately does see on some level how ridiculous of a person he is.

 

[Jack Awful]

Damn! That stream was 10.5 hours! You know it makes it hard on folks to jump around on the timeline then, MauLer.

Anyway, Bob segment begins at the 1:05:00ish mark. Hopefully the timestamp below works. Like I said before, the first 5-10 min are definitely worth watching just to see others catch up to all the inside jokes this board has been savoring for pages now.

I gave up watching. They fucking dedicate 40 minutes to a 5 minute video. They'll watch 30 seconds and then try to riff on it for 5 minutes. It's so grating that once I gave up I watched the original Moviebob upload instead.

I'd never seen it and it explains SO MUCH about Moviebob's personality. He flat out admits he still wants revenge on his bullies and that it's sad and unhealthy, but dismisses it as "whatever". He knows he's evil but doesn't care and doesn't want to change, which is pretty despicable.

To summarize the video: "the idea of nerds being bullied by jocks because the nerds are superior and the jocks are afraid is a fictional power fantasy... but it's also 100% true because Michael Jordan is beloved by all and Bill Gates is hated, even though I have no source on that. Also, if X-Men were real, I'd happily join Magneto and kill all the dumb bully jock inferior humans!"

I used to think the "Moviebob hates middle america because it represented his bullies" thing was hyperbolic conjecture, but he explains it himself.

 

[Mola Ram]

I gave up watching. They fucking dedicate 40 minutes to a 5 minute video. They'll watch 30 seconds and then try to riff on it for 5 minutes. It's so grating that I eventually gave up and watched the original Moviebob upload instead.

These guys are interesting but they ain't 10 hours' worth of interesting. Edit, edit, edit!

 

[Tasty Tatty]

IN someone? Disgusting.

Ja, Excuse me, Yo speako el Espaniol.

 

[Benisbro]

Whoa, that Easter pic finally led me to understand Kinoblob’s malformed facial structure.

See a great many fat people are born fat and/or (literally) big boned. That is, they’re broad shouldered and have a chin to match. Ironically Chris Chipman is an obvious example of this, and so despite being balding and middle aged he actually resembles a normal person.

Not our blorb though, he’s very clearly rather thinly built with fat just unceremoniously piled on. His face looks so horrible because he has a long, thin head with only his hefty jowls giving horizontal depth.

Add in years and years of sedentary non-exercise and you have yourself a fine anomaly: a man both freakishly lanky and morbidly obese.
The perfect consoomer.

 

[Bolo]

man that magneto video takes me back... I think this video was one of the first time I've thought "humm something isn't quite right with this guy".

I used to enjoy Robert reviews, not much else from him, he had his political jabs here and there, but whatever, as long as he reanted about movies it was fine.

But what surprised me the most about the Magneto was that Robert kinda sucks when he wants to make a point. He spend most of his time talking about bullying withou understanding the very basic, kids are cruel and pick on whoever looks meek and doesn't fight back, they may use racist or homophobe slurs, but the point ain't much about hating the "different", but picking on the weak, and even so, judging how Robert speaks about, it is as if his school was filled with Stephen King bullies.

Then he goes on about how "Nerds" and "nerd culture" have this fantasy that they were picked on because they were better than others, you know the bullshit moms tell their shitty kids that the means bullies will be the ones cleaning their pools, and it seems he is talking as if it is just a fantasy that it isn't very good to indulge with in real life, which is a sound position.

But then he gets to X-men, and talks about how society values jocks over intellect, this notion that he has that the mediocre masses hates the smart (like himself), and to prove by example, this simpleton mentions how people hate Bill gates, but love Michael Jordan... which just blows my mind and I'm not gonna waste time explaining how otherwordly stupid this is. But the point being is that he trully believes society as a whole hates the "superiors".

And he finishes that segment by throwing his safe line, it's just a hyperbole, but finishes saying that if mutants were real, and if he was one of them, he would side with Magneto.... but his arguments just a minute ago seemed to be against bringuing a fictional power fantasy into your life... the whole video feels disjointed.

Funny thing is, not long ago some randos on twitter brought up this video against Robert, and he said he thinks this is one of his worst works and he doesn't stand by it... and yet it sure does have a lot of stuff he is still repeating to this day...

 

[ditto]

Add in years and years of sedentary non-exercise and you have yourself a fine anomaly: a man both freakishly lanky and morbidly obese.
The perfect consoomer.

That explains his spindly froglike legs.

 

[Dr Naomi Hunter]

That Mario jacket is cute. It'd look good in someone who's not a jerk.

I actually saw one out in the wild in a department store, however it was only sized for children. Not a 40 year old angry blob.

 

[Intelligent Calcium]

Absolute power move.

 

[Marissa Moira]

They got it wrong in the Efap video

X-Men wasn't based on the civil rights movement, it was based on the book Slan by A. E. Van Vogt. Slan was about a mutant named Jommy Cross who's mother is killed and he's hunted by assassins sent by the dictator Kier Gray. It's revealed in the book that Jommy is supposed to inherit special technology(designed by his father) to save the other Mutants from extinction.

Now X-Men came out around the time of the civil rights era but Slan was written in the 1940's. Some people draw comparisons between X-men and civil rights due to the time period, but anti-mutant groups were also in Slan and not only that every overly political soapbox story the x-men did early on bombed fucking hard. It's why Stan Lee said (and I'm paraphrasing) "keep all political stuff in the background and not the forefront". The X-men abandoned the political stuff very early on and the MLK and Malcom X comparisons for Xavier and Magneto also don't hold up.

The readers were not interested in being preached to even back in the 1960's.

 

[The tired cat]

They got it wrong in the Efap video

X-Men wasn't based on the civil rights movement, it was based on the book Slan by A. E. Van Vogt. Slan was about a mutant named Jommy Cross who's mother is killed and he's hunted by assassins sent by the dictator Kier Gray. It's revealed in the book that Jommy is supposed to inherit special technology(designed by his father) to save the other Mutants from extinction.

Now X-Men came out around the time of the civil rights era but Slan was written in the 1940's. Some people draw comparisons between X-men and civil rights due to the time period, but anti-mutant groups were also in Slan and not only that every overly political soapbox story the x-men did early on bombed fucking hard. It's why Stan Lee said (and I'm paraphrasing) "keep all political stuff in the background and not the forefront". The X-men abandoned the political stuff very early on and the MLK and Malcom X comparisons for Xavier and Magneto also don't hold up.

The readers were not interested in being preached to even back in the 1960's.

Wait, I thought X-men was more an allegory to being Gay or something, 'cause in most Xmen version I recall someone going "Couldn't you NOT be a mutant?" or something along those lines.

 

[Laughingjoke2]

Blobo and a lot of SJW types think the X-Men were always this statement on civil rights but by Stan Lee's own admission he created the X-Men and Mutants because he tired of creating origin stories for how people got powers. The whole civil rights thing happen by pure happenstance due to the era the book came out in the team was billed as the Stangest Teens back then with the world viewing them as Frankensteins. Claremont in the 70's and 80's created the idea mutants are an allegory for all minorities.

 

[Mola Ram]

Wait, I thought X-men was more an allegory to being Gay or something, 'cause in most Xmen version I recall someone going "Couldn't you NOT be a mutant?" or something along those lines.

That came later, though not so late as the movies. That really got started with the Legacy Virus in early 90s, left as revenge after the death of Cable's clone Stryfe. It was very heavyhanded allegory, a disease that only struck mutants and made them waste away, and it was in every fucking issue for years. At least, that's how I remember it -- it had a way of creeping into most storylines, anyway.

 

[Bolo]

People that hold the X-men to the status of being a political driven book are the same ones that either don't read X-men or want to defend the recent crappy preachy X-men books marvel has been putting out, before they turned into pod people in the latest reboot.

I'm not the biggest X-men guy, I've only read the most classic storylines and Grant Morrison's run, and on those, humans and their relationship with Mutants had very little to do what made X-men a sucess. Yeah, yeah "God loves, man Kills", everybody talks about this clunky Graphic novel, but let's be real, people bought X-men for the Dark Phoenix saga.

It's no secret that the X-men were third tier heroes before Chris Claremont took over, and if there is one thing Claremont can do is to turn a super hero comic into a soap opera, and what is the most important thing in a soap opera?

Who is fucking who, and who wants to fuck who? Seriously, the characters started fucking around and having drama relationships left and right.

And Claremont combined that with Space adventures, lands with dinossaurs and giant robots... oh yeah, you know the Sentinels, eventually they cut the ties with the evil govement man who hate mutants and they just become sentient machines that want to take over the world.

That is not to say that the bigoted humans were not part of the comics... but they had such small roles in the overall that the whole civil rights thing is a strech at best.