Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

How will Bob react to seeing the Mario film?


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"More than one thing" ? Let me guess, you read Animal Farm and enjoyed the talking critters.
Reading this reminds me of a brief bit from Step by Step, a 1990s family sitcom. I do not know the episode in which it occurred*, but I recall the nerdy son of the show's main family being asked to write a book report on Animal Farm his older brother. Said nerd's sister decides to play a prank on the older brother, but instead of writing a summary for the book, she and the nerdy kid play a prank by writing the lyrics to "Old MacDonald" as part of the book report. I can imagine Moviebob's book report looking similar:

"Old MacDonald haad an Animal Faam, E-I-E-I-O.
And on this Animal Faam, he haad some pigs, E-I-E-I-O."


*Took a few minutes to find, but I think the episode in question is "The Paper Chase" (season 3, episode 4).
 
Also, gotta love the "Me, the guy who read more than one thing by Orwell, and also several other books". You might have read the books, but looks like Robert missed the obvious on 1984, the point is that EVERYBODY is getting the boot in the face, and that is why Orwell never bothered to show anybody from the inner party besides O'Brien, who as much eloquence he has shown on his "arguments" and display of power and manipulation, in the end he was just yet another fanatic to the state, and if you look at the constant backstabing and executions between high ranking party officials in the URSS and Stalin's miserable paranoid life he led till his end, then you see that a totalitarianism State is just a self sustained machine that feeds on people and NOBODY WINS.

So yeah, brag all you want about "reading books" Robert, but the flex doesn't work when you can't even grap the basics of the story.
Imagine a book/movie where a Moviebob stand-in dreams of an authoritarian government taking power so the rural folk he hates will be punished.
His dreams then come true in a revolution/coup, and he finds himself in a position where he has all his needs taken care of but all he has to do is tweet out hot takes which support the ruling regime.
However, as time progresses and internal politics intensify he finds it harder and harder to shit out hot takes without accidentally saying something that could get him disappeared.
He soon realizes that, with a few additional oppressive policies, rural folk he despises so much are basically left to do what they have always done: provide food for the cities.
Eventually, he too is cancelled for accidentally tweeting a problematic wrong-think, and is taken away to a gulag.
It ends with him wishing for a capitalist democratic governance, where intellectuals like him would be free to shit out any hot take they want, before being permanently deplatformed.
For the life of me, I still don't understand why Bob gives such a full-throated defense of troons. It seems to be part of his cargo cult understanding of Science™, where he legitimately thinks that chopping off a guy's dick and putting him on the wrong hormones for life turns him into a beautiful maiden. Biology don't work like that, champ.
He, among other proggie/mainstream "science" worshippers, believe that technology > biology.
Ergo, for them its only a matter of time until the science-magicians whip up a magic surgery that can turn men into women, thus rendering chromosomes and biological sex determination obsolete.
For them, biology is merely a set of rule/hold-backs which exist only to be overcome by the all-powerful tech priests, and nothing more.

Blobert is more all-in on the human conscience/robot body kind of shit; but you also see this with radfems who think science will one day let them reproduce without needing men.
 
Even without Orwell's pro-life sympathies I have a feeling that he'd hate that book because the main character romanticises the white working class and detests Ravelston, who's meant to symbolise middle-class champagne socialists like Blob.
I imagine he'd hate most of Orwell's output. The depiction of authoritarianism in 1984 , the allegorical complexity of Animal Farm (complex for Bob, anyway - a pig waving a sign reading I REPRESENT TROTSKY would still be a bit fast for him), or... hell, it's hard to figure out what part of The Road to Wigan Pier would piss him off first: The praise for the country over the urban blight, the positive depictions of men doing physical labor, or perhaps the depiction of the bloated and dim Mrs. Brooker on page 2 would hit too close to home. But if he made it a bit farther he would find a rather damning indictment that you'd almost think Orwell wrote for him, given the phrasing of the 2nd half of the paragraph:

It is not long since conditions in the mines were worse than they are now. There are still living a few very old women who in their youth have worked underground, with the harness round their waists, and a chain that passed between their legs, crawling on all fours and dragging tubs of coal. They used to go on doing this even when they were pregnant. And even now, if coal could not be produced without pregnant women dragging it to and fro, I fancy we should let them do it rather than deprive ourselves of coal. But-most of the time, of course, we should prefer to forget that they were doing it. It is so with all types of manual work; it keeps us alive, and we are oblivious of its existence. More than anyone else, perhaps, the miner can stand as the type of the manual worker, not only because his work is so exaggeratedly awful, but also because it is so vitally necessary and yet so remote from our experience, so invisible, as it were, that we are capable of forgetting it as we forget the blood in our veins. In a way it is even humiliating to watch coal-miners working. It raises in you a momentary doubt about your own status as an 'intellectual' and a superior person generally. For it is brought home to you, at least while you are watching, that it is only because miners sweat their guts out that superior persons can remain superior. You and I and the editor of the Times Lit. Supp., and the poets and the Archbishop of Canterbury and Comrade X, author of Marxism for Infants--all of us really owe the comparative decency of our lives to poor drudges underground, blackened to the eyes, with their throats full of coal dust, driving their shovels forward with arms and belly muscles of steel.
 
Reading this reminds me of a brief bit from Step by Step, a 1990s family sitcom. I do not know the episode in which it occurred*, but I recall the nerdy son of the show's main family being asked to write a book report on Animal Farm his older brother. Said nerd's sister decides to play a prank on the older brother, but instead of writing a summary for the book, she and the nerdy kid play a prank by writing the lyrics to "Old MacDonald" as part of the book report. I can imagine Moviebob's book report looking similar:

"Old MacDonald haad an Animal Faam, E-I-E-I-O.
And on this Animal Faam, he haad some pigs, E-I-E-I-O."


*Took a few minutes to find, but I think the episode in question is "The Paper Chase" (season 3, episode 4).
I imagine it to be that episode of Seinfeld where George struggles to read Breakfast at Tiffany's, watches the movie, and talks about how Audrey Hepburn gets with George Peppard at the book club
 
I imagine he'd hate most of Orwell's output. The depiction of authoritarianism in 1984 , the allegorical complexity of Animal Farm (complex for Bob, anyway - a pig waving a sign reading I REPRESENT TROTSKY would still be a bit fast for him), or... hell, it's hard to figure out what part of The Road to Wigan Pier would piss him off first: The praise for the country over the urban blight, the positive depictions of men doing physical labor, or perhaps the depiction of the bloated and dim Mrs. Brooker on page 2 would hit too close to home. But if he made it a bit farther he would find a rather damning indictment that you'd almost think Orwell wrote for him, given the phrasing of the 2nd half of the paragraph:
Not that Bob did actually read any Orwell, but keep in mind his tweet basically amounted to "Actually Big Brother is Good!". The entire point of 1984 is how Big Brother is NOT good, and how it manipulates people into just giving up and going along with it, and KGBloberto's hot fucking take was a Big Brother style government would be great if its people he doesn't like getting oppressed.
You can't guarantee any of the books would piss him off because he'd still find ways to sympathize with the antagonist and any horrible fate that befalls anyone he would giggle as he imagines it happening to Mayo Ghouls.
 
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Übermensch Bob does it again
 

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The most crossover-prone franchise on television crosses over. I didn't realize there was a god of mindnumbing status quo. Hell's sake, I hear they crossed over with WWE wrestling about five years ago. (And if the bad guy wasn't the Shockmaster, I will be very disappointed.)
They technically had 3-4 WWE crossover movies (one of them involved time travel into a post-apocalyptic future with the Jetsons) and they also had a crossover with Supernatural an KISS
This is one of my problems with modern entertainment. Too many crossovers. I know crossover stories are nothing new and I like the occasional crossover but frankly it’s getting old.
 
This is one of my problems with modern entertainment. Too many crossovers. I know crossover stories are nothing new and I like the occasional crossover but frankly it’s getting old.
One crossover that will assuredly never happen: Moviebob collaborating with online content providers who have moral, character, and intellectual standards above zero.
 
This is one of my problems with modern entertainment. Too many crossovers. I know crossover stories are nothing new and I like the occasional crossover but frankly it’s getting old.
Way back in the heady days of the early 00's, some of the Cartoon Network's showrunners would occasionally acknowledge the other shows on the network through little nods (for example, in the Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy, the job of the Grim Reaper is taken over by Numbah Three from Codename: Kids Next Door.) Not every show had this; Samurai Jack, to my knowledge, did not. But they got around the crossover issue by cleverly utilizing the bumpers between shows. Some would be about a single show, while others would feature small crossovers between shows. In this way, they could have crossovers without actually having crossovers.


Bob, the eternal consoomer that he is, gets pathetically excited when two or more products he consooms get a crossover. For him, it must be like watching Naomi Wu having a threesome with Princess Peach and Black Widow.
 
Way back in the heady days of the early 00's, some of the Cartoon Network's showrunners would occasionally acknowledge the other shows on the network through little nods (for example, in the Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy, the job of the Grim Reaper is taken over by Numbah Three from Codename: Kids Next Door.) Not every show had this; Samurai Jack, to my knowledge, did not. But they got around the crossover issue by cleverly utilizing the bumpers between shows. Some would be about a single show, while others would feature small crossovers between shows. In this way, they could have crossovers without actually having crossovers.


Bob, the eternal consoomer that he is, gets pathetically excited when two or more products he consooms get a crossover. For him, it must be like watching Naomi Wu having a threesome with Princess Peach and Black Widow.
>be bob
>watching latest MCU product
>stronk female heroes battling latest Thanos rip-off
>can't beat him without additional help
>portal opens from above
>"It's a me! Mario!"
>The entire US Eastern Seaboard is instantly destroyed in the ensuing nuclear nerdgasm coomsumption
 
Damn. Ryan all but called out moviebob by name in this video.

Part 3. Nerds (in case you want to skip to it)

Way back in the heady days of the early 00's, some of the Cartoon Network's showrunners would occasionally acknowledge the other shows on the network through little nods (for example, in the Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy, the job of the Grim Reaper is taken over by Numbah Three from Codename: Kids Next Door.) Not every show had this; Samurai Jack, to my knowledge, did not. But they got around the crossover issue by cleverly utilizing the bumpers between shows. Some would be about a single show, while others would feature small crossovers between shows. In this way, they could have crossovers without actually having crossovers.


Bob, the eternal consoomer that he is, gets pathetically excited when two or more products he consooms get a crossover. For him, it must be like watching Naomi Wu having a threesome with Princess Peach and Black Widow.
It finally happened in the comics - yes even with Samurai Jack they had the Super Secret Crisis War.
 
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Way back in the heady days of the early 00's, some of the Cartoon Network's showrunners would occasionally acknowledge the other shows on the network through little nods (for example, in the Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy, the job of the Grim Reaper is taken over by Numbah Three from Codename: Kids Next Door.) Not every show had this; Samurai Jack, to my knowledge, did not. But they got around the crossover issue by cleverly utilizing the bumpers between shows. Some would be about a single show, while others would feature small crossovers between shows. In this way, they could have crossovers without actually having crossovers.


Bob, the eternal consoomer that he is, gets pathetically excited when two or more products he consooms get a crossover. For him, it must be like watching Naomi Wu having a threesome with Princess Peach and Black Widow.
Samurai Jack had a few. One that gets brought up usually is the ruins of PPG's Townsville showing up in an episode.
Samurai Jack.jpg
 
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