Careercow Robert Pelloni / Bob's Game / The nD

[butt in trouble]

Wow, Bob is starting to show proto-Wizard/predator qualities, in addition to his jillion other mental problems.

He's also taken a quite a liking to directly comparing himself to god.

 

[Jaimas]

I'd like to start this post by first saying that I really do like indie games, and small development teams. Some of the most exciting and refreshing games I've ever played have been from small teams, indie groups, or single developers. Look at Dwarf Fortress, which simulates hairy fucks at near the cellular level while offering fluid mechanics for lava, water, blood, spit, and vomit (if they are at sufficient enough depths to require simulating). Check out the boringly named Meridian: New World for an entirely new modern RTS game developed by a single dude. Hell, check out Gone Home, which hack "Game Journalists" tried to convince people turned "gaming on it's head" by being a FPS that you don't shoot muslims or aliens or anything ever actually - it wasn't a game changer, but for people who like mood and story and art design over twitch mechanics it's really good!

Then you have Bob.

Bob, the diva developer who brought Kotaku such wonderous page hits that they just kept reporting on his stupid antics. Now mind you, as far as I know the examples below are some of the only references to this time available. He keeps re-writing and changing and revising his webpage, so much of this information is lost to the winds. We just have hacks like Owen Good braying about it "being in [Reggie's] court" so they can attempt to drum up discussion. That doesn't distract from the reality of the situation: Robert Pelloni is an untalented huckster who refuses to join society and get a real job.

Bob "staged a protest" against Nintendo by "locking himself in a room for 100 days". Let's look at what he had to say about this! What are Bob's reasons for locking himself in a fart closet to huff his own farts?



Mind you, if memory serves, at the time this went live he was living in his Uncle's shotgun house to work on this. Financially stable commercial addresses is a huge stretch for what he was actually doing. And please don't forget that most people realize if they "haven't heard something" from an application they submitted 17 weeks prior, that probably means they didn't get the fucking job. But it's okay, since Bob has no experience with work, with working in general, with jobs, with running a company, with development, with coding, with leasing office space, or with anything. He's had 15,000 hours of development time put in his egostroke project, doncha know!

So he's shunned. Nintendo doesn't want him. Reggie refuses to talk to him. He won't get an SDK because he's created a shitty game for the wrong hardware with no marketing appeal and refuses to let people play or see it. What's gonna happen in his fart closet protest?





Because nothing says, "hamfisted protest" like "secret messages and hints" displayed in an LCD ticker. There's no WAY this could be an abortion of an attempt at viral marketing through an ARG that no one cared about! Luckily he didn't have to do anything drastic for attent-

lel. He "trashed his room" and broke everything, and then some nerds on reddit called his sister who called the cops who busted in to find him perfectly fine and upset that he was caught being a naughty sperg unsupervised.

Nintendo didn't even acknowledge him, and no one the world over gave a shit. What's a diva to do? Well, why not let him explain it himself!


And now we have today. Where a pissy little bitch still refuses to grow up and get a job, and is still trying to pitch his game that no one wanted or cared about. A Kickstarter Project with a 10k limit and 45 days to meet it, that hasn't even hit the halfway point at nearly halfway to go. This is going to continue, forever, until Bob eventually dies because he's determined to make money from it, even if it costs him everything he has to do it.

In conclusion, a Video Game version of Gloria Tesch.

CWCki, you're too good to me when it comes to providing me with something to look at in a mix of abject fascination and pants-shitting terror.

 

[Super Collie]

Child molestation, bestiality, and terrible hentai. This guy's admissions reads like the absolute worst Post Secret book ever.

Yeah. Bob's Game is going to be real great. I can feel it.

 

[GRANDnumberofMULTIPLES]

Of all the lies in his Kickstarter, this is my favorite.

In 2008, after demoing it to Nintendo and turning down a job offer (I'd rather work on my own game!), I showed it on the internet in hopes that I would attract some publishers. Several of them were interested! After deciding on one and moving near their headquarters in New Jersey, unfortunately, Nintendo was hesitant to license me- even though I had an office, funds, and met all the qualifications. I really just wanted to get my hands on the official SDK so I could keep programming on the DS, or decide on a different platform, but they were stringing me along and I didn't understand why.

MY UNCLE WORKS FOR NINTENDO. I HAVE A PIKACHU. I CAN'T SHOW YOU. IT'S TOP SECRET.

 

[Mechanism Eight]

...H-How does someone like this exist, thinking they're amazing beyond belief while having literally accomplished NOTHING?!?

I don't know what to say. This guy makes me feel violent. Like, I actually want to hurt something he's so incomprehensibly stupid.

Looking at his site, I can tell by the length of it that he's a windbag. Why the fuck would anyone write so much of a personalized, glorified, and made-up autobiography when they've done nothing of note? At this point, I'm surprised he doesn't consider himself legitimately immortal and unable to die on top of all of his other delusions... Or at least, we haven't heard of that yet. The depth of his delusions is so much that it's consumed what was once a human being, and at this point, one just might be hard-pressed to call him even a fraction of that, as all that's left is the hideous, rotten wreckage of his bloated corpse-like pipedreams that still continues to fester, rot and grow...

No individual with any form of talent or knowledge of what creates good fiction, hell, good media of any sort, would have held onto such childish, overblown fantasies of something becoming an enormous franchise amassing millions upon millions of dollars. And yet he acts like he should be remembered forever, like he's some kind of unsung hero that dared to fight against the oppressive people who put him down because his head's so fucking far up his ass he's become a fucking klein bottle of digestive tract.

Let me say that again, just because it is the best way I can think of to describe him:

This guy's head is so far up his own ass, he's become a fucking klein bottle of digestive tract.

 

[John Titor]

thanks, i'll have to check that shit out, it's weird seeing first-party characters in games i'm totally unaware of, especially when it comes to old-school shit.

back on topic: holy shit, it's 1/4 of the way to funding. I have to wonder how many people are actually hyped for this game and how many people just want to watch the inevitable train-wreck.

Also, looking through that ED article, I found this video rather interesting:

Not only does it display how much of a manchild he is, but apparently the ds version of the game was (at one point at least) somewhat functional.

I'm amazed that he even has friends that are putting up with his bullshit.

 

[XYZpdq]

I remember this guy being an asshat on insert credit or that other site a thousand years ago.

Glad to see he's still at it.

 

[MrsFrizzle]

That poor cat, living in a car with a crazy man. I'm glad it escaped!

 

[He Sets Me On Fire]

"bob's game" - stage 80 - "The Meeting"

Wow. Just ... wow. When you set up a straw man villain who comes across as rational, level-headed, and practical compared to your self-insert hero, you really need to reconsider the presentation of your argument.

 

[ASoulMan]

Basically he's a spergy game designer who has his panties in a bundle because Nintendo turned down his offer to make his version of Sonichu.

 

[Shokew]

That strawman CEO was more right about things than Bob ever will be - in ANYTHING IRL.

 

[Cure Quanta]

Wow. Just ... wow. When you set up a straw man villain who comes across as rational, level-headed, and practical compared to your self-insert hero, you really need to reconsider the presentation your argument.

Well, at least he's right when he says there's no devs like him out there. Most solo indie devs aren't, yanno, lolcows whose dreams run on Orkish "clap your hands if you believe"-ium.

 

[c-no]

Well, at least he's right when he says there's no devs like him out there. Most solo indie devs aren't, yanno, lolcows whose dreams run on Orkish "clap your hands if you believe"-ium.

Even an obnoxious indie dev like Phil Fish managed to make a game that didn't run on the Orkish "your hands if you believe"-ium which was also released. Robert on the other hand just wanted to release his game on the DS for whatever reason which eventually lead him to seeing Nintendo as some evil corporation of people in suits as shown in the video He Sets Me On Fire posted.

 

[Cure Quanta]

Even an obnoxious indie dev like Phil Fish managed to make a game that didn't run on the Orkish "your hands if you believe"-ium which was also released. Robert on the other hand just wanted to release his game on the DS for whatever reason which eventually lead him to seeing Nintendo as some evil corporation of people in suits as shown in the video He Sets Me On Fire posted.

Yeah, agreed, but you can be obnoxious and still know enough about what you're doing to be a Phil Fish-like figure, even to the point where you're an entitled, bitchy prick like he is.

But he still at least made Fez, and that is a game that exists and was published. And people actually bought it, which counts for something, even if by this time I forgot who he is and what Fez was, and had to remind myself with a quick Google search of Fish's name.

Bob Bob's Game Bob Game Game's Bob Bob's Bob here has none of that. He's closer to being like Good Ol' CWC than I'd have feared, at least in having a bunch of issues including a sense of self-importance inflated like a weather balloon,some weird ideas on relationships with people, particularly the opposite sex (Bob Clone Army, anyone?), and a disasterpiece that he's worked on for years that's all about him and how important his life supposedly is.

 

[ChurchOfGodBear]

I've always been amazed at how the selling point to Bob's Game was always that was a game MADE BY ONE PERSON!!!!ZOMG111

For a guy who thinks he knows everything about video games, he has no concept of how tons of games are made by single programmers... Not just RPG Maker titles either, but actual creators working with assembly or C++ or any other language.

It's a given that Bob doesn't grasp how unimportant he is in the world... That's LOLcow step #1... But how can he not understand game design when he's based his whole persona around it?

 

[GRANDnumberofMULTIPLES]

But how can he not understand game design when he's based his whole persona around it?

With people like that, I'd really have to say it boils down to the Dunning-Kruger effect. It's essentially your own failure to assess your own goddamn incompetence. Too stupid to realize you're stupid. It's an overestimation of how good you are at something and actually believing it.

I see it a lot in writing, art, game design. Like the kid who discovered RPG maker for the first time and shuts down your criticism with "Well I don't see YOOOUUUU making a video game!"

 

[Smutley]

A random list of released games made by one person teams:

Spelunky
Cave Story
Beat Hazard
Dust: An Elysian Tail
Minecraft (when it started out)
Dwarf Fortress
VVVVVV
Retro City Rampage
Lone Survivor
Another World
Papers, Please
Five Frights at Denny's

Games by Bob after 15,000+ hours of work:
None

I'm just gonna say it - Bob and Phil Fish are people that make me so damn mad my teeth hurt because it's so painfully obvious their entire lives are devoted to getting negative attention and people won't stop giving it to them so they will just go away and be miserable by themselves.

 

[Cure Quanta]

I think it's pretty simple. At heart it seems like he isn't so much in love with the idea of creating a game so much as he's infatuated with the idea of being popular for making a video game, especially if he doesn't have to share it with anybody. How he gets there and what kind of game he creates appears to be inconsequential at that point, just as long as he can somehow convince people it's the best thing since bread period and he's put in the pantheon of important gaming people.

It's different when your intent is to make a game as opposed to making yourself famous making a game. I can't even say I see some of myself in Bob Bob Bobbin' Along due to having a game concept simmering since I don't know jackshit about game development either, but had the presence of mind to actually start reading about how to make a game and look for the tools I need.

 

[ChurchOfGodBear]

Another point... If you enjoy a video game, and think it's fantastic, do you really give a shit how many people worked on it? Is a game less fun if it's made by five people, or 15, or 50? I don't think many gamers would really factor that into their thinking at all.

... So how long until Bobbo does a vanity search on himself and drops in on this thread?

 

[Cure Quanta]

I actually wouldn't hold my breath. With his Kotaku publicity and his Kickstarter funds and comments, his is a crazy train that doesn't need to stop at the CWCki station.