The hard truth (heh), at least for some of the sad little homophobes here on The Farms, is that straight men are mostly useless fucking tools at the best of times, and actively undermine civilization at their worst. White, black, red, doesn't really matter. Most straight dudes I know don't even know how to change their own fucking oil. Half of you reading that sentence don't even know what it means. When I told a dude who reports to me that I had to replaces my hot water heater over a weekend, he acted like I was referring to some arcane ritual of which he had not even the capacity to fully comprehend, much less ever consider attempting himself. This motherfucker served in the goddamn armed forces.
I'm gay as fuck, and a whole lot of you straight boys could learn a thing or three about self-sufficiency - much less how to turn a screw or swing a hammer - so yeah, I'm gonna go with modern "men" need all the help they can get. The source of that help hardly matters - beggars, after all, can't be choosers.
Self sufficiency and self reliance have been completely undermined and even demonized in some respects. Those two values don’t generate enough money for others to be valued.
Either way, I think it’s a bit odd to look to any one person to learn “how to be a man” or “how to a woman.”
Most of the shit is very obvious. Take care of your health, develop a system of ethics and stick to it, improve your grit, be useful by learning new skills, take reasonable risks, and be reasonably brave when the need arises. Men have the additional requirement to be strong enough for defense and hunting, as usually the use for males historically. Women have the additional requirement of child rearing & fostering a healthy, productive home for children.
Though defense & hunting have been reduced largely while child rearing hasnt, it doesn’t mean that strength/bravery is no longer an important trait. It is very undervalued but still of great importance.Women and children need men to be strong, reliable, useful, and possess a good grasp on morality. Otherwise your home will be sick or country will be enslaved.
These things take a lot time - and should be drawing from a lot of different people to learn “how to be a man.” Philosophers, history, your handy neighbor, your dad, leaders, coworkers… regardless if they’re perfect men all the time or even gay is moot. They typically have one thing they can teach you to improve yourself either way. Although, you probably won’t learn much from a limp wristed straight guy who lives online and doesn’t know the difference between dish detergent and dish soap.
Notice none of these things involve sex explicitly. Masculinity shouldn’t and doesn’t hinge on fucking women or fucking lots of women. If a man is trying to sell you a book on masculinity and drones about the importance of fucking women, he’s probably not someone who’s advice is particularly beneficial.
But, as a not man myself, I don’t fucking know. I get all my expectations of men from Hallmark Christmas special movies.
