Speedrunning Thread (Take 2) - GOTTA GO FAST

[ES 195]

At this point I'll watch a speedrun of anything if the runner has a normal fucking voice

It's why ZFG is the only speedrunner I watch. His voice is a bit monotone but he doesn't spergout for anything. He might be doing a Ocarina of Time 100% No Source Requirement at the upcoming GDQ.

 

[L'Homme de la Lune]

At this point I'll watch a speedrun of anything if the runner has a normal fucking voice

BotW? I loved Breath of the Wild! Let's just see how he doe-nope, not listening to that voice for an hour.

Has a genuine woman ever done a speedrun at GDQ?

Yes, but I don't recall any of them being actually good at the game they ran.

 

[Rip_In_Pepperino]

Has a genuine woman ever done a speedrun at GDQ?

In the interest of spergery, I will list all of whom I am aware (excluding the upcoming AGDQ 2020, which has a list of main and bonus games, because we don't know which will end up getting run and which backups will end up getting used. and presuming that by "genuine" you mean cisgender):

• GDQx 2019
  • Edobean - Tetris Attack, V-Hard one-handed
    • had WR until shortly before the event, now in 2nd place
  • Beckski93 - Tomb Raider: Anniversary, No Bug Jump
    • 8th place out of 20, 4:16 behind 24:26 WR
• SGDQ 2019 (none)
• AGDQ 2019 (none)
• GDQx 2018
  • Escheria - Environmental Station α, Inbounds
    • was in 3rd place at the time and still is; having bopped the former top-2 holders while being bopped by two newer runners
• SGDQ 2018
  • AeonFrodo - Mario Kart 8 Deluxe, 200cc 32 tracks with items
    • was in 4th place at the time and is now in 5th out of 81, with the same PB
  • Beckski93 - Tomb Raider (1996), PC
    • 5th place out of 18 now, would be 10th today if she did not improve her 1:08:02 PB from the time by 4:38, not bothering to figure out what place she would have had at the time
• AGDQ 2018
  • Sayvi - Dark Souls III, No TearDrop
    • 27th place out of 85 now, same PB as at the time
• HRDQ 2017 (none)
• SGDQ 2017
  • flying_fox - Sonic CD (2011), Tails
    • had WR at the time and still does, with the same PB
• AGDQ 2017 (none)
• SGDQ 2016
  • YellowKillerBee - QuackShot Starring Donald Duck
    • 7th place out of 27 now, same PB as at the time
• AGDQ 2016
  • AeonFrodo - Mario Kart 8, 200cc 32 tracks with items
    • 4th place out of 192 now, with a PB she got a month after the event, which was 2nd place when she got it
• SGDQ 2015
  • EssentiaFour- Chrono Trigger, 100% Co-Op
    • with puwexil, who has 4th place out of 14, while EssentiaFour has 7th place, both with the individual PBs that they had at the time
  • Skybilz - The Oregon Trail (1971)
    • no records on speedrun.com for this version and no recorded PB for any other version (closest thing is the 1990 MS-DOS version, split between Farmer and Banker), went almost triple the estimate, but it was the end of the Silly block anyway
  • EssentiaFour - Half-Minute Hero, Hero 30
    • no recorded PB
  • misskaddykins - Octodad: Dadliest Catch, Co-Op
    • with then-BF Geoff, they had WR at the time and are now at 2nd place with the same PB, and she now has solo PC WR
  • YellowKillerBee - Mickey Mania, SNES
    • 4th place out of 8 now
• AGDQ 2015 (none)
• SGDQ 2014
  • EssentiaFour - Final Fantasy VI, 100% Co-Op
    • with puwexil, no leaderboards on speedrun dot com, but they had the only two runs for Japanese Any% at the time, with puwexil a couple minutes ahead of her in a nearly 5-hour run; now there is one other runner, who has WR, and much more recently, she got 3rd place out of 29 for Any% NoSketch
  • Bananas - The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Seasons, All Essences (I believe this was Any% at the time)
    • 25th place out of 52 now, was in 4th place when she got her current PB shortly after the event
• AGDQ 2014 (none)
• SGDQ 2013 (none)
• AGDQ 2013 (none)
• SGDQ 2012(all EssentiaFour all the time from here on back)
  • EssentiaFour - Final Fantasy VI, 100%
    • no recorded PB in any leaderboard category from the time
  • EssentiaFour - Donkey Kong Country 2
    • mentioned a sub-hour PB on SpeedDemosArchive back in 2007, fastest claimed time back then, but no recorded PB on current leaderboards
• AGDQ 2012 (none)
• JRDQ 2011 (Horaro shows one run, by a man)
• AGDQ 2011(all usernames below are current Twitch usernames even though Twitch did not exist yet, and I think that the marathons used UStream rather than Twitch predecessor JustinTV Gaming)
  • EssentiaFour - Chrono Trigger, 100%
    • leaderboards do not have records that far back
  • EssentiaFour - Lego Star Wars II: The Original Trilogy, Co-Op
    • with Denton, and although Horaro doesn't say which platform, only the PC leaderboards have Co-Op, and neither runner has any recorded PBs in any category for any of the platforms
  • EssentiaFour - Donkey Kong Country 2
    • presumably 100%, considering how long the run took and her claimed sub-hour Any% PB
• CGDQ 2010(look at all those powerwords, 'twas a simpler time, also there might be runs on SDA but cba to check rn)
  • EssentiaFour - Final Fantasy VI
  • EssentiaFour - Dr. Mario
  • EssentiaFour - Donkey Kong Country 2
    • presumably 100%

This list is in reverse chronological order and may be incomplete; I did check on some usernames that appeared feminine, but I may have missed some; in particular, if I didn't already know that Edobean is a cis woman (she frequently announces at GDQs and is often asked to shout "POYO" in a Kirby-like voice), I would have suspected someone with that username to be a cis man and would not have investigated further. I also only knew that Sayvi is female because she was mentioned earlier ITT.

There's a very good chance that I missed the username of some cis woman from before SGDQ 2014, because the only username that I knew or suspected belonged to a cis woman was EssentiaFour.

(I also thought that tinahacks was cis, but according to at least one list in a random archived 4chan thread, she's trans; FWIW she ran in three GDQ events, one in each of 2017, 2018, and 2019; also TIL that Geoff, formerly known as Carbonstealer, is now known as Kitt and is transitioning.)

---
Watch this space, while I go ahead and fill in more links to VODs and Twitch pages.

 

[Sinner's Sandwich]

Cis is a load of troonshit

 

[No Exit]

In the interest of spergery, I will list all of whom I am aware (excluding the upcoming AGDQ 2020, which has a list of main and bonus games, because we don't know which will end up getting run and which backups will end up getting used. and presuming that by "genuine" you mean cisgender):

The kind of female runners with vaginas who don't received "Dial 8" donation messages. By genuine, he meant real women not trannies/autogynephiliacs.

 

[Boss Bass]

I was just thinking about how nice it was having a religious mother of five at GDQs. I wish they still cared about diversity.

 

[Pissmaster]

and presuming that by "genuine" you mean cisgender):

I don't say "cisgender" because I don't respect communities of screeching violent narcissists that try to ruin other's lives when their delusional fantasies aren't catered to by absolutely everyone. Yes, I mean women that were born as what those outside the anglosphere would unquestionably consider women, not the monstrosities that a subset of white collar, overwhelmingly white attention whore beggars call themselves as an excuse to play the pathetic victim angle.

Thanks for the list though, but you should use your Adderall on something else

 

[Stab You in the Back]

I've heard people claim that SmoothOperative is a genuine female, but it has such a weird fucking moon face that I'm withholding judgment until I see confirmation.

 

[RadicalCentrist]

I was just thinking about how nice it was having a religious mother of five at GDQs. I wish they still cared about diversity.

I thought this was a joke until I googled that autistic list earlier. Good golly! Also they celebrated their 15th year anniversary recently. No wonder she's verboten from GDQ, there's far too much sanity and maturity there.

Yeah, that's a keeper my dudes.

 

[I can't imagine]

In the interest of spergery, I will list all of whom I am aware (excluding the upcoming AGDQ 2020, which has a list of main and bonus games, because we don't know which will end up getting run and which backups will end up getting used. and presuming that by "genuine" you mean cisgender):

• Amyrlinn - Borderlands 2, All Quests Co-Op
  • with TheFuncannon and Shockwve, the trio had WR at the time and still has it, with the same PB

I'll admit the name makes it confusing, but Amyrlinn is a guy. Like, I don't even think they're trans, their handle is just Amy for some reason.

Edit: Imaginary Inkorporated ran NiGHTS at GDQx, and at least seemed to be biologically female.

 

[Intelligent Calcium]

I was just thinking about how nice it was having a religious mother of five at GDQs. I wish they still cared about diversity.

While she's not as involved as she used to be, she's a pillar of the RPG speedrunning community. The first few RPG Limit Break marathons were held at here house, and I think it's still pretty common for naming incentives in RPG runs for female characters to default to Essentia.

 

[Mikoyan]

So, a year ago, Trihex called one of his friends a faggot on stream. That apparently caused a kerfluffle I didn't know about, but it's smoothed over now.

Except now it's not. GDQ has apparently decided to go back a year and give him a temp-ban that expires after AGDQ, so he won't be on the Mario Maker 2 race or whatever he was going to run. He apparently was key in getting the block added (that makes sense), so it's doubly ironic. Expect salt and GDQ-pocracy galore.

 

[Intelligent Calcium]

I hope they replace him with a tranny for maximum transparency.

 

[No Exit]

I hope they replace him with a tranny for maximum transparency.

Considering there's almost more troons speedrunning than normal people at this point it's likely they will.

 

[Whetfahrt Cheesebörger]

I hope they replace him with a tranny for maximum transparency.

For tl;dw:

• For those not in the know, in 2018, Trihex and a few of his friends played the (then) newly-released Mario Party on Switch while drinking. He told his friends that they "played like fags" which caught him a suspension on Twitch. Here's a Kuntaku article (archive) on the whole thing. He apologized like the good woke boy he is and still got banned from AGDQ2019, SGDQ2019, and GDQx2019 which happens at TwitchCon, none of which he knew about.
• Trihex found out on Saturday that he was "retroactively" banned from AGDQ2020. Didn't say anything because he "didn't want to jeopardize the other runners."
• GDQ graciously allowed them to replace Trihex with PangeaPanga (shockingly, not a troon) which is why he's giving his thoughts on the ban now.
• Most of the video is him self-flagellating as part of the woke brigade amid much of chat telling him the ban is bullshit and so is GDQ.

Trihex has been a lost cause for some time now. GDQ has consistently shit on him despite his influence in the speedrunning - and, more recently, the Super Mario Maker 2 - community. Yet he continues to defend them in hopes that they'll allow him to go there. Frankly, he needs to man up and understand that the reason people get pissed off at GDQ is because of bullshit bans like the one he's landed.

 

[Mikoyan]

For tl;dw:

• For those not in the know, in 2018, Trihex and a few of his friends played the (then) newly-released Mario Party on Switch while drinking. He told his friends that they "played like fags" which caught him a suspension on Twitch. Here's a Kuntaku article (archive) on the whole thing. He apologized like the good woke boy he is and still got banned from AGDQ2019, SGDQ2019, and GDQx2019 which happens at TwitchCon, none of which he knew about.
• Trihex found out on Saturday that he was "retroactively" banned from AGDQ2020. Didn't say anything because he "didn't want to jeopardize the other runners."
• GDQ graciously allowed them to replace Trihex with PangeaPanga (shockingly, not a troon) which is why he's giving his thoughts on the ban now.
• Most of the video is him self-flagellating as part of the woke brigade amid much of chat telling him the ban is bullshit and so is GDQ.

Trihex has been a lost cause for some time now. GDQ has consistently shit on him despite his influence in the speedrunning - and, more recently, the Super Mario Maker 2 - community. Yet he continues to defend them in hopes that they'll allow him to go there. Frankly, he needs to man up and understand that the reason people get pissed off at GDQ is because of bullshit bans like the one he's landed.

Given his previously pretty based status for doing things like 'you can't ban me I'm hosting the GDQ poverty stream', you'd think he would.

On the other hand, his other recent drama was getting a brief twitch ban for streaming the Dem debates to promote Team Bernie.

 

[whatever I feel like]

Trihex used to be cool, now he's fat and whenever I see his stream its either "Just Chatting" or worse, supposed to be Mario but actually him just chatting. Fuck that noise, he hasn't been a competitive runner in three or more years.

edit: Also, pangeapanga is one of the greatest Mario runners of the modern age. He's good on the couch too, though having Trihex would have been a bit nostalgic for when he actually fucking ran games.

 

[FrozenFlame]

I didn't see this posted here yet, if it was forgive me.

But this year at AGDQ, the badges are going to have pronouns on them.

I wish I was making this up.

 

[MysticMisty]

I didn't see this posted here yet, if it was forgive me.

But this year at AGDQ, the badges are going to have pronouns on them.

I wish I was making this up.

Those badges are going to have to be massive to fit all those names and pronouns these snowflakes love.

 

[ono]

I didn't see this posted here yet, if it was forgive me.

But this year at AGDQ, the badges are going to have pronouns on them.

I wish I was making this up.

I knew this was inevitable after they started putting up pronouns for the announcers on certain GDQ hotfix streams. I can't recall now what game it was but there were two commentators, both sounded like cis women, that had she/her pronouns next to their handles. I believe I may have screenshotted it, if I find those screenshots I'll update this.

It just seems kind of egotistical to do it for commentators, people are supposed to be paying attention to the run. The chat also tends to speak to/about commentators directly, not in third person. Badge pronouns are also dumb, and not everyone wears them right where people can see them anyway.

You just know next year it'll be the Bronycon stoplight colors for autistic people that can't understand social cues.



Edit: This isn't the first stream I saw but everyone has pronouns listed on this run holy fuck