STRUGGLES BEING ME | PART 1

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While her being excited about going to a gym gives me a slight spark of hope,
Remember, kids: Amber lies.
She isn't the type who'd get excited about going to the gym.


here's a short interesting passage that confirms that theory: In obese children, a region of the brain in charge of controlling impulsivity, called the orbitofrontal cortex, appears to be shrunken compared with that of lean children, ..., the smaller this brain region was, the more likely the adolescents were to eat impulsively, the researchers said.

Scientists can't experiment on humans placed in an optimal environment, so the results tend to be skewed. Were the test subjects more impulsive because excess fat prevents that area of the brain from developing normally, or because the parents indulged the kids, leading to the area's underdevelopment?

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Semi-related side thought: is online grocery delivery a thing in the US?

I suspect her town is too small for that. It's a huge country and sometimes the next town over is an hour drive (it isn't the case here, just an example).

The other day I heard that Walmart is starting to do delivery, but I think it's for bigger cities - for now.
Doesn't Amazon have a grocery delivery thing too? But again, I think it's still very limited.
 
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The other day I heard that Walmart is starting to do delivery, but I think it's for bigger cities - for now.
Doesn't Amazon have a grocery delivery thing too? But again, I think it's still very limited.

I had forgotten about Amazon, but I bet she can get chocolate/sweets through there as binge food without any effort at all. Makes sense about the distance though. I googled 'grocery delivery Kentucky' and some options were coming up, including in Lexington. I wonder if AL and Becky did make the move if they'd just give up and move there rather than doing the 2 hour pilgrimage. Becky gets to stay in state and AL gets to be closer to the Cheesecake Factory and shopping.
 
I call bullshit on slip disc. :powerlevel: but currently I'm on 2nd week of 3 week recovery for slip disc after accident and I've had to confirm it after mri. No way this bitch fit in any mri and I'm sure she is just pulling things out of her ginormous ass just to get that YouTube buck

I'm sorry but I'm going to chuck her slip disc diagnosis in "things amber says without proof" box unless I see any actual fucking doctor's note. One of the things for getting relief from slip disk is losing weight. Wonder what amber doctor said to her (if he indeed exists irl)
To be fair, she was told that by a chiropractor and half of them (maybe more) are quacks trying to get repeat business.
 
I bet she can get chocolate/sweets through there
Yep, she could get a lot of edible stuff from Amazon, but her taste and budget prevents her from doing so.
Lexington. I wonder if AL and Becky did make the move if they'd just give up and move there rather than doing the 2 hour pilgrimage.
From what both Becky and Amber have said so far, I get the impression that Becky is afraid* of the big city. She's a small town gorl and doesn't want to change.

*Some time ago Becky said that if she moved to Lexington, she would get a concealed carry license. Then, a few days ago there is a video where Amber and Becky are in traffic and Becky mentioned how much she hated driving there (I think it was on the Cheesecake Factory video).
 
@Long time lurker
The studies don't show a specific cause/effect link between obesity and the size of the orbitofrontal cortex, but it does show a direct association. It more points out that some people, for some reason, are born with this area of the brain already smaller than normal. And that these same people suspiciously seem to be predisposed to overeating. So these folks are predisposed already to addictive qualities most likely inherited by their relatives. Amber's parents had addiction problems if I am not mistaking? Here's the small article.

The TLDR to all of that is: Your question is the golden egg here. Is it obesity that leads to a smaller frontal lobe, or the small frontal lobe leading to obesity? My personal theory is that of the latter. Amber's brain wiring is predisposed to addiction, most likely inherited. If she liked alcohol, she'd be an alcoholic. If she liked drugs, she'd be a drug addict. Her dopamine fix just happens to be tickled by food.
 
@Long time lurker
The studies don't show a specific cause/effect link between obesity and the size of the orbitofrontal cortex, but it does show a direct association. It more points out that some people, for some reason, are born with this area of the brain already smaller than normal. And that these same people suspiciously seem to be predisposed to overeating. So these folks are predisposed already to addictive qualities most likely inherited by their relatives. Amber's parents had addiction problems if I am not mistaking? Here's the small article.

The TLDR to all of that is: Your question is the golden egg here. Is it obesity that leads to a smaller frontal lobe, or the small frontal lobe leading to obesity? My personal theory is that of the latter. Amber's brain wiring is predisposed to addiction, most likely inherited. If she liked alcohol, she'd be an alcoholic. If she liked drugs, she'd be a drug addict. Her dopamine fix just happens to be tickled by food.

Biology is fascinating, but it isn't one size fits all. The real answer could be all of what you mention plus a few other aspects no one has thought about yet. Although I'm struggling to think of anyone I know IRL who's over weight and doesn't have issues with impulsiveness.

Amber does have addictive traits, but I tend to see what she does more as a self-harm thing than an addiction. She has mentioned several times that she likes to feel full (but in truth she means overstuffed), which is something most people don't like.

I know very little about addictions, but it's my understanding that an addict will seek the dopamine "overload" (for lack of a better word). I suspect that anything that can cause that will be used. Most addicts probably remain in their "lanes" because they know whatever they favor will give them the rush they seek, whereas using something new might not, and that would be wasted money that could have gone into their drug of choice.

BTW, Amber used to drink, and as with food, she went overboard with it. Nothing that woman does is in moderation.
 
is online grocery delivery a thing in the US? It's popular with supermarkets in my home country, even in rural regions, and would suit Amber down to the ground as she wouldn't have to make the effort to go get food, it would come to her. I'm guessing maybe no as we haven't already seen her take advantage of it, but if they do end up getting their own place, I'd be interested if it was somewhere that could be a service. It would certainly kick bed-bound state out of high gear and into hyperdrive.

I think it's a thing in the more urban areas, but she live in Buttfuck Kentucky. Even if it is a possibility, I don't see her using it until she literally has no other choice. Right now, going to Walmart and the grocery store are the biggest 'outings' in her life. She is like an elderly lady, but without the doctors visits or church.

I know this chick who is going to have weight loss surgery, and she uses online ordering from a grocery store. Thing is, she is using it so she stays on track and isn't tempted to buy junk. She still looks fat as fuck to me, but apparently she's lost and maintained enough and for long enough that the ebbl socialized New European Order gubberment is going to pay for her surgery... but I think Hamber would just use online ordering as a way to bring in junk when her enablers refuse to buy her fix food.
 
She said at 410lbs she was able to ride a roller coaster..does anyone know when that was? It must of been quite awhile ago because she hasn't done anything interesting lately. At the beginning of the year she was 497 and then got to 470 (thanks to being sick)... now she is probably 515-530 (guessing she gained weight since videos are behind). It seems for New Years she was all in for losing but has been gaining more rapidly than ever before. Like the harder she tries to lose the more she gained. Maybe that lexapro is making her gain weight faster.
 
Lots of insane drug rambling that I really hope is trolling but probably isn't.
Let's put this to rest once and for all: Any drug that increases Amber's heart rate is a very bad idea. You give her ketamine and her heart will give out, probably within minutes of ingesting the drug. Thin and otherwise fit people have had heart attacks using ketamine, suffering permanent heart damage if they survived. She would experience more brain alteration from the oxygen deprivation caused by a failing heart than she would via chemical interactions and k-hole contemplation. No sane person (hahaha, OP is completely unhinged, but my point still stands) would recommend a drug that accelerates heart rate for a 500+ pound woman who already has difficulty oxygenating because she's so fucking sick from obesity. I know she seems like a good candidate for a Hail Mary situation wherein caution is thrown to the wind in the hopes of a paradigm change before Becky has to finance a piano case coffin to bury her but her system would shut down before she had a chance to experience any sort of epiphany.

Look, I'm a big fan of the idea the psychopharmacology can be the key to advanced sapience and self-knowledge. But filling Amber with animal tranqs is not gonna open her third eye or provide enlightenment. In her current state such a path will literally and directly result in her shitting her pants right before the fire department manages to cut her out and get her to the ER.

I wish I wouldn't have but I thought about her underarms. They never get air, they are constantly rubbing. There is probably dark dying skin under there. Never completely dry. Really stinky with yeast or whatever grows in dark, moist places.
Wanna know what's in Amberlynn's armpits?
Skin tags. Lots and lots of skin tags.
armpit-skin-tags.jpg

Just a guess though. But I think we can all agree something eldritch is growing in those pits.
 
Scientists can't experiment on humans placed in an optimal environment, so the results tend to be skewed.

She's not human.

Sorted.

Bring out the test-tubes, bunsen burners and whizzifier thing. She's griping about rides not being made for elephants, so the centrifuge would grant that wish too. Granted, she'd be in bits....but that's no deal-breaker.
 
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She said at 410lbs she was able to ride a roller coaster..does anyone know when that was?
I wasn't paying much attention, but she mentioned Disneyland, so it would had happened before she turned 18.

Many Farmers mentioned that she and Destiny went to an amusement park and Destiny went alone for the rides, while Amber waited for her.
She's not human.
I wasn't thinking about Amber when I made that post. I don't think she'd be a good subject for any serious research.
 
I wasn't paying much attention, but she mentioned Disneyland, so it would had happened before she turned 18.

Many Farmers mentioned that she and Destiny went to an amusement park and Destiny went alone for the rides, while Amber waited for her.

I wasn't thinking about Amber when I made that post. I don't think she'd be a good subject for any serious research.
She went with Destiny to some sort of low rent fair and she watched Destiny ride kiddie rides. she also went to Busch Gardens or something like that with Krystle and fam, and she sat out all the rides but had super fun time anyway. I think she claims her parents took her to Disneyland.
 
My honours project in psychology is about the effects of sugar consumption on self-control. Past research (in rats) suggests that sugar consumptions worsens self control (rather than bad self control leading to sugar consumption). My experiment is whether binge eating sugar in particular has a negative effect on self control. Soon we will see.
 
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