Surtur and littlebiscuits guide to F.A.T.A.L

Why did I click this thread? Why did I read the whole damn thing? You know what? Fuck it. Bring on the nukes. This planet doesn't deserve to exist anymore.
Before bringing on the nukes, would you like to roll for any circumferences?
 
Okay, well-rested after a night of doing quadratic equations and averaging out subabilities in my sleep. But after the things I've seen, dreaming about making endless die rolls and pointless math equations was probably the best-case scenario for me. But it's okay, FATAL is a good thing. It has redeeming qualities. I can't have spent this many hours rolling up my kobold for anything this bad, can I? No. FATAL is a good thing, a misunderstood thing, and soon I'll reach the end of this dark, gruelling ordeal, and I'll be able to roleplay my little kobold adventuress making traps and enslaving humans, and all will be well in the world.

CHAPTER SIX ; SOCIALITY

Name ; Amsia

You lied to me FATAL. You said I could choose my own name, the only thing I ever had a choice over, and then six chapters in you took that away from me. You took it away so cruelly, without fanfare, without ceremony. Just 'to determine the character's name, consult Appendix 7'. And with that, I am no longer Byron Hall the Kobold. I am now Amsia the Kobold. I have always been Amsia the Kobold.

Birthday ; 2/ 15 / 5085 (M/D/Y)

I was born on the second month of the year, but won't tell me the name of the month I was born in unless I consult another rulebook. There is another rulebook. The corebook gives me rules on anal tearing, bubonic plague and armors of jewy jewbacca, yet I need to consult another rulebook to learn the names of the months. No, this is good. This is good and right. I will read this additional rulebook. I must read it. I am hunting down this new rulebook. I will venture to the dark side of the internet. I will fight my way past cyrillic advertisements for dick pills and closing my heart to the seductive entreaties of Vietnamese mail order brides. I am closing my eyes to the many hundreds of entreaties, pleading at me, begging me to find out why my computer is running so slowly. Illusions of detected viruses and competitions that I've already won dance before me, but I am ignoring them... I am... I am learning Polish. I have learned to read Polish to obtain this elusive rulebook. I push the button marked "Pobierz". I have it. I have the precious thing. My computer fan is now grinding in protest and dickgirl pop-ups now haunt me relentlessly, but I have it.

The second month of the Kobold calender is... "the months do not have names". FATAL... oh FATAL, how you mistreat me. But it's okay, I still love you. I know I am wretched and lowly, and I must have done something very bad, something very wrong. I know you'd only do this to me because I deserve it.


Birth Status ; Legitimate
Social Class ; Slave
Starting Funds ; Clothes on Back
Education ; Illiterate
Birthplace ; Kobold Hamlet

I came so close, so close to emancipation, but alas, the die failed me. Amsia the Kobold will begin the game as a slave in a quaint hamlet of her own kind, owning only the clothes on her back. This is fine. Perhaps, with her dexterity, she is a skilled pursemaker or delousing slave? We shall watch the rise of Amsia the Kobold as she casts off the shackles of her bondage and with fire and sword brands her name into the annals of history, The Slave That Rose to Glory.

Siblings ; 6 Sisters, No Brothers
Birth Rank ; 7 (Youngest Child)

My sweet sisters, shall I roll you? Shall I roll you all? Shall I endure this ordeal, six more times, to fully know my place as Amsia the Kobold, Amsia the Slave, Amsia the Many-Sistered? I think I shall. I think I must. It is not right that I know my vaginal circumference and aereola hue, but not the names of my sweet sisters. I shall roll you. I shall roll you all.

Languages ; Kobold, Sapian

Choice! Oh, FATAL is giving me choice. The lingual abilities I rolled earlier give me the ability to know two languages. I select Kobold, my mothertongue and the voice of my peoples, and then consider my other options. Buggeric is a pidgen dialect of Kobold, understandable by koboldkind and bugbears alike. As a dialect, it would be conceivable that I know it. On the other hand, humans are the favoured slaves of koboldkind, and perhaps I may have picked up a smattering of their tongue as I worked alongside them in chains? FATAL has given me choice, at long last, but now I can only wonder which choice will be most pleasing to FATAL. In the end, I select Sapian. I can only hope the FATAL approves. All this freedom to think is a harsh and unremembered reality to me. I do not like it. I want to be held, unthinking, comforted in the inescapable embrace of random chance. Please, FATAL, please don't do that to me again.

Sexuality ; Heterosexual
Debauchery ; 172

I rolled a 92 on Debauchery. Adding my +10 Kobold modifier and my +70 Sexual Sadism modifier from earlier, I am now in the top 172 percentile of debauched, perverted deviants. I am willing to entertain multiple partners, to eat defecation, to do literally anything to sate my perverted lusts. Clearly my reluctance to exercise free choice has pleased the gods of FATAL, and they have blessed me with a boon. Can there be any clearer sign that the gods of FATAL are pleased with my prostrations, for they have now blessed me with a sign of their favour. I am the chosen one, the slaveborn Kobold sadist, come to rape and pillage this land with perversion 72% more perverted than is even technically possible. In a game where rape is the highest form of art, where autism reigns supreme, where free determination is forsaken and despised, I am now the Truest PC. I thank you for this blessing, Gods of FATAL. I shall never disappoint you again.

This chapter is done. Coming up next, I will finally discover whether I'm a pursemaker or a delouser.

Total Die Rolls ; 244
 
Okay, well-rested after a night of doing quadratic equations and averaging out subabilities in my sleep. But after the things I've seen, dreaming about making endless die rolls and pointless math equations was probably the best-case scenario for me. But it's okay, FATAL is a good thing. It has redeeming qualities. I can't have spent this many hours rolling up my kobold for anything this bad, can I? No. FATAL is a good thing, a misunderstood thing, and soon I'll reach the end of this dark, gruelling ordeal, and I'll be able to roleplay my little kobold adventuress making traps and enslaving humans, and all will be well in the world.

CHAPTER SIX ; SOCIALITY

Name ; Amsia

You lied to me FATAL. You said I could choose my own name, the only thing I ever had a choice over, and then six chapters in you took that away from me. You took it away so cruelly, without fanfare, without ceremony. Just 'to determine the character's name, consult Appendix 7'. And with that, I am no longer Byron Hall the Kobold. I am now Amsia the Kobold. I have always been Amsia the Kobold.

Birthday ; 2/ 15 / 5085 (M/D/Y)

I was born on the second month of the year, but won't tell me the name of the month I was born in unless I consult another rulebook. There is another rulebook. The corebook gives me rules on anal tearing, bubonic plague and armors of jewy jewbacca, yet I need to consult another rulebook to learn the names of the months. No, this is good. This is good and right. I will read this additional rulebook. I must read it. I am hunting down this new rulebook. I will venture to the dark side of the internet. I will fight my way past cyrillic advertisements for dick pills and closing my heart to the seductive entreaties of Vietnamese mail order brides. I am closing my eyes to the many hundreds of entreaties, pleading at me, begging me to find out why my computer is running so slowly. Illusions of detected viruses and competitions that I've already won dance before me, but I am ignoring them... I am... I am learning Polish. I have learned to read Polish to obtain this elusive rulebook. I push the button marked "Pobierz". I have it. I have the precious thing. My computer fan is now grinding in protest and dickgirl pop-ups now haunt me relentlessly, but I have it.

The second month of the Kobold calender is... "the months do not have names". FATAL... oh FATAL, how you mistreat me. But it's okay, I still love you. I know I am wretched and lowly, and I must have done something very bad, something very wrong. I know you'd only do this to me because I deserve it.


Birth Status ; Legitimate
Social Class ; Slave
Starting Funds ; Clothes on Back
Education ; Illiterate
Birthplace ; Kobold Hamlet

I came so close, so close to emancipation, but alas, the die failed me. Amsia the Kobold will begin the game as a slave in a quaint hamlet of her own kind, owning only the clothes on her back. This is fine. Perhaps, with her dexterity, she is a skilled pursemaker or delousing slave? We shall watch the rise of Amsia the Kobold as she casts off the shackles of her bondage and with fire and sword brands her name into the annals of history, The Slave That Rose to Glory.

Siblings ; 6 Sisters, No Brothers
Birth Rank ; 7 (Youngest Child)

My sweet sisters, shall I roll you? Shall I roll you all? Shall I endure this ordeal, six more times, to fully know my place as Amsia the Kobold, Amsia the Slave, Amsia the Many-Sistered? I think I shall. I think I must. It is not right that I know my vaginal circumference and aereola hue, but not the names of my sweet sisters. I shall roll you. I shall roll you all.

Languages ; Kobold, Sapian

Choice! Oh, FATAL is giving me choice. The lingual abilities I rolled earlier give me the ability to know two languages. I select Kobold, my mothertongue and the voice of my peoples, and then consider my other options. Buggeric is a pidgen dialect of Kobold, understandable by koboldkind and bugbears alike. As a dialect, it would be conceivable that I know it. On the other hand, humans are the favoured slaves of koboldkind, and perhaps I may have picked up a smattering of their tongue as I worked alongside them in chains? FATAL has given me choice, at long last, but now I can only wonder which choice will be most pleasing to FATAL. In the end, I select Sapian. I can only hope the FATAL approves. All this freedom to think is a harsh and unremembered reality to me. I do not like it. I want to be held, unthinking, comforted in the inescapable embrace of random chance. Please, FATAL, please don't do that to me again.

Sexuality ; Heterosexual
Debauchery ; 172

I rolled a 92 on Debauchery. Adding my +10 Kobold modifier and my +70 Sexual Sadism modifier from earlier, I am now in the top 172 percentile of debauched, perverted deviants. I am willing to entertain multiple partners, to eat defecation, to do literally anything to sate my perverted lusts. Clearly my reluctance to exercise free choice has pleased the gods of FATAL, and they have blessed me with a boon. Can there be any clearer sign that the gods of FATAL are pleased with my prostrations, for they have now blessed me with a sign of their favour. I am the chosen one, the slaveborn Kobold sadist, come to rape and pillage this land with perversion 72% more perverted than is even technically possible. In a game where rape is the highest form of art, where autism reigns supreme, where free determination is forsaken and despised, I am now the Truest PC. I thank you for this blessing, Gods of FATAL. I shall never disappoint you again.

This chapter is done. Coming up next, I will finally discover whether I'm a pursemaker or a delouser.

Total Die Rolls ; 244
Interesting the only choice isn't your name but your language. I don't know if you will ever get to live out Byron I mean Amsia slave rape fantasies she will be the only complete character in the history of FATAL.
 
Before bringing on the nukes, would you like to roll for any circumferences?
NO! NO, I WOULD NOT! All of my orifices are virgin and pure and they will remain so, thank you very much!
 
NO! NO, I WOULD NOT! All of my orifices are virgin and pure and they will remain so, thank you very much!
I mean't the circumference of a gun, in case you would want to make sure anyone tries to stop the nukes from coming, especially if they were fans of FATAL.
 
You iconoclastic profaners better shut your high-circumference mouthcunts before I come over there and shut them for you. This is FATAL we're talking about. Where the dice never lie.

CHAPTER SEVEN ; OCCUPATION

Occupation ; Slave
Slave Duties ; Whore

This was to be expected. As my social class is slave, I move straight to the slave table to determine my duties. As a female, I had a 1 in 5 chance of being a whore, and I rolled deep into the whore-end of the table. I didn't even come close to rolling 'wench'. As a slave of kobold society, I should have a full-back scarification marking me as property. FATAL now seems to want me to roll for the social class and occupation of my master. Not only do I have six sisters to roll, but my owner as well. Since there's nothing else to occupy in my chapter seven, I might as well do it

Owner's Name ; Muriyani
Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Gender ; Female

I'm supposed to consult with the GM to determine the race of my owner, but considering we've already determined I live in kobold society, I just went with kobold. Now to roll her social class, and...

Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Occupation ; Slave (Cupbearer)

I rolled slave. Kobolds have a good 50% chance of rolling slave. The game tells me to 'disregard nonsense answers' when it comes to rolling profession, but the Justice subsection seems to infer that Kobold slaves are fined in currency for most criminal infractions, suggesting that kobolds pay their slaves a wage. This is a historically accurate arrangement in certain cultures, as the footnotes I'm never going to bother to read could tell me. I'm going to take this to mean that a slave in kobold society can own property, including slaves. I guess that makes me the whore slave of a cupbearing slave. Now I guess I'll roll my for my mistress's owner to find out whose cup she's bearing.

Owner's Owner's Name ; Yustiana
Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Gender ; Female
Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Dancer

Ffffffffffffffff, okay. I'm a prostitute slave of a cupbearing slave of a dancing-girl slave. Hey, it's your paltry minimum-wage money, girls. Spend it on whatever you like, I guess.

Owner's Owner's Owner's Name ; Duvinse
Owner's Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Owner's Gender ; Female
Owner's Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Chambermaid

This Russian Nesting Doll of slavery has to end somewhere, doesn't it? Just gonna keep on rollin' till somebody finally has a freeman owner.

Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Name ; Yoyok
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Gender ; Male
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Dockwalloper

Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Name ; Bidar
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Gender ; Male
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Linkboy

Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Name ; Yatun
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Gender ; Female
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Wench

Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Name ; Alimin
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Gender ; Male
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Peasant
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Farmer

Alright, there we are. One thing I'll point out is that in the world of FATAL, 'peasants' and 'serfs' are inverted. In real life, a serf is a type of slave bound to the land. They are the property of the owner of that land, and while they have civil rights that are generally better than most chattel slaves, they are still slaves. The landlord cannot sell them, unless he sells the land they're bound to. In FATAL, "peasants" take that role, while "serfs" are the free peasantry. Fortunately, FATAL isn't going to make me roll to find out Alimin's landlord's social class and discover that he's some kind of landowning slave.

So, once apon a time there was a peasant farmer named Alimin. For some reason, despite not owning a tavern, he decided to purchase himself a serving wench by the name of Yatun. Maybe he sent her to the tavern and garnished her wages, or whatever, fine. An asset-slave. Now, Yatun was afraid of the dark, and purchased herself a young boy called Bidar to carry a torch for her, presumably for when she walked home from the tavern late at night after a hard shift of wenching. Bidar, for reasons known only to himself, purchased a man called Yoyok, who unloads freight at the docks, for whatever reason, I don't even fucking know anymore. Yoyok doesn't like tidying up his own little slave dockworker quarters, so he purchased a chambermaid called Duvinse. In turn, Duvinse purchased a dancing girl to entertain her, named Yustiana. Yustiana, being a vain and conceited sort, bought a girl to act as her cupbearer, named Muriyani. And then Muriyani purchased me, Amsia, to eat out her pussy after a long day of cupbearing.

Randomly generating everything makes for a more realistic game.


Total Dies Rolled ; 304
 
You iconoclastic profaners better shut your high-circumference mouthcunts before I come over there and shut them for you. This is FATAL we're talking about. Where the dice never lie.

CHAPTER SEVEN ; OCCUPATION

Occupation ; Slave
Slave Duties ; Whore

This was to be expected. As my social class is slave, I move straight to the slave table to determine my duties. As a female, I had a 1 in 5 chance of being a whore, and I rolled deep into the whore-end of the table. I didn't even come close to rolling 'wench'. As a slave of kobold society, I should have a full-back scarification marking me as property. FATAL now seems to want me to roll for the social class and occupation of my master. Not only do I have six sisters to roll, but my owner as well. Since there's nothing else to occupy in my chapter seven, I might as well do it

Owner's Name ; Muriyani
Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Gender ; Female

I'm supposed to consult with the GM to determine the race of my owner, but considering we've already determined I live in kobold society, I just went with kobold. Now to roll her social class, and...

Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Occupation ; Slave (Cupbearer)

I rolled slave. Kobolds have a good 50% chance of rolling slave. The game tells me to 'disregard nonsense answers' when it comes to rolling profession, but the Justice subsection seems to infer that Kobold slaves are fined in currency for most criminal infractions, suggesting that kobolds pay their slaves a wage. This is a historically accurate arrangement in certain cultures, as the footnotes I'm never going to bother to read could tell me. I'm going to take this to mean that a slave in kobold society can own property, including slaves. I guess that makes me the whore slave of a cupbearing slave. Now I guess I'll roll my for my mistress's owner to find out whose cup she's bearing.

Owner's Owner's Name ; Yustiana
Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Gender ; Female
Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Dancer
Ffffffffffffffff, okay. I'm a prostitute slave of a cupbearing slave of a dancing-girl slave. Hey, it's your paltry minimum-wage money, girls. Spend it on whatever you like, I guess.

Owner's Owner's Owner's Name ; Duvinse
Owner's Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Owner's Gender ; Female
Owner's Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Chambermaid
This Russian Nesting Doll of slavery has to end somewhere, doesn't it? Just gonna keep on rollin' till somebody finally has a freeman owner.

Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Name ; Yoyok
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Gender ; Male
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Dockwalloper

Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Name ; Bidar
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Gender ; Male
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Linkboy

Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Name ; Yatun
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Gender ; Female
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Wench

Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Name ; Alimin
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Gender ; Male
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Peasant
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Farmer
Alright, there we are. One thing I'll point out is that in the world of FATAL, 'peasants' and 'serfs' are inverted. In real life, a serf is a type of slave bound to the land. They are the property of the owner of that land, and while they have civil rights that are generally better than most chattel slaves, they are still slaves. The landlord cannot sell them, unless he sells the land they're bound to. In FATAL, "peasants" take that role, while "serfs" are the free peasantry. Fortunately, FATAL isn't going to make me roll to find out Alimin's landlord's social class and discover that he's some kind of landowning slave.

So, once apon a time there was a peasant farmer named Alimin. For some reason, despite not owning a tavern, he decided to purchase himself a serving wench by the name of Yatun. Maybe he sent her to the tavern and garnished her wages, or whatever, fine. An asset-slave. Now, Yatun was afraid of the dark, and purchased herself a young boy called Bidar to carry a torch for her, presumably for when she walked home from the tavern late at night after a hard shift of wenching. Bidar, for reasons known only to himself, purchased a man called Yoyok, who unloads freight at the docks, for whatever reason, I don't even fucking know anymore. Yoyok doesn't like tidying up his own little slave dockworker quarters, so he purchased a chambermaid called Duvinse. In turn, Duvinse purchased a dancing girl to entertain her, named Yustiana. Yustiana, being a vain and conceited sort, bought a girl to act as her cupbearer, named Muriyani. And then Muriyani purchased me, Amsia, to eat out her pussy after a long day of cupbearing.

Randomly generating everything makes for a more realistic game.


Total Dies Rolled ; 304
I almost died laughing from this chain of rolling. So Kobold society can't be all to bad if the peasants can have salves and even slaves can get slaves. Please say there is a chance Amsia will also have a chance to get a slave.
 
Okay, so kobolds take slaves of every race, so I'm going back over that insane chain of command to roll races on everyone but the top dog peasant, who is automatically a kobold. Gender and social class won't change, we're gonna keep using kobold social customs, since we're all slaves in the great nation of koboldia. So I'm just updating the race and randomly generated names of each rung on the ladder. This adds six rolls to the roll total for determining races, but I'm not gonna add the extra 24 for redetermining names, since that feels unfair to the great system to FATAL.

UPDATED CHAIN OF INSANE NESTING-DOLL SLAVE OWNERSHIP

Name ; Alamin
Race ; Kobold
Gender ; Male
Social Class ; Peasant
Occupation ; Farmer

Name ; Milicent Wade
Race ; Human
Gender ; Female
Social Class ; Slave
Occupation ; Wench

Name ; Bidar
Race ; Kobold
Gender ; Male
Social Class ; Slave
Occupation ; Linkboy

Name ; Yoyok
Race ; Kobold
Gender ; Male
Social Class ; Slave
Occupation ; Dockwalloper

Name ; Ass-Eater
Race ; Ogre
Gender ; Female
Social Class ; Slave
Occupation ; Chambermaid

Name ; Stupid-Shit
Race ; Graugach Ogre
Gender ; Female
Social Class ; Slave
Occupation ; Dancer

Name ; Merope
Race ; Subterranean Troll
Gender ; Female
Social Class ; Slave
Occupation ; Cupbearer

Name ; Amsia
Race ; Kobold
Gender ; Female
Social Class ; Slave
Occupation ; Whore

Okay, in fairness I'm increasing the die total by five ; six for rolling the races, +1 for genning the human name (took one more roll than a kobold name) and -2 for genning the ogre names (1 less roll each than a kobold name). Highlights are Ass-Eater the Ogress Chambermaid and Stupid-Shit the Graugrach-Ogress Dancing Girl. Yes, those names were randomly genned. Also, it appears that I'm now the whoreslave of a female subterranean troll. I guess calculating my forehead circumference wasn't a waste of time after all?

Total Dies Rolled ; 309
 
You iconoclastic profaners better shut your high-circumference mouthcunts before I come over there and shut them for you. This is FATAL we're talking about. Where the dice never lie.

CHAPTER SEVEN ; OCCUPATION

Occupation ; Slave
Slave Duties ; Whore

This was to be expected. As my social class is slave, I move straight to the slave table to determine my duties. As a female, I had a 1 in 5 chance of being a whore, and I rolled deep into the whore-end of the table. I didn't even come close to rolling 'wench'. As a slave of kobold society, I should have a full-back scarification marking me as property. FATAL now seems to want me to roll for the social class and occupation of my master. Not only do I have six sisters to roll, but my owner as well. Since there's nothing else to occupy in my chapter seven, I might as well do it

Owner's Name ; Muriyani
Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Gender ; Female

I'm supposed to consult with the GM to determine the race of my owner, but considering we've already determined I live in kobold society, I just went with kobold. Now to roll her social class, and...

Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Occupation ; Slave (Cupbearer)

I rolled slave. Kobolds have a good 50% chance of rolling slave. The game tells me to 'disregard nonsense answers' when it comes to rolling profession, but the Justice subsection seems to infer that Kobold slaves are fined in currency for most criminal infractions, suggesting that kobolds pay their slaves a wage. This is a historically accurate arrangement in certain cultures, as the footnotes I'm never going to bother to read could tell me. I'm going to take this to mean that a slave in kobold society can own property, including slaves. I guess that makes me the whore slave of a cupbearing slave. Now I guess I'll roll my for my mistress's owner to find out whose cup she's bearing.

Owner's Owner's Name ; Yustiana
Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Gender ; Female
Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Dancer
Ffffffffffffffff, okay. I'm a prostitute slave of a cupbearing slave of a dancing-girl slave. Hey, it's your paltry minimum-wage money, girls. Spend it on whatever you like, I guess.

Owner's Owner's Owner's Name ; Duvinse
Owner's Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Owner's Gender ; Female
Owner's Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Chambermaid
This Russian Nesting Doll of slavery has to end somewhere, doesn't it? Just gonna keep on rollin' till somebody finally has a freeman owner.

Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Name ; Yoyok
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Gender ; Male
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Dockwalloper

Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Name ; Bidar
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Gender ; Male
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Linkboy

Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Name ; Yatun
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Gender ; Female
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Slave
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Wench

Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Name ; Alimin
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Culture ; Kobold
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Gender ; Male
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Social Class ; Peasant
Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Owner's Occupation ; Farmer
Alright, there we are. One thing I'll point out is that in the world of FATAL, 'peasants' and 'serfs' are inverted. In real life, a serf is a type of slave bound to the land. They are the property of the owner of that land, and while they have civil rights that are generally better than most chattel slaves, they are still slaves. The landlord cannot sell them, unless he sells the land they're bound to. In FATAL, "peasants" take that role, while "serfs" are the free peasantry. Fortunately, FATAL isn't going to make me roll to find out Alimin's landlord's social class and discover that he's some kind of landowning slave.

So, once apon a time there was a peasant farmer named Alimin. For some reason, despite not owning a tavern, he decided to purchase himself a serving wench by the name of Yatun. Maybe he sent her to the tavern and garnished her wages, or whatever, fine. An asset-slave. Now, Yatun was afraid of the dark, and purchased herself a young boy called Bidar to carry a torch for her, presumably for when she walked home from the tavern late at night after a hard shift of wenching. Bidar, for reasons known only to himself, purchased a man called Yoyok, who unloads freight at the docks, for whatever reason, I don't even fucking know anymore. Yoyok doesn't like tidying up his own little slave dockworker quarters, so he purchased a chambermaid called Duvinse. In turn, Duvinse purchased a dancing girl to entertain her, named Yustiana. Yustiana, being a vain and conceited sort, bought a girl to act as her cupbearer, named Muriyani. And then Muriyani purchased me, Amsia, to eat out her pussy after a long day of cupbearing.

Randomly generating everything makes for a more realistic game.


Total Dies Rolled ; 304
I'm fairly certain that the book with all the setting information for FATAL is floating around the internet somewhere but was only ever half-finished.

Also I'd like to point out again, if you wanted more than one player for your game you'd have to roll a completely new character with only minuscule odds that it would make sense for the two characters to get along with one another.

Oh and finally, looking at the rules you gain 'Advancement Points' to improve your character for Whores points are gained 'for each successfully assisted ejaculation or orgasm a whore gains AP equal to the adjusted number of her Sexual Adeptness skill check'. It seems you can get AP from roleplay too but have fun with your primary method of grinding for AP involve blowjobs- at least until you advance a level and have a chance to replace your occupation with something (hopefully) useful to adventuring.
 
I also get 10 AP for each set of slave-duties I learn, and 1 AP for each day my troll mistress doesn't flog me. One thing about FATAL's character system is I've put so much time into this I'm actually starting to care about little Amsia the underage kobold sex slave. I could imagine a pretty good story coming out if everyone rolled up her sisters and we all tried to escape slavery together, perhaps with a player or two taking protagonistic roles of Ass-Eater and company. Of course, for that to work nobody could just randomly roll up a Bugbear Gladiator King or an Elven Baker, and the characters would have to be migrated to a system that actually works, and I'd prefer it if there was substantially less rolls for orgasm satisfication and accidently raping oneself to death, but hey ; the story of Amsia and her brood of slave-sisters is actually an intriguing place to start an adventure from. Or maybe I've just put way too much time into creating her and don't want to admit how stupid this all is.

Before I forget, I noticed this under the entry for Whores. "Ability Requirements ; 90 Bodily Attractiveness, 90 Facial Attractiveness" It looks like I'm so ugly I failed the entry requirements to whoredom, unfortunately. I guess we'll just assume that Subterranean Troll sixth-level-nested-slave cupbearers aren't the most sexually discerning of people.

CHAPTER EIGHT ; SKILLS

Now it's time to invest my skill points. I dunno, maybe it'll be nice to actually get to choose something myself for a change instead of relying on random chance to determine everything... so, I check the chart, find Kobold Young Adult, roll 1d10, halve it and subtract 1... I roll a two.

Skill Points ; 0

Fug. So ends my choosing of skill points to invest in. I guess I'll just tally up all the racial and occupation skill points I've accrued and put the total here. The only choice I get to make is my weapon proficiency. I'm dropping "spear" as my weapon proficiency, since a spear seems a little unlikely for me to be carrying around, given my occupation and social status. I considered a knife or dagger, the everyman's weapon, since perhaps I've picked one up to cut cheese or slice bread. I considered a warhammer or bec de corbain, since my background as a silverloving kobold has perhaps at least given me some cultural affinity for weapons modelled after the tools of the miner. But in the end, I found something far more suited to my position as a sexually-sadistic whoreslave.

Skill Points Invested
Directional Sense ; 3
Mining ; 3
Trickery ; 3
Weapon (Whip ; Cat'O'Nine Tails) ; 1
Acting (Drama) ; 3
Contortion ; 3
Cosmetics ; 3
Haggling ; 3
Massage ; 3
Seduction ; 5
Sexual Adeptness ; 5


Welp, that was an unexpectedly short chapter, especially since I expected it to be the longest.

Total Dies Rolled ; 310
 
Okay, just re-read the skills chapter. Every time I age a year I'm supposed to roll for skill points to invest. They don't tell me whether I'm supposed to just roll once for a new character, or retroactively roll for every year I've been working, but I think it might be the latter, despite how insanely tedious that would be if I was rolling a 50-year-old (insane tedium is kinda to be expected, at this point). Kobolds start work at age 6 (FUCK YOU FATAL FOR MAKING ME THINK ABOUT SIX-YEAR-OLD WHORES), so I could conceivably make nine rolls for skill points and then spend them all. I'm still not allowed to spend them on anything that isn't a whoring-related skill, they make this very clear.

So, should I roll for each year of skill gain and distribute them, or should I leave my skill points as they are and move on to equipment? What do you guys think?
 
Okay, just re-read the skills chapter. Every time I age a year I'm supposed to roll for skill points to invest. They don't tell me whether I'm supposed to just roll once for a new character, or retroactively roll for every year I've been working, but I think it might be the latter, despite how insanely tedious that would be if I was rolling a 50-year-old (insane tedium is kinda to be expected, at this point). Kobolds start work at age 6 (FUCK YOU FATAL FOR MAKING ME THINK ABOUT SIX-YEAR-OLD WHORES), so I could conceivably make nine rolls for skill points and then spend them all. I'm still not allowed to spend them on anything that isn't a whoring-related skill, they make this very clear.

So, should I roll for each year of skill gain and distribute them, or should I leave my skill points as they are and move on to equipment? What do you guys think?
If you can only invest them in whoring I say just move on. Unless you want to find creative uses for your whoring skills in the non whoring world like mastering your whip skills to Indiana Jones levels.
 
Okay, just re-read the skills chapter. Every time I age a year I'm supposed to roll for skill points to invest. They don't tell me whether I'm supposed to just roll once for a new character, or retroactively roll for every year I've been working, but I think it might be the latter, despite how insanely tedious that would be if I was rolling a 50-year-old (insane tedium is kinda to be expected, at this point). Kobolds start work at age 6 (FUCK YOU FATAL FOR MAKING ME THINK ABOUT SIX-YEAR-OLD WHORES), so I could conceivably make nine rolls for skill points and then spend them all. I'm still not allowed to spend them on anything that isn't a whoring-related skill, they make this very clear.

So, should I roll for each year of skill gain and distribute them, or should I leave my skill points as they are and move on to equipment? What do you guys think?
I say go for moar.

More skills = more ways to encounter the doubtless myriad broken mechanics of this abomination.
 
Okay, just re-read the skills chapter. Every time I age a year I'm supposed to roll for skill points to invest. They don't tell me whether I'm supposed to just roll once for a new character, or retroactively roll for every year I've been working, but I think it might be the latter, despite how insanely tedious that would be if I was rolling a 50-year-old (insane tedium is kinda to be expected, at this point). Kobolds start work at age 6 (FUCK YOU FATAL FOR MAKING ME THINK ABOUT SIX-YEAR-OLD WHORES), so I could conceivably make nine rolls for skill points and then spend them all. I'm still not allowed to spend them on anything that isn't a whoring-related skill, they make this very clear.

So, should I roll for each year of skill gain and distribute them, or should I leave my skill points as they are and move on to equipment? What do you guys think?
Obviously for the true FATAL experience one needs as many pointless dice rolls as possible. After all, what could be more fun than deciding what skills a 8 year old Kobold whore improved in as compared to when she was 7?

The answer is pretty much anything but still.
 
There's a big ridiculous system of Learning Curve vs Skill Check Bell Curve and Base Time Quality and all kinds of other shit that I never had to figure out because I got zero skill points, so I think I'll go back and roll some up.

CHAPTER EIGHT REVISITED ; SKILLS

Okay, reserving my roll of zero for my first skill roll as a young adult, I'll make the other eight rolls and determine how many points I have to invest. I really really don't want to think about which skills I'm learning at which age, so I'm just gonna dump them all as a total.

Skill Points to Invest ; 22

Alright, 22 skill points to invest, but the book says I'm only allowed to invest them in professional skills, or skills I've exercised in the past year. There's also rules about having to split the investment between two or more skills whenever I have more than 3 skills to gain, but I really really don't want to be thinking about which skills I earned before which birthday, so I'm just gonna give myself a hard cap of 14 to any skill (+2 per year, and I only rolled a 0 twice). That should keep me within the rules. Okay, let's look at some skills I could think about taking. Obviously, I could add to the whore skills I listed earlier. Aside from that, my extremely low ethics and morality mean I could consider taking dishonest, thievery type skills that I might have been able to exercise in my duties of whoring. My sexual sadism could perhaps give me an excuse to take rope use and increase my whip skills. 'Cooking' and 'Cleaning' are skills which a personal whoreslave might pick up, but I'm considering that doubtful due to the well-known idiom concerning the making of hoes into housewives. Entertainment skills like 'comedy' or 'dancing' or 'musician' could be worthwhile, but I'll go easy on them due to my very-very low status of whoredom. I could take some language and etiquette skills concerning kobold or troll societies, and some religious knowledge from my average sense of piety. Finally, there's also 'Delousing', the skill of removing lice and bedbugs, which is probably a pretty solid skill for a 7th-level whoreslave of a troll-woman to have. Anyways, here's what I'll go with...

Sexual Adeptness + 8
Cosmetics + 2
Haggling + 2
Pick-Pocketing + 2
Silence + 3
Delousing + 5


By the way, it turns out that I never got an extra free language, I have to learn it via invested skill and two languages is just the cap from my intelligence. So I'm dropping Sapian as a language. I was going to invest in Speak Language, Troll, but the entry on that says that they don't teach it to outsiders. I took +3 to silence instead since "subterranean trolls hate noise". Oh well. Hopefully everyone else in the adventuring party speaks Kobold, and isn't from a race that has to immediately kill me, and doesn't want to just go home and go back to their life as an inkmaker as soon as the adventure begins.

Also, I've noticed that the five senses are listed as skills, but we're not supposed to invest points into them normally. Instead we roll three die for each one and record it down. There's also a randomly generated cap of how many more skillpoints I can invest into them, which I'll record. I never would have noticed this unless I read their individual skill entries, but now that I have, here they are.


Sight ; 19 (investment cap ; 3)
Hearing ; 20 (investment cap ; 3)
Smell ; 15 (investment cap ; 10)
Taste ; 20 (investment cap ; 2)
Touch ; 21 (investment cap ; 6)

It must really suck being a she-troll's whore-slave with such a refined sense of taste. My poor poor kobold. Okay, going over the skills I've picked to make sure I haven't missed anything else, and sure enough, I have. For every skill-point invested into Sexual Adeptness, I gain a Sexual Adeptness Point which I can invest into a sub-specialty, because obviously this is the skill that the entire game is focused around. Alright, so 13 points invested, here's my Sexual Adeptness Specialties.

Cunnilingus ; 7
Positions ; 5
Orgasm Control ; 2

Investing in "positions" lets me utilise doggy style, which reduces the negative modifier my butterface incurs, so uh, hooray, I guess. Also, I just discovered that my free "Weapon (Specific)" skill from being a Kobold counts as 5SP, although it never said anything about that anywhere else. So I'm a +5 whipmistress now, it seems. Final list of skills is as follows...

Directional Sense ; 3
Mining ; 3
Trickery ; 3
Weapon (Whip ; Cat'O'Nine Tails) ; 5
Acting (Drama) ; 3
Contortion ; 3
Cosmetics ; 5
Haggling ; 5
Massage ; 3
Seduction ; 5
Sexual Adeptness ; 13
Pick-Pocketing ; 2
Silence ; 3
Delousing ; 5
Cunnilingus ; 7
Sexual Positions ; 5
Orgasm Control ; 2


Total Dies Rolled ; 354
 
Okay, last chapter and it promises to be brief, since the only equipment allowed is "clothes on my back". Let's go.

CHAPTER NINE ; EQUIPMENT

This is another exercise in choice, but I have to choose what FATAL probably wants me to choose. Alright, my social status roll gives me "clothes on my back" and my profession as a whore gives me an "aiguillette" as a free item. There's no entry on this in the items section, but it's described under the whore occupation as a type of pendant which is a symbol of whoredom. I doubt that this is something that kobold society uses, but I'm going to take it as an item anyway.

Aiguilette (stats not provided)
An aiguilette is a knotted cord that falls from the shoulder and is a color different from the whore's clothes.

Bandeaux (2sp - 1lb - 1/NA/1)
This is a strip of cloth used by females to support and bind their breasts. A bandeaux is wrapped around their upper chest. BCT is 1/4 day for a tailor.

Trousers (6sp - 1lb - 1/NA/1)
This is a tight-fitting combination of breeches and hose. BCT is 1 day for a tailor.

Sandals (4sp / 1lb - 2/NA/5)
Leather footwear consisting of a sole and 1 or more leather straps are sandals. Sandals offer 1CA in protection to the feet. BCT is 1 day for a cobbler.

The stats given alongside each item are the cost in Silver Pieces, the weight in pounds, and then the IP (integrity points) against hacking, piercing and bashing damage respectively. BCT means base time to craft, and CA is I guess a bonus to armour class, I dunno. Okay, I'm done here. I've successfully rolled a FATAL character. 354 dice rolls, but it's worth it. Amsia is fully rolled and ready to play. I'll compile her full character stats shortly.
 
Okay, last chapter and it promises to be brief, since the only equipment allowed is "clothes on my back". Let's go.

CHAPTER NINE ; EQUIPMENT

This is another exercise in choice, but I have to choose what FATAL probably wants me to choose. Alright, my social status roll gives me "clothes on my back" and my profession as a whore gives me an "aiguillette" as a free item. There's no entry on this in the items section, but it's described under the whore occupation as a type of pendant which is a symbol of whoredom. I doubt that this is something that kobold society uses, but I'm going to take it as an item anyway.

Aiguilette (stats not provided)
An aiguilette is a knotted cord that falls from the shoulder and is a color different from the whore's clothes.

Bandeaux (2sp - 1lb - 1/NA/1)
This is a strip of cloth used by females to support and bind their breasts. A bandeaux is wrapped around their upper chest. BCT is 1/4 day for a tailor.

Trousers (6sp - 1lb - 1/NA/1)
This is a tight-fitting combination of breeches and hose. BCT is 1 day for a tailor.

Sandals (4sp / 1lb - 2/NA/5)
Leather footwear consisting of a sole and 1 or more leather straps are sandals. Sandals offer 1CA in protection to the feet. BCT is 1 day for a cobbler.

The stats given alongside each item are the cost in Silver Pieces, the weight in pounds, and then the IP (integrity points) against hacking, piercing and bashing damage respectively. BCT means base time to craft, and CA is I guess a bonus to armour class, I dunno. Okay, I'm done here. I've successfully rolled a FATAL character. 354 dice rolls, but it's worth it. Amsia is fully rolled and ready to play. I'll compile her full character stats shortly.
Oh my god you did it, you actually did it. Are you still sane, do have all your fingers and toes? You can't have come put of that unscathed. The sad part is Amsia is ready to play but there is no party and I doubt anyone else will have the fortitude to roll up a character.
 
No, I'm broken. I will never be sane again. Here's the first three (of fucking eleven) of my character sheets filled out.

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edit ; forgot to fill in my initiative bonus
edit ; also didn't calculate my core ability bonuses, which apparantly i was supposed to do
 
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Yeah, I have to carry over my subability bonuses for every single one of these fuckin skills. When more than one subabilities affect the skill, I have to average them. There are three more pages of this bullshit to do. I'm takin a break, but eventually I'll get it done.
 
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