The "Is Kat Pregnant" speculation thread - MichaelScottShoutingNo.GIF

[harbinger]

what is stopping this dumb fuck to convince Kat to have an abortion

Wasn’t Phil’s high school a Catholic private school? This would imply a Catholic upbringing. Kat is from upper Michigan (not the UP). I lived up in that area for a few years. Again there is a large Catholic population in that area. Catholics are forbidden to use condoms, let alone abortion clinic services. This would also explain the almost-shotgun wedding back in CT. You remember, the one where Phil’s mom was holding this sign...

 

[bigasscigar]

Wasn’t Phil’s high school a Catholic private school? This would imply a Catholic upbringing. Kat is from upper Michigan (not the UP). I lived up in that area for a few years. Again there is a large Catholic population in that area. Catholics are forbidden to use condoms, let alone abortion clinic services. This would also explain the almost-shotgun wedding back in CT. You remember, the one where Phil’s mom was holding this sign...
View attachment 868947

If Phil was Catholic as a child, he definitely isnt now. Hell, pandalee was a fedora tipping atheist and he was with her for years.

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

Wasn’t Phil’s high school a Catholic private school? This would imply a Catholic upbringing. Kat is from upper Michigan (not the UP). I lived up in that area for a few years. Again there is a large Catholic population in that area. Catholics are forbidden to use condoms, let alone abortion clinic services. This would also explain the almost-shotgun wedding back in CT. You remember, the one where Phil’s mom was holding this sign...
View attachment 868947

If Phil was Catholic as a child, he definitely isnt now. Hell, pandalee was a fedora tipping atheist and he was with her for years.

Phil explained in an Ask the King that he used to be Catholic but isn't anymore. He learned that he doesn't have to believe in God or follow the 10 commandments to be a good person. He has said no religion is 100% correct so he doesn't follow any of them.

I would assume Kat had a pretty strict religious upbringing. He mother obviously believed in demonic possession. She also punished her daughters by making them T-pose "assuming the position of Jesus on the cross to feel his pain".

 

[Freshtodeath]

it all makes too much sense.

Pic of kat at wedding looking bloated
DSP's mom gives him money and tells him to get job
DSP has doctors appointments with kat
He is cleaning out storage nook.

Like c'mon she must be preggo. Or maybe DSP is just getting a grill.

 

[GnomeofDoc]

it all makes too much sense.

Pic of kat at wedding looking bloated
DSP's mom gives him money and tells him to get job
DSP has doctors appointments with kat
He is cleaning out storage nook.

Like c'mon she must be preggo. Or maybe DSP is just getting a grill.

Just a little indoor grilling. I like the way you think!

 

[Pargon]

Just a little indoor grilling. I like the way you think!

Paging @Randy Lahey

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

Just a little indoor grilling. I like the way you think!

Didn't the Kat lore get linked to a house where the family died from running a propane heater inside and getting asphyxiated from carbon monoxide?

This all makes perfect sense! Kat is a black widow!

Step 1, hook up with a failing streamer.
2. Move in and get married.
3. Plant the seed for an indoor grill.
4. Streamer dies from carbon monoxide.
5. Inherit his mountains of debt.

Perfect plan.

 

[h0g]

Tinfoil hat time.

I really do think Kat is pregnant now. I chose to believe him before, but now that he is actively lying about every aspect of his personal life, I would not be surprised to find out in a few months that they had a baby.

Beyond the fact that we have not seen a picture of her since the wedding photos, he's been using very specific wording lately, like "muh family" instead of "muh wife". He could just be talking about the damn cat, but I find it suspicious. Now he's tweeting about vaccinations and people being "irresponsible parents". It would also be another way he manipulates Kat and keeps her with him indefinitely.

 

[samovski]

Tinfoil hat time.

I really do think Kat is pregnant now. I chose to believe him before, but now that he is actively lying about every aspect of his personal life, I would not be surprised to find out in a few months that they had a baby.

Beyond the fact that we have not seen a picture of her since the wedding photos, he's been using very specific wording lately, like "muh family" instead of "muh wife". He could just be talking about the damn cat, but I find it suspicious. Now he's tweeting about vaccinations and people being "irresponsible parents". It would also be another way he manipulates Kat and keeps her with him indefinitely.

When I let myself go full autist I do wonder if the cat was him testing the water with his viewers to see how they'd support him with a new member of the family. Instead of going straight to baby he picks a middle-man and sees how it goes. It went well, but mainly because of 1 man, would that make Jeff the man of the house? Seeing as he's the most likely biggest continuous whale for the next while.

If it is a baby I can't wait to see the ensuing shit-storm. I can't envision a world where anyone is happy about the news, viewers and detractors alike. This would be a nuclear reveal compared to his usual puffs of methane.

I don't think it's a baby though, but I kinda hope it is. This is the shakeup we need, not fucking Jasper.

 

[JamFlowMan]

I really do think Kat is pregnant now. I chose to believe him before, but now that he is actively lying about every aspect of his personal life, I would not be surprised to find out in a few months that they had a baby.

Right after surprise wedding I imagined him treating a baby the exact same way and it comes off as too insane. Taking out all the lying and other problems surrounding the wedding in a vacuum "surprise we got married" isn't too strange it's been done before. "Surprise we had a baby and I didn't mention one word about it for 9 months" would be too fucked up.

Maybe i'm alone in this but putting out hours of content 6 days a week and not mentioning one word about your significant other being pregnant is something a sociopath would do and it isn't outside the realm of possibility that Phil would handle it exactly like that.

It's either announce it and use it to get cheers/tips for 9 months (and the following 18 years) or have a sudden need for money because of "taxes" or whatever then "Surprise it was really for a secret baby I couldn't tell you about because those mentally ill detractors would swat the hospital room." Let's just cross our fingers and hope neither never, ever comes to pass.

 

[Sadge-itarius]

Tinfoil hat time.

I really do think Kat is pregnant now. I chose to believe him before, but now that he is actively lying about every aspect of his personal life, I would not be surprised to find out in a few months that they had a baby.

Beyond the fact that we have not seen a picture of her since the wedding photos, he's been using very specific wording lately, like "muh family" instead of "muh wife". He could just be talking about the damn cat, but I find it suspicious. Now he's tweeting about vaccinations and people being "irresponsible parents". It would also be another way he manipulates Kat and keeps her with him indefinitely.

Could you fucking imagine the shitstorm that would ensue from Phil having a kid? Ignoring all the obvious things like the damage having Phil as a dad would cause, just imagine him explaining that to his loyal cultists.

"I've had a kid for the past 8 months now. I'm surprised you guys didn't hear the screaming and crying. It's been such a hassle, which is why I've been taking more bathroom breaks the past few months. Her name's uh...hold on, let me call Kat and ask her. I didn't get tk decide the name.

...Okay, so another fucking idiot moron mentally ill troll just asked in stream chat, 'why would you lie about having a kid of all things? I thought you were honest.' I had to protect my family, you fucking idiot! All the trolls would immediately, FALSELY, report me to CPS using clips out of context saying bullshit like 'I can barely afford to spend any money on food,' or 'I might not be able to keep my house,' shit like that! I HAD to protect my kid from those mentally ill detractors. So FUCK YOU, SilverDeagles, you can catch this ban.

PlanetJeff just did a TWENTY FIVE THOUSAND bitchear, putting him at the top of the cheerleaderboard! He said 'I can't believe people don't see this as a good thing.' I know, PlanetJeff, some people just see anything I do like I'm the fucking antichrist, and they don't even consider that I can claim the baby as a dependent on my income! This is nothing but a GOOD thing, but no, of course cause Phil did it it's wrong, right? Anyway, guys, interactions have been kinda slow tonight, which is a shame because I have another mouth to feed here. HINT HINT."

 

[Fascist Frederick]

You know, I don't think that Kat is knocked up, but it would perfectly explain the "behind the scenes" drama that's "none of our business", along with all the "worst financial situation of my life" begging. Plus everything else Phil has adamantly denied recently has turned out to be true. "We are NOT getting married", gets married. "We are NOT getting a cat", hello Jasper! "We are not having a child"...

And on top of that, his reason for all those things not happening is the same. "Can't afford it!". I really hope he's telling the truth about this one. But it's Phil and he's not on great terms with the truth.

 

[Exceptional Chimp]

Please let it be a baby, and let it be black.

 

[BabygotACKACKACK]

Could you fucking imagine the shitstorm that would ensue from Phil having a kid? Ignoring all the obvious things like the damage having Phil as a dad would cause, just imagine him explaining that to his loyal cultists.

"I've had a kid for the past 8 months now. I'm surprised you guys didn't hear the screaming and crying. It's been such a hassle, which is why I've been taking more bathroom breaks the past few months. Her name's uh...hold on, let me call Kat and ask her. I didn't get tk decide the name.

...Okay, so another fucking idiot moron mentally ill troll just asked in stream chat, 'why would you lie about having a kid of all things? I thought you were honest.' I had to protect my family, you fucking idiot! All the trolls would immediately, FALSELY, report me to CPS using clips out of context saying bullshit like 'I can barely afford to spend any money on food,' or 'I might not be able to keep my house,' shit like that! I HAD to protect my kid from those mentally ill detractors. So FUCK YOU, SilverDeagles, you can catch this ban.

PlanetJeff just did a TWENTY FIVE THOUSAND bitchear, putting him at the top of the cheerleaderboard! He said 'I can't believe people don't see this as a good thing.' I know, PlanetJeff, some people just see anything I do like I'm the fucking antichrist, and they don't even consider that I can claim the baby as a dependent on my income! This is nothing but a GOOD thing, but no, of course cause Phil did it it's wrong, right? Anyway, guys, interactions have been kinda slow tonight, which is a shame because I have another mouth to feed here. HINT HINT."

Holy shit reading that I can already picture that happening already. My fuckin sides are in orbit.

 

[actually]

Tinfoil hat time.

I really do think Kat is pregnant now. I chose to believe him before, but now that he is actively lying about every aspect of his personal life, I would not be surprised to find out in a few months that they had a baby.

Beyond the fact that we have not seen a picture of her since the wedding photos, he's been using very specific wording lately, like "muh family" instead of "muh wife". He could just be talking about the damn cat, but I find it suspicious. Now he's tweeting about vaccinations and people being "irresponsible parents". It would also be another way he manipulates Kat and keeps her with him indefinitely.

You make a solid argument, but the primary reason I don't think it's the case is that I don't think he could resist the lure of using the pregnancy as the ultimate money bait. Think about how excited his tard army were to pay $2000+ to find out they were lied to about a cat. If Phil announced he was having a kid, money would rain from the heavens courtesy of ultra-tards like PlanetJeff. And he would have a host of specific ways to be begging for money: MUH BABY'S DOCTOR VISITS, MUH WIFE (*thumb*), MUH baby furniture, MUH baby clothes, MUH baby food, etc.

I just don't see him resisting the bait so completely for the entire pregnancy.

 

[Sadge-itarius]

I just don't see him resisting the bait so completely for the entire pregnancy.

Reminder that the dude got two grand in one night for announcing that he's spent the last 8 months hiding the existence of a cat. The same guy managed to have a secret wedding, of which his parents allegedly covered the entire cost. Plus an additional few grand for his taxes. And every step along the way, he's been able to convince his wheelchair symbols that he "had to keep it a secret to protect himself and his family." And then they pay him more.

Not to say it's absolute fact he has a baby, but let's use our pattern recognition, shall we? Dude has gotten rewarded for his lies for years now. If he is hiding a kid, he wouldn't be resisting the bait. He'd be taking the bigger bait, the bait that's guaranteed to work on his cult.

 

[BabygotACKACKACK]

You make a solid argument, but the primary reason I don't think it's the case is that I don't think he could resist the lure of using the pregnancy as the ultimate money bait. Think about how excited his tard army were to pay $2000+ to find out they were lied to about a cat. If Phil announced he was having a kid, money would rain from the heavens courtesy of ultra-tards like PlanetJeff. And he would have a host of specific ways to be begging for money: MUH BABY'S DOCTOR VISITS, MUH WIFE (*thumb*), MUH baby furniture, MUH baby clothes, MUH baby food, etc.

I just don't see him resisting the bait so completely for the entire pregnancy.

In the words of lord goutquad “I was Struggling with taxes and it wasn’t a good idea to reveal jasper” aka if I revealed jasper at that time people would question me and the financial situation.

As tempted as he might be to squeal in delight at the thought of the money his piglet will bring. He’s waiting off to reveal anything until the next major begathon so he can get the extra money from his paypigs and Autistic Jeff. He will most likely be like help me raise my piglet dood only detractors don’t donate or have something negative to say

 

[Shambler]

In the words of lord goutquad “I was Struggling with taxes and it wasn’t a good idea to reveal jasper” aka if I revealed jasper at that time people would question me and the financial situation.

As tempted as he might be to squeal in delight at the thought of the money his piglet will bring. He’s waiting off to reveal anything until the next major begathon so he can get the extra money from his paypigs and Autistic Jeff. He will most likely be like help me raise my piglet dood only detractors don’t donate or have something negative to say

revealing a pet when you're in financial strife is different to revealing you're having a kid during financial strife.
he knew the luxury of a pet would have tipped them off too soon so he didn't say it,
but phil knows the sooner he reveals a kid the sooner the kid can start giving him money because thats a human life that people are more willing to shill on him so the kid doesn't end up starving

 

[Sadge-itarius]

revealing a pet when you're in financial strife is different to revealing you're having a kid during financial strife.
he knew the luxury of a pet would have tipped them off too soon so he didn't say it,
but phil knows the sooner he reveals a kid the sooner the kid can start giving him money because thats a human life that people are more willing to shill on him so the kid doesn't end up starving

This is a fair point. HOWEVER, I raise you the like 6 months between losing Leanna and announcing Kat. He played on about being depressed and lonely for those months, as well as needing to save the house of course, when having a girlfriend to do things for could have been an easy "send money idiots" bait. His cult is willing to pay quadruple digit amounts just to hear "good news" as we've established.

 

[Shambler]

This is a fair point. HOWEVER, I raise you the like 6 months between losing Leanna and announcing Kat. He played on about being depressed and lonely for those months, as well as needing to save the house of course, when having a girlfriend to do things for could have been an easy "send money idiots" bait. His cult is willing to pay quadruple digit amounts just to hear "good news" as we've established.

true i did forget that but until phil actually has a kid and is caught lying about how long kat has been pregnant or how long since the kid was born, we'll really never know how he monetizes a child