Megathread The Pooner Zoo - A thread for collecting wild Pooners and posting OC Pooners, and anything Pooner related

[cybertoaster]

Pooners arrested at the Arizona State University Gaza encampment:
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Look at those masculine lips on Tyler:
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Sex:female? They are misgendering all the heckin' doods!

I want to see the result

If something like that was organized and these ivy league pooners, for whom visiting the third world means an expensive cruise and resort, actually went to visit a dirt poor warzone full of depressing starving people (instead of a dancing show with a continental buffet as usual) nothing would happen. Is like iran before the revolution with all the mullahs being cozy with the commies and the latter eating that shit with a spoon. Nothing happened to the commies and other lefties.........until the shah was finally toppled and left. Then the muslim fundies did a 180° and killed the commies, the ones they could catch tho, the rest ran away to the soviet union............I'm kidding! of course they came to the west, commies talk the talk but never walk the walk, they wouldn't be caught dead living in a commieblock having to form lines at 6AM for stale bread and sausages, they rather like in LA.

that raver they captured and raped to death then beheaded

Beheaded when? I remember seeing a dead one on the back of a truck and another clearly raped chick being walked out of a jeep.

>all those dog tattoos

[Insert YOU JUST KNOW meme]

The closest thing to being a heckin' doggo for her is when she's getting banged on all fours by a "gay" guy who is like "yeah I'm really gay bro, that's why I'm fucking your vagina and grabbing your tits bro, that's gay sex bro!"

 

[Candidate No 7]

EMBARRASSING PACKER EXPERIENCE

I don't even know what to say or think right now, I just feel so embarassed. I have a pretty big packer, the Mr. Limpy Large to be exact. No one has ever pointed it out before which has made me comfortable with it. But while walking home today, in my neighbourhood, I walked past a couple of kids playing (Maybe like 8-9 years old? I based it on the size of them.) When I am about to pass, one of them yells "He's showing his dick!" and one of the other kids responded "What are you saying? Shut up!" while I just kept walking and acted like I didn't hear them. I was wearing work pants at the time, kinda like jeans but also sweatpants, hard to explain, and I noticed it had been shifted around but I didn't think my bulge was much different from normal. I wear these pants and my packer all the time but now I feel like I can't wear my packer anymore let alone go outside in fear of them recognizing me, even without my packer. I don't need my neighbourhood to know that I'm trans. I just feel so disgusted and embarassed with myself. Ugh.

Amazing stuff. I only became aware recently that "packers" existed and as I understand they are flaccid-shaped but erect-sized, which is so bizarre. It is meant to duplicate the entirely imaginary joy they think chaps have for having something in their underwear.

 

[Absolutego]

>work pants, like jeans but also sweatpants
lmao being a pooner and still going into nursing is hilarious. Totally not a woman, guys, just went into one of the most female professions ever.

 

[Geoffrey of Zealand]

they are flaccid-shaped but erect-sized

You have to remember that these people's ideas of what a penis is like come entirely from smut fanfiction and furry artists drawing wolf-men in speedos with improbably large "bulges." You'd think that they'd look at actual men and realize this is ridiculous, but considering the rest of their worldview this is probably the least retarded part.

 

[Mad_Dog]

You have to remember that these people's ideas of what a penis is like come entirely from smut fanfiction and furry artists drawing wolf-men in speedos with improbably large "bulges." You'd think that they'd look at actual men and realize this is ridiculous, but considering the rest of their worldview this is probably the least retarded part.

Flaccid penis size can vary wildly during the day, but I doubt little pooner here will swap out her large packer for an extra-small if she's feeling really cold. Most men don't even think about their potentially visible bulge in the first place. We do care about it resting comfortably though, and that's about it. But if we do notice it being too visible, we will try to hide it instead of feeling any so-called "gender euphoria". These girls are so detached from the genuine male experience and they don't even know it.

 

[LinkinParkxNaruto[AMV]]

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Poor doggo is going to be indoctrinated.

New level of self alienation unlocked> You are cancelling your pets on social media

 

[Procrastinhater]

Beheaded when? I remember seeing a dead one on the back of a truck and another clearly raped chick being walked out of a jeep.

I think they mutilated the body afterwards. I could be wrong, it might be another one I was thinking of. Naked people without heads look kinda similar.

EMBARRASSING PACKER EXPERIENCE

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Amazing stuff. I only became aware recently that "packers" existed and as I understand they are flaccid-shaped but erect-sized, which is so bizarre. It is meant to duplicate the entirely imaginary joy they think chaps have for having something in their underwear.

>Mr Limpy Large


Of course she did.
Pooners only experience with penises is probably from Yaoi, of course she went with the biggest, most inconvenient flop dog she could find, with no reference to how annoying it would be to have a permanent, erection sized, flaccid dick flopping about getting in the way.
And then these Pooners will wear like baggy old man boxers where its gonna fall out instead of something that gonna hold it in place.
They're so fucking retarded.
I remember reading a story about a Pooner who only realized (somehow) she's lost her packer out of the bottom of her pants on the bus when she stood up to get off, and she didn't dare bend down to pick it up in case someone saw it was hers, so she just fucking left it there and was whining it was her favorite packer and she'd bought it out of State, could any helpful Doods in the area get her one and mail her it

I just keep picturing the next poor bastard that gets on the bus, homie's backs hurting after a 10 hour shift, he just wants to get home, and then he goes to sit down, and theres a fucking abandoned rubber flaccid penis sitting in front of one of the seats...
Goddamn lol.

 

[cybertoaster]

EMBARRASSING PACKER EXPERIENCE

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Amazing stuff. I only became aware recently that "packers" existed and as I understand they are flaccid-shaped but erect-sized, which is so bizarre. It is meant to duplicate the entirely imaginary joy they think chaps have for having something in their underwear.

You have to be fucking kidding me, they even have brand names now? "mr. limpy"? pooners pay for this shit?

 

[a feel]

Indoctrinated if its lucky. Mark my words sooner or later one of these loons is going to push for trooning out their pets and try to force vets to participate in dog and cat trans surgeries. Inevitably that will lead to female dogs with rot dogs sewn on

At least until the dog spazzes out and chews off its own rot dog

You might be blissfully unaware of this, but experiments have already been made where male dog genitalia from dog cadavers were surgically attached to living female dogs. It was too horrible for me to actually stomach the existing photographs, so you're on your own finding these.... I'm sure stronger kiwis will provide you with links. I'm sorry.

 

[Poonocchio]

You might be blissfully unaware of this, but experiments have already been made where male dog genitalia from dog cadavers were surgically attached to living female dogs. It was too horrible for me to actually stomach the existing photographs, so you're on your own finding these.... I'm sure stronger kiwis will provide you with links. I'm sorry.

Horrors beyond my imagination.. for the love of God, if anyone is curious to find the pictures and post them for others with morbid curiosity, spoiler that shit.

 

[Procrastinhater]

Horrors beyond my imagination.. for the love of God, if anyone is curious to find the pictures and post them for others with morbid curiosity, spoiler that shit.

Yeah I don't want to see that shit. Poor doggo. I can look at decaying rotdogs all day, shit I'm so desensitized from the Internet I used to be able to watch Cartel shit without feeling sick (I think only because you know the guy in the chair is a Sicario that was probably doing the same shit last weekend to the other dudes homies) but anything to do with animals I can't fucking stand.
I stay off the Monkey Fucker thread because I don't want to see one of those fucks lives within driving distance.
Animals and kids (and old folk mostly) are supposed to be protected, at least thats how I was raised and how I try to raise my kids.

 

[Candidate No 7]

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You have to be fucking kidding me, they even have brand names now? "mr. limpy"? pooners pay for this shit?
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Dunno if that's available on your local shopping channel yet, but that copy's definitely improved by reading it aloud in an appreciative tone.

 

[scathefire]

Dunno if that's available on your local shopping channel yet, but that copy's definitely improved by reading it aloud in an appreciative tone.

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"A great choice for FTM and gender non-conforming folks under 5 feet tall" Well, at least they know who they're marketing towards.

 

[Mellorine]

"Designed for FTM and gender non-conforming folks unde 5 feet tall." Fun fact: Midgets have normal sized dicks, which look huge on their midget bodies. (I know this because Mick Foley mentions in one of his autobiographies that the Mexican mini wrestlers love to show off this quirk in the locker room.) But I guess dainty doods demanded diminutive dicks.

 

[Fear&LoathinginMcDonalds]

Have this beautiful masterpiece been posted yet?
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this image creates a red frothing rage in my stomach
these are like all my favorite IPs and these rotdog wearing weirdos just had to go and co-opt them
I'm real tired of seeing yaoi ships of Big Boss and Kaz all over my 'for you' tab on xitter
No, Elon, I'm not a gayboy obsessed pooner, I just like Kojima games, stop this

 

[Sonya-chan]

"A great choice for FTM and gender non-conforming folks under 5 feet tall" Well, at least they know who they're marketing towards.

Why do troons are taller than the average man and vice versa?

Pooners arrested at the Arizona State University Gaza encampment:
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Look at those masculine lips on Tyler:
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>Sex: Female
>Christina, Lauren, Fatima
>All of them are under 5'1

 

[Procrastinhater]

Why do troons are taller than the average man and vice versa?

I don't know but its definitely a thing and its hilarious.
You see Troons with these big fucking Chad jawlines and linebacker shoulders, trying to mince around in their knee socks and spinny skirts, and then Pooners tend to be these tiny 4'9" dumpy goblins with pube 'staches and neck beards.

 

[cybertoaster]

Dunno if that's available on your local shopping channel yet, but that copy's definitely improved by reading it aloud in an appreciative tone.

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That's the best model they could find to show their product?

And $55 for a hunk of plastic? no wonder all these pooners are broke.

 

[Procrastinhater]

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You have to be fucking kidding me, they even have brand names now? "mr. limpy"? pooners pay for this shit?
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https://transguysupply.com/products/mr-limpy

Yup.

The Mr Limpy Medium is 6 inches, so I'm guessing the Mr Limpy Large is gonna be like 8 or 9.
These Pooners really do want the most awkward and inconvenient fake dong devices.
They're so fucking stupid looking.
Imagine walking round with a 9 inch flaccid dick, looking like John fucking Holmes. No wonder those kids were laughing at her.
Imagine finding one of those fucking things in front of a seat on public transport lmao.

 

[Clutter]

You might be blissfully unaware of this, but experiments have already been made where male dog genitalia from dog cadavers were surgically attached to living female dogs. It was too horrible for me to actually stomach the existing photographs, so you're on your own finding these.... I'm sure stronger kiwis will provide you with links. I'm sorry.

Spoiler: small gross correction

Unless there are other groups of people slicing and dicing dogs for heckin validation, they only made frankendicks on the female dogs.

I remember this from the SRS thread. You can thank China for these man-made horrors (politely spoilered by SRS thread superstar batteredpancakes)

I've found another fucked up research paper about a group of Chinese Plastic surgeons experimenting on human female cadavers and female dogs for a new phalloplasty technique involving using muscles from the thigh.