The #Ralphaswamp - 26.66ac parcel in the middle of nowhere - Caldwell Parish, Louisiana.

[REGENDarySumanai]

Is he going to have a Tess of d'Urbervilles moment and beg to distant, well-off branches of his family?

(Ralph, if you're reading: that's a book reference, you wouldn't understand)

That's if he has a wealthy branch of the family and said branch is not aware of him.

 

[AltisticRight]

Ralph could put his natural instincts to use, the swampland might be full of truffles.

 

[SNEED.EXE]

Whatever Ralph builds on the swamp, it can only end one way:

 

[RollerGator]

Can corn grow in a swamp? I will sprinkle seeds by helicopter if it's possible.

 

[Christorian X]

Can corn grow in a swamp? I will sprinkle seeds by helicopter if it's possible.

https://www.heritage.org/energy-economics/commentary/corn-grows-all-too-well-the-swamp

Apparently it does quite well.

 

[OldGuy]

So Ralph is the Boss Hog of that bog?

 

[Sinpie]

Seriously, WTF is wrong with his thumb? The top half of it is bending nearly 90 degrees. Where are his bones? Have they dissolved due to poor diet? I couldn't do that if I tried. Repulsive.

Is it not normal for white people to be able to bend their thumbs like that? Me and other Asians I know can bend our fingers much more than that.

 

[Sam Losco]

Is it not normal for white people to be able to bend their thumbs like that? Me and other Asians I know can bend our fingers much more than that.

I think it's a double-jointed thing.

 

[Eggg]

This might be a dumb question. But why would Ralph's pawpaw buy some swamp land in the middle of nowhere? Any theories?

 

[Lorne Armstrong]

This might be a dumb question. But why would Ralph's pawpaw buy some swamp land in the middle of nowhere? Any theories?

Most likely an inheritance from his daddeh and grandaddeh before him, PawPaw was born and raised in Louisianastan.

 

[Angel Dust]

So realistically, what could he actually DO with the swamp?

 

[Christorian X]

So realistically, what could he actually DO with the swamp?

Realistically he can pay a logging company to come in and cut and replant every 15 - 20 years. His Timberclass is rated at about 3k and acre for wood sale. After paying the loggers for cutting and replanting, he'll turn 15k - 20k profit after a season of successful cutting.

 

[Destro's Last Stand]

The very first thing I thought of when it came out that Ralph owned swampland

 

[ItCouldBeWorse]

The very first thing I thought of when it came out that Ralph owned swampland

Holy fucking shit, he even looks, sounds and behaves like him. Truly the most accurate adaptation of the gunt mythos.

 

[AltisticRight]

So realistically, what could he actually DO with the swamp?

He can build his own version of Jonestown with Nick Fuentes. An AF Catboy compound.

 

[NaggotFigger]

The very first thing I thought of when it came out that Ralph owned swampland

Deadly accurate depiction, so far. Matches with how he owns the swamp and how he acts in both reality and on the internet.
Edit: typo.

 

[Grotesque Bushes]

Deadly accurate depiction, so far. Matches with how he owns the swamp and how he acts in both reality and on the internet.
Edit: typo.

The only difference is that Ralph's cannon is demonstrably smaller

 

[Lobster Cult High Priest]

Who wants to bet that Dingo is squatting in the Ralphaswamp as Ralph’s very first Serf?

 

[Symalsa]

Is this one of these land scams that were popular in the 60's and 70's?

My grandfather was sold on a small lot, along with a bunch of other people. Basically one company bought a giant plot, got the rights to divide it up, and sold each piece for super cheap. I know a little bit about this because the property became mine and I just refused to pay the back taxes (it was only like $700 after decades, so that should indicate how much it was worth). It was especially popular in areas that were difficult to develop and likely had no plans to be developed.

No running water, no electricity, sewage, etc. But theyre always advertised as "ready to build on" land. Its not much different to how a lot of Caribbean property is sold today.

>wow I can have waterfront property on a tropical island for $20,000!

But a lot of boomers fell for these scams. They (or their kids or grandkids) still own them to this day. No neighborhoods or houses were ever built on these properties (in my case) by anyone. The selling point was that "many people have bought in, and neighborhoods will be built in no time". Even when I called them to basically abandon it/give it back, they told me the same thing. And the local tax offices wont even try to come after you for back taxes because its easier to let it sit and hope you pay one day. It was a chore just trying to tell them I was going to abandon it.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Is this one of these land scams that were popular in the 60's and 70's?

My grandfather was sold on a small lot, along with a bunch of other people. Basically one company bought a giant plot, got the rights to divide it up, and sold each piece for super cheap. I know a little bit about this because the property became mine and I just refused to pay the back taxes (it was only like $700 after decades, so that should indicate how much it was worth). It was especially popular in areas that were difficult to develop and likely had no plans to be developed.

No running water, no electricity, sewage, etc. But theyre always advertised as "ready to build on" land. Its not much different to how a lot of Caribbean property is sold today.

>wow I can have waterfront property on a tropical island for $20,000!

But a lot of boomers fell for these scams. They (or their kids or grandkids) still own them to this day. No neighborhoods or houses were ever built on these properties (in my case) by anyone. The selling point was that "many people have bought in, and neighborhoods will be built in no time". Even when I called them to basically abandon it/give it back, they told me the same thing. And the local tax offices wont even try to come after you for back taxes because its easier to let it sit and hope you pay one day. It was a chore just trying to tell them I was going to abandon it.

This fits perfectly as to why pawpaw owned some useless, worthless land that was nowhere near his home.

Boomers, and the previous depression era gen, in the south were very susceptible to these scams because owning land “free and clear” loomed large in in their mind since most spent decades struggling to pay mortgages so this was their chance to own (worthless) land the bank couldn’t take.