Ubisoft Sellout - Bankruptcy Speedrun Any% Thread

[p1138]

Don't forget Beyond Good and Evil 2 being in development hell for God knows how long. Or Rainbow Six Siege X being a disaster of a relaunch and their servers being compromised.


I think that started with Assassin's Creed: Unity not allowing playable female assassins in its co-op. I believe Watch Dogs received some flask for not going all-in on politics with its hacking espionage theming. THEN, it was Far Cry 5 where journalists bitched about how Eden's Gate was leaning into right-wing politics despite the apolitical intent of seizing an American town from separatism.

BGE2 isn't anything, so I wouldn't count it as being anything beyond the current record holder for game supposedly in development hell that probably hasn't really been touched in a decade.

But yes, if you continue going back beyond 2019, it's still a list of one failure after another usually involving their games that follow the generic ubislop formula of open world, finding towers, doing random shit to the point of there being little difference between Far Cry, Watch Dogs, Assassins Creed. Ghost Recon, and some others besides the skin thrown over it based on the theme of the IP.

Fuck, even Rainbow 6 siege flopped when it came out, and with a halfassed relaunch on console after failing on PC did it actually gain any measure of success in the first place as a complete fluke. Ubisoft has been failing forward as a company for a decade now.

 

[whatever I feel like]

Lets be realistic here, Yasuke didn't sink the company, it was just one more fuck up after a series of fuckups.
2 NFT based games
Skull and Bones
Star Wars Outlaws
XDefiant
Avatar
Immortals
Watch Dogs Legion
AC Valhalla
Ghost Recon Breakpoint and Division 2 were dumpster fires at launch
Far Cry with political shit but not enough politics for game journos
AC Odyseey

AC Valhalla and Odyseey sold well so fine, you could say their most recent success was Valhalla released in 2020, and everything else in that 5 year span was a flop. To say that Yasuke sunk the company implies they weren't already completely fucked to begin with.

Throw in releasing M+R Sparks of Hope on Switch 1 when Nintendo advised them to hold it for Switch 2. Even if they did nothing but slightly improved visuals that could have been a tent-pole release for a new Nintendo console, instead it was here and gone in seemingly a week and, IIRC, moved only around 1 million units.

 

[Smashed & Slamed]

Lets be realistic here, Yasuke didn't sink the company, it was just one more fuck up after a series of fuckups.

They also fucked into the ground their cash cow of R6S and even whittled down their less big but stil solvent games like For Honor.
Even Ubi Germany got mismanaged, rushing that new Anno instead of letting it bake like 1800.

 

[TrainWreckWatcher]

I find it funny I was in here telling people to buy ubisoft shorts not less than a week ago and here we are.
I mean, you don't have to be Quasimodo to predict this though - everyone knew.

 

[Oliver Onions]

Here is why Ubisoft India failed with Prince of Persia Sands Of Time. Look at all these "gaming connoisseurs" Indian aunties

View attachment 8468792

Imagine the smell, chat.

Also lmao at a jeet giving a presentation on the importance of diversity and inclusion to a room full of other jeets. Maybe they were talking about the caste system, and not beating the help?

They could have put him in the game as an NPC

That's what the Nioh games did, and nobody got mad about it.

Yasuke is a boss fight in both games, and the first one actually acknowledges that he isn't a samurai and only chooses to fight as one in honour of his lord Nobunaga. This 2 minute cutscene is probably a better and more accurate characterization of Yasuke than the whole of Shadows.

Spoiler: Yasuke Cutscene

 

[Waffle Iron]

Lets be realistic here, Yasuke didn't sink the company, it was just one more fuck up after a series of fuckups.

Sure, he didn't singlehandedly kill ubisoft, but he did delay their money printer series by 2 years and the resulting game did poorly. If he didnt exist they wouldve made more money off a non-sucky AC japan (everyone was waiting to play a ninja ever since AC existed) and the team couldve spend 2 years making the next game. They basically wasted a game and a half for fentanyl floyd.

 

[Deus Exica]

Yasuke didn't sink the company, it was just one more fuck up after a series of fuckups.

You aren't ENTIRELY wrong but you are still massively downplaying Yasuke's blow. Assassin's Creed in Japan was their guaranteed billion dollar game, the most fan requested setting by far. Forcing Samurai Floyd on the players turned their guaranteed hail mary game into a flop, and this was after they spent millions on redesigning the game twice, once to include him, once to cut down his role.

To say nothing of the catastrophic PR disaster that followed. The game was a borderline international incident, and it shined a light on the gross academic misconduct that had surrounded the Yasuke myth since, well, forever. You had Japanese government officials seriously considering banning the game, and that was before Ubisoft made plagiarised merchandise and used one of their biggest symbols for a national tragedy for a funko-tier toy.

If everything else going on at Ubi was like one long, slow-motion car wreck, Yasuke was like the unattended gas pump the car smashes into right at the end, exploding into one big metallic fireball of death.

 

[StacticShock]

You aren't ENTIRELY wrong but you are still massively downplaying Yasuke's blow. Assassin's Creed in Japan was their guaranteed billion dollar game, the most fan requested setting by far. Forcing Samurai Floyd on the players turned their guaranteed hail mary game into a flop, and this was after they spent millions on redesigning the game twice, once to include him, once to cut down his role.

they were drumming yasuke right at the climax of the whole kultur war shit too then the field shifted hard before they could course correct and then there's the attack on titan stuff... so much so people dunk on that rather than on the stranger things far cry 6 thing because ubisoft thought they were fortnite.

 

[Jace on ice]

Rope options up rn.

 

[Hermiöne Granger]

The diversity and inclusion at Ubisoft India

 

[OJ Simpson]

At this point I hate ubisoft and hope they die. Fuck em. Thanks for the memories and great games that you all used to make, but everything has an expiration date, and in this case ubisoft is the food item in the back of the fridge that's been ducking the trash can for far too long.

 

[AnyoneAnything]

Ubisoft ate and killed P.F. (PURE FUCKING) Magic and their titles and from that moment on, I was 100% invested in their downfall. They existed just to ruin and wholeheartedly deserve every inch of this failure.

 

[regalterry]

Assassin's Creed in Japan was their guaranteed billion dollar game

I view AssCreed Japan as Ubisoft's emergency money printer, much like people were joking that SE would remake FF7 only when they got really, really desperate for cash.

It's the kind of premise that would have made them bank regardless of how bland the game was. Only problem is that Ubisoft not only waited too long for Ghost of Tsushima to steal their thunder (and thus invite inevitable comparisons between the two games), but also because they did apparently everything in their power to alienate, antagonize and drive away the customer base.

By that point the company was teetering on the edge, they hadn't made anything memorable in more than a decade, their usual cash cows were showing diminish returns with each new iteration, so AssCreed: Shadows was their one shot to show the public, and more importantly, shareholders and investors, that they still had the talent and acumen necessary to make a profitable product.

A successful Shadows would have been unlikely to save the company, but it would have either delayed the collapse or at least put them in a much stronger negotiation position. Either way, it was the one game they, under no circumstances, could allow themselves to fuck up.

But no, the faggots at the company, both executives and employees, because I just know Yasuke and all the other shit was being pushed both from the top and the bottom, just had to cripple the game in every way imaginable.

If I didn't know that liberals are absolute imbeciles, I would have speculated that Shadows was intentionally sabotaged by a group of people on the inside to make Ubisoft crash and burn, but we all know the game was just the end result of allowing leftism to run rampant through the company for 20 years.

 

[Incecticyder]

I view AssCreed Japan as Ubisoft's emergency money printer, much like people were joking that SE would remake FF7 only when they got really, really desperate for cash.

It's the kind of premise that would have made them bank regardless of how bland the game was. Only problem is that Ubisoft not only waited too long for Ghost of Tsushima to steal their thunder (and thus invite inevitable comparisons between the two games), but also because they did apparently everything in their power to alienate, antagonize and drive away the customer base.

By that point the company was teetering on the edge, they hadn't made anything memorable in more than a decade, their usual cash cows were showing diminish returns with each new iteration, so AssCreed: Shadows was their one shot to show the public, and more importantly, shareholders and investors, that they still had the talent and acumen necessary to make a profitable product.

A successful Shadows would have been unlikely to save the company, but it would have either delayed the collapse or at least put them in a much stronger negotiation position. Either way, it was the one game they, under no circumstances, could allow themselves to fuck up.

But no, the faggots at the company, both executives and employees, because I just know Yasuke and all the other shit was being pushed both from the top and the bottom, just had to cripple the game in every way imaginable.

If I didn't know that liberals are absolute imbeciles, I would have speculated that Shadows was intentionally sabotaged by a group of people on the inside to make Ubisoft crash and burn, but we all know the game was just the end result of allowing leftism to run rampant through the company for 20 years.

They pressed the fire alarm and took a nap. They forgot why the alarm was pressed for and payed the price. They tried to cash in on the protests and that would have been fine if only they had waited for a Civil War era AssCreed game instead. But nooooooo, they wanted to shove the BBC in this game!

 

[ZazietheBeast]

I view AssCreed Japan as Ubisoft's emergency money printer, much like people were joking that SE would remake FF7 only when they got really, really desperate for cash.

It's the kind of premise that would have made them bank regardless of how bland the game was. Only problem is that Ubisoft not only waited too long for Ghost of Tsushima to steal their thunder (and thus invite inevitable comparisons between the two games), but also because they did apparently everything in their power to alienate, antagonize and drive away the customer base.

By that point the company was teetering on the edge, they hadn't made anything memorable in more than a decade, their usual cash cows were showing diminish returns with each new iteration, so AssCreed: Shadows was their one shot to show the public, and more importantly, shareholders and investors, that they still had the talent and acumen necessary to make a profitable product.

A successful Shadows would have been unlikely to save the company, but it would have either delayed the collapse or at least put them in a much stronger negotiation position. Either way, it was the one game they, under no circumstances, could allow themselves to fuck up.

But no, the faggots at the company, both executives and employees, because I just know Yasuke and all the other shit was being pushed both from the top and the bottom, just had to cripple the game in every way imaginable.

If I didn't know that liberals are absolute imbeciles, I would have speculated that Shadows was intentionally sabotaged by a group of people on the inside to make Ubisoft crash and burn, but we all know the game was just the end result of allowing leftism to run rampant through the company for 20 years.

Their next option is gonna have to be WW2 Assassin's Creed. Too bad its never gonna happen because even if they wanted to, their company is too fucked to do anything now.

Hilariously, if you want an assassin rampaging through Nazi Germany, there's Blood Rayne.

 

[whatever I feel like]

Their next option is gonna have to be WW2 Assassin's Creed.

You know, based on that comment I don't think you've ever played an Assassin's Creed game.

 

[Toxic BRAAAAP Mask]

Grummz, so big grain of salt heree, but I'm inclined to believe it lol

 

[Waffle Iron]

You know, based on that comment I don't think you've ever played an Assassin's Creed game.

They had a tiny bit of AC in WW1 in syndicate. But even that felt stretched beyond its limits and I cant imagine AC WW2. Maybe a small more experimental game in which you play as one of the guys planning an assassination on hitler.

 

[TrainWreckWatcher]

Grummz, so big grain of salt heree, but I'm inclined to believe it lolView attachment 8476658

If they hired jeets to do it on the cheap. And I fully would believe this cause its ubisoft.
I can only imagine how bad it was. Stolen models, jeet code, jeet mechanics, jeet everything.
Quality almost as bad as your average Ubisoft title.

 

[Oliver Onions]

To say nothing of the catastrophic PR disaster that followed. The game was a borderline international incident, and it shined a light on the gross academic misconduct that had surrounded the Yasuke myth since, well, forever. You had Japanese government officials seriously considering banning the game, and that was before Ubisoft made plagiarised merchandise and used one of their biggest symbols for a national tragedy for a funko-tier toy.

I think people really overblow this aspect of Shadow's failure. It definitely didn't help, but the majority of players who contributed to making Valhalla Ubisoft's most successful game ever didn't know about any of this shit and probably didn't particularly care about Yasuke being one of the playable characters. Today I will remind them that 99% of consumers don't follow video game news, which is why all the websites are dying.

Even if they'd made it 2 Jap protagonists I think the game would still have significantly underperformed because the people who made up most of Valhalla's playerbase weren't longtime fans of the series and weren't interested in starting over from scratch in a new 100+ hour game. If they wanted a good samurai game they'd play Ghost of Tsushima or Nioh instead.

You know, based on that comment I don't think you've ever played an Assassin's Creed game.

That's pretty much what The Saboteur was, and it seemed to do okay. The obvious choice, in my eyes, would be to finally do the modern day AC game that they continually teased in the original trilogy with Desmond and his Scooby gang, but I don't know what ever became of that dumbass plotline.

I guess modern day AC would just be Watch Dogs, though, and we all know how that ended up.