Weird Dreams Thread

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I had a dream I rented a helicopter to move my stuff to another town, and it was going to be $185 an hour. They told me at the place that I didn't need a license to fly a helicopter. I thought that was odd, but went along with it. Then I went to go get the helicopter, and walked up to it and got in. I suddenly realized I only had money to go one way and that I had to bring it back. Also, I couldn't even pay for the helicopter fuel.

And on top of that, I had no idea how to fly a helicopter anyway. There was a tutorial on how to fly helicopters in it but I couldn't understand it.

So I decided to take the keys to the helicopter back, but I forgot where the rental place was. Then I ran into some friends and they said they knew where it was, but when we went there, it was another helicopter rental place. So we stole a car to try to find the original helicopter place, but the GPS wasn't working, so I made a bunch of random turns and somehow this got me to the right place, and I gave back the key.

Then I realized I still had to move my stuff, so went back to where it was, and realized there was way too much to fit into a helicopter anyway. Then it got even more boring.
 
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I dreamt that me and my sister went to the largest shop in the world. It has everything and I ended up getting lost and locked inside during nighttime. Then for some reason I called somebody a cunt and started trying to mess with them, all while naked and carrying a big jug of honey that I was too terrified to drop.
 
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I dreamed that Chris(tine)'s mom went through a horrible lab accident that caused her to shrink in size by a few inches and fuse DNA with a giraffe. So her upper body was that of a small giraffe and she was in constant pain. Chris then live-blogged himself skinning his mother alive and then posting pictures on Twitter of himself posing with the human/giraffe skin. I accidentally laughed at it in front of my mortified friends, then went online to read up on any updates on the whole fiasco. For some reason, this was the last site I thought to check.
 
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I don't remember the context behind it or what was even going on, but for part of my dream, @AnOminous (looked like John Goodman, but it was him) had gotten so attached to these pink bunny slippers I was wearing that if I so much as walked away with them elsewhere for a bit, he would get extremely depressed and hit the bottle hard.
 
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A few nights ago I dreamed that I was hiking along a massive, looping mountain trail, and it got really snowy at one point, and a bunch of people were following me and trying to give me shit like a hat and gloves and a scarf, even though I was already bundled up. They wouldn't leave me alone, and eventually I lost them when the hiking trail went into a tunnel.
 
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I once had a dream that I was on a beach in England and as I was walking by, I noticed a plain rectangular structure sticking out of the sand - I looked at it and it turned out it has bars on one side and you can look at a dungeon that goes underground through them with Englishmen there chained to a wall by a Muslim gang. It was all visible in broad daylight, unhidden and nobody gave a shit except me. I think it's pretty accurate about the situation the UK is spiraling to.
 
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Two nights ago I had a dream about Greenland. What's weird is the geography, because I'm not exactly an expert in Greenlandic geography. Basically in my dream the capital was exactly where the captial (Godthab/Nuuk) is in reality. I also dreamed that Thule was a bit north of Godthab and that's where all the foreigners lived, and they lived in weird little Hobbit-esque cottages. Well, in terms of the real world, I got the geography completely wrong (Thule is way the fuck on the other side of the island, the northwest corner), but bizarrely, there's a USAF base in Thule, so the foreigner thing was kind of accurate. It's also possible my subconscious was dredging up weird geographical trivia and forging the dream from it.

The really weird part, though, was I dreamt of a third town way the fuck up in the Northeastern corner. It was very small, and it was in a valley in a forest (an ecological impossibility in that area). Obviously that area is all frozen tundra, but when I was reading about Greenland the day after, I learned there's a Danish military base exactly where that town in my dream was and I swear up and down I'd never read about it before.


2 spoopy 4 me

EDIT: Even my dreams are autistic (:_(
 
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weirdest dream - my family , colleagues n girlfriend were trying to kill me by smothering with a pillow .
woke up n found my girl had rolled over me n I was not breathing properly.

woke her up n told her next time this happens she is sleeping in bathtub
 
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So I was with a bunch of my friends from high school and we were walking through this giant desert when all of a sudden Trump appeared from behind a sand dune. He was wearing a suit of armor like a knight. Some of my more liberal friends weren't happy but me and a couple other friends were really honored to be able to meet the president whether we liked him or not. But then Chris in full tomgirl regalia ran up and started yelling at Pmurt and then Chris threw a Transformers toy at his head and then he fell over. He wasn't dead though.

Anyway we kept walking and Chris joined our group. He kept talking about Sonichu and My Little Pony and stuff and everyone else but me really really hated his guts and wanted to leave him behind. But then Chris had to use the bathroom, and suddenly in the middle of nowhere there was this Best Buy so we stopped there to let Chris go to the bathroom. But while we were waiting I saw this really hot guy working there, I think he said his name was Aaron. The moment he laid eyes on me we declared our undying love for one another but we couldn't be together just yet because he still had to finish his shift fixing people's phones. When he got off of his shift we went into the back of the Best Buy to have sex. But when we got back all my friends were really mad at me because I just abandoned them to have sex with this hot guy I just met and I was the one making them bring Chris along. They were about to kick me out of the group when all of a sudden Trump came back and it turns out this whole time Trump was a Transformer and he turned into a giant robot. I didn't notice if he was an Autobot or a Decepticon because I was too impressed by the fact the president just turned into a giant robot to notice. Chris kept trying to yell at him but Trump was about to squish Chris under his giant foot! Then suddenly Null arrived and he was dressed like an '80's rocker. He came between Chris and Trump and said "Gentlemen, you don't have to fight!" and he pulled out an awesome guitar. He played a chord so epic that everyone in the entire world decided to stop fighting and be friends. Trump shrunk down to his normal size and he gave Chris a hug.

Then all of a sudden it got really dark and then it started to rain :winner: symbols. They were about three feet tall by two feet wide and they were a couple of inches thick but they were made of Styrofoam so they didn't hurt when they hit you. All my friends from high school started taking selfies with the :winner: symbols and they said they weren't mad at me anymore. When it stopped raining the clouds parted and this gigantic and beautiful picture of Clyde Cash appeared in the sky. One of my friends yelled out "This is the beginning of the worldwide golden age!" and then everyone started disco dancing to Disco Inferno.

At the end of the song Elmo from Sesame Street came out and talked to me. He said "Taffy, what have you learned today?" (also everyone was calling me Taffy and not my real name for some reason) and I said "Well, I spend too much time on Kiwi Farms and I need to get laid?" and Elmo said "That's right! Also, today's dream was brought to you by the letter F and the number 666." Then everyone started laughing and credits rolled. The credits were all names of Kiwis but I didn't catch who did what. Then at the very end the Kiwi Farms logo appeared and it said "This has been a presentation of Kiwi Farms" and then my avvie appeared and it said "A Salt Water Taffy production." I didn't know I had my own production company.

So does anyone else have dreams with credits at the end?
 
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Salt Water Taffy said:
So I was with a bunch of my friends from high school and we were walking through this giant desert when all of a sudden Trump appeared from behind a sand dune. He was wearing a suit of armor like a knight. Some of my more liberal friends weren't happy but me and a couple other friends were really honored to be able to meet the president whether we liked him or not. But then Chris in full tomgirl regalia ran up and started yelling at Pmurt and then Chris threw a Transformers toy at his head and then he fell over. He wasn't dead though.

Anyway we kept walking and Chris joined our group. He kept talking about Sonichu and My Little Pony and stuff and everyone else but me really really hated his guts and wanted to leave him behind. But then Chris had to use the bathroom, and suddenly in the middle of nowhere there was this Best Buy so we stopped there to let Chris go to the bathroom. But while we were waiting I saw this really hot guy working there, I think he said his name was Aaron. The moment he laid eyes on me we declared our undying love for one another but we couldn't be together just yet because he still had to finish his shift fixing people's phones. When he got off of his shift we went into the back of the Best Buy to have sex. But when we got back all my friends were really mad at me because I just abandoned them to have sex with this hot guy I just met and I was the one making them bring Chris along. They were about to kick me out of the group when all of a sudden Trump came back and it turns out this whole time Trump was a Transformer and he turned into a giant robot. I didn't notice if he was an Autobot or a Decepticon because I was too impressed by the fact the president just turned into a giant robot to notice. Chris kept trying to yell at him but Trump was about to squish Chris under his giant foot! Then suddenly Null arrived and he was dressed like an '80's rocker. He came between Chris and Trump and said "Gentlemen, you don't have to fight!" and he pulled out an awesome guitar. He played a chord so epic that everyone in the entire world decided to stop fighting and be friends. Trump shrunk down to his normal size and he gave Chris a hug.

Then all of a sudden it got really dark and then it started to rain :winner: symbols. They were about three feet tall by two feet wide and they were a couple of inches thick but they were made of Styrofoam so they didn't hurt when they hit you. All my friends from high school started taking selfies with the :winner: symbols and they said they weren't mad at me anymore. When it stopped raining the clouds parted and this gigantic and beautiful picture of Clyde Cash appeared in the sky. One of my friends yelled out "This is the beginning of the worldwide golden age!" and then everyone started disco dancing to Disco Inferno.

At the end of the song Elmo from Sesame Street came out and talked to me. He said "Taffy, what have you learned today?" (also everyone was calling me Taffy and not my real name for some reason) and I said "Well, I spend too much time on Kiwi Farms and I need to get laid?" and Elmo said "That's right! Also, today's dream was brought to you by the letter F and the number 666." Then everyone started laughing and credits rolled. The credits were all names of Kiwis but I didn't catch who did what. Then at the very end the Kiwi Farms logo appeared and it said "This has been a presentation of Kiwi Farms" and then my avvie appeared and it said "A Salt Water Taffy production." I didn't know I had my own production company.

So does anyone else have dreams with credits at the end?
Click to expand...
:story:

No, seriously, this was amazing, I laughed so hard.
 
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Salt Water Taffy said:
When it stopped raining the clouds parted and this gigantic and beautiful picture of Clyde Cash appeared in the sky. One of my friends yelled out "This is the beginning of the worldwide golden age!" and then everyone started disco dancing to Disco Inferno.
Click to expand...

Also, does having a vision of Clyde Cash in the sky count as having a Christorical religious experience?
 
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So I had this weird dream that I was back in high school and had been called in for an appointment, too much traffic blocking the closest route, so I had to cut through the second story to get back down to the first story to the correct hallway where I needed to go. Flight of stairs on the other side of the second floor is blocked off. Kid sitting on the median wall says "Yep, sometimes they do that..."
 
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The other day i had a dream that me and my mom was spending time together, just relaxing and talking. Then all of a sudden i began choaking on something(i think it was a tooth). My mom told me not to worry and that she will get help so she ran out the room and when she came back she brought captain ginyu from dbz to help. So he saved me from choaking, said something motivational, then left.

Thanks captain ginyu
 
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I had a dream the other night that I was in a college class about Nazi Germany where Alex Trebek was the professor. He taught his lecture using Jeopardy categories (the front of the classroom was the Jeopardy board but the rest looked like a normal classroom), where we'd have to ask him something about the Nazis or Hitler ("I'll take Hitler and Himmler for 200") and then he'd explain it.
 
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Last night, I had a dream that The lion king was a religious movie, or perhaps a religion unto itself. (It was unclear)

I just remember a stereotypical black southern preacher singing "praise-uh Sim-buh" with a choir behind him.

Perhaps it was a prophecy about the upcoming live action Lion King, seeing the reaction Black Panther got.
 
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