Weird Dreams Thread

I’ve had this dream a few times lol. It’s always math though.
Thank goodness I have someone else failing dream school with me.

I think a lot of people have dreams like this. My husbands Step Father said he had a nightmare that he got a call from his college and they said that it turned out he didn't have enough credits. So they took his diploma away. He's in his 60s and retired.
 
I had a dream that Ronald McDonald and the rest of the McDonaldland characters had turned evil and were kidnapping children along with other nefarious deeds. As a agent of some do-gooder organization I had to stop them but I was distracted by the fact that I had magically sprouted a massive lady-cock that made it really hard to walk without looking like I was smuggling a Subway footlong in my pants. I think I stopped Ronald just on the basis that he was too horrified to fight back against a futanari-cop.
I need to not drink brandy before bed.
 
Thank goodness I have someone else failing dream school with me.

I think a lot of people have dreams like this. My husbands Step Father said he had a nightmare that he got a call from his college and they said that it turned out he didn't have enough credits. So they took his diploma away. He's in his 60s and retired.

Some time after I finished college and joined the working world, I had a dream that there was some sort of mix-up with my 8th-grade education, so I had to go back for a single day of school to rectify whatever this mix-up was. Needless to say, I got a lot of odd looks from the rest of the class (I don't recall if the teacher explained the situation to them or not).

This seems to go hand in hand with other dreams I've had where I'm reliving my childhood yet I still have all my adult memories.
 
I had a dream that Ronald McDonald and the rest of the McDonaldland characters had turned evil and were kidnapping children along with other nefarious deeds. As a agent of some do-gooder organization I had to stop them but I was distracted by the fact that I had magically sprouted a massive lady-cock that made it really hard to walk without looking like I was smuggling a Subway footlong in my pants. I think I stopped Ronald just on the basis that he was too horrified to fight back against a futanari-cop.
I need to not drink brandy before bed.
I have weird dreams if I drink any sort of alcohol before bed too.
 
I had a dream a couple nights ago where I went to a party at this house on my street which was bigger than it is irl. Met this girl and we went into a bedroom to slam that pussy but for some reason I had two dicks. She wasn't weirded out and she gave a good blowie and I woke up after that. Went to the bathroom and was momentarily weirded out by only having one dick.
 
  • Feels
Reactions: Nekromantik
I think I need to write a collection of short stories about my dreams. I tend to have recurring nightmares that pick up where they left off and continue until the conclusion of the story, it’s wild.

Up until a few nights ago I’d only had two zombie dream sequences that spanned a five year period between the two of them. The second dream sequence I had ended with me killing my son after he but my infant daughter followed by twisting her head to snap her neck as she turned while nursing at my breast. Yeah my dreams are realistic and fucking brutal.

The other night was my first zombie dream since the second set concluded about 10 years ago so I’m curious and terrified to see where it will go.

I’ll spare too much background set up but basic post apocalyptic earth is the scene, however the zombies aren’t the usual type. They’re very normal in appearance and while somewhat slow, are still capable of functioning at a lower level, which includes driving cars.

I’m being pursued by a zombie driving a car that is a cross between a Rob Zombie-esque dragula, Cruella De Ville car, and PT cruiser so a ragged out, no frills car that looks like a pimped out dragster Cruella De Ville car with the sensibility of an American made piece of shit on a Neon chassis. The zombie’s car is not only capable of standard forward and backward movement, but can also drive side to side like a demented and tricked out IKEA shopping cart.

I was driving my car, trying to stay ahead so he couldn’t pull alongside me and do a sideways maneuver but for dream reasons he kept coming alongside and crashing into me, forcing me off the road. Eventually my car ran off the road and spun out, coming to a stop in front of an abandoned house. (Even my horror dreams are cliched).

I grabbed my daughter by the wrist and hauled her out of the car, trying to keep her from screaming and shrieking in fear so the zombie wouldn’t be attracted to us and ran into the house. I tried to lock the door, but even though I threw the dead bolt, the entire bottom half of the door was weakened and the zombie started to make short work of tearing it down.

As he kicked and threw himself at the door, it rattled in its weakened frame and the bottom half of door pushed in several inches so he could reach in a part of his arm and scrabble around to grab at me. I did my best to brace my body against the door and quietly told my nearly hysterical daughter to find a place to hide.

She came back after a short search to let me know there was a basement but I quickly nixed that plan, having watched enough horror movies to know where that would end (even in my panicked dream state) and sent her to look in the front of the house for hiding options, weapons, etc.

As she passed the front windows, I realized the zombie had stopped trying to break down the door and was now moving across the porch in a slow walk (not a zombie shuffle). He reached through the broken windows and his arm grabbed her as she passed by the curtains and started to pull her out of the house.

The clarity of the sun bleached sheer curtains in my dreams....it was so realistic.

As he pulled her to him I grabbed her body in my arms and tried to pull her back, but his strength far surpassed my own. I realized I’d have to try to kill the zombie (destroy the brain) to save my daughter’s life and pulled a knife I’d made from a metal spike.

By this point the zombie was halfway through the broken window, looking up as he pulled my daughter down and through the window and out to the porch, which was a good three feet lower than the floor of the house. The curtain swirled between us while I took careful aim, trying to hit him in the eye and avoid my screaming and terrified child.

I stabbed at his eye, feeling the point puncture and shove through with my weight behind it then hitting resistance as it came to the membrane surrounding his brain. With a an almost audible pop I could feel to the soles of my feet, the shank forced through the lining of his brain and I fell forward and on top of his upturned head as his eyes went blank and he went limp.

That’s where I woke up. The sensation of puncturing his eyeball and brain was so realistic and disturbing it had me all out of sorts for most of the day. People at work kept asking if I was ok because I was so out of sorts but how do you explain that you’re upset because of a dream and not come across as a weak bitch?

I’m kind of dreading the next couple of years I get to dream out this series if the first dream was that gruesome.
 
This is a very complex dream about a fictional, male self acting in a historical drama. It has three layers: my experiences as an actor, my experiences in character, and historical notes on the events underlying the movie.

My experiences in character will be rendered without markup.


[Historical notes will be in square brackets. Note that all of this history is in-dream only; it is certainly influenced by my knowledge of history during the time of the film, but it's not actual history.

(My experiences as an actor will appear in parentheses.)

(The movie is set in WWII-era Poland. The main character, played by Leonardo DiCaprio, is an idealistic young Jewish freedom fighter. I play the grizzled leader of the cell. I'm embarrassed, because although I'm Jewish, I'm also clearly Czech and I worry that everyone will notice this. The director, a brilliant newcomer who gains great acclaim for this first feature film, assures me that no one in America will notice. He's right.)

[DiCaprio's character is based very closely on his real-life namesake, Stanislav "Stanni" Czerniak. They took some liberties with his story, including a love interest that is supported by no accounts at all, but mostly they stuck with the facts. My character is an amalgam of two men who led the cell, mostly the second, Abram Najdorf, who led it for over three years before his death. They took much greater liberties with my character, but he bears Abram's name.]

I am cynical and pragmatic, an obvious foil for Stanni. I resent his greater popularity with the cell, but I don't allow it to affect my actions, and I'm generally seen as the hidden hero of the piece.

[Abram is not known to have been jealous of Stanni, and since the love interest was manufactured, so was the sexual rivalry. Abram acknowledged Stanni's charisma, and used it to make the cell more effective. Stanni knew this, and cooperated with Abram's efforts. He was cannier than the movie gave him credit for being.]

(DiCaprio insisted that I call him "Leo", and was a warm guy and an excellent, hard-working actor. He liked to play chess with me to get into character, and never minded that I beat him. Yes, he was getting paid far more than I was, but I didn't resent this. We all knew that Leo was the main reason this project was getting funded at all, and he didn't steal scenes. After this movie, I went from being a character actor in the Czech Republic to having my pick of major film roles internationally. That, I owe to him, and the director.)

My involvement with Dora Epstein was a real mess. I clearly despised myself for wanting her, yet couldn't help myself. The bitterness of my anger when I found she was sleeping with Stanni almost drove me to suicide, and may have influenced my eventual decision to sacrifice myself.

[As I said, Abram wasn't thought to have been sexually involved with anyone during his time leading the cell. His wife had died early in the purges, but he seemed to have no desire for any other woman. In any case, he was a reserved, careful man, and would not have risked the cell on a love affair.]

(Why the fuck did they have to cast Sarah Silverman? What a pain in the ass! An entitled princess who clearly thought she was on par with Leo in star power and acting ability, and couldn't have been wronger in both cases. Well, like Leo, she was there to pull in bucks, especially with her topless scenes. I got tired of Sarah flopping her bare tits in my face between takes. I, too, was married, but my wife was alive and very capable of jealousy. It surprised me later when I told her about these antics and she just shrugged. "Who can resist you, Karol?" she teased me. "But I just know her cries in bed would be like nails on a chalkboard to you." She mimed an erect penis going limp. I laughed and hugged her. She was probably right.)

Tactically, I'm brilliant. I lead the SS into ambush after ambush, never using the same trick twice, and adapting to their new tactics as they try to cope with my old ones. Not everything I do works as planned, but I always have a contingency plan for failure.

[Abram was not quite as brilliant as he's made out to be in the movie, but he was certainty sharp, and on at least two occasions he correctly predicted the German response to his last attack as a basis for his next one. His real achievements were more basic: He kept the fire going, the food coming, the ammunition in good supply. Occasionally he'd even get explosives, cigarettes, and coffee, and was equally esteemed for all three. The resistance may have loved Stanni more, but they would have killed for Abram. And they did.]

(The director was an absolute genius at the visual depiction of ambush tactics. He could show my thinking just by having the camera adopt my optical perspective, and moving from thing to thing as I put together information. He earned his Oscar. So did Leo. So, perhaps, did I.)

I decide in the end that Stanni must be the man to lead the cell in the last days of the war. It is necessary for someone to distract the SS as they attack our hideout, and as Stanni rises to do it, I knock him out with one punch, order the cell to carry him with them as they escape, and light my last cigarette as I shoulder a captured MG-42 and prepare to engage the SS.

[Abram did die in that raid, but he is not thought to have been suicidal, and he didn't lay a hand on Stanni. It is likely that his decision was made in haste, because for once he was surprised by an ambush. Stanni never claimed afterward to have volunteered to stay behind, and stated repeatedly that everyone got out who could, at Abram's orders. Well, never let the truth get in the way of a good story.]

(That was an interesting scene. I got the best close-ups of the whole movie in those thirty seconds. My wry expression as I shake out the last cigarette, my sigh as I settle in behind the gun...the director did everything possible for me to get a Best Supporting Oscar, and I did. It took a lot of takes to satisfy him, but I never knew an actor to complain that they were spending too much time on his close-ups.)

Stanni led the cell until the liberation by the Russians, and left with Dora for America, where he prospered as the boss of a tire factory. Abram's grave is marked as a member of the War Order of Virtuti Militari.

[There was no Dora. Stanni married a woman he met in America while he was on a book tour for his autobiography. Abram's grave is really a cenotaph; his remains were never found. It was placed on the site of his final stand many years after the war. The non-Jewish Poles did not love him at the time of liberation, and only later did they decide he was worth remembering. He was named a member of the Army of Poland and awarded the Virtuti Militari in 1968, and that was added to his cenotaph at that time.]

(The period after shooting was peaceful at first, then exhausting as I toured to promote the movie, then exhilarating as we swept all of the awards. I gave talk show interviews beyond number, and gave all the credit to Leo and the director. This was taken as modesty by the audience, but it was the simple truth as I saw it. I did my job, but if they had not done theirs, the movie would never have succeeded as it did.)
 
I have to get to that car show, which happens at midnight on New Year Day. I don't know what cars are on show; I just have to get there in order to get away from... I dunno.... let's say I need an alibi. I don't know the venue either except it is a place I'm familiar with. I check all the newspapers for the show. Nothing, but I see an advert of a horror movie called Mrs. President. I turn on the TV and watch an opening ceremony of some sports event in Korea, brilliantly colored ribbons and holographic banners hanging mid-air. Then the stadium turns into the set of a Korean drama. A hunchbacked, elderly woman assisted by her son trudges down slope, then she goes back to a young woman, says "here, this is the tooth you're looking for." The tooth is the parting gift of the young woman's boyfriend, who told her to keep heading north. When she has walked far enough, the tooth will split open and reveal his whereabouts. She has lost the tooth in that village and has stuck there, and now it is too late to follow him. She settled with another woman, who then gets pregnant and dies at childbirth. It is very bloody.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Nekromantik
The dolphins grew extremely long legs, four on each of them, almost spaghetti-like in movement. They climbed out of the ocean in hoards. Everything was fluorescent, hazy pastel colors like in those vaporwave aesthetic graphics.
 
I keep on having a recurring dream where I'm back in school. It always starts with me getting my schedule on the first day, than it cuts to the last day and there's a class that I missed going to. Not like I missed going to a few classes, no I forgot about this class entirely. This time it was Math, last time it was Science. I'm in a panic because I don't know what to do, I've missed this class and never knew about it. I'm trying to figure out how I'm going to graduate and how this could happen, and than I wake up.

I haven't been in any kind of school for years, but it seems I can't escape it. It sucks.
I have this dream pretty frequently, although I don't think I have for the past year or so. A lot of the time, I have to go back to high school, despite being aware that I'm in my late twenties and that I have a master's degree.

I actually read an article earlier this week (Washington Post, maybe?) that said that this specific dream - having to go to a final for a class that you hadn't even been to - was extremely common.
 
I had a dream where I was helping film this documentary about this new civilization they found in space. They had left Earth millions of years ago, settled thousands of star systems, but mostly didn't live on planets but instead giant ring-shaped space colonies (basically like the Halo installations but packed to the brim with cities). Then I went to their space fleet. It was fucking huge. They supposedly had millions of capital ships alone in the fleet, and it was just one of their many fleets like that since they had solar systems full of those ringworld-type structures which each had a tens of billions of people spread out over a few times the area of Earth (as I was told). The guy in charge (of at least that ship), who looked like Bigfoot but dressed like a high ranking military officer, talked about how most people of his race (and other races) had forgotten even the name and location of Earth, but they were excited to return, and were taking this fleet for a visit.

The were a couple of different races I saw on the ship, including giant monkey-looking guys (some looked like Bigfoot, others looked like human-sized chimpanzees with weird hands--these were the most common), a few Reptilians, and a few normal humans. They all spoke some weird language to each other, which I was told resembled no language on Earth and they noted a few weird linguistic features their language had. Then I was taken to a shuttle since I wanted a better look at their ships.

As I flew around (on autopilot), out the window I saw giant ship after giant ship passing me. Each kind of looked like a Star Destroyer (and were about the same size), and each had a giant Jewish star carved into the center of it. When I went back to the ship, three of the Chimpanzee-looking guys were sitting there, and we talked about some stuff (including about their link to the Jews). Then next thing I knew (one Chimp said something like "this will be someday"), I was in the middle of a zoo exhibit, filming a group of three chimpanzees (normal ones) with other chimps around me. These chimps spoke a weird language, but different from the giant chimps and actual IRL chimps, which I could somehow understand. Some chimps wanted to escape, so they started beating the shit out of the other chimps, and threw one off a waterfall to his death.

What does this mean? Are the Jews an ancient conspiracy to take back Earth for the chimpanzees? Is Bigfoot part of this?
 
So, I'm on a road trip. It's just me and Nyarlathotep in an old station wagon driving along. Nyarlathotep is chilling in the back, because that's the only place he can fit, and he really wants roasted pumpkin seeds. But I can't find any pumpkin seeds at any of the gas stations I stop at. Until I finally find a gas station that has pumpkin seeds that is run by Mr. Miyagi.

Mr. Miyagi tells me he'll sell me the seeds if I defeat a super villain that hoards animals of all kinds and uses them as weapons. That is she sends them to run at people and they explode like something out of a Michael Bay movie. Some how I end up fighting her with a giant truck full of yogurt and kill her by spraying it all over her and her pets.

I finally get my pumpkin seeds, and shower them on Nyarlathotep like happy confetti.

And I never even knew where we were going on vacation.
 
  • Like
Reactions: J A N D E K
I had a dream a couple nights ago where I had a job at a mall store. There was this lost little kid wandering around, and I offered to help find his parents. He kept clinging to me as we wandered in circles around the store (which was oddly large for one in a mall) and suddenly I couldn't feel him anymore. I looked down at him, and he was gone. I ran around trying to find him, but I never did before I woke up.
 
Had a dream last night that a guy I knew in high school (who I haven't spoken to in almost a decade) killed his parents, but everyone was ok with it. Like, we were back in high school for some reason, he offed them somehow, and everything was cool. Everyone, including the police, was aware of it. He played in the football game that night, apparently had time to write a book on why he killed them, then came over to my house to chill and smoke weed.

No idea why he was in my dream. We were friends, but not that close - I don't think I ever hung out one on one with the guy. He also wasn't a school shooter/weirdo type of guy, so it doesn't make sense to me on multiple levels.
 
I keep having dreams that this restaurant where I used to work (which closed ten years ago) is doing a "one-night only reopening" which ends up being so successful that it stays open permanently, to my misery and horror. In every version of the dream I'm either alone with a horde of customers descending on me, or I'm incapable of filling a simple order, like a glass of water. Last night though, I realized there was a huge staff at the restaurant (which was mostly made up of my coworkers at my current job) and that I already have a good job and can quit whenever I want. So I quit/woke up.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Catch Your Breath
I too have been having reoccurring school dreams lately. Mine is not being able to find the class I'm supposed to go to because the building I'm in is massive and labyrinth-like.
 
I had a dream that I was playing a very messed up version of Sorry (or some other board game). You had 4 turns to kill this dude with a giant machete who would do nothing the entire time you're trying to attack him. After your 4 turns were up, it was his turn. Nobody won. That fucker was unstoppable. Woke up when my 4th turn ended and he raised his machete. Cold sweats for days.
 
I had a dream earlier that I was in some kind of sitcom from the 1990's and in this random sitcom I was dating Paul Rudd. It was pretty fun until some weirdo was stabbing people for some reason, but at least I had Paul Rudd for a boyfriend.
 
  • Feels
Reactions: Nekromantik
I had a dream that I was writing a final essay for a history class. The professor didn't give me enough time and I couldn't finish it. Thom Yorke was there because his daughter was in the class, told me I was brilliant and dropped me off at my place.
 
Back