What are the dumbest names people’s parents cursed them with?

[kitty shit]

I mean, the german couple that named their son Adolf Hitler didn't exactly do him a favor.

 

[Sneed's Feed And Seed]

One Valentine's weekend, I saw a name at the church nursery that blew my mind: Edge.

So you're saying Edge is a Christian?
Also, if it hasn't already been posted: "Le-a" -- pronounced "Ledasha"

 

[Kari Kamiya]

So you're saying Edge is a Christian?

Legit surprised they just didn't go with "Hedge" as in "hedge of protection".

 

[Pitere pit]

In my country, most South Americans citizens named their kids with anglo names, but badly transcribed. You have Brayans (of Brian) Miltons, and I heard someone called Usnavy, like the army on Murica. Their names are shit but of most of them are chill people.
However, a lot of the white trash names on my cursed land like Kevin, Jessica, Jennifer or Christian are for trash people who are the equivalent of ghetto names on the States.

 

[Distant Stare]

Anything with a - in it

 

[Preferred Penne]

So you're saying Edge is a Christian?

You'd think you know him.

 

[omori]

Years ago I completed a transaction for a guy whose name was some variant of Apocalypse.

 

[Chan Fan]

I knew a family who named their son "Nikolus" because the dad was a Motley Crue fan and wanted to name his son after Nikki Sixx. Oddly enough, everyone just called him Nick (and it was always spelled like that instead of Nik) and his mother always called him by his full name so no one ever referred to him as Nikki, completely defeating the purpose and leaving him with a dumb name he'll have to spell to strangers forever.

 

[ProgKing of the North]

I dunno, I prefer totally off-the-wall names or even crazy ghetto shit to basic bitch white girls butchering names like Maesynn or Kaylynn

 

[Maxliam]

I ran into a girl named MyEbonyBell. Guess what race she was? Ironically she wasn't that ghetto given her uh...ebonics fueled name.

 

[Deodar]

I once knew a family that named their first son Viet and their second Nam.

 

[toilet_rainbow]

I swear I heard someone call out for someone named Anarchy last night

 

[Shokew]

I can think of two crappy female names: Hortense and Prudence.
Remove the "ence" in either and it sounds much less flattering or worth it to name any girl this at birth, really.

 

[toilet_rainbow]

Just saw someone named Retina on Facebook. I think it’s pronounced “ruh-tee-nuh” in her case but I could be wrong.

 

[CashMoney!]

Here are some classics I see on a sign in sheet every day.

- Meaa
- Ylva (el-vah, probably Welsh)
- J'viah (like Xavier with a J)

Edit: I will peruse a mom group later. They have some fucking horrors.

 

[Freddy Freaker]

Theon

Also Lily Allen's brother is Theon Greyjoy and he’s now more famous than her, which is hilarious because she wrote an entire song telling him to get off his arse and get a job:

 

[Grim]

I once worked at a pharmacy and came across so many dumb names. The two I most remember were a set of fraternal twins, Diamond (girl) and Dia'mond (boy), and a set of sisters named Brittany Lynn and Brittney Lynn. The mom of the sisters gave me some combination of the girl's birthdays when she brought up the prescription. It was a clusterfuck trying to get that under the right profile.

 

[MeganDodgedABullet]

I used to know a kid in middle school named Gaylord. This was in the mid-90s, so you can imagine how much the poor bastard got picked on.

Know a "Gayeland" and his sister "Quaile" .
They are spawn of a feather brained rich hippy couple, so ended up in paid schools rather than govt ones where they'd have gotten daily swirlies....

 

[Cuck Shack]

I know a woman who named her child Daemon which is an archaic spelling of demon and horrible butchery of the name Damon. The child turned out exactly as you would expect.

 

[From The Uncanny Valley]

Girls named Spencer, Skyler, or Dylan.