What does Chris expect from life?

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A woman who is interested in fat, unhygienic tomgirls to take take of him, accept his pickle into her china, and provide him with money so he can play vidya all day and continue to try to find a way to return to his high school years, where he had "friends", people were rarely (compared to the past few years) mean to him, and, when people were mean, they were punished in some way, whether by Chris' "hired help" protectors or the school administration.
 
Kyoosand said:
Boyfriends are banned
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Sometimes I wonder... if Chris had a girlfriend who love him and who presented no real risk of leaving him, what would his opinion toward other girls' boyfriends be?
 
I think Dire Straits told us what Chris wants from life: Money for nothing and chicks for free...
 
Vodka's My BFF said:
I think Dire Straits told us what Chris wants from life: Money for nothing and chicks for free...
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We got to get some gal-pal covens, custom sweetheart deliver-ay-ay-ays - We gotta break these poo-stained vibrators, we gotta sell Bob's colour T.Veeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
 
Pinhead said:
Vodka's My BFF said:
I think Dire Straits told us what Chris wants from life: Money for nothing and chicks for free...
Click to expand...

We got to get some gal-pal covens, custom sweetheart deliver-ay-ay-ays - We gotta break these poo-stained vibrators, we gotta sell Bob's colour T.Veeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Click to expand...

See the rotund tomgirl with the earring and the makeup
Yeah buddy that's his own unwashed hair
That rotund tomgirl got Sonichu on a chain
That rotund tomgirl he's got a creepy stare
 
Alec Benson Leary said:
Kyoosand said:
Boyfriends are banned
Click to expand...
Sometimes I wonder... if Chris had a girlfriend who love him and who presented no real risk of leaving him, what would his opinion toward other girls' boyfriends be?
Click to expand...

Most likely that if they're not sucking him off (metaphorically, natch), then fuck them. Same as usual.
 
Man, I remember when the first response would have been those Sailor Moon DVDs.
 
Batman said:
Alec Benson Leary said:
Kyoosand said:
Boyfriends are banned
Click to expand...
Sometimes I wonder... if Chris had a girlfriend who love him and who presented no real risk of leaving him, what would his opinion toward other girls' boyfriends be?
Click to expand...

You've made me think of something. If Chris, hypothetically, could have absolutely any girl he chose, what would his attitude to fidelity be like?
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Let's ask :julay: and Panda Halo. Or Ivy and Vanessa Hudgens.
 
Ja'mie said:
Let's ask :julay: and Panda Halo. Or Ivy and Vanessa Hudgens.
Click to expand...

Yeah, but I mean actual girls, not trolls. If he could be physically intimate with any woman he chose, would he choose one woman or would he (true to form) be a total fuckwad and sleep around?
 
As far as he knew, they were all real, if only for a while. And he was all too happy to go try to slut it up until they put a foot down.

Semi related: IIRC, he and one of the trollsweets had a bit of a spat because Chris wanted to go to a gentlemen's club but balked at her going to see male strippers.
 
You know something? After all these years of wondering, the answer finally dawned on me just now.

Why does Chris actually think he stands a chance getting a girlfriend who will look after him?

A: Because he's seen his own mother doing it and it worked for her.

Barb had been a barfly white trash leech all of her life and she hopped from one BF to another (literally). I doubt even she knows for sure who Cole's real father was.

And when one BF has outlasted his usefulness, he's cast aside like an empty peanut shell and Count Barbula goes out seeking a new SugarDaddy to latch onto.

And one night in the early 80's at some bar's Karaoke Night, in comes shuffling this girlfriend-free boy named Robert Chandler, completely unaware what he's stepping into. Poor old coot never stood a chance.
 
Kyoosand said:
You know something? After all these years of wondering, the answer finally dawned on me just now.

Why does Chris actually think he stands a chance getting a girlfriend who will look after him?

A: Because he's seen his own mother doing it and it worked for her.

Barb had been a barfly white trash leech all of her life and she hopped from one BF to another (literally). I doubt even she knows for sure who Coleslaw's real father was.

And when one BF has outlasted his usefulness, he's cast aside like an empty peanut shell and Count Barbula goes out seeking a new SugarDaddy to latch onto.

And one night in the early 80's at some bar's Karaoke Night, in comes shuffling this girlfriend-free boy named Robert Chandler, completely unaware what he's stepping into. Poor old coot never stood a chance.
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I dunno, there is a lot of supposition in that idea. We know very little of Barb's life but we do know she worked most of her life which is still leagues ahead of Chrissy who held a job for a record of 3 days.

Not that I'm defending her but Christory is already full of misinformation.
 
Batman said:
You've made me think of something. If Chris, hypothetically, could have absolutely any girl he chose, what would his attitude to fidelity be like?
Click to expand...
He'd probably go along with it if another girl broke down his door and offered him china, but that's literally what it would take. He wouldn't cheat on his own initiative, any more than he'd do anything else on his own initiative.
 
Kosher Dill said:
Batman said:
You've made me think of something. If Chris, hypothetically, could have absolutely any girl he chose, what would his attitude to fidelity be like?
Click to expand...
He'd probably go along with it if another girl broke down his door and offered him china, but that's literally what it would take. He wouldn't cheat on his own initiative, any more than he'd do anything else on his own initiative.
Click to expand...

I would agree with this, Chrissy longs for comfort rather then sex I think. From what I know his sex drive is actually pretty low so I don't think he'd really be tempted to cheat on his own. If a woman who met his standards jumped him he would just go along for the ride but I cant see him seeking out multiple partners.

Of course all of this is the grossest hypothetical, I don't believe for one second that a woman exists who would find Chrissy an attractive partner. If she find Chrissy attractive she's already out of reach; being locked up in a mental institute. :D
 
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