What food makes your poo the worst?

Gluten. I had giant coke can diameter turds for years until I went gluten-free in 2014. I know immediately when I've accidentally eaten gluten now because it makes me feel so nauseated.

The turds were normal texture and not smelly, but they were so big they were giving me slow-transit constipation. I still have lasting effects from this, because my colossal logs stretched and desensitised the nerves in my guts so that I don't get the urge to go until it's urgent and crampy.
 
  • Horrifying
  • Like
Reactions: indomitable snowman, Mesh Gear Fox, CastrationFrustration and 2 others
KFC. The spices they use are vile like a nuclear carpet bombing of my gut. It's worse than Indian food.
 
Adrenochrome Dreams said:
Gluten. I had giant coke can diameter turds for years until I went gluten-free in 2014. I know immediately when I've accidentally eaten gluten now because it makes me feel so nauseated.

The turds were normal texture and not smelly, but they were so big they were giving me slow-transit constipation. I still have lasting effects from this, because my colossal logs stretched and desensitised the nerves in my guts so that I don't get the urge to go until it's urgent and crampy.
Click to expand...
Are you a homosexual by any chance? If so, bottom? You got the training might as well put it into practice ;)
 
  • Like
  • Islamic Content
Reactions: Caesare, Uranus Pink, Mesh Gear Fox and 2 others
Gangster Talk said:
If I eat curry I have to spend an hour on the can shitting fire
Click to expand...
Yeah, yakub made you insolent ypipo have that failsafe so us righteous BIPOC folx could conquer yo cavebeast ass.....
 
fluxeon said:
One thing I can't fathom is Korean Samyang 2x Spicy Buldak. It is insanely hot but doesn't appear to have any normal red chilli in it, instead some brown sauce.
Nobody I know except for grifting youtubers like Emmymade can eat this shit sensibly.
Click to expand...
I find the 2X buldak stuff does the same to me. I normally save the spice sauce packet and add a little bit to every wok full of stir fry noodles I make, using the whole sauce packet just makes the ramen painful to eat, you don't taste anything, just pain.
 
  • Agree
Reactions: ComStar
Most notable thing for me is some leftover Chinese takeout. Emphasis on some as I don't have any issues with the place I frequent nowadays. The places my parents would go to before they retired however gave me total gutrot.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Fried-Rice12
Bare with me, but Kraft Mac & Cheese. I don't fucking know why, I'm not even lactose intolerant, but it gives me the worst diarrhea. It's probably the artificial cheese packet that comes with it, but I get the absolute worst shits after a bowl of this nuclear pasta. And God help you if you're also on your period, because you're adding ketchup to that shit whether you like it or not.
 
  • Islamic Content
  • Winner
Reactions: Caesare, Uranus Pink and Local Fed
Adrenochrome Dreams said:
Gluten. I had giant coke can diameter turds for years until I went gluten-free in 2014. I know immediately when I've accidentally eaten gluten now because it makes me feel so nauseated.

The turds were normal texture and not smelly, but they were so big they were giving me slow-transit constipation. I still have lasting effects from this, because my colossal logs stretched and desensitised the nerves in my guts so that I don't get the urge to go until it's urgent and crampy.
Click to expand...
With an anus that big you should have been making videos about it.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Uranus Pink
I am a bread guy. I bake it myself and only eat it fresh. I bake it per serving not a whole loaf just what I need.
Sometimes in the am you just don't have the time it takes at least 45 minutes for it to bake and cool enough to cut it and you still need some time to prepare and actually consume it.
In that case I've been known to cut up an onion and a clove or two or garlic, bake it with butter and apply cayenne paprika powder and so on on the onion in the pan, once baked grate some gouda toss it in and break three eggs. stir it all in the pan, bake until egg is done. Usually covered with another pan while baking on lowish heat. Apply salt and ground black pepper.
Once you eat that it takes about ten minutes for the extreme wetness to build inside and knock on the door and you better be quick about it.
It's the only thing that does something like that to me.

PXL_20240112_113949396.jpg
 
fluxeon said:
There are many disgusting porno vids of anal annihilation, e.g. Siswet, Hotkinkyjo.
However, there are some occasions of perfect art. I posit Roxy Raye and Chanel Preston with the "Fruit Loops" scene with Mike Adriano. An absolute masterpiece.
Click to expand...
In a different life id almost be ashamed to know those names. But I have 258gb of Korra pornreceived_363390263075760.gif
 
Last edited:
  • Winner
  • Lunacy
  • Horrifying
Reactions: Die and Become, Uranus Pink, Fried-Rice12 and 1 other person
Whey Protein shake mixed with whole milk + gummy multivitamin.
For some reason that gives my poo the consistency of modeling clay that's been hydrated with Elmer's Glue.
It comes out like soft serve ice cream and super sticky.
I've literally gone through 1/4 of a roll of toilet paper before saying fuck it, jumping in the shower and blasting my butthole with the shower head.
It never stops streaking up the TP.
If I KNOW it's going to be like that and I hit up a public bathroom somewhere I always check the toilet paper stock in the stall before committing to said stall.
It also streaks up the bowl heavily post flush. It's kinda funny in public because I'll just leave that horror show for the next guy.
 
Valstrax said:
Bare with me, but Kraft Mac & Cheese. I don't fucking know why, I'm not even lactose intolerant, but it gives me the worst diarrhea. It's probably the artificial cheese packet that comes with it, but I get the absolute worst shits after a bowl of this nuclear pasta. And God help you if you're also on your period, because you're adding ketchup to that shit whether you like it or not.
Click to expand...

I have a similar reaction to it, but sometimes I just really want a bowl of that goyslop and am willing to pay the price. It's a great cure for constipation, too.
 
  • Like
  • Thunk-Provoking
Reactions: Super Guido and Valstrax
Not really food but if I have a few cans of guinness following a bottle of buckfast I'm shitting charcoal tar logs the next day. arsehole is red raw afterwards and need to go to the toilet for a safety wipe through the day.
 
  • Feels
Reactions: Super Guido
boofit said:
I am a bread guy. I bake it myself and only eat it fresh. I bake it per serving not a whole loaf just what I need.
Sometimes in the am you just don't have the time it takes at least 45 minutes for it to bake and cool enough to cut it and you still need some time to prepare and actually consume it.
In that case I've been known to cut up an onion and a clove or two or garlic, bake it with butter and apply cayenne paprika powder and so on on the onion in the pan, once baked grate some gouda toss it in and break three eggs. stir it all in the pan, bake until egg is done. Usually covered with another pan while baking on lowish heat. Apply salt and ground black pepper.
Once you eat that it takes about ten minutes for the extreme wetness to build inside and knock on the door and you better be quick about it.
It's the only thing that does something like that to me.

View attachment 5639170
Click to expand...
Onion / garlic is a possible fodmap issue.
 
  • Informative
Reactions: Begemot and boofit
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back