What Have You Cooked Recently?

[Robotic Richard Simmons]

I made roasted turkey breast and home made gravy from the skin and fat I rendered down. The stuffing was packaged because I was feeling lazy. But the patty is broccoli I chopped in the food processor with cheddar, parmesan, breadcrumbs, onions, egg and garlic. Baked and flipped half way = amazing.

I need more ideas for what to do with an absurd amount of apples.

I always make apple tarts when we harvest around the mid to late fall. I do puff pastry with frangipane topped with sightly sweetened and spiced apples soaked in brandy.

 

[An Ghost]

blini

Spoiler

im already good at making crepes and this is sort of between that and a regular pancake
similar to japanese okonomiyaki you just put whatever toppings you want in it. did keilbasa, pepper and onions, fried egg, raspberry jam, and chocolate sauce in whatever combo people wanted. essentially served them as breton gallete, desert crepe, and everything in between.

 

[Spunky Dong]

I dont even know how to operate a microwave mommy makes everything for me.

 

[Judge Holden]

Gentlemen, for your approval I will now describe the Magnum Opus of culinary autism I randomly created today

The BTK

- picture unrelated -

1) Start with slices of Rye or Granary sourdough you made the day before with starter you have been stalking for weeks to ensure quality.

2) Now suffocate them with a generous amount of homemade Kimchi that is spicy enough to torture any weakling who tries to eat it...or hell make it mild if you like, im not the freakin kimchi police.

3) Bind this with a drizzle-smear of either homamde mayo or whichever mayo based sauce tickles your fancy the most.

4) Layer this thiccly with sliced tomatos of your choice, personally I used the last of some homemade sundried tomatoes whose recipe I have previously linked for a truly mindfucking taste experience

5) Now atop this put your freshly killed* bacon, fried to whichever crispness you prefer. Personally I cut the bacon into smaller bite sized servings before applying since it makes cutting the sanwiches up into mouth sized pieces that much easier

Now sit back and enjoy your Bacon, Tomato, and Kimchi masterpiece

*ok I admit im slightly reaching with the BTK analogues here but whatever

 

[omori]

Tricky Dick Salad. (Watergate Salad)

 

[Robotic Richard Simmons]

View attachment 904468
Tricky Dick Salad. (Watergate Salad)

That looks horrifying.

 

[Cheeseburger Picnic]

blini

Spoiler

im already good at making crepes and this is sort of between that and a regular pancake
similar to japanese okonomiyaki you just put whatever toppings you want in it. did keilbasa, pepper and onions, fried egg, raspberry jam, and chocolate sauce in whatever combo people wanted. essentially served them as breton gallete, desert crepe, and everything in between.

lol your cat owns

 

[omori]

That looks horrifying.

Actually really fucking good.

 

[Judge Holden]

Actually really fucking good.

Same with so many things I love. They look like shit, often smell like shit, yet the moment it hits your palate its fucking perfection

 

[XYZpdq]

campfire chicken thighs. Very easy to cook over a campfire in a small saute pan, much easier than steak, where you really have to know what you're doing as the heat varies so much. It's almost impossible to fuck up the thighs, if you overcook them by a few minutes it really doesn't matter.

I buy them pre-seasoned makes it much easier, if a bit more expensive. Chicken thighs are cheap AF tho.

Yeah chicken thighs are pretty good, cheap, and easy.
My usual way
Season the fuck out of the bottom, flip them, pull the skin back, season under the skin, put the skin back in place, season the top of the skin. Bake a while skin up, flip them and bake about half a while, flip again to finish it off.

 

[AnOminous]

In ridiculous recipes I had something I called Manson chicken which was just stabbing chicken meat over and over while applying jerk rub and garlic and whatever else I had and then letting it sit for a few days and then viciously charring it and serving it over rice or couscous or whatever.

 

[Grotesque Bushes]

I've just made pan fried halloumi with some random ass store bought salad on the side, and it's the tastiest thing I've eaten in a while. That goddamn cheese has to be matured in crack for how much i crave it.

 

[Judge Holden]

Also here is the next in my series of Serial Killer themed Sandwiches/dishes involving my new love of kimchi

The Ed Gein with Extra Protein

- picture unrelated -

1) Scavange a carcass for some chicken breast*, pound it flat for sandwich convenience and brine it in whichever way you like for a few hours.

2) Once brined coat it with a mix of seasoned breadcrumbs and ground pork rinds/pork scratchings which for those who dont know are the super crispy results of frying pig skin. Now either fry it or bake it to the point where it is cooked and crispy.**

2) Plunder your fridge for more flesh, specifically bacon and fry/bake it crispy. you dont need much just enough for a bit of crunch and bacon flavour to compliment the chicken and what comes next

3) Get some eggs, fresh from their mother's chicken-cunny*** and boil to just hard boiled so the yolk doesnt turn to chalk. Once cool chop roughly and mix with some smokey mayo****

4) Smear the bottom a slice of sourdough with some sweet apple pickle/chutney and grate however much sharp cheddar cheese you prefer*****. Now layer on as much rotting, festering, decomposing kimchi****** as you like, cover with a thicc layer of eggs, top with the bacon, and atop all this with maybe another smear of smoky sauce just to bind it, layer your chicken. You can now put another slice on top, or if you are like me and you prefer this proverbial coffin to be left open just have the one slice of bread, and cut the resulting open sandwich into easily handled pieces.

You will find this is an ideal breakfast sandwich packed with protein, vegetables, and all kinds of complimentary flavours. For the perfect eating experience I suggest you play this as loud as socially acceptable while you dine

* or just get a pack of chicken breasts from the store...yeah actually this will probably be the easiest option
** I am being intentionally loose with the description here because I trust yall have your own preference for brine/seasoning/breading/cooking with chicken breast. Also you may wish to do this step in advance and in a batch so you have plenty of glorious chicken for whichever sordid purpose you desire.
*** seriously the fresher the better with eggs, flavour and texture of fresh free range eggs is a league above shit thats been sitting around on a supermarket shelf for weeks
**** just mix some homemade mayo with smoked paprika, a teaspoon of yellow mustard, maybe a bit of lemon juice, and if you like some hot sauce and it should suffice
***** if this seems incongruous with the serial killer theme you clearly need to read up on your Ed Gein lore
****** the rotting, festering, and decomposing in question is just the natural fermentation process

 

[Arcturus]

Tonight I made venison chili with some deer meat that my cousin just got processed. And I tried out a low calorie blueberry muffin recipe I found. They didn't turn out as fluffy and rounded as normal blueberry muffins but they were pretty good anyway. I sprinkled a little jaggery on top. If you like something granulated that's not too sweet and has a flavor between molasses and caramel, I highly recommend jaggery. It's unprocessed sugarcane sap. You can either get a big block of it or find it granulated at most Indian grocery stores or online. I replace a portion of sugar with it in almost everything I bake and it adds a lot of flavor depth and it's better for you.

Also recently got charged with baking some stuff for my in-laws to take home on a road trip. Oatmeal raisin cookies with walnuts and chocolate chip cookies. Again. Jaggery. Try it. Replace just like 1/3 of the sugar in any baked goods with it.

 

[XYZpdq]

Had some bacon grease leftover, did some red onion, horseradish, mushrooms, jalapeno, and a bunch of paprika. Stirred and sauteed on mostly low, stirred in raw ground beef, cooked that for a while stirring, splashed the tail end of a carton of heavy cream.
Pretty good.

 

[HamFan]

I made kefta with ground turkey. No particular reason for turkey (instead of lamb or beef), except I picked some up on sale and thought I'd try something different.
It was easily the best use of ground turkey I ever tasted. I served it with onion, olives, homegrown tomatoes, homemade yellow rice and tzatziki, and (store-bought) pita.

 

[An Ghost]

Tatertot casserole. Ground beef, peppers, onions, and a can of tomato soup with mozzarella and tots baked together. The meat and Italian spices with the potatoes reminded me of Shepard’s pie.

At the same time, quinoa chili with like a dozen spices. Showing somebody how nice meal prep for the week is.

 

[GeorgiaGuidestones]

Made this beef lo mein recipe. I usually find some way to fuck up Chinese-American dishes, but this one turned out perfect.

 

[MerriedxReldnahc]

Earlier this week I managed to fuck up 7-up Jello salad and was so sad. When you make Jello, you need to pour the powder into the hot/boiling water and just leave it alone for a bit so it can properly dissolve before doing anything else. The old-timey recipe I was folllowing didn't remind my dumb ass to do that so the Jello didn't Jello and I was left with a mold full of dissapointment. At least I didn't go all out and try to make it creamy with Cool Whip. Fucking up that would have probably produced tears.

To make up for it I made some peanut butter fudge today using an Alton Brown recipe. Very easy, you just melt 8oz butter with 1 cup of peanut butter, stir in some weird leftover amount of chocolate chips that wern't in the recipe but I added anyway, 1 teaspoon of vanilla, and a pound of powdered sugar. Mix that up and pour it into a 8x8 pan lined with parchment paper, stick that bitch in the fridge for two hours and you've got yourself some fudge. It's very tasty, but a little too sweet. Next time I make it I'm going to decrease the sugar, increase the chocolate, and maybe add some salt. The saltiness of the peanut butter comes through a bit, but I think it's needing more.

 

[Robotic Richard Simmons]

Peach pie. Crust from scratch. My place smells like butter and peaches. Have to wait 2-5 hours for it to cool... https://youtu.be/uMyCa35_mOg