Containment What If?

Re: What if Chris gets a sweetheart and then she cheats on h

somejerk said:
Pikonic said:
I did some digging and found this.
http://www.sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_25#This_is_perhaps_the_worst_advice_Chris_has_ever_given

In Mailbag 25, a fan asked his advice on his cheating girlfriend.

Dear Chris,
I just caught my girlfriend cheating on me. Now, I've heard that you're supposed to stay with your first girlfriend because no one else will take her place, but I'm in a bit of a dilemma. What would you do, Christian, if your true and honest sweetheart ever went after another man behind your back?
Sincerely, eddie.
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The response
I would talk with her; tell her how you feel about her doing those things with this other dude, but DO NOT voice threat or anger; Maintain a CALM Voice Tone. Then Listen and Comprehend fully on her side of the story without suspicion. Ask her not to do those things with that guy, or come to a compromise; she did that dude, so you could do one of her friends or family with her full knowledge and consent of the act; in that case, she would see from her point of view how you felt when she went out and did that dude.
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No comment.
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So Chris would fuck a mailbox....ow my head (:_(
 
Re: What if Chris gets a sweetheart and then she cheats on h

I think he would rage on Facebook about it.
 
Re: What if Chris gets a sweetheart and then she cheats on h

Chris would probably just forgive her, cause he certainly wouldn't break up with a real sweetheart, he would need her too much. Also remember how he didn't seem to care when Panda Halo got raped by Clyde Cash? Also Chris is very stupid, any woman could cheat on him constantly, and he would never figure it out. But if he did find out his reaction probably wouldn't be anger like a regular person, he would start crying, "Please don't leave me!!!!!????"
 
Would he have toned down his Tomgirl antics?
 
Re: What if Chris gets a sweetheart and then she cheats on h

Picklepower said:
Chris would probably just forgive her, cause he certainly wouldn't break up with a real sweetheart, he would need her too much. Also remember how he didn't seem to care when Panda Halo got raped by Clyde Cash? Also Chris is very stupid, any woman could cheat on him constantly, and he would never figure it out. But if he did find out his reaction probably wouldn't be anger like a regular person, he would start crying, "Please don't leave me!!!!!????"
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This, particularly if she was apologizing while she told him. You can fuck Chris over and over and over again online and you can bullshit him into forgiving you. It's trivial. IRL I almost can't imagine a situation where Chris would grow a pair and stand up to his sweetheart.
 
Re: What if Chris gets a sweetheart and then she cheats on h

She'd almost be legally allowed to cheat on Chris.

If CWC was schizophrenic, CWCville (and the Electronic Hedgehog Pokemon) would become 'real', at least from his viewpoint.. I do remember him mentioning that he believes Sonichu or something follows him around everywhere, so..
 
Re: What if Chris gets a sweetheart and then she cheats on h

I imagine that despite what he said, Chris would throw a fit... assuming he ever found out. I imagine that the woman would keep it from him because she'd assume that he's not bright enough to find out. Eventually he would because Chris isn't that stupid despite his attempts to prove to the contrary, and Chris would start screaming at the woman. He probably would bring up the idea of banging one of her friends or some random woman, which would probably prove unfruitful since he can't get someone without paying him and the woman would probably just laugh and walk out.

The only way I see him gettin ga woman is if he's her meal ticket to a free house, so odds are she'd placate him and keep screwing the guy on the side.

He'd become the male version of Gabrielle Chana. http://www.gabriellechana.com/
 
Re: What if Chris gets a sweetheart and then she cheats on h

But really, she could cheat on him as much as she wants, he would never fucking find out LOL he's so dumb he would never connect the dots, she could make up the shittiest excuses for why she was out till 4:00 am and he would believe her.
 
Hey, now, not all schizophrenics are psychotic and think their delusions are real. The untreated ones, sure, but the ones who are on medicine and are being treated shouldn't act like that. But then again, Chris would refuse treatment and not take antipsychotic meds ("those are for crazy people!"), so maybe that's what you meant.

Symptoms of da schizo include difficulty in social situations and trouble controlling emotions. Given that CWC is already autistic, schizophrenia would really screw up his ability to socialize. Chris would be even more depressed than he is now.

Antipsychotic meds also make you blow up like a freakin' balloon. Chris would be 75-100 lbs. fatter than he is now.

Some forms of schizophrenia include the symptom avolition (not wanting to do anything), so Chris would be even lazier than he is now.
 
What do you mean if? He talked to Sonichu while MLW was scolding him.
 
Re: What if Chris gets a sweetheart and then she cheats on h

I don't think he'd be mad at her at all. What I think would happen is that Chris would go on an insane tard-rage rant about how all men are JERKS and how he will never be with his sweetheart because after 30 years of searching for a sweetheart the moment he finds one an evil jerk comes swooping in and steals her right away and how he will die alone because the world is a conspiracy against him to keep him from getting a sweetheart and a lot of that crap we've already heard a bunch of times. Promptly followed of course by a desperate "PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME" cry to her, hopefully in video form. And then after he's all cried out he would start ranting on Facebook about how she was a troll all along because obviously no sane woman would ever cheat on him.
 
I thought he was already schizophrenic when he was talking to Sonichu when in the middle of his meeting with MLW at PVCC.
 
DrChristianTroy said:
Black Sonichu said:
If he refused to go back to March 2000 and stop Sonichu from being made, then I would say that I've taken dumps that have more brains than him. :stupid:
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If this is the case then your poop is smarter than Chris. Sonichu wasn't his downfall in his eyes.
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You're right. Sonichu wasn't his downfall.

His unwillingness to abandon Sonichu was, and I guess kind of still is.

Re: What if Chris gets a sweetheart and then she cheats on h

somejerk said:
The response
I would talk with her; tell her how you feel about her doing those things with this other dude, but DO NOT voice threat or anger; Maintain a CALM Voice Tone. Then Listen and Comprehend fully on her side of the story without suspicion. Ask her not to do those things with that guy, or come to a compromise; she did that dude, so you could do one of her friends or family with her full knowledge and consent of the act; in that case, she would see from her point of view how you felt when she went out and did that dude.
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No comment.
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That red part isn't even funny, just...weird. I sure hope the guy asking Chris for girlfriend advice wasn't serious, for his own sake, but you never know.

And of course, Chris thinks she will come right back to you after you fuck one of her female friends like he's suggesting.
 
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Let's suppose that a certain number of former students decides to go to Chris's reunion - and a number of epic weeners tag along naturally.

How would this reunion go? Where would it take place? What would happen?

My bet: Chris arranges a "children's party" at McDonald's so the reunion can take place at his favorite dining-out location - and he also wants to live the life of a teenager at highschool and has seen a number of movies/shows where teenagers have romantic dates at McD, so he may think this is the optimal place to hit on his gal-pals, have romantic dinner conversation and hold hands.

When the guests see what they've gotten themselves into, half of them leaves in a hurry, the other half stays out of curiosity, alongside the JULAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY epic weeners.

It ends badly for Chris when he get's touchy-feely with a lady. :alog:
 
one of my favorite cwc stories is when he invited people to his front yard in february for his birthday.

and really really hope it's one of those scenarios.
 
I think if he woke up back in Manchester High, which I am glad to have found a thread for, he would probably try a lot harder to get girlfriends, but this would end up alienating them even more than he already has. He might probably also reconsider Sonichu and dump the whole idea, of course this is assuming he actually has a clue.

Oh forget it, he probably won't do one tiny little thing differently. :alog:

I'm sure the Manchester High School Class of 2000 will be absolutely thrilled to hear about all the great accomplishments Chris has made over the past decade or so. Of course, that kind of depends on who shows up for the reunion as well.
 
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