Containment What If?

Bob would've lived a couple of years more due to not getting stress from Chris. Assuming they still got married, Barb would buy even more junk, eventually creating some type of junk golem, formed by the complex virus being developed in whatever house they'd be living in, and not being absorbed and killed by Chris' stench. Eventually, this golem would consume Barb, who would lazily attempt to crawl away. She would return as a junk monster, going around and eating unsuspecting prey with the junk golem, only to spit them out. This would soon spread all over Ruckersville and possibly Charlotesville, leading to those two areas being quarantined, due to the junk monsters.

In other words, without Chris, there'd be a half-assed Zombie Apocalypse, only with junk monsters.

That, and I'd be a bit more bored.
 
Personally, I'm kind of curious about the year he was homeschooled (was it 5th grade?)

But uh, what if he was homeschooled (presumably by Barb and Bob) for much longer than that? Or his entire K-12 schooling was from home? I have a feeling he'd probably be even worse at socializing... but I dunno.
 
Re: What if Chris was homeschooled for most/all of his life?

he'd be a hard core Creationist I imagine
 
Re: What if Chris was homeschooled for most/all of his life?

His life would probably be very much different. I'd say:
- No "gal-pals" that he counted as missed opportunities, and maybe less resentment toward JERKS.
- Without Kellie Andes, the original tomboy, maybe he wouldn't be so into tom-ism.
- Sonichu wouldn't exist, because Bob and Barb wouldn't care if he drew copyrighted characters for schoolwork
- Bionic wouldn't exist either because he never managed a basketball team
- Bob and Chris's move to Richmond was triggered by school events, so that never would have happened
- Sarah Hammer would have continued to be his "girl next door" all the way up till adulthood. Who knows what kind of weirdness that would have spawned.
- He probably never would have gone to college, or failed out almost immediately due to Borb's education being even more slipshod than the school district's.

The Love Quest and his mall antics would probably still exist, since that was partially triggered by "losing" Sarah. The Game Place and Megan stuff would presumably have happened in a similar way too.
 
I manage to live 80, 81 years. I survived pneumonia, two operations, a stroke. If that bed-hopping relic Barb can survive living with him, I sure can.
 
Re: What if Chris was homeschooled for most/all of his life?

I go to church with a lot of homeschooling families. Homeschooled children are NOT any less well-socialized than kids who go to public school. There are support groups for homeschooling families, and it's not like most homeschooling families are wacko survivalist recluses who don't have contact with other people.

But I agree with Surtur. Most homeschooling families are pretty conservative religiously, so he wouldn't have to study evolution if his parents didn't want him to. Sadly, Borb could indoctrinate him with their "values" as much as they wanted to. I don't know how wacky their beliefs are, and with CWC's literal mind, he wouldn't be able to see any nuances and be a hardcore supporter of whatever his parents taught him.
 
Re: What if Chris was homeschooled for most/all of his life?

Ah, probably should've mentioned I'm homeschooled myself, that's why I was kind of interested in discussing the subject. x3

But yeah while it's not right to generalize all homeschool students as sheltered, uber-conservative, and socially-awkward, the problem is that there's homeschoolers who ARE like that because their parents (or whoever's teaching them) are awful teachers.
 
Re: What if Chris was homeschooled for most/all of his life?

GrandNumberOfPounds said:
But I agree with Surtur. Most homeschooling families are pretty conservative religiously, so he wouldn't have to study evolution if his parents didn't want him to. Sadly, Borb could indoctrinate him with their "values" as much as they wanted to. I don't know how wacky their beliefs are, and with CWC's literal mind, he wouldn't be able to see any nuances and be a hardcore supporter of whatever his parents taught him.
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That's the thing with Chandler "values." They don't really raise you to be a destructive/obstructive sociopolitical force like anti-evolutionists; they raise you to be a petty, myopic ass.
 
Re: What if Chris was homeschooled for most/all of his life?

School was just another place like toys r us for borb to dump Chris off at so they didn't have to deal with him.
 
Re: What if Chris was homeschooled for most/all of his life?

It's cool that you're homeschooled. If I ever get married and have kids, I think I'd like to homeschool them if it's a possibility. I think the current educational system is behind the times, not to mention the horrible bureaucracy that goes with it. Looking at stuff like Khan Academy and other self-teaching systems, I think the future of education will be exciting.

Yeah, Bob might be a decent teacher because he didn't put up with CWC's crap as much as Barb. Barb would probably be like Cartman's mom like in that one episode of South Park and just let CWC play vidya and watch TV instead of doing schoolwork.
 
Re: What if Chris was homeschooled for most/all of his life?

GrandNumberOfPounds said:
Yeah, Bob might be a decent teacher because he didn't put up with CWC's crap as much as Barb. Barb would probably be like Cartman's mom like in that one episode of South Park and just let CWC play vidya and watch TV instead of doing schoolwork.
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Remember that Bob's name was on the lawsuit against the Greene County board of education, which kinda calls his judgment-a key quality for any teacher-into question.
 
Re: What if Chris was homeschooled for most/all of his life?

GrandNumberOfPounds said:
I go to church with a lot of homeschooling families. Homeschooled children are NOT any less well-socialized than kids who go to public school.
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How about homeschooled children of ailing septuagenarians who don't care? I can't imagine Bob or Barb taking the initiative to connect with the support groups out there.
 
Re: What if Chris was homeschooled for most/all of his life?

Strangely enough, the oldest couple in my church with children were in their 30's when their kids were born, and their daughters attend a public high school.

One couple who homeschooled had a son with autism, but they moved to Texas a few years ago so I don't really know how he's doing, but I heard his autism is pretty mild and he used to get treatment for it but doesn't need it anymore. I hear he's a wizard at math, his dad is a chemical engineer and his two oldest brothers are going to college for engineering and math.

But yeah, homeschooling a child with autism would be challenging, which means CWC would need all the help he could get.
 
Nobody would know who Cole Smithey is.
 
I would probably find nothing special on the Internet.
 
I'd be more socially isolated and I wouldn't be able to know anything about Canada
 
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