Containment What If?

What if Chris discovered that he can be paid to take part in medical trials?
Considering Bob 'n' Barb's misconceptions about contemporary mental health, what are the odds she'd let Chris be a part of such experiments?
 
What if Chris discovered that he can be paid to take part in medical trials?
Assuming he could work up the motivation to go, and that he doesn't get rejected outright for all the reasons other people have listed, and he doesn't storm out when the lab refuses to reimburse him for travel expenses and a stop at McDonalds... assuming he clears all those hurdles, he'll insist on choosing which drugs he gets to test, or maybe even start telling them which drugs they should invent. And then he'll storm out, go home, and make a Facebook post about those dang greedy scientists who robbed him.
 
I wonder how Chris would handle being in the Mars One project (assuming they'd let him in and the project actually worked)? Considering that he rarely even leaves Virginia and only went to California once, going to an alien world may not be the best thing for him.
 
I wonder how Chris would handle being in the Mars One project (assuming they'd let him in and the project actually worked)? Considering that he rarely even leaves Virginia and only went to California once, going to an alien world may not be the best thing for him.

He'd declare NASA to be DANG DIRTY TROLLS as soon as he realised that there's no green alien girl waiting for him.
 
I wonder how Chris would handle being in the Mars One project (assuming they'd let him in and the project actually worked)? Considering that he rarely even leaves Virginia and only went to California once, going to an alien world may not be the best thing for him.
he'd refuse to go unless someone pays him for gas to go up there or something and regardless it's more than the 300mile threshold of his anyway.
chris doesn't like doing new and interesting things
 
I wonder how Chris would handle being in the Mars One project (assuming they'd let him in and the project actually worked)? Considering that he rarely even leaves Virginia and only went to California once, going to an alien world may not be the best thing for him.
I don't know, he spends most of his time in his room anyway, being in a sealed capsule on Mars probably wouldn't make much difference to his lifestyle. The problem is that Barb wouldn't let him go without her, so all the freight space and most of the passenger compartments on the Dragon capsule would be taken up with hoard. Also the colony would only have supplies for 8 people, so food would likely run out after a couple of weeks.

Also, Barb would try to sell the used rocket for $846,000,000 (NO HAGGLE).
 
I don't know, he spends most of his time in his room anyway, being in a sealed capsule on Mars probably wouldn't make much difference to his lifestyle. The problem is that Barb wouldn't let him go without her, so all the freight space and most of the passenger compartments on the Dragon capsule would be taken up with hoard. Also the colony would only have supplies for 8 people, so food would likely run out after a couple of weeks.
Think about the possibilities, think about all the surface area Barb can cover with hoard... it's gonna be the first instance of Terra Hoarding.
Also, Barb would try to sell the used rocket for $846,000,000 (NO HAGGLE).

Nah, she'd be willing to give away the rocket for $1,692,000,000. The thrusters need to be unclogged, there's a meteor-hole in the bow and it needs new fuel, but it's a good fixer-upper.
 
Speaking of hoarding and space, I wonder how many priceless moon rocks I can sell Barb before she stops buying...
I might be totally mistaken on this one, but my instincts tell me you could double the amount by gluing googly-eyes and funny hats to the rocks.
 
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What if Chris took his accusations of being cyber bullied to the news and it got published as a story? How would people react to it?
 
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What if Chris took his accusations of being cyber bullied to the news and it got published as a story? How would people react to it?
The trouble is that Chris is not exactly a winning protagonist for that kind of story. The ideal victim for the media should be young, preferably white, preferably attractive, preferably female. Cyber-bullying stories like to portray the victim as a poor undeserving soul who was picked on for no reason by the cackling V-for-Vendetta-masked hordes of 4chan because it confirms that young people are incomprehensible and terrifying. Chris is an obese, unwashed, lecherous, cross-dressing, 32-year-old welfare leech who lives in filth and looks like a serial killer. In fact, for the more conservative news outlet, he's basically Public Enemy Number One.

Classic Chris might have fared slightly better, but not by much.
 
Heh, a public cyberbullying story is an argument Chris would not win.
 
The trouble is that Chris is not exactly a winning protagonist for that kind of story. The ideal victim for the media should be young, preferably white, preferably attractive, preferably female. Cyber-bullying stories like to portray the victim as a poor undeserving soul who was picked on for no reason by the cackling V-for-Vendetta-masked hordes of 4chan because it confirms that young people are incomprehensible and terrifying. Chris is an obese, unwashed, lecherous, cross-dressing, 32-year-old welfare leech who lives in filth and looks like a serial killer. In fact, for the more conservative news outlet, he's basically Public Enemy Number One.

Classic Chris might have fared slightly better, but not by much.
Just imagine: for some unfathomable reason someone makes a sob-story about Chris and how he got bullied, major social networks pick up on it and get mad at the world in general and the internet in particular for mistreating the poor boy so harshly...
And then some asshole links them "Chris drops the N-word" and "Twin falling Towers". God. Bear. DAMN. Imagine the fallout.
 
The trouble is that Chris is not exactly a winning protagonist for that kind of story. The ideal victim for the media should be young, preferably white, preferably attractive, preferably female. Cyber-bullying stories like to portray the victim as a poor undeserving soul who was picked on for no reason by the cackling V-for-Vendetta-masked hordes of 4chan because it confirms that young people are incomprehensible and terrifying. Chris is an obese, unwashed, lecherous, cross-dressing, 32-year-old welfare leech who lives in filth and looks like a serial killer. In fact, for the more conservative news outlet, he's basically Public Enemy Number One.

Classic Chris might have fared slightly better, but not by much.

My thinking was that an outsider could interpret the saga of Chris' battles with da trolls as being a bunch of cyber bullies ganging up on a retarded guy. Hell, even if that same outsider saw more of Chris' dubious acts they might just think "Oh, he's retarded, he doesn't know any better."

Not that I think that, I just thought it would be easy for someone with no familiarity with CWC to mistake him for being a slow-in-da-mind.
 
My thinking was that an outsider could interpret the saga of Chris' battles with da trolls as being a bunch of cyber bullies ganging up on a retarded guy. Hell, even if that same outsider saw more of Chris' dubious acts they might just think "Oh, he's retarded, he doesn't know any better."

Not that I think that, I just thought it would be easy for someone with no familiarity with CWC to mistake him for being a slow-in-da-mind.
You could easily play up either interpretation and get a lot of people to agree with it. But I don't think an unbiased observer would take the "he doesn't know any better" viewpoint without someone pushing it. They'd probably just sit on the fence.
 
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