What's the best way to commit suicide?

[BILLY MAYS]

Be OP.

 

[Rand /pol/]

Be OP.

This has been discussed before

 

[Zaragoza]

In your case I suggest start a school shooting.

Couch blocked

 

[NOT Sword Fighter Super]

Best way?
Probably a bottle of pills.

Coolest way?
Blow your brains out.

 

[skiddlez]

fill water guns with fuel and have a nice squirt gun battle with your friends and when you're done, light up a cigarette to relax

 

[SofondaCox]

Helium hood.

Obligated to add this - anybody reading this in a dark place, be sure to discuss your plans with people you respect and trust, in person, before committing to a course of action. If your situation is dire enough to warrant suicide, it can withstand a bit of uncomfortable conversation.

 

[A Useless Fish]

I don't know about you faggots, but this is how I intend to leave this dumb planet.

 

[AnOminous]

Most reliable and available? Probably the kind of hanging called soft hanging, that just cuts the blood flow to the brain without strangling you. This can be done pretty much anywhere. If you lose consciousness, which should be within seconds, you will die if you are not found.

This is also how most autoerotic asphyxia deaths occur, so if your insurance policy doesn't pay up for suicides, you could always make it look like an accident if you don't mind the embarrassing David Carradine jokes.

 

[Batman VS Tony Danza]

Sexual exhaustion from your mom.

 

[Black Waltz]

all of them at once

 

[MG 620]

Trooning out. A slow suicide but you'll get a lot of girlcocks.

 

[RomanesEuntDomus]

Oh come the fuck on. Do you want to be the umpteenth dude who killed himself in some boring way or do you want to go down as a legend?

Here's what you do: You obtain a couple cinder blocks, a good 20m of Piano-wire and superglue. You make a little loop on one end of the wire, the other you attach to the cinderblocks. You then travel to a high place, a bridge above a river will do nicely.
Put the loop around your head, place Cinderblocks on edge of bridge and glue your hands to your head with the superglue. When you kick the cinderblocks down the bridge, it'll look like you ripped your own head off in a rage.

 

[Yeeb-Renzo]

 

[Krispum Western Chumbler]

Claim your 1/1024th Native American.

 

[Dick Pooman]

Bing says that even a shotgun to the head isn't a sure thing. I'd go the same route tens of thousands of Americans take every year and slip away peacefully after talking some opioids. Worst case scenario (aside from an hero) is you go brain dead from lack of oxygen and you don't feel anything at all, or wake up the next day and try again.

 

[AnOminous]

Worst case scenario (aside from an hero) is you go brain dead from lack of oxygen and you don't feel anything at all, or wake up the next day and try again.

Worst case is you're so brain-damaged you're a non-verbal retard but you're still alive, and too retarded even to try again, and can only grunt and scream and shit yourself.

 

[Dick Pooman]

Worst case is you're so brain-damaged you're a non-verbal exceptional individual but you're still alive, and too exceptional even to try again, and can only grunt and scream and shit yourself.

I remember seeing an interview with a guy who survived a shotgun suicide attempt. Half of his face was missing, he could hardly talk, breathed through a hole in his neck, was blind, and couldn't eat solid food anymore. If you fuck up killing yourself, you probably deserve your newfound potato status.

 

[Caesare]

Most reliable and available? Probably the kind of hanging called soft hanging, that just cuts the blood flow to the brain without strangling you. This can be done pretty much anywhere. If you lose consciousness, which should be within seconds, you will die if you are not found.

This is also how most autoerotic asphyxia deaths occur, so if your insurance policy doesn't pay up for suicides, you could always make it look like an accident if you don't mind the embarrassing David Carradine jokes.

There was a doctor in New Jersey who was in prison for running a pill mill as well as paying one of his patients to murder his wife that was able to kill himself like that. He wrapped a blanket around his neck that night while lying in his bunk and was dead by morning.

He was able to do this without his cellmate or the guards finding out he was dead and not just sleeping until the morning.

 

[RomanesEuntDomus]

You could also just start to dig up dirt on the Clinton Foundation and announce any findings publically.

 

[Applejack]

I've always thought that if I ever got to the point of suicide, I'd rent a plane to fly out to the coast of Russia. I would then jump out wearing a bunch of military gear, a torn parachute, and a fake assassination order in my pocket. Hopefully my death would at least start a small shitshow.