What's the weirdest compliment/backhanded insult you've ever gotten?

[WingsOfDepression]

An emo girl once told me that she would want to be as pale as me so she could look dead.

 

[Lackadaisy]

Someone once told me that I'm a "pretty crier". I look like I have allergies sent by Satan when I cry.

 

[Ughubughughughughughghlug]

Either "you'd be really good looking if you were taller' or "for a guy, you have very feminine looking hands and feet"

I once asked my girlfriend what her favorite thing was about me.

She apparently interpreted the question as meaning what physical trait, or at least I hope so. I had meant personality.

So then, she says, "You're height."

Thanks. I mean, that's not the most superficial trait a person can have, after all.

 

[Dolphin Lundgren]

"You blend into the wall." (Because I'm so white.)

 

[XYZpdq]

a teacher in high school said I was "in competition with the devil"
I never really understood what that meant, but at least I wasn't the devil or working with him I guess.

 

[DDBCAE CBAADCBE]

My psychiatrist once told me "You don't have Aspergers, you're just an asshole."

 

[Lemmingwise]

I once asked my girlfriend what her favorite thing was about me.

She apparently interpreted the question as meaning what physical trait, or at least I hope so. I had meant personality.

So then, she says, "You're height."

Thanks. I mean, that's not the most superficial trait a person can have, after all.

Honestly, I love these kind of compliments, because you'll never slip, you'll never lose why they like you.

 

[Sped Xing]

I've been complimented on my fashion sense, which has to be intended as cutting, since my method for choosing clothes is to pick through Goodwill for something that fits

 

[Stranger Neighbors]

I have a really fat Hispanic man that works the opposite shift of me (he is probably edging 400 pounds) people used to always come in and call me his name and would say "Wow! You've lost sooo much weight"

Thats when I knew it was time to return to the gym

 

[nonvir_1984]

Does, "You really understand normal people for someone who's autistic" count?
I replied that only a fucking neurotypical could say something as insensitive as that to a sociopath.

 

[PT 940]

During one of the many boring nights I spent closing at my old retail job, one of my male coworkers and I started going back and forth quoting Kevin Smith movies to pass time and after a while he told me "I wish I could put your brain in a hot chick's body, then you'd be the perfect girl."

 

[Lemmingwise]

I am really naive and I had a brain fart during a conversation with my used to be crush. I had realized I said something stupid and was feeling a bit inferior about it to which he replied at least you are attractive. My ego was definitely feeling that bruise.

During one of the many boring nights I spent closing at my old retail job, one of my male coworkers and I started going back and forth quoting Kevin Smith movies to pass time and after a while he told me "I wish I could put your brain in a hot chick's body, then you'd be the perfect girl."

Together you two would be the perfect girl.


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btw here's a backhanded compliment that I overheard someone make and never forgot due to how ambiguous it is.

"Wow you're really unique. You're like, one out of a hundred!"

 

[BroccoliBrain]

Nurse told me ”you’ve got nice veins". She was taking my blood but wtf does that mean? Or was that meant to put me at ease (which I didn’t need)?

I’ve been told I have beautiful eyelashes, lol.

It’s nice when guys have pretty eyes. Apparently men’s eyelashes grow faster/longer than women’s but I dunno if that’s outdated trivia bullshit. One of my friends complains his keep brushing up against the lens of his glasses and gets in his field of vision and it makes me jealous lol

 

[Chichan]

My ex-best friend told me I had pretty eyes and then said it was shame that I wasn't a lesbian. It was like one of those thank you moments with a question mark. I did not know how to feel about it.

 

[Lemmingwise]

Nurse told me ”you’ve got nice veins". She was taking my blood but wtf does that mean? Or was that meant to put me at ease (which I didn’t need)?

She was just happy you made her job easy. Sometimes it's like dowsing for oil and sometimes it's easy where to draw blood.

 

[Sprig of Parsley]

She was just happy you made her job easy. Sometimes it's like dowsing for oil and sometimes it's easy where to draw blood.

Pretty much. Mine apparently aren't the easiest to hit, last time I donated blood she moved that damn needle around and around and finally gave up and called over a vampire veteran to figure it the fuck out.

 

[Crocketron]

I often times get complimented for having a British accent... Despite me being an american I take it as somewhat in both ways.

 

[Sprig of Parsley]

I often times get complimented for having a British accent... Despite me being an american I take it as somewhat in both ways.

Supposedly New Englanders sound like Brits to people who've never heard a Brit outside of TV.

The good news is that Brit accents supposedly drop panties. The bad is that most of those panties belong to obese Doctor Who and Sherlock fangirls.

 

[FierceBrosnan]

Once in high school a friend of mine said I have "hands like a chick". NOT ANYMORE CASSIE! In all fairness though she meant I had nice nails and slender fingers.

Also anytime anyone in the company says they "appreciate" me. I really hate that word, like to an obscene degree, because it's never followed up on with things like better pay, or being able to actually take time off, just a bigger workload.

 

[Crocketron]

Supposedly New Englanders sound like Brits to people who've never heard a Brit outside of TV.

This is true but then they feel bad after telling them the truth, where i'm from it's more rednecks and religious people.