Honestly, my shits just not right. In theory I could have settled down around mid-late 2021 but I had a lot of stress getting to me even then and I hated that job tbh. Then 2022 came and I decided to just take that L early and sit that year out. That said, I would like a partner in my life. Trying to draw from my family has been a failure in terms of someone worth being stressed out (with one exception) and having someone help me out without trying to give me a lecture or being resentful at me taking the lead would be an amazing relief. Otherwise, I can't see myself getting invested like I used to be.
It's been like 8 or 9 years or so since I've found a woman worth settling down with. She was very intelligent, down-to-earth, kind, talented and Catholic and she could take the somewhat vulgar jocular ways of men without acting likw she's offended or weirded out. Unfortunately, I was too immature and chickenshit as a college freshman to make my move and fucked up the chance, which I still regret to this day. We remained friends while we were still in my Physics 1 class (which funny enough we shared in high school), but after that all communications went dark. It was pretty crushing on a personal level and while I moved on a bit by burying myself in work and hanging out with my friends in undergrad doing nerd shit in the CS/Math department, it still kinda stung. Ever since my friends graduated (they were upperclassmen compared to me), I've talked to a few women and got rejected which personally, I didn't really care about them and just wanted to get access to sex. I gradually just stopped caring since I just came to realize most women aren't that interesting past their looks. Right now, I'm just doing research and picking up hobbies like playing the guitar. I still hold hope I can find the right woman, but I'm trying to make it a lasting relationship, not a honeymoon followed by 40+ years of misery or a quick fling. I just kinda dropped entire groups of people I've felt were holding me down since they generally add very little to my life. Sure I hang out with acquaintances once in awhile, but I prefer to be alone at the moment. Good company is always best but no company is better than bad company by a longshot.
It doesn't help I am attracted to Eurasian, Blasian and Asian women almost exclusively in an area with a dearth of these types of women.
I can't stand normies. Going into any "geeky" spaces is just normies+ nowadays with extra Reddit (I fucking detest TTRPGs and most popular video games), and doing the more outdoors stuff I like has the opposite problem where my niche interests are completely alien. I'm always on the edge of being far too weird yet at the same time well-adjusted no matter where I go—sure I might meet someone who likes hiking/fishing/foraging and such, but are they going to tolerate me sperging out over vinyl toys and dolls? Fuck no. And that's not even getting into my extreme political positions.
That, and I'm pretty sure I'm asexual, or at least a severe schediaphiliac.
If you're a guy, the doll shit is something you basically have to ambush them with after they're invested in the relationship. I'm assuming you mean anime and transformers shit.
If a woman, then odds are most guys will either find it cute depending on what it is or see you as a consumer retard.
In my experience anyone who hunts for food/ goes mushroom hunting is a fucking autist, but are extremely guarded. You need to wear them down after like three weeks of association.
For a variety of reasons, both self-inflicted and external, I was not socially-inclined at a young age. It was a struggle to interact with people without going into hypersensitive, anxiety-riddled fits, so I gradually learned to distance myself from other people because it was becoming hugely embarrassing how poorly I dealt with the other kids. At the time, I kept to a small group of friends and didn't branch out much. I had a handful of crushes, but I had no real social skills, so they either went nowhere or ended in heartbreak.
By the end of high school, avoiding people helped me reevaluate myself and my relationship with social settings. I chilled out significantly, started exercising regularly, and improved my social network. While I was definitely in a better position, some of my hermit tendencies never really faded away. In general, I don't get much validation out of social outings. I enjoy going out, but I definitely have an inclination towards introverted hobbies. As such, I'm not exactly getting tons of exposure to social setting and I don't get a whole lot out of meeting new people in the first place. I've gone on a few dates just to try it, but I have a low tolerance for flirting and absolutely loathe the song and dance of trying to stand out in a sea of bachelors all trying to capture the affection of random women. I'd like to believe the cliche that there's someone for everyone out there, but at this point, I'm not holding my breath and I've gotten good at leading my own life
A bountiful, happy family is my ultimate lifetime goal, and yet..
Any kind of hints at romance, let alone relationships ended as soon as high school ended. It's been close to a decade at this point. Didn't really have a proper male figure in my life to teach me correct ways to interact with the girls of same age, so I still subconsciously hold onto the ingrained school-era belief that trying to talk to someone out of the blue would instantly label me as a some weird undesirable retard.
Honestly no clue where to begin to even look for someone who'd be willing to settle down for a slow, rural way of life. I do not really believe in online dating so that makes the search even harder in the current age. So far my attempts have been mostly letting relatives and close friends know of what I'm looking for in hopes they might know a friend, or a friend of a friend who'd fit the bill. Another thing I haven't tried is actually going to some local village community and signing up for their activities. I mean, if you want a village girl then best bet is to look for one from the appropriate environment, right? Here's to hoping for the best.
tl;dr I don't want some romantic relationship experience at this point anymore, a big family with lots of kids is all I wish for.
I've never been that socially inclined, only have ever had a small number of friends at any given time. I guess you could call it social anxiety, it's just really hard for me to initiate with a stranger since I feel like I'd also be weirded out if someone I didn't know came up to me and started talking. I do try going out to some events, usually pinball tournaments where I've made a few acquaintances. Generally most of my hobbies are either individualistic or completely male dominated so the chances of meeting a single woman is basically zero. Or I'm into something and the general crowd that's into it are massive spergs who I have zero interest in ever meeting.
Dating apps are complete garbage. Most profiles I saw basically fell into four categories, basic bitches, morbidly obese, instagram thots, and "ethically" non-monogamous. I kept on em for a while, since I don't know where the hell else I'm going to meet someone. Had a few extremely infrequent dates(like maybe one every few months) that went absolutely nowhere. Recently deleted mine, I just finally got sick of getting absolutely nothing out of it. I'd say I'm average looking, I run just about every day, have a good job, own my own place, and generally have my shit together, but that's just not enough on apps to get your foot in the door.
So I don't know what I'll do. I'd say I'm mostly content by myself but I'd still like a relationship.
A bountiful, happy family is my ultimate lifetime goal... I don't want some romantic relationship experience at this point anymore, a big family with lots of kids is all I wish for.
I've always been a bit of a retard in terms of social skills. I don't have much of a filter on my language and I'm inherently an extreme introvert (hanging out with people I genuinely enjoy the company of will tire me out for a day or two after within the span of an hour, let alone those I can't stand) so already hanging out with people and going outside in general is not really my style. Add that to the fact that I want to marry within my religion (but not to reform or the ultra-orthodox) and that already shrinks the dating pool down to a really tiny portion of the population. Then you also have to exclude the pathetic soyjak archetypes, the hopeless neets who won't leave their bedrooms for long enough to date, the LARPers who claim to be of the religion solely for pity points, anybody above the age of 30 and any political extremists... which probably leaves, what, 1 million people worldwide? Max?
It also doesn't help that i'm sort of detached from the culture of the country due to my family's background and lack of contact with said culture outside of the internet. I'm sure plenty of people would call that a good thing, especially considering all the deranged shit that's now considered normal, but it kind of makes it hard to relate to people and really doesn't help in terms of looking for a partner.
The issues kind of just pile onto each other from there. My hobbies and interests are far and few in between and I interact with them in ways that seem strange to most people those being fanfic, art, and autistic worldbuilding (I like a few unproductive things to an extremely autistic extent instead of having a varying pool of interests i'm less attached to); I'm hardly interested in sex but still want a non-adoptive family, and even then I'm not confident that raising one is what I truly want; I actively dislike the internet (or, more accurately, what it has become) and especially mobile phones, to the point where I have never owned a phone and never want to (in other words, dating apps are out of the question)... if I was a dude, I'd probably be a stereotypical neet by now.
I'm not sure if I should even be posting in this thread because I'm technically "in my prime" when it comes to this stuff instead of definitively single for life or anything- it sort of makes me feel like I'm diminishing the issues of those older than me by putting myself on a similar level. One or two guys I used to know have even complimented me or expressed interest in a relationship. But i've never felt anything close to a romantic connection with them back (or anyone else for that matter) and it's hard enough to find a friend let alone a mate, so I am posting regardless.
For me, I think this stuff is like the fourth rung on a ladder I haven't even begun to climb yet. Before I tackle any of this shit I should find some friends first, I keep thinking.
But I've got 10 years max to find someone if I want kids, I don't get along with the vast majority of women I've met, and befriending dudes near-exclusively will eventually lead to some of them wanting to take the relationship further even if I don't want that back- which is a detriment to me finding and keeping friends, which keeps me further away from finding a husband. And that prompts worry because of the aforementioned time limit.
At this point I think I've kind of uneasily accepted how things are going to be. I'll be single unless I get really lucky. I'll still seek someone out- albeit passively, not through dating-oriented services or anything- and if I can't find a good man then I'll settle for second-best before I reach middle age.
That's probably subject to change considering I've still got time, and I'm grateful for that, but it hasn't yet so here I am I guess.
I’m a right-leaning gay guy who detests the majority of the “””community””” and who would actually want a long-term monogamous relationship, not a constant stream of fuck toys, which just doesn’t happen in gay circles unless the stars align just right every millennia. I’m also getting old enough to where although a relationship would be nice, I’m just as comfortable appreciating being single and able to enjoy my free time (and my money) on my own merits
I'm a very introverted guy who likes doing things on my own which is why it's really difficult for me to meet single women who share the same interests as most of my hobbies are solitary. I tried meeting girls thru an anime club (yes I was very I know) on Meetup.com several years ago but all the girls in the group were either obese landwhales or they just acted like massive spergs, as to be expected.
I haven't tried any dating apps in over a decade now but the last time I did it was a horrible experience as all of the women in my area were either very unattractive, single moms, morbidly obese and/or 49'ers who were just there for free attention from beta orbiters.
Honestly it seems like most women these days are more interested in being some guy's sidechick instead of having a relationship. I really don't understand why "modern" women seem to love getting passed around by so many guys these days...
Hell it's pretty fucking hard just to meet new people when you're in your 30's and out of college, let alone meeting women.
I want what my parents, grandparents, and great-grandparents had, but I really don't have much to offer and I want to be better off money wise before seriously going after someone. I don't really see the allure in fucking around.
I really never had a girlfriend. I had a fling with a girl or two, but I just kinda found them grating and we really didn't share any hobbies or beliefs. I envy my brothers and cousins who are married because they really make them happy.
To a man, women will eternally be grating. They exist in a different paradigm and it's important to understand this. You learn to overlook the irritating traits of women because the pride and legacy of a family is worth dying for. Also, trust me, women are equally irritated by men and our bullshit.
Honestly, my shits just not right. In theory I could have settled down around mid-late 2021 but I had a lot of stress getting to me even then and I hated that job tbh. Then 2022 came and I decided to just take that L early and sit that year out. That said, I would like a partner in my life. Trying to draw from my family has been a failure in terms of someone worth being stressed out (with one exception) and having someone help me out without trying to give me a lecture or being resentful at me taking the lead would be an amazing relief. Otherwise, I can't see myself getting invested like I used to be.
I mean this with love, but you have to stop being such a bitch. Stop making excuses, life will always be stressful for an ever-changing variety of reasons. Go get what you want and manage life as it comes.
Was in 6 1/2 year long relationship, She ended it last June a few months before we where supposed to be married last fall. But one day despite Knowing my political views for years all of a sudden she had with me making fun of troons
What happen was there is a troon the county I live in who is completely crazy ( even has a 100+ thread on this site just look up David "Susan" Stone). I always laughed at this person every time I would see this person in the distance in real life. Her family and her would also talk and laugh about this person since this person is infamous where I live. But one day I guess her viewes did a 180 and she got enraged at me for making fun of David stone and didn't talk to me for days then she broke it off with me because she said "I don't like you making fun of those kind people", once again despite the fact we both made fun of this person FOR YEARS.
So I didn't spoke to her for almost a year and I had a few dates and even a one night stand since then. But the idea of a woman just turning on me out of nowhere after years of dating really made me disillusioned about being in a LTR.
Honestly its a couple of things. Money for one. For another every time I got into a relationship it turned out badly. I'm not even really all that interested in a wife.... I'd rather just adopt a kid.
I know) on Meetup.com several years ago but all the girls in the group were either obese landwhales or they just acted like massive spergs, as to be expected.
