why are you still single - and general discussion of the dating game

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Cause I don't bring a lot to the table and fear I'd probably end up being an awful partner just because I'd be too socially retarded and accidentally hurt a romantic partner's feelings.

Father also died at a young age and I definitely feel like I missed out on a hell of a lot of life lessons and influence at formative years of my life that I kinda spent most of my twenties slowly picking up for myself here and there.
 
This might be so obvious that it sounds retarded to even bring it up, but something for you incels to know is that you want to steal a lot of really obvious glances at girls you're interested in. They can tell anyways (have way more awareness of being looked at than men), but that's like pre-flirting. You don't want to rape them with your eyes. You don't want to stare. But you just keep flitting your eyes back to them in a playful and friendly way that you clearly don't care much that you're being seen (different from an autist trying to avoid being seen).

If you do this it's actually a pretty good way of teasing an interested woman into approaching you or otherwise reciprocating. It came to me thinking about it today.

This might sound completely retarded but I think I've gotten better at reading eye contact from playing with my cat. I'm very empathetic with animal body language and a big chunk of that with cats is doing this slow blinking, narrowing the eyes, just mimicry really. (Ex-girlfriend told me once I cuddle like a cat, and this long before I ever had a pet cat, so maybe I'm just fucked in the head.) At some point I realized that's basically what normalfaggots do when they flirt.

I've been thinking a lot about that Muslim woman I met. I actually feel a lot more attractive lately. I'm in social situations where I feel like there's several women in the room that I feel are at least a bit into me, but often I can't approach because my job forbids it. What's a bigger problem now is physical touch/escalation. It just rarely comes up. I think the last time I was hugged by a non-relative was going on seven or eight years ago. Even with that ex-girlfriend, that I've talked about before, I was very passive with that. I actually asked her for a hug the first time, which would normally have been bad I gather, but in that specific situation it kind of made me cuter to her. Don't really remember my first kiss. That seems awfully odd, like you'd think it'd be burned into my psyche, but it just doesn't stand out compared to hugging her or some other things. Like once, we were laying on a bed together, been watching a movie. Obviously the whole thing should have been a build up to making out, but I'm a moron, I don't know what I'm doing. Finally she gets sick of listening me to prattle autistically about some bullshit (I'm too embarassed to admit what bullshit) and she drags me in, starts making out, then tells me it was the only way to shut me up. Point taken, everything from that point on came naturally.

Was another time I kissed her on the forehead. Remember that because it made her glow. I did that mostly just because she was so short - a foot shorter than me - but apparently women often take that as a sign of some deep caring. Which became true when I realized that.

I don't tend to feel a whole lot of interest for women of my own kind. I think I know the real reason, and it's that as someone that's always felt like a bit of an alien and been a bit of a bigot I relate, in some way, to them more and feel like they're more approachable in some way. Isn't that there haven't been White American women I've been interested in or felt some attraction to or even mutual attraction to, but they don't drive my interest. It's worse lately as all this business about Roe v Wade, and meeting that Muslim, has put a very foul taste in my mouth towards Western women. I've also noticed and felt bad that I find women with my own accent somewhat of a turnoff.
 
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Eh, I've got too much baggage at the moment. Once I'm at a point where I don't saddle a potential partner with all that crap, then I'll take it from there. Until then, it's time to work on MY issues rather than make them someone else's burden.
 
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This might be so obvious that it sounds retarded to even bring it up, but something for you incels to know is that you want to steal a lot of really obvious glances at girls you're interested in. They can tell anyways (have way more awareness of being looked at than men), but that's like pre-flirting. You don't want to rape them with your eyes. You don't want to stare. But you just keep flitting your eyes back to them in a playful and friendly way that you clearly don't care much that you're being seen (different from an autist trying to avoid being seen).
I would also add that you should try to make small talk with girls throughout the day if you can. Without being pushy, weird, or socially unacceptable in any way and seeing how they respond, I recently did it with a pharmacist who looked like a junior girl in the middle school I went to. She properly responded and kept the conversation going asking me stuff back, which is a decent confidence boost tbh. If she thought I was repugnant she wouldn't have kept the conversation going and just stopped after responding to my first question.
 
I've never been a very approachable individual. I think it runs on my family, as almost none of them are either
 
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Easy, I'm unattractive and can't commit to an outfit much less a partner. Relationships are something other people do, not me.
 
Then what? Fuck your fist in a cold lifeless bed for the rest of your life?
This in theory... and then the isolation of having zero friends IRL builds up and makes me want to kill myself. You can't win!
Both of you are attention-seeking insecure bitches. Learn to enjoy your own damn company and find something to occupy your mind instead of living as an ego-tripping whore craving for attention just like a crackhead craves for dope.

As if we don't have to wear enough masks to deal with everyday bullshit. It's one thing to do it because you have to but willingly submitting yourself to it because you seek out peer approval? Or because you're a needy asshole? Last time I worried about that I was in high school.
Just go say hi, smile, don't say anything super autistic or overstay your welcome the first time you talk to a girl.
Why do people insist basic courtesy is the secret formula for attraction? If one take it at face-value it will only lead to an embarassing misunderstanding.

Don't mistake being treated nicely with someone being interested in you.
 
Both of you are attention-seeking insecure bitches. Learn to enjoy your own damn company and find something to occupy your mind instead of living as an ego-tripping whore craving for attention just like a crackhead craves for dope.

As if we don't have to wear enough masks to deal with everyday bullshit. It's one thing to do it because you have to but willingly submitting yourself to it because you seek out peer approval? Or because you're a needy asshole? Last time I worried about that I was in high school.

Why do people insist basic courtesy is the secret formula for attraction? If one take it at face-value it will only lead to an embarassing misunderstanding.

Don't mistake being treated nicely with someone being interested in you.
His question was how to be more approachable. That's the easiest way to get girls to approach you and invite you to stuff and get to know them. You're not going to fuck even every girl that shows interest but you want them to be happy to see you, initiate, and say good stuff to their friends

I don't see any embarrassing misunderstandings unless someone's a turbo autist who would ask a barista to marry them.
 
Even if their titties are big enough somehow they are not anymore in the morning.

Also general question: what is the ideal first date? Something unusual or somehing with an easy escape route?
 
>I make her my clam linguine with sautee'd baby bok choy
>She loves my dog
>I keep steering the conversation towards her interests even though I couldn't give less of a shit about Succession
>We luck out and she wants to watch the Sydney Sweeney romcom
>Night ends and she promptly shows herself out

I legit don't know what I did wrong except maybe fake enthusiasm in something I don't really care about, she even passed the dog test and that bitch is beyond territorial.
 
Not being single has long since been off my mind. I can entertain and stimulate myself, which is why I see the average woman walking around with her iphone halfway out her back pocket and think to myself "yeah she'll be on that thing all day, exercising all the doomscrolling shit Ive worked hard to remove from my own life". Unless of course you go chasing normies in activity clubs and events, but we don't have many of those, and those we do, you end up wondering "what kind of healthy single woman would walk around this random ass faire?". I dont mind sitting on a bench in the park 11AM on a saturday, but what kind of loser would do so? Me I guess, but certainly not the "average but trying" chick I'd want from within my own league. A coworker said their neighbor found their partner in a 'singles club', but much like other such groups about meeting friends; youll only find those who are incapable of making friends themselves, and I'm not -that- sad.
>She loves my dog
>Night ends and she promptly shows herself out
Whenever I do fall in the hole and install dating apps, this is always the outcome. I love typing and wanna have that teenage tummy ache awaiting their next message. Every single time I end up carrying conversation, dragging my balls through glass just to have her reply "yeah haha". Look to the old saying: My wife is my best friend. You need to have friendship, common interests, meet over a passion that then develops into a fiery need to storm her castle.

Sit down and read a bunch of dating profiles and you'll meet exclusively "Demands to you" in her "About me" section; a bunch of nonsense hobbies like traveling and going on walks, and if you finally find someone who has put thought into their text and it all lines up, chances are they're a bot, will ghost you immediately, or "dont feel like texting a novel" and stop replying after 2 texts, knowing full well that phone is in her hand 8 hours a day.
Finding a good Catholic woman that I am attracted to and isn't already married is hard, and the fact that I don't trust online dating doesn't help.
Been tourisminting a bunch of churches lately and holy hell, that shit is divineTM. So many events from knitting to choir to charity, to simply having a historically large church in a small city next to a lake with ye olde monk school halls nearby etc. A ton of events based only partially in religion. I saw a poster about a pianist from one of our biggest churches coming to play in this tiny city. That shit would've been where you brought your Good Wife for religious arousal with intent to produce kids.

Sure you can partake without being religious and Ive done it a few times, but being an actual practitioner of a religion must be easy mode compared to Tinder, D&D grifting and gamergirls leading your homies astray.
 
Jumping in here against my better judgement:

Why am I still single?
-The pandemic killed my wife of 20 years in 2020
-I'm Gen X....all the single women my age are 3 times divorced, never been in a long term relationship, or widowed like me and want to talk about nothing but their grandchildren or church.
-Millenial women are all looking to find someone to help them raise their kid(s).
-Gen Z women are fucking narcissistic morons.

I've also come to the realization, that, aside from physical intimacy, being in a relationship with a woman at this stage of my life offers nothing of benefit or value. I don't need help paying the bills. I don't have children that need raising. I can and do have lots of close female friends of varying ages. In exchange for no sex, I don't have to pay their bills or put up with their bullshit when I don't want to.
After 20 years of marriage, it took a while to realize that not being in a "relationship" is the best thing about my post-pandemic world.
 
In what I feel is descending importance;
No employment prospects
Fear of crowds
Irritable, yet annoying
Slobbish lifestyle
Weird Hobbies
Knowitall
Vascillates constantly between anger and despair
Actual Nazi
Unwilling to develop a false persona
No cocaine

Kinda sucks, kinda rocks, it's how I was meant to be anyway.
 
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